History Main / SafeSaneAndConsensual

15th Feb '17 3:35:50 PM TheSinful
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* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11669575/34/For-Love-of-Magic For Love of Magic]]'', Harry enters a BDSM relationship with Professor Vector and notes that he's rather proud of himself for having a good enough feel for her limits that she's never used their safe words. When he gives her to his other lovers for the night, he makes a point of everyone knowing the safe words (yellow for "ease up" and red for "stop") and reminds Vector that she can stop it at any time.
21st Jan '17 9:15:09 PM Carnildo
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* In theory completely averted in the law of the UK, in which no consent can ever be legally given for anything that goes so far as to leave a mark or bruise, and charges can be made by the police regardless of the consent levels of the participants. However, this law is rarely used against heterosexual sadomasochists (or heterosexual vanilla sex that also leave marks). [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Spanner Homosexuals, on the other hand...]]
** Of course, given that gay marriage is now legal in Britain as of June 2013, it is unlikely that something like Operation Spanner would happen again anytime soon.
** In the UK it was the House of Lords case of R. v. Brown. This was followed in Ontario by its Court of Appeal in R. v. Welch. In the latter case the court stated that S&M is "inherently degrading and dehumanizing" and does not allow someone to consent to harm as they would in an activity with "a generally approved social purpose" such as a contact sport like hockey.
*** Just to demonstrate the unfairness in R v Brown, a UK case - R v Wilson - involving a heterosexual couple showed that there were some circumstances when consent could be a defence for assault in the case of S&M. The man was convicted for assault when he branded his initials on his wife's buttocks on her request, although he was later cleared at the court of appeal - apparently, as the branding was meant to be a personal adornment "like a tattoo", her consent was seen as good enough to have his conviction quashed. You have to wonder whether they would have come to that conclusion if the participants were gay.
** The same is true in Massachusetts, and there have been prosecutions of consensual [=BDSM=] couples who don't choose their doctors or cover their bruises carefully enough.
* Some real-life [=BDSM=] practitioners distinguish between SSC play and RACK play (Risk Aware Consensual Kink). The latter is defined as forms of play that can '''never''' be completely safe (a good example of this is fireplay, which always carries risks).
** Another perspective holds that nothing is completely safe (and [=BDSM=] certainly isn't), and "sane" is subjective and hard to delineate.

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* In theory completely averted in the law of the UK, in which no consent can ever be legally given for anything that goes so far as to leave a mark or bruise, and charges can be made by the police regardless of the consent levels of the participants. However, this law is rarely used against heterosexual sadomasochists (or heterosexual vanilla sex that also leave marks). [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Spanner Homosexuals, on the other hand...]]
** Of course, given that gay marriage is now legal in Britain as of June 2013, it is unlikely that something like Operation Spanner would happen again anytime soon.
** In the UK it was the House of Lords case of R. v. Brown. This was followed in Ontario by its Court of Appeal in R. v. Welch. In the latter case the court stated that S&M is "inherently degrading and dehumanizing" and does not allow someone to consent to harm as they would in an activity with "a generally approved social purpose" such as a contact sport like hockey.
*** Just to demonstrate the unfairness in R v Brown, a UK case - R v Wilson - involving a heterosexual couple showed that there were some circumstances when consent could be a defence for assault in the case of S&M. The man was convicted for assault when he branded his initials on his wife's buttocks on her request, although he was later cleared at the court of appeal - apparently, as the branding was meant to be a personal adornment "like a tattoo", her consent was seen as good enough to have his conviction quashed. You have to wonder whether they would have come to that conclusion if the participants were gay.
** The same is true in Massachusetts, and there have been prosecutions of consensual [=BDSM=] couples who don't choose their doctors or cover their bruises carefully enough.
participants.
* Some real-life [=BDSM=] practitioners distinguish between SSC play and RACK play (Risk Aware Consensual Kink). The latter is defined as forms of play that can '''never''' be completely safe (a good example of this is fireplay, which always carries risks).
**
risks). Another perspective holds that nothing is completely safe (and [=BDSM=] certainly isn't), and "sane" is subjective and hard to delineate.
27th Dec '16 12:58:26 PM WillKeaton
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* This is the core philosophy of Mistress Matisse's and Creator/DanSavage's sex columns for The Seattle Stranger. Savage has specifically said in articles that the only things he considers completely unacceptable are rape, pedophilia, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]] and [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coprophilia coprophilia]]. He also tends to caution against cheating except in very extreme cases (for example, an abusive partner), though he is an advocate for ''consensual'' non-monogamy.

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* This is the core philosophy of Mistress Matisse's and Creator/DanSavage's sex columns for The Seattle Stranger. Savage has specifically said in articles that the only things he considers completely unacceptable are rape, pedophilia, [[BestialityIsDepraved bestiality]], [[ILoveTheDead necrophilia]] and [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coprophilia coprophilia]]. coprophilia.]] He also tends to caution against cheating except in very extreme cases (for example, an abusive partner), though he is an advocate for ''consensual'' non-monogamy.
13th May '16 7:01:16 PM eroock
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-->--"My Conviction", ''Theatre/{{Hair}}''

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-->--"My -->-- "My Conviction", ''Theatre/{{Hair}}''
12th May '16 1:02:21 PM KimiFW
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This trope is about discussing and defining the limits of proper behavior, [[Administrivia/InternalSubtrope or]] simply waving a ConsentFlag. People simply ''doing'' [=BDSM=] in a SSC way is not this trope: It is either CasualKink or BrainsAndBondage, while people doing [=BDSM=] in an anti-SSC way falls under BondageIsBad unless this trope comes into play in some form; for example, the victim or another character pointing out that it's not the proper way to do [=BDSM=].

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This trope is about discussing and defining the limits of proper behavior, [[Administrivia/InternalSubtrope or]] simply waving a ConsentFlag.Consent Flag. People simply ''doing'' [=BDSM=] in a SSC way is not this trope: It is either CasualKink or BrainsAndBondage, while people doing [=BDSM=] in an anti-SSC way falls under BondageIsBad unless this trope comes into play in some form; for example, the victim or another character pointing out that it's not the proper way to do [=BDSM=].
12th Mar '16 8:43:19 PM FuzzyBoots
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* Discussed in the bondage club in ''Film/Bound2015'', specifically to point out that Ryan doesn't follow the rules and is instead a cruel abuser who uses BDSM as an excuse.
20th Feb '16 3:49:44 PM Eievie
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* In more hardcore Dominance and Submission, the kink can be about very deep submission and the giving up of nearly all freedom, the submissive wishing to please their Dominant to levels that risk personal harm. In complete contrast, the submission can even be about a fight for control - where the Dominant takes control of the submissive and the submissive only allows that control after a struggle or the Dominant needing to earn it in some way (e.g. the Dominant needs to force complete restriction on the submissive before they will submit to their will, or there might even be a real physical struggle where the sub will only submit if overcome). In this instance the Dominant and the Submissive consent to the scenario, but the fight for control has an element of risk, sometimes even foregoing safe words (which is generally a really stupid idea unless you have absolute trust in your partner that they won't push you past your hard-line boundaries, or you have a Dungeon Master standing by to intervene if things go too far).
* In hardcore Sadomasochism - Sadism and Masochism - the situation becomes even more involved, where the submissive as the masochist has boundaries that they can't go past - things they like, things they hate, things they tolerate and things they can't stand - and the Dominant as the sadist can choose to ride those boundaries for punishment and pleasure, sometimes inflicting very high levels of pain or discomfort as severe as the sub can tolerate it (and the idea of "toleration" for pain and discomfort can be pushed to the absolute scary limit, and the greater the trust and understanding between Dominant and Submissive the more the boundaries for consent, risk, control, submission and sadomasochism can be pushed (on both sides)).

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* In more hardcore Dominance and Submission, the kink can be about very deep submission and the giving up of nearly all freedom, the submissive wishing to please their Dominant to levels that risk personal harm. In complete contrast, the submission can even be about a fight for control - -- where the Dominant takes control of the submissive and the submissive only allows that control after a struggle or the Dominant needing to earn it in some way (e.g. the Dominant needs to force complete restriction on the submissive before they will submit to their will, or there might even be a real physical struggle where the sub will only submit if overcome). In this instance the Dominant and the Submissive consent to the scenario, but the fight for control has an element of risk, sometimes even foregoing safe words (which is generally a really stupid idea unless you have absolute trust in your partner that they won't push you past your hard-line boundaries, or you have a Dungeon Master standing by to intervene if things go too far).
* In hardcore Sadomasochism - -- Sadism and Masochism - -- the situation becomes even more involved, where the submissive as the masochist has boundaries that they can't go past - -- things they like, things they hate, things they tolerate and things they can't stand - -- and the Dominant as the sadist can choose to ride those boundaries for punishment and pleasure, sometimes inflicting very high levels of pain or discomfort as severe as the sub can tolerate it (and the idea of "toleration" for pain and discomfort can be pushed to the absolute scary limit, and the greater the trust and understanding between Dominant and Submissive the more the boundaries for consent, risk, control, submission and sadomasochism can be pushed (on both sides)).



One notable subversion of this trope is pretending that abuse or exploitation is [=BDSM=] (and thus implied to be SSC). One notable aversion/way of darkly playing it for laughs is to highlight the need for Safe and Sane by sarcastically pretending that consent is all that's needed - [[QuestionableConsent and use an example where someone naively or stupidly agrees to something that they obviously can't handle]].

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One notable subversion of this trope is pretending that abuse or exploitation is [=BDSM=] (and thus implied to be SSC). One notable aversion/way of darkly playing it for laughs is to highlight the need for Safe and Sane by sarcastically pretending that consent is all that's needed - -- [[QuestionableConsent and use an example where someone naively or stupidly agrees to something that they obviously can't handle]].



* In ''Slave Jade'', the female lead is a sexually submissive woman who starts dating a "dominant" psycho who kidnaps her and executes a miserable attempt at inducing StockholmSyndrome. Before they actually met, he seemed to have a very good understanding of consent and safety - what she didn't know is that the bulk of his mails to her were reasonable ideas that he never thought in his own head, but merely copy/pasted from various sites. [[spoiler:In the end, she shoots him and escapes. He survives the bullet and ends up in jail for all he did to her, while her shooting him is ruled as self-defence. In the epilogue she decides to find a new man to dominate her - a man who isn't psycho, but really understand SSC.]]

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* In ''Slave Jade'', the female lead is a sexually submissive woman who starts dating a "dominant" psycho who kidnaps her and executes a miserable attempt at inducing StockholmSyndrome. Before they actually met, he seemed to have a very good understanding of consent and safety - -- what she didn't know is that the bulk of his mails to her were reasonable ideas that he never thought in his own head, but merely copy/pasted from various sites. [[spoiler:In the end, she shoots him and escapes. He survives the bullet and ends up in jail for all he did to her, while her shooting him is ruled as self-defence. In the epilogue she decides to find a new man to dominate her - -- a man who isn't psycho, but really understand SSC.]]



* A core philosophy in ''Theatre/{{Hair}}'' - see page quote

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* A core philosophy in ''Theatre/{{Hair}}'' - -- see page quote
8th Feb '16 2:16:45 AM KingClark
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* The Time Warp from ''Film/TheRockyHorrorPictureShow'' is implied to be this for most, genuinely weird, Transylvanians. Contrast this with Frank-N-Furter's [[{{CorruptTheCutie}} "Experiments" with easily manipulated humans]]

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* The Time Warp from ''Film/TheRockyHorrorPictureShow'' is implied to be this for most, genuinely weird, Transylvanians. Contrast this with Frank-N-Furter's [[{{CorruptTheCutie}} "Experiments" with easily manipulated humans]]humans]].
31st Jul '15 1:10:59 AM MachRider1985
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Added DiffLines:

[[folder:FanWorks]]

* ''Manga/{{Evangelion 303}}'': In chapter 17 twenty-years-old Shinji and Asuka explore their relationship's sexual dynamics further. Asuka wants to try bondage games. When Shinji asks if she is REALLY, ABSOLUTELY sure that she wants getting tied and spanked by him she retorts she is and he better does so now. Later, when he says he is surprised at her being a sub, she explains THAT is the point of fantasy. During the chapter Shinji reflects Asuka had probably fantasized about it for a long time but before him she had never met someone she trusted enough to try it, and she wanted to be sure she could share her secret fantasies with him before their wedding.

[[/folder]]
24th May '15 4:01:03 AM Morgenthaler
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* Discussed in ''TheSMJudge'', as Magda is trying to explain the difference between spousal abuse and what her husband has been doing with her.

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* Discussed in ''TheSMJudge'', ''Film/TheSMJudge'', as Magda is trying to explain the difference between spousal abuse and what her husband has been doing with her.
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