History Main / HandsOffParenting

* In ''Film/LetMeIn'', Owen's mother is clearly completely detached from his life due her own alcoholism and despondency over her failed marriage. She is completely unaware that Owen is being physically and emotionally tortured by bullies every day at school and is developing psychological quirks at home due to his sheer loneliness. She thinks everything is just fine and dandy with him. Owen's father, meanwhile, hasn't even seen him for an undetermined amount of time and is also oblivious to his plight. It's an ironic point that Abby, a {{vampire}}, shows more genuine concern for Owen's well-being than either of his parents. It makes [[spoiler:Owen's decision to leave with Abby at the end of the film completely understandable]].

-->"Und vot did hyu learn, sveethot?" Gkika asked.

* ''ComicBook/BatmanTheDarkKnightReturns'': Carrie Kelly's parents are so hands-off that they're depicted as having trouble remembering she exists at all when she's not there. (Which is convenient for Creator/FrankMiller, since it allows him to completely bypass the question of how she's going to explain to them about her new career path.) It may have something to do with the way they're always surrounded by a haze of what is probably not tobacco smoke. There's also a reference to 'needles', suggesting that their presence in this trope may also be down to harder stuff...

* While it is a far cry from neglect, Manga/{{Yotsuba}} spends a lot of time unsupervised, considering that she's only five. Can be justified due to different culture values. Japanese children are allowed to go around unsupervised more commonly, usually when walking to school or taking the subway.

See also AdultsAreUseless, DisappearedDad, MissingMom, WhenYouComingHomeDad, FreeRangeChildren, HippieParents, MinorLivingAlone, ParentalAbandonment, and ParentalNeglect.

Might be a consequence of a parent who is AllergicToRoutine or DesperatelySeekingAPurposeInLife. Polar opposite of MeddlingParents, OverprotectiveDad and MyBelovedSmother.

* Yukino's parents in ''Manga/HohzukiIsland'' seemed to ignore her completely as a teenager, and barely acknowledged her walking around naked and declaring she's going to town [[spoiler: however that tiny acknowledgment is enough to show Yukino that her parents do care, and their relationship eventually improves - well, they still talk to each other anyway]]. Since they're shown in person (and thus not too busy with work) relaxing at home (with coffee, not drugs), it's probable that they're just leaving their daughter alone like they wanted their parents to when they were teens. Yukino's friend has [[AbusiveParents the opposite problem]] and is eventually ''jailed'' for being a neglectful mother.

* While [[ManipulativeBitch Granny Hina]] insists that she's helping the tenants at the Hinata Inn, much of ''FanFic/AnAlternateKeitaroUrashima'' revolves around [[DeconstructionFic showing the consequences]] of her inaction. Rather than addressing their various neuroses, she gives them a place to stay where they don't have to deal with the consequences of their actions. When others don't show them the same leniency, she teaches them to [[NeverMyFault blame everyone but themselves]], and complains incessently when ''she'' has to deal with the fallout as well. She doesn't appreciate [[CallingTheOldManOut having this pointed out]], or getting taken to task for [[spoiler:pawning her duties off on Haruka instead and continuing her World Tour]].

* In ''Film/LetMeIn'', Owen's mother is clearly completely detached from his life due her own alcoholism and despondency over her failed marriage. She is completely unaware that Owen is being physically and emotionally tortured by bullies every day at school and is developing psychological quirks at home due to his sheer loneliness. She thinks everything is just fine and dandy with him. Owen's father, meanwhile, hasn't even seen him for an undetermined amount of time and is also oblivious to his plight. It's an ironic point that Abby, a {{vampire}}, shows more genuine concern for Owen's well-being than either of his parents. It makes [[spoiler:Owen's decision to leave with Abby at the end of the film completely understandable.]]

* In ''Film/IndianaJonesAndTheLastCrusade'', Dr. Henry Jones Sr. tells his son that he deliberately adopted this parenting style in reaction against his own strict upbringing and is astonished when Henry Jr. (aka [[Franchise/IndianaJones Indiana Jones]]) makes it clear he did NOT appreciate it.

** Of course, this is probably for the best for Brooke, given that her parents are both [[{{Jerkass}} jackasses]] to a point where her mother's treatment of her could qualify as [[AbusiveParents emotional abuse]]. (Which is bad enough that Brooke actually believes that her own mother ordered the violent beating she got in season six.)

Mob's parents in the ''Manga/MobPsycho100'' gender swap fanfic ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13226631/1/Shigeko-Kageyama-AKA-Mob Shigeko Kageyama AKA Mob]]''. As a girl Mob faces more scrutiny from her mother and she can't measure up. Her mother is both ashamed of how strange her daughter is and afraid of her because of her powers. Early in the store Mob's mother reaches her breaking point when she catches Mob and Ritsu fighting and she vents her frustrations at Mob. Mob then decides to run away from home and live with Reigen, a man that they have only met once before. As of the latest chapter her parents still have no intention of telling their daughter to come back home, or to parent Mob in any way, even after many people on the internet begin to speculate that Reigen's relationship with Mob may be inappropriate.

* Sadly, quite common amongst parents who feel that their own parents were too strict with them as a kid and thus will stand around whilst their children cause havoc in stores. Kids who don't learn to respect authority or that actions have consequences very commonly get in trouble with the law when they get older, with the parents often utterly surprised.

* In the pilot of the sitcom ''{{Abbys}}, bar regular Beth brings a dartboard in because she got it for her sons but they just started throwing darts at each other. Later in the episode she talks about being freaked out that they expect her to hug them and make them food.

See also AdultsAreUseless, DisappearedDad, MissingMom, [[WhenYouComingHomeDad When You Coming Home, Dad?]], FreeRangeChildren, MinorLivingAlone, ParentalAbandonment, and ParentalNeglect.

[[folder:Comics]]

* ''Comicbook/BatmanTheDarkKnightReturns'': Carrie Kelly's parents are so hands-off that they're depicted as having trouble remembering she exists at all when she's not there. (Which is convenient for Creator/FrankMiller, since it allows him to completely bypass the question of how she's going to explain to them about her new career path.) It may have something to do with the way they're always surrounded by a haze of what is probably not tobacco smoke. There's also a reference to 'needles', suggesting that their presence in this trope may also be down to harder stuff...

[[folder:Live Action TV]]

* ''VideoGame/{{Earthbound}}'': Ness' parents are surprisingly cool with their little boy heading out to fight monsters on his own without any form of escort or weaponry. They just like it when Ness calls them every once in a while to say hi. They also are just as cool with giving Ness hundreds and thousands of dollars as allowance.

* ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'' has Toph who adopted this parenting strategy, partly in response to [[OverprotectiveDad her own upbringing]] and partly due to a demanding career. Unfortunately, she went too far in that direction leading to a myriad of issues in her children. Lin assumed responsibility from a very young age (as a teenager she was Suyin's father figure essentially) while Suyin rebelled and fell in with the Triads. Her two daughters ended up estranged with her and each other for over 30 years until they finally reconciled.

* Sadly, quite common amongst parents who feel that their own parents were too strict with them as a kid and thus will stand around whilst their children cause havoc in stores. Kids who don't learn to respect authority or that actions have consequences very commonly get in trouble with the law, with the parents often utterly surprised.

* This parenting style is called permissive parenting.

* In the memoir ''Literature/TheGlassCastle'', Jean, Billy, Lorie, and Maureen have parents like this. Ditzy, artistic, neglectful to the point of borderline abuse, and so on. An interesting case, since this is implied to have a somewhat beneficial effect in the long run. The kids are incredibly self sufficient, helping each other survive their childhood, supporting themselves financially, and fleeing one by one to make a life for themselves in New York.

* Goo's parents from ''WesternAnimation/FostersHomeForImaginaryFriends'', who wouldn't stop her [[MrImagination imagining hundreds of imaginary friends]] because they didn't want to stunt her creativity, so they just foisted them all off on Fosters. And her name is 'Goo' because ''they let her name herself''.
** Her full name? "Goo Goo Ga Ga." Yes, they asked her when she was an infant.

* ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'' has Toph who adopted this parenting strategy, partly in response to her own upbringing and partly due to a demanding career. Unfortunately, she went too far in that direction leading to a myriad of issues in her children. Lin assumed responsibility from a very young age (as a teenager she was Suyin's father figure essentially) while Suyin rebelled and fell in with the Triads. Her two daughters ended up estranged with her and each other for over 30 years until they finally reconciled.

* This is what ComicBook/GreenArrow amounted to when he took in Roy Harper. While they spent plenty of time fighting bad guys together, out of costume Ollie barely had much of a presence around Roy and was somewhat oblivious to what was going on in Roy's life, including the crippling sense of abandonment and loneliness building up inside him that led to his heroin addiction.

* Manga/{{Noein}}: Haruka's parents are divorced and she lives with her mom, who's like this. She isn't spacy or detatched or self-involved, though, she's just really lazy, especially by stereotypical anime mom standards, and sleeps all the time.

* Masaomi Kida's parents in ''{{Anime/Durarara}}'' apparently take this view and seem entirely unconcerned about their son going out late at night, dropping out of high school (and before that [[spoiler:becoming a gang leader]]) to the point that his friend Mikado pulls a LampshadeHanging on it. Ironically of his three friends Masaomi is the only one whose parents are actually around, as Mikado's parents rent an apartment for him closer to his school and Anri's are dead, but you'd never know it by how he acts.

* In ''Film/LetMeIn'', Owen's mother is clearly completely detached from his life due her own alcoholism and despondency over her failed marriage. She is completely unaware that Owen is being physically and emotionally tortured by bullies every day at school and is developing psychological quirks at home due to his sheer loneliness. She thinks everything is just fine and dandy with him. Owen's father, meanwhile, hasn't even seen him for an undetermined amount of time and is also oblivious to his plight. It's an ironic point that Abby, a {{vampire}}, shows more genuine concern for Owen's well-being than either of his parents. It makes [[spoiler: Owen's decision to leave with Abby at the end of the film completely understandable.]]

** Excepting Joyce, were any of the teen characters' parents around outside of plot-relevant reasons? Cordy's parents were often mentioned but never seen. Oz's were never mentioned, nor were Zander's. The only adult figures of any parental importance who were around consistently were Giles, Joyce, and Wesley. And maybe the Mayor, if you consider him as a sort of evil father figure.

* ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'' has Toph who adopted this parenting strategy, partly in response to her own upbringing and partly due to a demanding career. Unfortunately, she went too far in that direction leading to a myriad of issues in her children. Lin assumed responsibility from a very young age (as a teenager she was Suyin's father figure essentially) while Suyin rebelled and fell in with the Triads. Her children ended up estranged for over 30 years until they finally reconciled.

* [=MudWings=] in ''Literature/WingsOfFire'' don't raise their dragonets. They mate in groups, so [[MamasBabyPapasMaybe almost no dragons know who sired their kids]], and then they leave their eggs alone. The first hatchling has a natural BigBrotherInstinct. The siblings work together as a SiblingTeam with their "[=BigWing=]" sibling as their leader. Clay, who was raised in a cave until he was almost an adult, is very disappointed. He always dreamed of coming back to a family who missed him. While, it turns out that Clay is a [=BigWing=] himself, he had hoped to find his parents. When he meets his mother, she barely takes note of him.

* [=MudWings=] in ''Literature/WingsOfFire'' don't raise their dragonets. They mate in groups, so [[MamasBabyFathersBaby almost no dragons know who sired their kids]], and then they leave their eggs alone. The first hatchling has a natural BigBrotherInstinct. The siblings work together as a SiblingTeam with their "[=BigWing=]" sibling as their leader.