History Literature / ADescriptionOfTheNorthernPeoples

* NonindicativeName: The books' titles sometimes bear little relevance to what they're actually about. To quote the Swedish [[Wiki/{{Wikipedia}} other Wiki:]]

* SealedRoomInTheMiddleOfNowhere: The story about the evil wizard Kettil Runske, who trapped his apprentice Gilbert in one of these on Visingsö. Not only is it a SealedRoomInTheMiddleOfNowhere, it's also a labyrinth, and the air inside it is so stale and poisonous that neither human or animal can breathe it without dropping dead. Hilariously, Magnus ends by saying that despite this, [[SchmuckBait Visingsö is actually a nice, scenic location, and he can recommend giving it a visit.]]
* ShearMenace: The Swedes like to attach shears and scythes to wagons, tie them to trees and camoflauge them, feint a retreat, and when the enemy is in position, [[OhCrap loose them.]]
* ShroudedInMyth: Olaus Magnus freely mixes actual historical facts with pure Mythology. However, ''A Description of the Northern Peoples'' shouldn't be used as a historical source for anything other than [[UsefulNotes/TheRenaissance Olaus' own time.]]

* ArtImitatesLife: Magnus writes about how, when a city is withstanding a siege in the freezing winter, it's possible with enough water and manpower, to build a wall of ice for protection. [[Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire Sounds familiar, no?]]
* AnOfferYouCantRefuse: When the Swedish borders are threatened, a rider is sent out, carrying a stick which is burnt in one end, and wrapped in rope in the other. This is a sign that all the villages receiving it, who refuse to provide men for combat, will be burned down and have their people hanged.
* CulturalTranslation: Much like ''Saxo Grammaticus'', Olaus had to simplify Nordic culture a bit, for his mainly Italian audience. Among other things, Elves are called "Satyrs".

** Magnus cautions about going ice-skating on treacherous lakes, since he has seen many skaters fall right through the ice and be decapitated, having their body sink to the bottom, while the head is left on the ice "with a stupid expression."
** In another chapter, where Magnus talks about the importance of physical fitness, he remembers a story about a Soldier in Stockholm who was set to be executed, only it had to be called off, since the Soldier [[FatSlob was so fat]] that the hangman was physically unable to do it. [[ValuesDissonance Magnus seems to feel genuinely sorry for him.]]
* DepravedDwarf: Greenland is supposedly home to a gang of Pirate Raiders led by an evil Dwarf. This Dwarf, Magnus claims; is not afraid to fight normal-sized men, but instead "Offers the tall man the edge of his spear and stands proud like a Triumphator." [[http://www.avrosys.nu/prints/olausmagnus/100434.jpg Clearly.]]
* NonindicativeName: To quote the Swedish [[Wiki/{{Wikipedia}} other Wiki:]]
--> "There's nearly always a red thread between the essays of the books, but they don't always allude to the books' title. Book number thirteen is a good example of this, since according to its title, it should concern itself with agriculture and living conditions but is mostly about [[{{Beergasm}} beer, how good it is,]] how funny in the head it makes you, and different ways of brewing it around the world."

* SpikedWheels: The Swedes also have a type of armed chariot, which apparently works like a giant reel mower, and is used against cavalry.

* TreeCover: The "Bråte." Swedish farmers were semi-famous throughout Europe for their skill in guerilla warfare. Olaus Magnus describes how they would cut trees along forest roads until they were halfway down, then tie ropes around them, and when your standard German or Danish knightly army comes along, the Swedes would pull the trees down and then [[MultiDirectionalBarrage let loose with slings, crossbows and throwing spears from behind their new battlements.]] The word "Bråte" remains in the Swedish language today, and means "junk" or "mess."
* TykeBomb: Swedish children are bred for war by way of snowball fights. The defending side builds forts and so learns about fortifications. The attacking side learns about siege warfare and artillery. Pretty soon the fighting goes hand to hand, and the losers [[TheSpartanWay "are subject to insults so they can perform better the next time."]]
* WeatherManipulation: If you are a sorcerer or warlock, in ''A Description of the Northern Peoples'', then this is probably your main talent. The Lapps and forest-Finns, make a living by selling magical knotted ropes to sailors stuck in a lull. For every knot loosed, a stronger wind will occur, varying from "breeze" to "tsunami". There's also the Swedish king Eric Weatherhat, who owns a magical helmet that when waved, gives him fortuitous winds on his Viking cruises.
* YouCantFightFate: Two Geatish brothers receive a prophecy as kids: that one of them will kill the other. They decide to travel as far away from each other in different Hemispheres of the world as possible. Years later, they return to Sweden as old men. They meet each other when stopping to rest under a spruce tree, not recognizing who the other is. Pretty soon their dogs and then themselves, get into a fight and [[MutualKill kill each other]].

Although ''A Description of the Northern Peoples'' might be less know than the ''Literature/{{Heimskringla}}'', ''Literature/GestaDanorum'' or even ''Literature/TheKalevala'' in the pantheon of Nordic legends, this wasn't always the case for better of for worse. During the [[SalemIsWitchCountry Salem Witch Trials]] the prosecution used the stories about Lappish magic and sorcery in this book, as a basis for their mock jurisprudence.

See also the Art/CartaMarina.

You can check out the original print [[https://books.google.de/books?id=O9lEAAAAcAAJ&dq=inauthor:%22Olaus+Magnus%22&pg=PP5&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q&f=false as a digitized book.]]

''A Description of the Northern Peoples'' [[note]]''Historia om de nordiska folken'' in Swedish and ''Historia de Gentibus Septentrionalibus'' in its original Latin.[[/note]] is a massive Latin-language anthology, written in 1555 by the exiled Swedish Titular Bishop, Olaus Magnus. It's an absolute {{Doorstopper}} of a work, divided into 22 books and numbering nearly a thousand pages. Work on the subject, began in 1518 when Magnus was tasked with selling letters of indulgence in Swedish Norrland--then considered to be akin to TheWildWest and filled with pagan, godless Lapps and Finns with their creepy rituals--and finished 35 years later in Rome, where he was living in exile, since Sweden had kinda, sorta, outlawed Catholicism during that time.

It's a very eclectic work, going into detail about everything from architecture to agriculture to war, beer and [[WeirdnessCensor armies of dwarves fighting cranes on Greenland.]] It covers a huge chunk of history, from TheTimeOfMyths to about the mid 16th century. Naturally, the book is mostly focused on the affairs of UsefulNotes/{{Sweden}} and UsefulNotes/{{Finland}}, but Magnus also talks about UsefulNotes/{{Norway}} and [[UsefulNotes/{{Russia}} "Muscovites".]] UsefulNotes/{{Denmark}} is also included of course, but in contrast to the former, Olaus Magnus [[MyFriendsAndZoidberg doesn't seem to consider the Danes as "Nordic peoples".]]

* WeatherManipulation: If you are a sorcerer or warlock, in ''A Description Of The Northern Peoples'', then this is probably your main talent. The Lapps and forest-Finns, make a living by selling magical knotted ropes to sailors stuck in a lull. For every knot loosed, a stronger wind will occur, varying from "breeze" to "tsunami". There's also the Swedish king Eric Weatherhat, who owns a magical helmet that when waved, gives him fortuitous winds on his Viking cruises.

''A Description of the Northern Peoples'' [[note]]''Historia om de nordiska folken'' in Swedish and ''Historia de Gentibus Septentrionalibus'' in its original Latin.[[/note]] is a massive Latin-language Anthology, written in 1555 by the exiled Swedish Titular Bishop, Olaus Magnus. It's an absolute {{Doorstopper}} of a work, divided into 22 books and numbering nearly a thousand pages. Work on the subject, began in 1518 when Magnus was tasked with selling letters of indulgence in Swedish Norrland--then considered to be akin to TheWildWest and filled with pagan, godless Lapps and Finns with their creepy rituals--and finished 35 years later in Rome, where he was living in exile, since Sweden had kinda, sorta, outlawed Catholicism during that time.

* YouCantFightFate: Two Geatish brothers receive a prophecy as kids: that one of them will kill the other. They decide to travel as far away from each other in different Hemispheres of the world as possible. Years later, they return to Sweden as old men. They meet each other when stopping to rest under a spruce tree, not recognizing who the other is. Pretty soon their dogs and then themselves, get into a fight and [[MutualKill kill each other.]]

* TakeThat: Magnus says that there are many places in Sweden with names like "Danskkärr" ("Dane's Bog") because of the large number of Danes that have been drowned there in wartime. There's also a place called "Fyrtandskulle" ("Four teeth hill") because of its vicinity to Brunkeberg, where Christian I of Denmark lost his front teeth to fire from a hand cannon.
* TreeCover: The "Bråte." Swedish farmers were semi-famous throughout Europe for their skill in guerilla warfare. Olaus Magnus describes how they would cut trees along forest roads until they were halfway down, then tie ropes around them, and when your standard German or Danish knightly army comes along, the Swedes would pull the trees down and then [[MultiDirectionalBarrage let loose with slings, crossbows and throwing spears from behind their new battlements.]] The word "Bråte" remains in the Swedish language today, and means "junk" or "mess."
* TykeBomb: Swedish children are bred for war by way of snowball fights. The defending side builds forts and so learns about fortifications. The attacking side learns about siege warfare and artillery. Pretty soon the fighting goes hand to hand, and the losers [[TheSpartanWay "are subject to insults so they can perform better the next time."]]

* YouCantFightFate: Two Geatish brothers receive a prophecy as kids: that one of them will kill the other. They decide to travel as far away from each other in different Hemispheres of the world as possible. Years later, they return to Sweden as old men. They meet each other when stopping to rest under a spruce tree, not recognizing who the other is. Pretty soon their dogs and then themselves, get into a fight and [[MutualKill kill each other.]]
* NonindicativeName: To quote the Swedish [[Wiki/{{Wikipedia}} other Wiki:]]
--> "There's nearly always a red thread between the essays of the books, but they don't always allude to the books' title. Book number thirteen is a good example of this, since according to its title, it should concern itself with agriculture and living conditions but is mostly about [[{{Beergasm}} beer, how good it is,]] how funny in the head it makes you, and different ways of brewing it around the world."
* WeatherManipulation: If you are a sorcerer or warlock, in ''A Description Of The Northern Peoples'', then this is probably your main talent. The Lapps and forest-Finns, make a living by selling magical knotted ropes to sailors stuck in a lull. For every knot loosed, a stronger wind will occur, varying from "breeze" to "tsunami". There's also the Swedish king Eric Weatherhat, who owns a magical helmet that when waved, gives him fortuitous winds on his Viking cruises.

* SwordCane: Ole den Raske and his warriors, all use this weapon.
* YouCantFightFate: Two Geatish brothers receive a prophecy as kids, that one of them will kill the other. They decide to travel as far away from each other, in different Hemispheres of the world, as possible. Years later, they return to Sweden as old men. They meet each other when stopping to rest under a spruce tree, not recognizing who the other is. Pretty soon their dogs and then themselves, get into a fight and [[MutualKill kill each other.]]

--> "There's nearly always a red thread between the essays of the books, but they don't always allude to the books title. Book number thirteen is a good example of this, since according to its title it should concern itself with agriculture and living conditions, but is mostly about [[{{Beergasm}} beer, and how good it is,]] how funny in the head it makes you, and different ways of brewing it around the world."

* ShroudedInMyth: Olaus Magnus freely mixes actual historical facts with pure Mythology. However, ''A Description of the Northern Peoples'' shouldn't be used as a historical source for anything other than [[UsefulNotes/TheRenaissance Olaus own time.]]

* ShearMenace: The Swedes like to attachs Shears and Scythes to wagons, tie them to trees and camoflauge them, feint a retreat and when the enemy is in position, [[OhCrap loose them.]]

* DanceBattler: The book claims that Swedish youths have a dance wich is more like a form of ritualized Swordfighting. Two lines of dancers, symbolically take turns at striking each other with (pulled) Sword blows. Gradually, the music is played faster and faster and the dancing is forced to follow suit, demanding extreme skill from the dancers, not to kill each other.

* CulturalTranslation: Much like Saxo Grammaticus, Olaus had to simplify Nordic culture a bit, for his mainly Italian audience. Among other things, Elves are called "Satyrs".

* NonindicativeName: To quote the Swedish [[ThatOtherWiki other Wiki:]]

* TakeThat: Magnus says that there are many places in Sweden with names like "Danskkärr" ("Dane's Bog") because of the large number of Danes that have been drowned there in wartime. Theres also a place called "Fyrtandskulle" ("Four teeth hill") because of its vincinity to Brunkeberg, where Christian I of Denmark lost his front teeth to fire from a hand cannon.

* TakeThat: Magnus says that there are many places in Sweden with names like "Danskkärr" ("Dane's Bog") because of the large number of Danes that have been drowned there in wartime. Theres also a place called "Fyrtandskulle" ("Four teeth hill") because of its vincinity to Brunkeberg, where Christian 1 of Denmark lost his front teeth to fire from a hand cannon.

Although ''A Description of the Northern Peoples'' might be less know than the ''Literature/{{Heimskringla}}'', ''Literature/GestaDanorum'' or even ''Literature/TheKalevala'' in the phanteon of Nordic legends, this wasn't always the case for better of for worse. During the [[SalemIsWitchCountry Salem Witch Trials]] the prosecution used the stories about Lappish magic and sorcery in this book, as a basis for their mock jurisprudence.

* AnOfferYouCantRefuse: When the Swedish borders are threatened, a rider is sent out, carrying a stick which is burnt in one end, and wrapped in rope in the other. This is a sign that all the villages recieving it, who refuse to provide men for combat, will be burned down and have their people hanged.

* AnOfferYouCantRefuse: When the Swedish borders are threatened, a rider is sent out, carrying a stick which is burnt in one end, and wrapped in rope in the other. This is a sign that all the villages who refuse to provide men for combat, will be burned down and have their people hanged.