History Main / RealMenHateAffection

* ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyX'': Jecht, Tidus' [[AbusiveParents emotionally abusive father]], truly ''did'' love his son, but was merely bad at showing it. At one point, the party can find a [[CaptainsLog sphere]] Jecht left behind in which he tries to give a sentimental message to Tidus, but ultimately gives up:

* In ''Literature/HarryPotter'', Ron's usual display of affection was clapping Harry on the back. In [[Literature/HarryPotterAndTheHalfBloodPrince]] he's so thrilled to see Harry he practically assaults him, much to Hermione's chagrin.

* In ''Literature/HarryPotter'', Ron's usual display of affection was clapping Harry on the back.

* ''Film/TheLordOfTheRings'' movies averted this - however, that can be chalked up to ValuesDissonance due to the when the original books were written.

** Tim isn't afraid of showing some affection himself. One episode is driven by the fact that his son Brad is embarrassed by Tim telling him "I love you" in front of his friends.

* ''{{Manga/Berserk}}'': Zigzagged in spades. The main male characters, Guts and Griffith, can be described as ambitious, ruthless, {{Jerk Ass}}es, [[MenAreUncultured uncultured]] in the case of Guts, and a monster in the case of Griffith ([[HeWhoFightsMonsters and almost with Guts]]), but one thing for sure is that they're '''not''' afraid to talk about their feelings in very [[WarriorPoet poetic manners]], especially to one another ([[HoYay making certain implications arise]]). In the case of Guts, he can switch from being [[http://www.mangakong.com/manga/Berserk/037.047/210 a gruff jerk]] to being [[http://www.mangakong.com/manga/Berserk/037.047/211 very tender]] [[http://www.mangakong.com/manga/Berserk/037.047/212 and caring]].

* ''ComicBook/SoncTheComic'': WordOfGod is that Sonic has trouble expressing his feelings. Case in point: when Porker Lewis quit the Freedom Fighters, Sonic's anger at him for doing so was in fact because he desperately wanted him to stay, but simply [[EmotionallyTongueTied couldn't spit it out]].

* In ''ScoobyDooMysteryIncorporated'', a large portion of Freddy's ObliviousToLove status stems from his mistaken belief in this trope and like Hank above, was due to his father, Mayor Jones, [[spoiler: though the Mayor is not really Fred's father, he still raised him as such.]] [[CharacterDevelopment He gets over it,]] though his obliviousness continues to shine in other respects.

* Discussed in ''WesternAnimatio/IceAge3DawnOfTheDinosaurs'':

* ''Manga/JojosBizarreAdventure'''s third protagonist, Jotaro Kujo falls firmly into this with his being TheStoic. He loves his family and friends, but that doesn't stop him from being incredibly averse to affection (giving or showing). This gets deconstructed in Part 6, however. You know what happens when you keep being an emotional brick wall that doesn't smile, cry or hug your children, even if you love them? Said children grow up to resent you.

* In ''ScoobyDooMysteryIncorporated'', a large portion of Freddy's ObliviousToLove status stems from his mistaken belief in this trope and like Hank above, was due to his father, Mayor Jones, [[spoiler: though the Mayor is not really Fred's father, he still raised him as such.]][[CharacterDevelopment He gets over it,]] though his obliviousness continues to shine in other respects.

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* Zigzagged in spades in ''{{Manga/Berserk}}''. The main male characters, Guts and Griffith, can be described as ambitious, ruthless, {{Jerk Ass}}es, [[MenAreUncultured uncultured]] in the case of Guts, and a monster in the case of Griffith ([[HeWhoFightsMonsters and almost with Guts]]), but one thing for sure is that they're '''not''' afraid to talk about their feelings in very [[WarriorPoet poetic manners]], especially to one another ([[HoYay making certain implications arise]]). In the case of Guts, he can switch from being [[http://www.mangakong.com/manga/Berserk/037.047/210 a gruff jerk]] to being [[http://www.mangakong.com/manga/Berserk/037.047/211 very tender]] [[http://www.mangakong.com/manga/Berserk/037.047/212 and caring]].
* ''Manga/RanmaOneHalf'': Played straight with Ranma and his father, Genma. They never hug or tell each other that they care; they very rarely have personal talks. The thought of getting parental affection from his dad is so weird to Ranma that Genma once used an attack against him that consisted only of an overly affectionate hug, which totally freaked him out. Growing up with the Real Men Hate Affection mindset could explain why he [[HatesBeingTouched doesn't really like being touched]] and seems to only have love/hate relationships with the people he's closest to. (i.e. [[ThreeAmigos Ryoga, Akane,]] etc.)
* Interestingly inverted in ''Manga/DeathNote'', where [[VillainProtagonist Light Yagami]]'s hatred of ''female'' affection cements his status as AmbiguouslyGay. A SerialKiller BadassGay, but gay nonetheless.

* In ''Film/TheHotChick'', the eponymous hot chick's boyfriend describes his feelings for her to a friend, expecting a similar confession from the friend, who calls him [[YouFailLogicForever gay]].

-->Actually, pursuing a woman you have heterosexual feelings for... not gay.
* The two ''Film/BillAndTed'' movies both have moments where the boys respond to a display of male affection with "Fag!" In the first, it follows a ManHug between the boys when it turned out that Ted wasn't killed by an evil knight. In the second, the boys say it to their evil robot duplicates to try and stave off death; the robots deliver the line, then [[DisneyDeath throw them off]] KirksRock anyway.

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* Inverted in ''Literature/ABrothersPrice''; Eldest Whistler explains to Jerin that she doesn't blame him for being too trusting, as that's how boys are brought up - she notes that his little brother would allow himself to be hugged by a stranger, while the girls would check for weapons, first. Due to male GenderRarityValue, boys are sheltered and cuddled and spoiled, which makes them much more prone to displays of affection than the girls (who are brought up to be able to defend themselves and their brothers).
* In ''Literature/{{Hurog}}'', Ward has an emotional scene with his brother Tosten, and lampshades this trope by pointing out that, thanks to his father (who was an affection-hating real man) he still isn't able to properly show affection to his brother. Averted in other parts of the series, he's very affectionate towards his sister, Ciarra, and occasionally shows his caring side when Oreg is having one of his PTSD-moments.

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* Dave and Dirk Strider in ''WebComic/{{Homestuck}}'' both attempt to maintain their "cool stoic badass" personas by avoiding any open demonstrations of affection. When Dave finally gives in to his emotions and hugs Dirk, he apologizes repeatedly and calls it "fucked up" (Dirk agrees that it's fucked up, but hugs him back anyway).
* PlayedForLaughs in ''Webcomic/BusterWildeWeerwolf'' when [[http://www.furnation.com/BusterWilde/comics/buster022.gif Hector is slightly disgusted]] by Buster and Gordon's over-the-top reconcilation after Gordon slapped Buster.

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* On TheSimpsons episode "Bart the Genius," Bart is shocked when Homer kisses him.

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* ''Series/ICarly'': The Father and son talk variant is inverted in an episode. Spencer and Carly are both visibly uncomfortable as Spencer tries to give Carly TheTalk.

* ''Series/MyNameIsEarl'': Earl and Randy, despite being unusually close to each other, are embarrassed by the thought of saying "I love you" to each other.

* There is a scene in ''Series/{{Merlin}}'' which fits this trope to a tee: Merlin and Arthur have a FriendshipMoment, and Merlin moves to hug Arthur, feeling it was the logical follow-up. Arthur doesn't quite see it that way. After an awkward moment, Arthur rolls his eyes and leaves. Merlin just smiles.

* The Father and son talk variant is inverted in an episode of ''Series/ICarly''. Spencer and Carly are both visibly uncomfortable as Spencer tries to give Carly TheTalk.
-->'''Carly:''' We are not having this conversation.\\
'''Spencer''' ''(clearly relieved)'': Thank God!
* Averted in ''Series/HowIMetYourMother'' with Marshall. He is very affectionate and emotional, and he tells his father everything, literally.
** Also averted with Barney. He tells anyone who will listen that [[InsistentTerminology he is Ted's best friend]] (despite all the evidence that points to Marshall having that role), and he and Marshall at one point get into an argument over [[ItMakesSenseInContext which one of them Ted would be most likely to have a gay dream about.]]
* ''Series/{{Friends}}'' also averted this with Chandler and Joey who were very close, ''did'' talk about their feelings and often engaged in hugging. Chandler even lampshades this trope, joking "Do you think we do this too much?" but they rarely let it bother them.
* Kirk and Spock's complete aversion of this trope in ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'' led to the creation of the first {{Slash Fic}}s. Particularly interesting since Vulcans dislike showing emotion in general, so Spock's obvious affection for Kirk effectively breaks two sets of social rules.
** That said, Spock does try to exhibit some propriety on occasion. For example, after having saved Kirk's life by taking control of a Klingon warship, Kirk goes in for the ManHug...
--> '''Spock''': Please Captain, not in front of the Klingons.
* In ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'', Dean Winchester often acts like this, rather to Sam's annoyance. Mostly because Sam is more straightforward about his emotions, whereas Dean is notorious for wallowing in {{Mangst}} and then denying it.
* In ''Series/That70sShow'', Red and Hyde both hate to express any kind of affection. Hyde actually denies even having feelings.
* Ray in ''Series/EverybodyLovesRaymond.'' In one episode he seems ''incapable'' of understanding his wife's need for affection, almost convinced she does it [[ItsAllAboutMe just to annoy him.]] He even states that [[NoTrueScotsman no man]] enjoys cuddling, they only put up with it to [[AllMenArePerverts get sex.]]

* Addressed more than once on ''Series/HomeImprovement'', as it tackles a lot of "man stuff".
** In general, Al and Tim are a SensitiveGuyAndManlyMan, and Tim is occasionally put off by Al's shows of affection. For instance, after he sticks up for Al and keeps him from being fired:
-->'''Tim:''' Oohhh, you're getting that "I'm going to hug you" look; I ''don't'' like that, Al!
-->'''Al:''' Just a little one!
-->'''Tim:''' No, Al, I-- ''[Al [[TheGlomp glomps]] him]'' AAAA! You're fired!
-->'''Al:''' I am not, you big friend, you!
** On the other hand, Tim isn't afraid of showing some affection himself. One episode is driven by the fact that his son Brad is embarrassed by Tim telling him "I love you" in front of his friends.
** Then there's the episode where Tim's boss and friend Mr. Binford dies. Both Al and Tim's wife Jill get on his case for not mourning openly, while Tim wonders why it's a big deal if he doesn't turn on the waterworks like they do. At the same time, Brad compliments him for taking the loss "like a real man" and not crying, which bothers Tim greatly:
--->'''Brad:''' You don't let stuff get to you.
--->'''Tim:''' Stuff gets to me!
--->'''Brad:''' Well, the great part about it is, no one can tell.
* ''Series/MyNameIsEarl'': Earl and Randy, despite being unusually close to each other, are embarrassed by the thought of saying "I love you" to each other.
* ''Series/TheFreshPrinceOfBelAir'': Anytime Carlton wants to hug Will, or even spend time talking to one another. Carlton is all for it, while Will puts on his Manly Face and bears it.
** Occasionally inverted. In the episode where Will gets shot he asks Carlton to give him a hug and Carlton is reluctant to do it. Possibly because[[spoiler: Carlton started carrying a gun and didn't want Will to see it.]]
* One season 1 ''Series/{{CSINY}}'' ep has the group questioning someone at a 'cuddle party'. Danny makes it clear that he does not cuddle. (although it's quite likely that's changed by now, between Lindsay and Lucy lol)
* Strongly averted in the new ''Series/HawaiiFive0''. Steve and Danny talk about feelings so much, hug enough and, in one instance, ''cuddle on a couch'', that they are well across the line into HoYay. Despite otherwise being really {{Badass}} action guys.
* Done in ''Series/DrakeAndJosh'', despite the two being brothers, they are too embarrassed to hug in public, so whenever they share a tender moment, they will give each others a "quick hug" which involves wrapping their arms around each other for a split second and then looking away.
** In private, though? Totally averted.
-->'''HUG ME BRUTHA!'''
* One subplot of the ''Series/{{Scrubs}}'' episode "My Half Acre" had Dr. Cox refusing to kiss his young son Jack and Jack's mother Jordan complaining about it. Perry confides to Carla that he worries about not being able to be an affectionate enough parent, though he does kiss Jack at the end of the episode. [[FridgeBrilliance Considering]] the relationship Perry had with his own father, a [[DomesticAbuser violent and abusive]] {{Alcoholic| Parent}}, it makes sense.
* In ''Series/AllInTheFamily'', Archie hates showing affection, and is disgusted by Mike and Gloria for doing so.
-->'''Gloria:''' You know, Daddy, that's the trouble with your whole generation! You're afraid to show affection openly.
-->'''Archie:''' We ain't afraid the show affection openly! We believe in showing it openly where it belongs, behind closed doors!

This is a relatively recent trope, and of varying geographical distribution. Until around the eighteenth century, it was expected of "men of sensibility"[[labelnote:*]]until some time in the 19th century, "sensibility" meant something rather more like what we would call "sensitivity"[[/labelnote]] to show their emotions much more openly (as in The Song Of Roland, in which the heroic French weep and faint away in groups of twenty thousand at a time). Even PDA between males was much more common as little as a hundred and fifty years ago, though generally more restrained in Anglophone countries (with their Puritan traditions) than elsewhere. (19th century English diarists record their horror at seeing male Frenchmen and Germans kissing each other on the mouth, though this gesture had been actually more common among all genders in England than elsewhere up to the time of the Civil Wars.)

See also ManHug, AccidentalHug, MenDontCry, RatedMForManly, AllTheGoodMenAreGay, HoYay.

* Averted in Disney/{{Aladdin}}, the (arguably) most important relationship in the film is between Aladdin and Genie, two male characters. They are often shown talking about their feelings and hug multiple times, all while averting the trappings of HoYay, and neither coming off as unmanly.

* One season 1 ''{{CSI NY}}'' ep has the group questioning someone at a 'cuddle party'. Danny makes it clear that he does not cuddle. (although it's quite likely that's changed by now, between Lindsay and Lucy lol)

* ''{{Friends}}'' also averted this with Chandler and Joey who were very close, ''did'' talk about their feelings and often engaged in hugging. Chandler even lampshades this trope, joking "Do you think we do this too much?" but they rarely let it bother them.

* In ''That70sShow'', Red and Hyde both hate to express any kind of affection. Hyde actually denies even having feelings.
* Ray in ''EverybodyLovesRaymond.'' In one episode he seems ''incapable'' of understanding his wife's need for affection, almost convinced she does it [[ItsAllAboutMe just to annoy him.]] He even states that [[NoTrueScotsman no man]] enjoys cuddling, they only put up with it to [[AllMenArePerverts get sex.]]
* In ''TheOffice'', Jim [[spoiler: post marriage to Pam]] gets mocked by Dwight for openly showing affection.

* Addressed more than once on ''HomeImprovement'', as it tackles a lot of "man stuff".

Also, don't expect teenage boys to be sensitive even with their own fathers. After a rare personal talk, no matter how short, always expect an awkward silence followed by a throat clearing, and a quick mumble of "I gotta go" or "that was a good talk, son". You can also expect lots of nervous hand shakes, but never a hug, [[ManHug at least not any longer than three seconds]]. This is a ''huge'' DoubleStandard, as it implies that men who show affection are weak, but it is normal for women to be affectionate.

-->--'''Cotton Hill'''[[hottip:*:to ''his son'' Hank]], ''WesternAnimation/KingOfTheHill''

See also ManHug, AccidentalHug, MenDontCry, RatedMForManly, AllTheGoodMenAreGay, HoYay. Contrast {{Asexuality}}.

* ''RanmaOneHalf'': Played straight with Ranma and his father, Genma. They never hug or tell each other that they care; they very rarely have personal talks. The thought of getting parental affection from his dad is so weird to Ranma that Genma once used an attack against him that consisted only of an overly affectionate hug, which totally freaked him out. Growing up with the Real Men Hate Affection mindset could explain why he [[HatesBeingTouched doesn't really like being touched]] and seems to only have love/hate relationships with the people he's closest to. (i.e. [[ThreeAmigos Ryoga, Akane,]] etc.)

* Mentioned in ''WesternAnimatio/IceAge3DawnOfTheDinosaurs'':

** And then he later subverts it when weeping bitterly after [[spoiler:the homeless man continually dies after Phil's repeated attempts to save him.]]