History Main / CruelToBeKind

* ''Fanfic/AnchorFoal'': One of the reasons Princess Celestia has Fleur take on Fluttershy as a student is because Fleur isn't afraid to be ''ruthless'' when necessary. For instance, many ponies were [[TakingAdvantageOfGenerosity exploiting Fluttershy's kindness]] by refusing to pay their medical bills, leaving her impoverished. Fleur has no problems forcing these issues out into the open so they can be addressed.

* ''Fanfic/PersonaVReversingTheWheelOfFate'': The protagonists' Shadows push this trope to the breaking point, better resembling TheCorrupter. What they're ''trying'' to do with their constant taunts and insults is coerce their other selves into standing up to them and Awakening to their dormant power. But as in ''VideoGame/{{Persona4}}'', it's extremely hard to face yourself, and the Shadows go berserk when their other selves deny the truth. The most extreme examples thus far are Shiho's shadow forcing her suicide attempt when she was about to step down and Yusuke's shadow ruining his latest picture that Madarame was going to plagiarize.

* ''Literature/EndersGame'': Ender's entire journey through battle school, where he endures pure physical, emotional, social torture ends up making him an epic commander and thus saves all of humanity. For specific examples, he is intentionally set up to be ambushed by a bully and his gang in the showers...so he'll realize that no one will help him and he needs to come up with a solution, which ends with him killing the bully. He is manipulated with coerced letters from his sister Valentine, so he won't simply write off all of humanity being as bad as his brother Peter and will therefore kill the Buggers as needed. He is placed in games that have unfair rules set up against him (such as low preparation time, more enemies on the other side, etc.) so Ender will start thinking less in terms of how to follow the rules and more in terms of how to ''win'', which ends up helping him when he must participate in simulation [[spoiler:not!]] games where the Buggers have every advantage against him. There is a virtual reality game set up for him called the Giant's Drink that is intentionally designed to be impossible to win, so Ender will start looking for third options to screw the game over, [[spoiler:a sentiment which culminates in him bombing the Buggers out of existence and taking his own, actually real, soldiers out with them]].

[[folder:FanWorks]]
* ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12286952/33/And-Yet-Again-Still-Even-More-Fragments ADD Hyper]]'': Partially due to a spell, but Hinata decides to act on a bit of advice from Kurenai that not fighting her family at full strength is harmful to them by making them think they're stronger than they are. As a result, Hinata decides to "beat the weakness" out of her entire clan to make them stronger.
* ''Fanfic/ApotheosisMHA'': Deconstructed. All Might crushes Izuku's dreams of being a hero to protect a {{Muggle}} from a futile and dangerous path. It ended up massively backfiring on him as his well-meaning BrutalHonesty caused Izuku to despise him and everything All Might stands for. After a lifetime of discrimination and disappointment, All Might ends being the last straw that puts Izuku on a dark path.

** [[spoiler:When Bartholomew Kuma separates the Straw Hats from each other and sends them flying to different islands. Superficially this seems like a very cruel thing to do, but he actually (and intentionally) saved their lives. They were in a situation that they were very unlikely to escape alive, and even if they somehow did, they weren't ready for the New World yet. Kuma not only helps them escape, but by the time they reunite (two years later), they're ''much'' stronger and thus more likely to be able to make it in the New World.]]

** Doflamingo's brother Corazon is introduced in a flashback as a ChildHater, for example throwing a preteen Trafalgar Law out a window. It turns out he's awful to the kids who join the crew in an attempt to make them ''leave'' since he doesn't want kids working for his evil, manipulative brother.

* In ''VisualNovel/PhoenixWrightAceAttorneyJusticeForAll'', Moe the Clown brings Regina to Max's trial for her father's murder in order for her to see what her naive behavior had caused (Acro, the actual culprit, had attempted to murder her in grief-stricken retaliation for an accident she caused through a DeadlyPrank, which put his brother into an irreversible coma, and caused Acro himself to be confined to a wheelchair). Thankfully, despite (or possibly because) of the resulting mental breakdown, the plan works.

* ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'': Bella deliberately picks a fight with her dad, using some of the same words that her mother did when she left him, before storming out of the house, so that James won't go to her house and kill her dad.

* ''LightNovel/FullMetalPanic'': In the ''Overload'' manga, Sousuke agrees to help Kaname get into shape for swimsuit season ...and puts her in a [[PoweredArmor Bonta-kun]] suit that forces her to exercise until the point of exhaustion. Sousuke eventually reveals that he was trying to teach Kaname to exercise in moderation, since her original fitness regimen (before he offered to help) was dangerously unhealthy, including outright skipping meals.

* ''LightNovel/{{Maoyu}}'': In episode 2, after finding two runaway girls, the Head Maid tells the Demon King and Hero that she always reported runaway serfs in the past. The Demon King orders her to feed them and clothe them anyway. Later the Head Maid tells the girls that she despises insects. The Hero thinks she's being incredibly cruel to them, but after a few dialogue exchanges, he begins to see that the Head Maid is actually trying to help them, and hires them to be live-in maids to help around the mansion.

* In ''LightNovel/WorldBreakAriaOfCurseForAHolySwordsman'', Urushibara does this to help snap Satsuki out of her HeroicBSOD after she loses a practice match and gets humiliated in it. First she steals the fries on Satsuki's plate, claiming they'd go to waste when she says she's not hungry. Then she teases Moroha a bit in front of her. Though Moroha found her methods crude, he thanks Urushibara for helping Satsuki out of her slump.

* In ''WesternAnimation/TheIncredibles'', Mr. Incredible is actually quite reasonable when refusing Buddy as a sidekick. He apparently has given the kid merchandise for months, as thanks for him being a fan, while saying that he doesn't work with kids. Why? Because it's dangerous. When Buddy thwarts his attempts to stop Bomb Voyage by being oblivious to the danger he put himself in, Mr. Incredible saves his life and tells the cops to take Buddy home to his parents after stopping a runaway train. He's trying to avoid being responsible for a child's death. Buddy never considered there was a reason for "the cruel" part and assumed Mr. Incredible was being a jerk.

*** In "[[Recap/StarTrekDeepSpaceNineS05E13SoldiersOfTheEmpire Soldiers Of The Empire]]", [[ChallengingTheChief Worf challenges General Martok for fleeing the Jem'hadar]]. As Martok had been badly affected by his experience as a Dominion prisoner, being challenged and defeating Worf restores Martok's fighting spirit and that of the demoralized crew. Once he realizes that Worf was trying to help him, Martok declares him a sworn brother of his House.

* ''Film/PoolOfLondon'' (1951): Near the end of the film, Dan (played by Bonar Colleano) abruptly brushes off his loyal sidekick Johnny (played by Earl Cameron). Johnny assumes it is for racial reasons but actually Dan realizes that he (Dan) is likely to be arrested and wants to distance Johnny from his problems.

* ''Literature/TheDollmaker1954'' has a scene where the title character slices open her child's throat with the knife she uses for whittling. She's hitched a ride with an Army general, and he's horrified, calling her a murderer -- but the child is choking to death from croup, and the Dollmaker cut his (her?) throat to bypass the obstructed part of the windpipe so the kid could breathe while they head for the hospital.
* ''Literature/EndersGame'': Ender's entire journey through battle school, where he endures pure physical, emotional, social torture ends up making him an epic commander and thus saves all of humanity. For specific examples, he is intentionally set up to be ambushed by a bully and his gang in the showers...so he'll realize that no one will help him and he needs to come up with a solution, which ends with him killing the bully. He is manipulated with coerced letters from his sister Valentine, so he won't simply write off all of humanity being as bad as his brother Peter and will therefore kill the Buggers as needed. He is placed in games that have unfair rules set up against him (such as low preparation time, more enemies on the other side, etc.) so Ender will start thinking less in terms of how to follow the rules and more in terms of how to ''win'', which ends up helping him when he must participate in simulation [[spoiler: not!]] games where the Buggers have every advantage against him. There is a virtual reality game set up for him called the Giant's Drink that is intentionally designed to be impossible to win, so Ender will start looking for third options to screw the game over, [[spoiler: a sentiment which culminates in him bombing the Buggers out of existence and taking his own, actually real, soldiers out with them]].

** [=McGonagall=] has a moment of this in the very first Harry Potter book. She catches Harry, Neville, Hermione, and Draco out of bed after hours and takes away ''one hundred and fifty points'', and from ''her own house'' at that! (She also takes twenty points from Draco, though, since he too had to be out of bed after-hours in order to even know what the other three were doing; there was no other way he could then have informed the professor about their rule-breaking.) Her reaction is justified when you consider: one, during this particular school year there was a lethal monster in the school in addition to Voldemort being after the stone, and ultimately [=McGonagall=] doesn't want the students to consider wandering around after-hours to be acceptable. Two, part of the reasons the Slytherins all come off as such jerks is because Snape plays favorites and never takes any points away from a Slytherin student, no matter how awful. [=McGonagall=]'s willingness to cost her own house the House Cup, by contrast, teaches the Gryffindor students that ethical behavior is determined by the choices you make, and not the groups to which you belong. Three, the students were willing to break rules was ''in part'' because Snape only ever punished Harry for breaking rules out of a personal vendetta, so the students understandably came to the conclusion that the rules couldn't be trusted. The fact that [=McGonagall=] had a legitimate reason to punish them ''and'' the fact that she punished Draco along with them (something Snape would never have done) drove home for the students the fact that just because one teacher is a jerk, doesn't mean they ''all'' are.

* In ''Literature/JeevesAndWooster'', Jeeves to Bertie. He snarks at Bertie, manipulates him, gives him the cold shoulder when he most wants sympathy, gets him into trouble, and destroys his stuff. Why? Because he cares.
* The Literature/InDeath series: Being a murder cop has this trope as part of Eve's job description. She has to interrogate witnesses, and pull no punches, even if said witnesses are her best friend and her aide's (later partner) brother. She has to tell families that one of their members is dead. There was one book where she had to tell this one person of interest to her face that [[spoiler: the man she had sex with was her birth father]], because she had to find out if she knew and if she murdered him. Another book had a person of interest saying about how terrible it must be for her to see only the worst in people. This is why being a cop can suck.
* ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles'':
** With all of the really scary magic out there, Harry Dresden generally knows which lines to toe and which to [[PyroManiac burn]]. Many less talented individuals ''don't'', so he pulls this trope during ''Literature/FoolMoon'' when he refuses to teach one about a certain kind of magical containment. He instructs her to drop it with no further explanation, knowing how dangerous it is, but a lack of communication about ''why'' she wanted to know about it (on both their parts) eventually [[spoiler:[[PoorCommunicationKills leads to her death]]]]
** Harry's godmother Lea, and Mab, '''Queen of Air and Darkness''', argue that wizard training must be this because that's the only way to get good enough to survive. Wizards can stand up to a lot of dangerous supernatural threats (as Harry himself shows), but it requires a lot of knowledge, skill, and preparation. So anything less than brutal training leaves them incorrectly thinking they're prepared, which is a major disservice. Harry teaches [[spoiler:Molly]] magical shields with snowballs, while he himself learned with baseballs, and Luccio, despite generally being a pretty nice person, taught Morgan to shield ''with rocks''. Lea teaches [[spoiler:Molly]] ''to fight by pitting her against real enemies''. Mab teaches [[spoiler:Harry Dresden, Winter Knight]] with months of highly lethal, very inventive surprise attacks.
* In ''Literature/TheFivePeopleYouMeetInHeaven'', UsefulNotes/WorldWarII veteran Eddie has suffered his entire life with his leg injury from the war. When he dies and goes to heaven, he meets five people, including his former captain in the army, called The Captain. The Captain reveals [[spoiler: that he was the one who shot him in the leg in the Philippines so that he wouldn't get burned alive trying to save a villager from a burning house.]]
* ''Literature/AChristmasCarol'' is built on this, with the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Yet To Come being harsh with Scrooge in order to save him from damnation.
* ''Literature/ImmortalsAfterDark'': Nix the Ever-Knowing often says, "Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind," when she's using her precognition to set up people, including her own sisters, to go through terrible ordeals that result in happy endings.
* In ''Literature/LordsOfTheUnderworld'', Ashlyn sees Maddox being stabbed by his friends and thinks that there can be [[MoralEventHorizon "no reason good enough"]] for what the attackers. In one respect, that's true, [[UnreliableNarrator but Ashlyn doesn't know]] about the curse Maddox is under: a curse that will compel Maddox to stab ''himself'' if no one else is willing to do it, so he dies and comes back to life each day. His friends were taking the [[MercyKill fastest]] and kindest option they could.
* In ''Literature/TheMentalState'', one of the tactics used by the protagonist to survive in prison is to try to reform as many inmates as possible. This means taking some extreme actions sometimes. However, the best example is probably the way he treats Officer Reed, an undercover cop trying to expose the prison drug addicts. After uncovering the truth about him, Zack tricks him into taking drugs himself and then blackmailing him so that he keeps taking them and enduring the humiliation the rest of the gang inflicts in him, essentially turning him into a junkie himself. He then reveals that this was simply his way of showing the officer how hard life is for addicts behind bars. Officer Reed then helps him to stage a coup and cut off the gang's drug supply, causing all the gang's members, including Officer Reed himself, to co cold turkey and curing them all. The officer realizes that Zack's method of reducing the use of drugs in prison was more successful than his own and starts to appreciate him more.

* ''Literature/BlueIguana'': While working with the Ble Iguana Recovery Program, Clarice is sometimes forced to do things that make her sick to her stomach, like trapping iguanas and holding them still for the ordeal of tagging them, but she knows it's for the survival of the species.

-->Just relax, struggling will only give you rope burn
-->You know my terms, they're simple yet you disobey my orders
-->I'd hate to see you hurt but how else will I ever get through to you?
-->All I want, yes, all I want is what is the very best for you

-->And you call me up again just to break me like a promise
-->So casually cruel in the name of being honest
-->I'm a crumpled up piece of paper lying here
-->'Cause I remember it all, all, all
-->Too well

* El Gallo, in the second act of ''Theatre/TheFantasticks''. "We all must die a bit before we grow again... I hurt them for that reason, and myself a little bit too."

* ''VideoGame/{{Slammed}}'': [[spoiler:This is what Super Horns thinks he/she's doing by betraying Solitary and pushing him off the scaffold before he can grab the title belt; Super Horns is convinced that Solitary has "spinal stenosis", a disease caused by damage to the spine that can lead to paralysis if left untreated, but Solitary refuses to let a doctor examine him for the disease, so Super Horns thinks if Solitary no longer has a title to defend, Solitary would have no choice but to get examined.]]
* In ''VideoGame/SonicRushAdventure'', Blaze coldly tells Marine that she's an annoying nuisance (which is not entirely unjustified) and that she'd be a burden to them because it would be to dangerous for her to come with them to [[BigBad Whisker's]] hideout and because Sonic and Tails don't have the guts to do it. The cutscene is even explicitly called "Cruel to Be Kind."
* In the [=PS2=] game ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyX'', Auron intentionally withholds crucial information from Tidus, telling him only what he needs to hear at each particular moment. [[spoiler: This is because the only way to "shock" the rest of the group into considering how pointless the sacrifice is involves Tidus learning at the last minute that the Final Summoning will kill Yuna, then Tidus responding to it emotionally by screaming at the rest of group asking why they didn't do or say anything about this before now; do they care about Yuna as a person at all?! Tidus is also a person who is cruel to be kind, although unintentionally in his case, because he is the outsider who questions what the rest of the group would rather avoid facing, to give the group the kick in the pants they need to dispense with the Final Summoning and figure out how to beat Sin for ''good''. Which was Auron's plan all along.]]
** Also, [[spoiler: It turns out Jecht, Tidus' father, made a failed attempt at this. He wanted to "show Tidus what it was like" at the top of the Blitzball championship. This is a laudable goal, but as Jecht himself acknowledges at the end of the game, his methods for achieving this goal were ''questionable'' at ''best'', they involved repeatedly mocking and insulting Tidus so that Tidus' resulting anger would push him to improve his skills. This technically worked, since Tidus became the star player of the Zanarkand Abes, but since Tidus didn't realize Jecht didn't actually mean what he was saying, Tidus grew up with a hatred of his father to match his increased blitzball skills.]]
* In the ''VideoGame/GalaxyAngel'' videogame trilogy, Ranpha Franboise can sometimes come off this way. There are several instances where Tact is having a problem with his chosen girlfriend, and Ranpha ends up verbally beating him over the head with an obvious solution. Tact himself can come off this way a few times, such as when [[spoiler: in Mint's route in Moonlit Lovers, he solves his conflict with Mint by barging into her room using his commander authority to open the door and forcing Mint to have a frank discussion with him that makes her extremely uncomfortable. It works; the discussion ends with them hugging romantically, their conflict over.]]
* Raz the [[PsychicPowers psychic]] hero of ''VideoGame/{{Psychonauts}}'' is terrified of his father, Augustus. As circus performers, Augustus trains Raz so harshly that the boy is convinced his father hates him for being psychic. The truth is that [[spoiler: all Raz's dad wanted was to instill discipline in his son so that his powers would not go to waste.]]
* In the second ''VideoGame/DotHackGU'' game, once free of [[spoiler:Sakaki's control]], Atoli falls apart and falls into a "ItsAllMyFault" [[HeroicBSOD spiral]]. Kuhn tries to reassure her that this is not the case, but to little effect. Haseo however, having been around her long enough to know that she's got cripplingly low self-esteem, resorts to another method. He [[GetAHoldOfYourselfMan slaps her in the face to get her attention]] then asks her how she intends to take responsibility. Seems cruel at first, but it works a lot better since it helps her focus on actually ''doing'' something rather than just wallowing in self-pity.
-->'''Endrance''': Kind words are not always kind once spoken.
* In ''VideoGame/TearsToTiara2'', Hamil attempts to get Tart to leave town. If she doesn't, she'll either be captured and burnt at the stake for calling herself a Goddess, or get caught up in a rebellion. It kind of backfires in that his harsh words lead to her capture.
* Subverted by the ''VideoGame/KingdomsOfAmalurReckoning'' Temple questline. There's a beggar guy ranting to everyone else in the slums about how society has failed them and there's no hope of changing their situation. He ''thinks'' he's being brutally honest, but the questgiver points out that he's encouraging the peasants to resign themselves to living in squalor and to resent other classes solely because they were born into better circumstances. This ties in with the game's overarching aesop of 'yes, life sucks- but it doesn't have to forever, so get up and do something'.

* In ''VideoGame/ProjectSekai'', the Insatiable Pale Color shows that since middle school, when Ena told her dad she wanted to become an artist like him, he'd told her that she doesn't have any talent for art and that she wouldn't get recognition. His reason is that knowing firsthand how lonely and gruelling the art industry is, and his daughter's personality, he believes it would only end in despair if she pursued art as a career.

* In ''VideoGame/DevilMayCry5'', Dante constantly tried to distance Nero from Urizen as much as possible, even calling Nero dead weight at one point to shoo him away and criticizing V's decision to involve Nero. It's later revealed Dante did all of this to prevent Nero from [[spoiler: unknowingly killing his own father, Urizen/Vergil, as Dante is all too familiar with living with that kind of guilt.]]
* In ''VideoGame/DwarfFortress'', a game known for its vast potentials for unwarranted cruelty, sometimes this has a reason. One incident arose where a dwarf was lying on the ground, suffering from internal bleeding, but none of the doctors would help him. The player, for fear of losing this dwarf, had to place a spike trap underneath him and activate it manually to cause external bleeding that the doctors would actually notice[[spoiler: which might seem like a roundabout solution to a simple problem, but what else can you do besides hope the noticeable injuries aren't life threatening?]]
* In ''VideoGame/KnightsOfTheOldRepublic'', one quest on Dantooine involves you looking for a woman's missing droid, which is the last memento of her dead husband. The Light Side option is to destroy the droid at said droid's request, then return to the woman and tell the truth (lying to her and saying the droid's still out there is the Dark Side option). The woman will be overcome with anguish at first, but will eventually meet and fall in love with a man, at which point she thanks you for what you did.
* ''VideoGame/ReKuroi'': One of the kids working for the bandits helps the party escape, in exchange for them helping him take revenge on the bandits for killing his parents. Asha double crosses him and tells him not to try to take revenge, since the bandits probably know about his plan and because revenge won't improve his life.

* In ''VisualNovel/PiofioreFatedMemories'', in Dante and Nicola's routes, [[spoiler: Nicola]] kidnapping and attempting to kill Lili, as well as their attempts to destroy all the mafia families and exile [[spoiler: Dante]] into leaving the city, was done out of a genuine desire to protect [[spoiler: Dante]] and free them from the role they were forced into.

* The Roak Orcs of ''Webcomic/{{Goblins}}'' have a tradition where a young orc's most prized possession is taken away from them. This teaches the orc to accept loss as a part of life rather than allowing the loss to define their life. [[spoiler:The Orc explaining this then tears off Duv's remaining wing, which has been the focus of her obsession]].

** ''ComicBook/UncannyXMen'': In the Proteus Saga, Proteus' ability to shape reality puts a great deal of fear into Wolverine. So much so, that ''ComicBook/{{Cyclops}}'' pushes him into a killing rage to prevent him from being permanently gunshy. [[RefugeInAudacity By throwing a cup of coffee in his face.]]

* In ''ComicBook/PrideOfBaghdad'', Safa the old lioness is this to Ali the lion cub. Ali [[CuriosityKilledTheCast ventures off]] and gets captured by monkeys that Safa dispatches. She asks Ali if they scared him, to which he replies yes.
-->'''Safa:''' Good. You needed it.

* In the ''Fanfic/HellsisterTrilogy'', a ''ComicBook/{{Supergirl}}'' fanfic, Kara vents her frustration and says aloud she just wants to be a normal girl from Argo City. Superman has to remind her it's not an option anymore.
-->'''Supergirl''': But we don't have to go out there with our dukes up, spoiling for a fight. Do we, Kal?\\
'''Superman''': No. Most of the time, it comes to us.\\
'''Supergirl''': Well, it's gonna have to start coming somewhere else before long. I'm tired of this. I wasn't born to be a, a super-heroine. I just wanted to be a normal girl from Argo, and, and get a good job and a good man and settle down...\\
'''Superman''': ''[gently]'' Except, there aren't very many people from Argo left anymore. Are there, Kara?\\
'''Supergirl''': Oh.\\
'''Dev-Em''': El, You have got the most peculiar set of proprieties I've ever seen. Why don't you just shove a Daxamite knife through her heart? Or would that be too kind?\\
'''Superman''': What I'm trying to remind her of is that our powers place us in a certain position. And it's one of obligation. No one on Earth can do what we can, and very often, to protect it and other planets, we are required to do everything we're capable of.
* ''Manga/{{Naruto}}'' fanfics:
** In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6693171/22/The-Mouse-of-Konoha The Mouse of Konoha]]'', Naruto is kidnapped and brought to T&I to be interrogated. After he breaks down crying in fear, it's revealed this was done to break him of the {{Hubris}} he'd been developing. "The Frightener" as it's known is actually something almost every ninja goes through when they become too cocky. The argument being that "It's better they see the inside of our T&I department than an enemy's." Afterwards, Tsume reveals that in her session, she was made to think she'd actually been captured by enemy forces who were brutally killing her partner Kuromaru.
** A few stories, such as the ''Fanfic/FirstTrySeries'', have someone deliberately making Sakura suffer so she'll either shape up as a kunoichi or quit before she gets herself and/or her team killed or worse.
* In ''Fanfic/CodeGeassThePreparedRebellion'', Zero consistently allows Kallen to vent her issues to Tamaki regarding his mistakes. This is because he has to be broken of his bad habits if he wants to survive the rebellion against Britannia.

* In [[https://archiveofourown.org/works/36308605/chapters/90516559 Whatever It Takes]], Viktor needs to get a fugitive Powder/Jinx into his apartment before the Enforcers see them, but she is so weak and exhausted that she collapses just outside the building. When gentle coaxing fails to get her moving, and knowing that he cannot carry her because of his disability, Victor resorts to coldly threatening to leave her behind in order to make her desperate and angry enough to push on until they reach safety.
* In [[http://archiveofourown.org/works/9083374?view_full_work=true this]] ''Literature/TheGoblinEmperor'' fanfic, Cala is given a magical date-rape drug that compels him to return to his abusive ex. As no cure can be found, Beshelar decides to lock him in his room until the effect fades. He explicitly says that he is being kind when Cala accuses him of cruelty.
* ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12286952/33/And-Yet-Again-Still-Even-More-Fragments ADD Hyper]]'': Partially due to a spell, but Hinata decides to act on a bit of advice from Kurenai that not fighting her family at full strength is harmful to them by making them think they're stronger than they are. As a result, Hinata decides to "beat the weakness" out of her entire clan to make them stronger.
* ''Fanfic/FatesCollide'': The reason why Bazett always attacks her students in sparring matches hard enough to send them to the infirmary is because she believes coddling them will only make them weaker. By forcing them to toughen up against her, she hopes it will reduce the chances that they will get themselves killed.
* ''Fanfic/ForgedDestiny'': This is invoked as the basis for why [[HeroAcademy Beacon]] and all the other Hero schools set such high standards for students, and won't hesitate to send them to the lower [[FantasticCasteSystem Soldier Caste]] should they fail. The academies understand that Remnant is a DeathWorld and that the life of a Hero is both harsh and dangerous. They know that if a person can't make it through the First Quest, or the various school demands, then it's better that they be kicked out now rather than get themselves and others killed later. WordOfGod is that this is why only 5 percent of the entire population are in the Hero Caste, while another 30 percent make up the Soldier Caste, despite there being no differences in the [[RPGMechanicsverse ''Classes'']] that comprise the two. This is seen twice during the Beacon entrance exam:
** Jaune sees a nervous applicant by herself, and tries to comfort and give a few tips, while Blake helps the same applicant by intimidating her to go back to the rest of the group while giving her a story to bond over. Jaune speculates that, between the two of them, Blake helped her more.
** Jaune then has to practice this himself while overseeing the actual examination. He spots the same applicant in the midst of a losing battle, but doesn't interfere so that she could have a chance to prove herself. [[spoiler:His desire to see a younger initiate succeed nearly gets her killed before he's forced to rescue and subsequently fail her.]]
* In ''Fanfic/PokemonResetBloodlines'', when Iris tries to follow Hunter J's Ship in an attempt to save her family, Ash's Pokédex immediately stops her and bluntly tells her it would be pointless as even if she could track down an invisible flying warship, she'd stand no chance against Hunter J or her equipment and Pokémon, even going as far as commandeering Ash's Charmeleon to beat down her Excadrill to prove its point. While this understandably [[HeroicBSOD shook Iris]], it still ultimately saved her life and allowed her to travel alongside Ash and the others.
* In ''Fanfic/ConcerningUs'' Janine breaks Helen's heart by maintaining the lie that her former fiancé is a [[UsefulNotes/JackTheRipper serial killer]], when the actual culprit is the elemental possessing him. She does it so Helen won't risk getting involved -- the elemental expressed interest in her, and this is the only way to ensure her safety.
* In ''Fanfic/ErasedPotential'', Yoshida-sensei ''thinks'' he's doing Izuku a favor by singling him out during an exercise where he has his students state their plans for the future. In his eyes, Izuku has absolutely no chance of making it into U.A., so it's best to keep humiliating him in front of his peers until he admits that himself, right?

* In ''Fanfic/BoysUndSenshado'', this is Shiho's justification for [[spoiler:[[IHaveNoSon disowning Miho]]]]. Shiho wants to fight against allowing boys into sensha-do, but knows she wouldn't be able to do so as long as Miho, her younger daughter, has boys on her team, so she [[spoiler:casts Miho out of the family]], partly so that Miho will be able to live and do tankery her own way. Of course, Shiho's elder daughter Maho has a very different opinion on this, since she does as Shiho says and works to become Shiho's heiress so Miho won't have to, and protests that this course of action only served to hurt Miho.
* ''Fanfic/CellarSecrets'':
** In chapter 31, Aikurou considers getting Ryuuko a flu shot this, as she's had not a good experience with needles and he hates the idea of traumatizing her. When he explains to her that "getting sick would hurt more" and that Satsuki would want to her to be okay because she loves her, she stops resisting and just asks to be held.
** Played subtly in Chapter 25, as, initially, Satsuki wanted to shield Ryuuko from Shiro's dying but opted not to because, to her, Ryuuko had to "see what death was for herself".
* Subverted in ''Fanfic/KaraOfRokyn''. Villain Zora Vi-Lar claims she insults Jara in order to push her and make her a better wrestler, but in reality she just despises her partner.
-->'''Zora:''' You're still in love with her? Are you Travelling Clan people as dumb as they say? You want to put this--\\
'''Jara:''' What's that about the Clan? You want to repeat that?\\
'''Zora:''' Hold it, hold on, Jara. Really, I'm sorry. I'm not downing the Clan, really, I'm not. That's just part of verbal motivation. I'm trying to get your back up for the match.\\
'''Jara:''' You've just about got it up for me to give you a preview of the match right here. There aren't enough of the Clan left hardly to count anymore, and you want to down them. I ought to pull your tongue out through your nostrils.\\
'''Zora:''' Jara. Don't you remember how I talked to you when we were sparring? And didn't that work, to get you going?\\
'''Jara:''' It sure did. You said if I couldn't do better than that, I might as well go back to making a living on my back. I damned near pulled your arm off for that one.\\
'''Zora:''' Exactly! I had to say something like that to get you mad. Without the rage, you don't have a chance against her. Put it together, Jara.
* In ''Fanfic/APrizeForThreeEmpires'', Marie Danvers forces her daughter [[ComicBook/CarolDanvers Carol]] to face the fact she has been blaming everyone else for her own issues so Carol can finally overcome their trauma instead of wallowing in anger and self-pity.
* ''Fanfic/ApotheosisMHA'': Deconstructed. All Might crushes Izuku's dreams of being a hero to protect a {{Muggle}} from a futile and dangerous path. It ended up massively backfiring on him as his well-meaning BrutalHonesty caused Izuku to despise him and everything All Might stands for. After a lifetime of discrimination and disappointment, All Might ends being the last straw that puts Izuku on a dark path.
* ''Fanfic/TowardsTheSun'': Zuko continues to refuse to listen to Iroh even as he's having a literal heart attack due to all the stress of being Fire Lord, due to Iroh never taking responsibility as a prince. This results in Iroh challenging Zuko to Agni Kai to oust Zuko as Fire Lord. While Iroh saves Zuko's life, having to re-live the worst memory of his life emotionally destroys Zuko. Zuko's relationship with Iroh is destroyed and ruins Iroh's credibility as Fire Lord.
* ''Fanfic/FalloutEquestria'': Velvet Remedy sedates Littlepip with a dart gun to force Littlepip to undergo treatment for her drug addiction. What makes it worse is the reason Velvet felt she couldn't wait any longer: Littlepip was planning to [[spoiler:rescue a criminal from the noose, which would have gotten Littlepip banished from the only place capable of curing her addiction. By the time Littlepip wakes up, the criminal has been executed]].
* In ''Fanfic/TheEmeraldPhoenix'', Bakugo's initial reasoning for bullying Izuku was because he knew trying to be a hero without a Quirk would get the boy killed. Eventually, Izuku's refusal to give up resulted in Bakugo bullying him for real.
* In ''Fanfic/SecurityWorm'', Michael Allen forces Allan Barnes to face that his overprotective behavior is ''not'' helping his daughter overcome her trauma; in fact, she's gotten worse because he keeps enabling her, and the only way to help her is to stop ignoring her issues, let her face the consequences of her actions, and get her therapy.
-->"Thank you. It wasn't in the least bit pleasant, but I think I needed to hear it."
* Gabriel ''thinks'' he's doing this in ''Fanfic/SomeoneToWatchOverMe'', when he deliberately torments Adrien in order to advance his plans to revive Adrien's mother. Since that kicks off the whole storyline, Technically he's even right, although not in the way he intended.
* Chloe Bourgeois plays this straight in ''Fanfic/SpellboundLilafly''. [[spoiler: By keeping up her low-level torment of Marinette, she can claim to the {{Faerie Court}}s that Marinette belongs to her and is off-limits to others, which keeps Marinette safe. Unfortunately that breaks down when other fae ignore and undermine her claims by ''befriending'' Marinette.]]
* ''Fanfic/TheRigelBlackChronicles'' sees Aldon Rosier coming to the conclusion that Rigel is too reserved, wanting to connect with others but being afraid to, and he takes it upon himself to push Rigel out of his comfort zone, stroking his hair and asking probing questions that clearly make him uncomfortable. (He doesn't realise that "Rigel" actually has deeper reasons for shying away from familiarity, namely, actually being Harriett Potter in disguise.)
* In ''Fanfic/RemnantsBizarreAdventure'', this is given as another reason by Joseph for faking Avdol's death and not telling Polnareff. Earlier, Polnareff reckless pursuit of J. Geil on his own nearly got himself and the others killed. The shock of Avdol's "death" will make Polnareff realize he can and ''should'' rely on his teammates rather than on his pride alone. Joseph even remarks he wished he went through something like that in past, instead of only learning this lesson [[spoiler:after Caesar's death]].
* In ''[[https://archiveofourown.org/works/39225693/chapters/98712189#workskin The Cat and The Bee]]'', Adrien is the one to select Chloe as the holder of the Bee Miraculous, but is frustrated that her AlphaBitch attitude keep causing Akumas, especially as she keeps emulating her mother. Knowing she won't grow unless she stops idolizing her, he stages a meeting between the two, letting her understand firsthand how Audrey treats anyone, [[AbusiveParent especially her own daughter]], is not something that should be followed.
* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10843256/1/Logic-of-the-Soul Logic of the Soul]]''. Raph acted as a BigBrotherBully towards Mikey and Don because he thought they needed toughening up. The approach worked on Mikey (who was able to shrug it off and retaliate in his own way) but not on Don.
* ''Fanfic/BlackbirdArrow'': Keeping [[AwfulTruth the truth about what happened to Laurel]] from Quentin is this, unquestionably. Everyone acknowledges that he deserves the truth, more than anyone else, but also that the guilt of the entire situation (unknowingly letting Laurel be kidnapped by the League, being oblivious to his ex-wife and other daughter's roles in what happened, unfairly disparaging Laurel for 'leaving him', etc.) might very well kill him. So they decide to keep it a secret from him instead, even though it strains his relationship with Laurel.

* ''Film/HardBoiled'': After Foxy's cover is blown and he is nearly beaten to death, another undercover agent Alan seemingly does ShootTheShaggyDog. It's actually a trick to convince the thugs that he has been killed by first slipping a metal lighter into his chest pocket while punching him in the gut and then using ImprobableAimingSkills to shoot exactly at it (breaking a few more ribs). It's cruel, but Foxy survives ([[spoiler: but not for long]]).

* ''Film/PoolOfLondon'' (1951): Near the end of the film, Dan (played by Bonar Colleano) abruptly brushes off his loyal sidekick Johnny (played by Earl Cameron). Johnny assumes it is for racial reasons but actually Dan realizes that he (Dan) is likely to be arrested and wants to distance Johnny from his problems.
* ''Film/PiratesOfTheCaribbeanDeadMansChest'': Will is ordered to be flogged for a mistake on Davy Jones' ship. When it comes out that Will is Bootstrap Bill's son, Jones orders Bootstrap to carry out the flogging himself. Initially, Bootstrap refuses, but when Jones threatens to have the boatswain do it instead, Bootstrap obliges. Later he explains to an angry Will that the boatswain is an expert flogger who "prides himself on cleaving flesh from bone with every blow". Therefore, doing it himself spared Will even greater pain.
* ''Film/{{Mowgli}}'': Bagheera intentionally targets Mowgli all throughout the Running and tackles him before he reaches the finish, causing him to fail. While fighting with a furious Baloo over it, Bagheera points out that by making him fail the Running, he hopes that it'll be enough to make him go to the man-village and be safe from [[BigBad Shere Khan]].
* ''Film/JojoRabbit'': [[spoiler:Klenzendorf]] manages to spare [[spoiler:Jojo]] from a Soviet firing squad by ripping off a military jacket the boy was wearing, yelling and [[SpitefulSpit spitting at him]] to make the Russian soldiers think he's a Jew and send him away.
* ''Film/TheLordOfTheRingsTheFellowshipOfTheRing'': After their narrow escape from the Mines of Moria, most of the Fellowship is extremely distraught at the loss of Gandalf that just happened and stop just outside the exit to mourn. However, Aragorn orders Boromir to get them on their feet and continue the journey, answering protests of not giving them a moment by noting that they don't have time: by nightfall, the whole area will be crawling with Orcs fully intent on killing them or worse, and the Fellowship must get to safety before dusk.

* Homework, the bane of most children's life. However, it is important to the child's education, and also teaches time management. Whilst many anti-homework groups have expressed concern that it causes stress, [[StrawmanHasAPoint which is not wrong]], in reality, this "stress" is pretty much a [[FirstWorldProblems first world problem]]. If homework induced stress was a ''serious'' issue, we would be getting ''millions'' of reports of children who have (unironically) suffered as a result of it.

* ''LetsPlay/DreamSMP'': PlayedForDrama and ultimately {{deconstructed|Trope}}. [[ByronicHero Quackity]], at least in the darkest parts of his spiral, seemed to view various events in his TraumaCongaLine of a life as "lessons" to be "learnt", e.g. not to trust others or [[SafetyInIndifference to create emotional attachment]] [[spoiler:(spoiler on the latter "lesson", he's a massive {{hypocrite}} about it)]], instead of genuinely traumatic events that no one should have to go through--or would have gone through if the DSMP weren't a CrapsackWorld to begin with. As a result of this, he shows this mentality in his third "Las Nevadas" stream and Tina's introduction to the server, rather aggressively [[PsychologicalProjection projecting]] these "lessons" onto others in a SillyRabbitIdealismIsForKids sort of way, likely thinking it would spare others from the trauma ''he'' had gone through to "learn" those "lessons". For the most part, this is indicated to be a negative mentality to demonstrate [[BecameTheirOwnAntithesis the degree Quackity's fallen]], and all of this ends up making his victims (for lack of a better word) either concerned for him and his mental well-being (e.g. Foolish and Slime[[spoiler:/Charlie]]), question this mentality and his morality (e.g. Tina), [[spoiler:or plot revenge against him (e.g. Purpled)]]. Quackity did later admit some of those courses of action were pretty fucked up and apologized for doing so, [[spoiler:but let's just say Purpled [[BestServedCold does not forgive easily]], and Slime/Charlie eventually goes on to call him out for perpetuating the CycleOfRevenge and TheChainOfHarm through this.]]

* Homework, the bane of most children's life. However, it is important to the child's education, and also teaches time management. Whilst some anti-homework groups have expressed concern that it causes stress, which is not wrong, this stress is petty much no worse then any other [[FirstWorldProblems first world problem]], overwise we would getting ''millions'' of reports of children who have (unironically) suffered as a result of homework induced stress.

* Homework, the bane of most children's life. However, it is important to the child's education, it also teaches time management. Whilst some anti-homework groups have expressed concern that it causes stress, which is not wrong, this stress is petty much no worse then any other [[FirstWorldProblems first world problem]], overwise we would getting ''millions'' of reports of children who have (unironically) suffered as a result of homework induced stress.

* In ''VideoGame/MassEffect2'', Admiral Shala'Raan declines to tell Tali precisely what the consequences were of her supposed "treason" against the Quarian Migrant Fleet until she and Shepard arrive among the fleet, resulting in Tali getting publicly blindsided with accusations that she fed information to the Geth which allowed them to capture her father. As harsh as this is, Raan later tells Tali that it was necessary, because Tali's honest shock helped prove that she had no intention of compromising the Migrant Fleet, whereas if she'd known the details in advance, she would have tried to compose herself and it might have made her look suspicious.

'''Shinji''': When it became apparent that we'd be the only ones left, I was glad that at least you were here with me. Not because I was with somebody, but because I was with you. And I believed you, when you said that you would feel the same way about me. But that was just a lie, wasn't it? It never mattered to you that it was me. You just didn't want to be alone; anybody would... ''([[ArmorPiercingSlap Asuka slaps him]])''\\

* In ''VisualNovel/PiofioreNoBansho'', in Dante and Nicola's routes, [[spoiler: Nicola]] kidnapping and attempting to kill Lili, as well as their attempts to destroy all the mafia families and exile [[spoiler: Dante]] into leaving the city, was done out of a genuine desire to protect [[spoiler: Dante]] and free them from the role they were forced into.

* In ''Film/DayOfTheOutlaw'', Captain Bruhn takes Gene's gun off him and orders him to give Tex his horse, telling him that he is being dismissed from the unit. Bruhn then rides off, leading the others, leaving Gene afoot in the snowy wilderness. However, he is actually doing this because he knows he he is dying, and once he he is dead, there will be nothing to stop Tex and Pace killing Gene. This way, Gene has a chance to survive, as he is still close enough to Bitters to make it back to town.

* ''Manga/{{Bakuman}}'': Discussed when Mashiro is talking to Takagi about an editor's story that left an impression on him. He tells of a young artist who had sent his drafts to the editor, who proceeded to take a look and dump everything into a paper shredder -- much to Takagi's astonishment, as he notes that [[SurprisinglyRealisticOutcome nowadays, the editor would probably be sued if he tried that]]. This only drove the artist to work harder on his art and, when he got serialized, the editor invited him to dinner and apologized for the earlier treatment, while the artist tearfully thanked him for forcing him to strive harder.

** "Ponyville Confidential". Yes, the entire town shunned the Cutie Mark Crusaders after they found out who Gabby Gums was... but the ''ultimate'' result is that after the CMC apologize for spreading gossip, Diamond Tiara, the instigator of the mess, is punished for her part in the events of the episode. And it's kinder to let the CMC know how wrong it is now, before they screw up later in life. This can be considered moot however, when Rarity's confrontation with Sweetie Belle ends up being the punch they need to decide to stop the gossip column as, while she was just as mad at the fillies as the rest of Ponyville and had a right to call her out on saying mean things about her, she was being very reasonable. Also, while this did not happen, [[SurprisinglyRealisticOutcome treating three fillies like criminals could very well haunt them forever, even if they did something really bad.]]

*** "[[Recap/StarTrekS1E23ATasteOfArmageddon A Taste of Armageddon]]" has Kirk destroy the computers that are used to prevent all-out nuclear war. This is a good thing because [[AMillionIsAStatistic the two sides were using those computers to sanitize war by peacefully euthanize their populations (simulating various battles and strategies) in a cheaper and less destructive way]], and were doing this for ''[[ForeverWar 500 years]]'' before the ''Enterprise'' came along. Kirk points out that [[WarIsHell war is]] ''[[WarIsHell supposed to be]]'' [[WarIsHell a miserable experience]] so that you do everything you can to avoid it. By making nuclear war possible, they have a reason to actually end the conflict.

** At the start of the series, Ed and Al meet Rose, a woman who's lost her boyfriend and believes that [[StarterVillain Father Cornello]], the spiritual leader of the city of Liore, can bring him back. After the brothers reveal that Cornello is a fraud and defeat him, Rose begins to despair, but Ed harshly tells her to stand on her own two feet. He and Al had lost their mother and made a failed attempt to bring her bck that cost Ed his leg(symbolic of his ability to move forward) and Al his body(forcing Ed to sacrifice an arm to bind Al's soul to a suit of armor), so they know what it's like to lose someone. Much later in the series, as Liore is starting to rebuild, Ed and Al's ChildhoodFriend Winry meets Rose, who's much more determined and hopeful. After Rose tells Winry what Ed did for her, Winry's shocked at how much of a jerk [[JerkWithAHeartOfGold Ed]] can be, but Rose says that's Ed's way of showing kindness.

A subtrope to GoodIsNotNice. Compare ShootTheDog, TheExtremistWasRight, NecessarilyEvil, PercussivePrevention, HelpingWouldBeKillstealing, RevoltingRescue, and KindRestraints. For the parental version see ToughLove. Also compare BreakHisHeartToSaveHim and ItsNotYouItsMyEnemies, where a character abandons a love interest in an attempt to protect him or her. ForYourOwnGood is usually the character's stated justification in incorporating this trope.