History Main / InanimateCompetitor

* Shortly after British Prime Minister UsefulNotes/LizTruss came into power in September 2022, her government released a disastrous mini-budget that trashed the British economy and required a comprehensive backflip in a timespan that ''Magazine/TheEconomist'' compared to "the shelf-life of a lettuce". In mid-October, with Truss' government sinking into further disrepute, the ''[[UsefulNotes/BritishNewspapers Daily Star]]'' tabloid took this idea and ran with it, live-streaming a head of lettuce and asking if it would wilt before Truss would be forced to resign. Six days later, the lettuce won.

* In one episode of ''WesternAnimation/RubyGloom'', Poe is seen fencing against someone who's just offscreen, their swords clashing together. His opponent turns out to be Mr. Buns, the stuffed rabbit. The second Mr. Buns is onscreen, the sword he was apparently wielding clatters to the floor as he just sits there, by all appearances an inanimate toy.

* Of a sort in ''Literature/TheStormlightArchive''. Early in ''Words of Radiance'', Shallan attempts to [[ItMakesSenseInContext convince a stick that it could become fire, only for the stick to obstinately refuse and reply with "I am a stick."]] Ever after when seeing the memory of the event from her point of view, it always is referred to as a battle against the stick that Shallan lost.

** The "Face the Press" sketch is a debate between the Minister for Home Affairs and a small patch of brown liquid "which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing."

** In "Montage," One of Strong Bad's montages is about [[TrainingMontage a wagon full of pancakes training for the "championship" against Homestar Runner.]] [[spoiler:The wagon full of pancakes manages to beat Homestar in one hit.]]

** In another episode, the original [[PointyHairedBoss]] loses at least two games of chess to a ''pineapple''. This had received some [[Foreshadowing]] earlier in the same episode when [[BlueCollarWarlock The World's Smartest Garbageman]] [[ItMakesAsMuchSenseInContext made an offhand comment about the intelligence differences between pineapples and bananas]].

** In "Unfair Science Fair" Doofenshmirtz's latest FreudianExcuse is that as a child he kept losing science fairs to competitors who had built baking soda volcanoes. He eventually gave up on science and decided to dedicate his life to poetry, only to lose a poetry contest to a baking soda volcano in an ArtsyBeret.

** In episode "[[Recap/TheSimpsonsS5E15DeepSpaceHomer Deep Space Homer]]", Homer is sure he's going to get the "Worker of the Week" award because he's the only person in the power plant who hasn't received the honor at least once already (and union rules say everyone has to win at least once), but instead it's given to an inanimate carbon rod. At the end of the episode, Homer uses the rod to hold the broken space shuttle door to allow a safe atmospheric re-entry and landing, saving the lives of the entire crew. A parade is given to the hero of the space mission... the carbon rod. Bart is a fan of the rod.

* In the ''WesternAnimation/WanderOverYonder'' episode "The Bounty," Lord Hater hires three bounty hunters to capture Wander and Sylvia, one of whom is a potted plant. To [[TheDragon Commander Peepers]], who's repeatedly failed at the same task, this is the unkindest cut of all. [[spoiler:[[SubvertedTrope Turns out]] it's not only alive but a ManEatingPlant to boot.]]

'''Hater:''' Well, he can't possibly be worse at it than ''you,'' can he?

** In another episode, the original [[PointyHairedBoss]] loses at least two games of chess to a ''pineapple''. This was [[Foreshadowing foreshadowed]] earlier in the same episode when [[BlueCollarWarlock the world's smartest garbageman]] [[ItMakesAsMuchSenseInContext made an offhand comment about the intelligence differences between pineapples and bananas]].

** In another episode, the original [[PointyHairedBoss]] loses at least two games of chess to a ''pineapple''. This was [[Foreshadowing|foreshadowed]] earlier in the same episode when [[BlueCollarWarlock the world's smartest garbageman]] [[ItMakesAsMuchSenseInContext made an offhand comment about the intelligence differences between pineapples and bananas]].

** In another episode, the original [[PointyHairedBoss]] loses at least two games of chess to a ''pineapple''. This was [[Foreshadowing|foreshadowed]] earlier in the same episode when [[BlueCollarWarlock|the world's smartest garbageman]] [[ItMakesAsMuchSenseInContext|made an offhand comment about the intelligence differences between pineapples and bananas]].

** In episode "[[Recap/TheSimpsonsS5E15DeepSpaceHomer Deep Space Homer]]", Homer is sure he's going to get Employee of the Month because he's the only person in the power plant who hasn't received the honor at least once already, but instead it's given to an inanimate carbon rod. At the end of the episode, Homer uses the rod to hold the broken space shuttle door to allow a safe atmospheric re-entry and landing, saving the lives of the entire crew. A parade is given to the hero of the space mission... the carbon rod.

** In episode "Deep Space Homer", Homer is sure he's going to get Employee of the Month because he's the only person in the power plant who hasn't received the honor at least once already, but instead it's given to an inanimate carbon rod. At the end of the episode, Homer uses the rod to hold the broken space shuttle door to allow a safe atmospheric re-entry and landing, saving the lives of the entire crew. A parade is given to the hero of the space mission... the carbon rod.
** In the much later episode "C.E.D'oh", a [[FreezeFrameBonus brief glimpse]] of the power plant's org chart reveals that the inanimate carbon rod is Homer's immediate superior.

* Inverted by the ''MTV Movie Awards'' in 1992. Before going to commercial, there was a joke category called "Best Performance By an Inanimate Object". One of the nominees: Music/VanillaIce [[TakeThat in]] ''Film/CoolAsIce''.
* In one episode of ''Series/{{Telefrancais}}'', Jacques and Sophie participate in a SpellingBee, along with their pineapple friend Ananas, who serves as their mascot. When the match ends in a tie, it is called for the mascots to face off in a tiebreaker round, which Ananas wins because the other team’s mascot is a teddy bear.

* ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'': In "The Great Snail Race", Patrick enters a rock named Rocky into the titular race. [[spoiler:Gary ends up crashing and Squidward's snail abandons the race to help him. While everyone was looking at those two, [[OffscreenRealityWarp Rocky had somehow crossed the finish line]]]]. Squidward's reaction provides the page quote.

-->'''Peepers:''' You hired a plant to do ''my'' job?!
-->'''Hater:''' Well, he can't possibly be worse at it than ''you,'' can he?

-> ''I can't believe it. My purebred, which cost me $1,700... lost to a rock.''
-->-- '''Squidward Tentacles''', "The Great Snail Race", ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants''

** Partway through the 127th Annual {{Upper Class Twit}} of the Year Show, crowd favorite Oliver St. John-Mollusc somehow manages to [[TooDumbToLive run himself over]] with his own car. This does not automatically disqualify him. [[spoiler: However, it does put him at the disadvantage of coming last.]]

* ''Series/NightCourt'': Dan Fielding once took part in a local election, and his competitor died. [[spoiler: Despite this, Dan still lost the election.]]

* ''VideoGame/DayOfTheTentacle'': One puzzle in the future section requires the player to enter Cousin Ted Edison (a mummy) in a beauty contest. [[spoiler: Once the player has dolled up Ted and [[RemovingTheRival had another contestant eliminated]], Ted wins.]]

* ''WebAnimation/RedVsBlue'': In season four, Sarge holds a competition to choose his new second in command. Since Simmons defected to the blue Team, Lopez is out of commission and Grif is, well, [[ButtMonkey Grif]], Donut assumes that the position is his by default, until Sarge adds two new competitors: a wrench and a mysterious skull of unknown origin. [[spoiler: Despite some genuine competition, Donut wins anyway.]]

** In "Montage," One of Strong Bad's montages is about [[TrainingMontage a wagon full of pancakes training for the "championship" against Homestar Runner.]] [[spoiler: The wagon full of pancakes manages to beat Homestar in one hit.]]
** In "Pet Show", Strong Bad enters The Cheat in... well, guess. The other competitors include Marzipan, who has entered the AmbiguouslyHuman Homestar Runner, Pom Pom, who has entered his [[CompanionCube dog-shaped cookie jar Trivia Time]], and the King of Town, who has entered a low-fat grill. The final scores are as follows: [[spoiler: Pom Pom and Trivia Time: 3.5. King of Town and Low-Fat Grill: Not supposed to be here! Marzipan and Homestar: 8.5. Strong Bad and The Cheat: Disqualified for "flagrant use of relish-foot".]]

* In an ancient example, Arrhichius of Philgaia, a 3 time Olympic pankration champion defended his title as absolute top dog one last time when he got choked to death but forced his opponent to surrender by breaking his foot before he died. By the time the opponent conceded, however, Arrhichius was already dead. Following the rules of the sport, Arrhichius' corpse was crowned champion.

* Several indie promotions have held "invisible man" matches, where the talent essentially wrestles alone, which reached it's apex in 2019 with [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cslu7zFmPjM "Invisible Man vs. Invisible Stan"]].

** [[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-1679 SCP-1679]] is a town whose mayor (SCP-1679-1) is a corpse that all of the town's inhabitants as wells as most outsiders perceive as alive and is currently serving his sixth term.

* ''Website/SCPFoundation'': [[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1370 SCP-1370,]] an [[AIIsACrapshoot insane]] but ultimately {{harmless|Villain}} robot which constantly attempts (and utterly fails) to battle any sapient being it encounters, was once tricked by Foundation staff into trying to fight a potted plant. No, not another SCP, an ordinary, non-anomalous potted plant. The plant won.

** [=DDT=] also famously has a roster member named "Yoshihiko", who is [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybFjynJvfzY actually a blow-up doll.]]

* ''WesternAnimation/{{Dilbert}}'': During a company-wide charity drive, the company chooses its three most worthless employees to go around the building and compete to see who can raise the most money. The three competitors are [[TheSlacker Wally]], a dead guy who was found in the stairwell, and the dead guy's chair, which is given the name "Ronald".

* In ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' episode "Deep Space Homer", Homer is sure he's going to get Employee of the Month because he's the only person in the power plant who hasn't received the honor at least once already, but instead it's given to an inanimate carbon rod.
** At the end of the episode, Homer uses the rod to hold the broken space shuttle door to allow a safe atmospheric re-entry and landing, saving the lives of the entire crew. A parade is given to the hero of the space mission... the carbon rod.

* In a strange meta example, the first [[https://chainsaw-man.fandom.com/wiki/Popularity_Polls popularity poll]] for ''Manga/ChainsawMan'' had Kobeni's car[[labelnote:*]]Which Power [[spoiler:accidentally killed an assassin]] with[[/labelnote]] as an option, and it managed to take 7th place. [[ButtMonkey Kobeni herself ranked 8th.]] The second poll included several more inanimate objects, including Power's [[FakeBoobs breast pads]], Aki's cigarette, and the grilled meat [[spoiler:made from Makima's corpse]]. The latter ranked the highest (right above Kobeni's car) at 14th place. [[https://www.viz.com/blog/posts/chainsaw-man-popularity-poll-results-august-2022 The poll for English fans]] made the car the only object as an option. Even though Kobeni was elevated all the way to fifth place, her car was once again just above her!

* ''Wiki/SCPFoundation'': [[http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1370 SCP-1370,]] an [[AIIsACrapshoot insane]] but ultimately {{harmless|Villain}} robot which constantly attempts (and utterly fails) to battle any sapient being it encounters, was once tricked by Foundation staff into trying to fight a potted plant. No, not another SCP, an ordinary, non-anomalous potted plant. The plant won.

* ''Machinima/RedVsBlue'': In season four, Sarge holds a competition to choose his new second in command. Since Simmons defected to the blue Team, Lopez is out of commission and Grif is, well, [[ButtMonkey Grif]], Donut assumes that the position is his by default, until Sarge adds two new competitors: a wrench and a mysterious skull of unknown origin. [[spoiler: Despite some genuine competition, Donut wins anyway.]]

* In a strange meta example, the first [[https://chainsaw-man.fandom.com/wiki/Popularity_Polls popularity poll]] for ''Manga/ChainsawMan'' had Kobeni's car[[labelnote:*]]Which Power [[spoiler:accidentally killed an assassin]] with[[/labelnote]] as an option, and it managed to take 7th place. [[ButtMonkey Kobeni herself ranked 8th.]] The second poll included several more inanimate objects, including Power's [[FakeBoobs breast pads]], Aki's cigarette, and the grilled meat [[spoiler:made from Makima's corpse]]. The latter ranked the highest (right above Kobeni's car) at 14th place. The poll for English fans made the car the only object as an option. Even though Kobeni was elevated all the way to fifth place, her car was once again just above her!

* In a strange meta example, the first [[https://chainsaw-man.fandom.com/wiki/Popularity_Polls popularity poll]] for ''Manga/ChainsawMan'' had Kobeni's car[[labelnote:*]]Which Power [[spoiler:accidentally killed an assassin]] with[[/labelnote]] as an option, and it managed to take 7th place. [[ButtMonkey Kobeni herself ranked 8th.]] The second poll included several more inanimate objects, including Power's [[FakeBoobs breast pads]], Aki's cigarette, and the grilled meat [[spoiler:made from Makima's corpse]]. The latter ranked the highest (right above Kobeni's car) at 14th place.