History Funny / TheOfficeUS

* In "Trivia" the whole office ends up trailing Oscar to a gay bar to take part in a Trivia Night in order to meet their quarterly quota. Andy suggests that the Office break up into three teams "Team A," "Team Backup" and "Just here to have fun," but doesn't specifically assign anyone because everyone should natural know what their placement is. This actually goes off without a hitch except Kevin obliviously tries to join Team A with Andy, Jim, Darryl, and Ryan leading to a really awkward staredown with Andy.

* In possibly one of the best of Jim's pranks in a long time, while he is at the dentist, he and Pam get Steve, an actor friend of theirs who is Asian to pretend to be Jim, to the point where he can use Jim's password and kisses Pam. This '''completely''' freaks Dwight out. He tries to prove he's not Jim by getting a family photo from Pam's desk but is shocked to find instead of picture Asian Jim posing with Pam and their two Asian children!

[[[folder:Season 1]]

!!Season 1

!!Season 2

!!Season 3

!!Season 4

!!Season 5

!!Season 6

!!Season 7

!!Season 8

!!Season 9

!!Webisodes

!!Other

* In "Trivia", Jim spearheads "the longest silent streak in office history". When [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_YTG9vTkhGs the clip went up on the official [=YouTube=] channel]], it was titled [[spoiler: [[HilariousInHindsight Dunder Mifflin]] [[{{Pun}} is]] Film/AQuietPlace.]]

** Also, the fact that Dwight not only got Roy with the pepper-spray, [[RealityEnsues but also Pam, Jim (who he was saving), and]] ''[[RealityEnsues himself]]'' since in his talking head segment discussing the incident, his face is practically soaked with tears.

** And in the cold open to this episode, Dwight has elevated his desk so that he can stand at work at all times, which Jim goads him into committing to constantly after Dwight brags about it too much. Of course, [[RealityEnsues the standing quickly becomes pretty difficult to stick with]], so Dwight tries to get away with sitting on a stilt hidden in his trousers. Jim notices this, walks up to Dwight and puts a hand on him.

** ''Anything'' involving [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FldGxkUFuuQ Pretzel Day]], especially with Stanley and Michael forming an EnemyMine against Bob Vance from Vance Refridgeration to make sure that he doesn't cut in line in front of them.

** After Scott spills the beans that he's unable to give the students free college tuition, you think he's going to make it up to them by giving them all laptops. But no, he's just giving them [[ConvenienceStoreGiftShopping batteries]] to power the laptops that they still have to buy themselves.

* "Frazzled": Jim when Pam is going into labor and refusing to go to the hospital. The best moment was when her contractions were coming within 5 to 7 minutes and she still refused to go to the hospital. Jim holed up in a hallway going through motherhood books.
-->'''Jim:''' Five to seven minutes. ''(tosses book aside)'' Five to seven minutes. ''(tosses book aside)'' Six minutes. Different, but ''not really.''
** When trying to prolong Pam's contractions, Michael say they just need to do the opposite of whatever the books say will speed things up. When he reads aloud "eat spicy foods" Kevin's suggestion is "stick spicy food up her butt!".
** The entire scene where Jim, Pam, Dwight and Michael prepare to leave the office to go to the hospital. It's just under a minute of pure chaos. Highlights include Dwight stopping Erin from calling an ambulance because they're "emergencies only", Jim frantically looking for his keys to discover that they're [[FailedASpotCheck in his hand,]] Dwight asking if anyone had checked how dilated Pam was which Michael tells him off for because Jim should be doing that and Michael frantically asking if he should bring a dictionary to the hospital while packing, which Oscar replies without missing a beat that hospitals will provide dictionaries and to bring a thesaurus, while giving the camera an AsideGlance. The scene is capped off with ''Michael'' calling for the employees to wish ''him'' luck as he leaves.
** Dwight attempting to give Jim and Pam a "police escort" to the hospital when they're about to have a baby. It results in Dwight getting pulled over as the real police officer says, "You're not supposed to impersonate a police officer. [[OhNoNotAgain Please don't make this difficult, Dwight.]]" On top of that, Dwight is ''throwing a sword and battle axe'' out the window.
** At the hospital, Pam accidentally breastfeeding the wrong baby.

* [[invoked]] Michael's petulant attitude during the Christmas party. He complains about PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad because Phyllis is playing Santa Claus, at which point he dresses up like Santa, [[CrossesTheLineTwice calls her "Tranny Claus"]] and inadvertently sexually harasses his staff by ordering them to [[ThatCameOutWrong sit on his lap so there would be no doubt about his manliness]].

* In the beginning of "The Carpet", Pam has been on vacation for a week and Ryan has been taking her place behind the reception. The scene hangs a nice Lampshade on just how often Jim looks in Pam's direction each episode, so much that he can't help himself, even if Pam isn't there. Ryan isn't completely comfortable with it, but he has bigger problems to worry about... such as Michael, who apparently has been spending the week standing behind the blinds and staring really intensely at him.
-->'''Ryan:''' Jim has been looking at me... kind of ''a lot'' all week. I would be creeped out by it, but it's nothing compared to the way Michael looks at me.

* In Diversity Day, Michael Scott's incredibly misguided attempt at a diversity seminar.
* In Health Care, Jim and Pam coming up with fake diseases. It's so funny that it [[{{ActuallyPrettyFunny}} even causes Angela to laugh ]].

* In Basketball, the entire trash talking scene between Jim and Pam, but especially this bit:

* In Hot Girl, Jim and Pam make up a conversation as they watch Dwight flirt with a woman selling purses.

* "The Dundies:"

* In "Sexual Harrassment," Michael has been asked to lay off the inappropriate jokes, including "ThatsWhatSheSaid." Jim immediately [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ly84CagzobU starts baiting him]]. He doesn't last long (that's what she said!).

--->'''Ryan's Voicemail:''' Seven new messages. First new message:
--->'''Michael:''' Hi, Ryan! This is Saddam Hussein!
--->'''Ryan's Voicemail:''' Next message:
--->'''Michael:''' Hey, Ryan. This is your girlfriend and I'm mad.
* From "The Client:"

* From "Performance Review:"
-->'''Michael:''' Pam, you're trustworthy.
-->'''Pam:''' Thank you.
-->'''Michael:''' And a woman.
-->'''Pam:''' Oh no.

** Jim telling the cameramen all of the inside jokes he's putting in Pam's gift because Christmas is the "time to tell people how you feel." Cue a silent but sure moment of DidIJustSayThatOutLoud

** Jim bets the cameraman that, on the yacht, Michael will cry out "I'm the King of the World!" within the hour or he'll give his next paycheck to him. Michael stands at the end of the ship and crying out "I'm the King of the World!"
*** Jim taps his watch and nods to the cameraman.

** There were several funny moments in "Take Your Daughter to Work Day," but the best had to be Dwight reading Struwwelpeter to the kids.
--->'''Michael:''' No one wants to hear about your Nazi grandmother.
---> '''Sasha:''' What's a Nazi?

* "Conflict Resolution:" A list of Jim's pranks on Dwight were read out. Granted, it's also a bit sad in how it doubles as showcasing how much of a {{Jerkass}} Jim can be at times to Dwight, but the ComedicSociopathy is prevalent enough that it still makes it all hilarious.
** "Whenever I typed my name, it said Diapers."

*** Jim elaborates that he placed nickels in Dwight's receiver over time, then removed them at once.
*** Which makes the scene in the pilot when Dwight takes his receiver out of a locked desk drawer even funnier.

--->'''Creed:''' That is northern lights cannabis indica.

** Pam and Jim's regulations for Jinx are that if you are Jinxed, you have to buy the Jinx-er a coke. Unfortunately, the machine is out, leaving Jim unable to speak. Cue a series of ear-to-ear grins from Pam as Jim suffers horribly.

-->'''Jan:''' First off, Michael, this is a salary negotiation. All matters regarding our personal relationship have to be set aside, are we clear?
-->'''Michael:''' [[ItMakesSenseInContext Bippity-boppity]].
-->'''Jan:''' Right now we can offer you a six-percent raise.
-->'''Michael:''' Six percent? After all we've been through?
-->'''Jan:''' Oh ''God.''
-->'''Michael:''' I got you jade earrings... You wanna play it like this? You give me a good raise, or no more sex. ''[notices Toby making notes]'' What are you writing, perv-ball?!
-->'''Toby:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck ...Just preparing for the deposition.]]
-->'''Toby:''' ''(in a talking head)'' [[CueTheFlyingPigs This may be the first time that]] a male subordinate has attempted to get a modest scheduled raise by threatening to withhold sex from a female superior. It will be a groundbreaking case when it inevitably goes to trial.

--> '''Angela:''' ''(trying to sabotage him)'' I don't understand what you want from me.
--> '''Andy:''' Angela, it's pretty simple. Look at what I am doing and go tell somebody it!

* Michael kidnapping a pizza boy who refused Michael's Coupon. And everything involving this subplot.

** Jim's brief OhCrap look in the ColdOpen when he realizes that Michael has OutGambitted him and Pam in making sure that they can't attend his and Jan's dinner party.

** Pam's reaction to Dwight and his babysitter showing up. She said in a loud whisper "Awesome!"

*** The blooper reel for that scene is even funnier, with everyone (especially John Krasinski) being unable to control their laughter (at one point, Steve Carell quips that they're never going to finish the episode- and then promptly ruins the next take by cracking up ''himself''). Even in the final cut, they can barely resist it.

--->'''Michael:''' Jim, you're six-eleven and you weigh ninety pounds, Gumby has a better body than you. Boom, roasted. Dwight, you're a kiss-ass. Boom, roasted. Pam, you failed art school, boom, roasted. Meredith, you've slept with so many guys you're starting to look like one. Boom, roasted. Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke or a dumb joke. Boom, roasted. Creed, your teeth called: your breath stinks. ''([[FunnyBackgroundEvent Creed nods]] [[{{Touche}} thoughtfully in agreement]])'' Boom, roasted. Angela--where's Angela? Oh, there you are, I didn't see you behind that ''grain of rice.'' Boom, roasted! Stanley! You crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom, roasted. ''([[ActuallyPrettyFunny Stanley starts laughing like a kazoo]])'' Oscar you are... ''[distracted by Stanley, with everyone else also starting to laugh]'' ...Oscar, you're gay! Andy, Cornell called, they think you suck! And you're gayer than Oscar. Boom, roasted!

* "Double Date": [[TheDogBitesBack Toby]] [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJWF0E6a8CM&t=152s&ab_channel=TheOffice giving Pam advice on how to best slap Michael]], and Michael's slowly dawning terror over the impending "fight" between him and Pam.

* When trying to prolong Pam's contractions, Michael say they just need to do the opposite of whatever the books say will speed things up. When he reads aloud "eat spicy foods" Kevin's suggestion is "stick spicy food up her butt!".
* The entire scene where Jim, Pam, Dwight and Michael prepare to leave the office to go to the hospital. It's just under a minute of pure chaos. Highlights include Dwight stopping Erin from calling an ambulance because they're "emergencies only", Jim frantically looking for his keys to discover that they're [[FailedASpotCheck in his hand,]] Dwight asking if anyone had checked how dilated Pam was which Michael tells him off for because Jim should be doing that and Michael frantically asking if he should bring a dictionary to the hospital while packing, which Oscar replies without missing a beat that hospitals will provide dictionaries and to bring a thesaurus, while giving the camera an AsideGlance. The scene is capped off with ''Michael'' calling for the employees to wish ''him'' luck as he leaves.
* Dwight attempting to give Jim and Pam a "police escort" to the hospital when they're about to have a baby. It results in Dwight getting pulled over as the real police officer says, "You're not supposed to impersonate a police officer. [[OhNoNotAgain Please don't make this difficult, Dwight.]]" On top of that, Dwight is ''throwing a sword and battle axe'' out the window.
* At the hospital, Pam accidentally breastfeeding the wrong baby.

* Michael's petulant attitude during the Christmas party. He cries about PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad because Phyllis is playing Santa Claus, at which point he dresses up like Santa, calls her "Tranny Claus" and sexually harasses his staff by ordering them to [[ThatCameOutWrong sit on his lap so there would be no doubt about his manliness]].

* "The Chump": [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zIoqlLU4E74 The entire argument]] over shooting Bin Laden, Hitler, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking and Toby]], especially because there's no option ever given where [[TheFriendNobodyLikes Toby]] ''doesn't'' get shot.

** Also, later on, there's Dwight showing the cameras that he has various wigs for impersonating the office staff, including Kevin, Phyllis, Pam, Meredith, and Stanley.

** And in the film cut of the episode, he says [[BrickJoke earlier]], "''The Scarn''? Sounds gay."

** The ridiculously overtop OverlyLongGag of Toby's character's [[YourHeadAsplode head exploding]] from Goldenface's BoomHeadshot. Even funnier, when Michael Scarn runs in and Goldenface mocks him for failing to save Goldenface, Scarn dismisses the "dead" Toby as "[[AssholeVictim a wanted]] [[BestialityIsDepraved animal rapist]]."

* In possibly one of the best of Jim's pranks in a long time, while he is at the dentist, he and Pam get Steve, an actor friend of theirs who is Asian to pretend to be Jim. This '''completely''' freaks Dwight out. He tries to prove he's not Jim by getting a family photo from Pam's desk but is shocked to find instead of picture Asian Jim posing with Pam and their two Asian children!

* "The Injury."

-->''Ryan frantically mimes 'no' to Toby.''

** Then later, when Michael makes it out of the bathroom: "Ryan, who is supposed to be DEAD..."
** DWIGHT DWIGHT DWIGHT DWIGHT DWIGHT DWIGHT DWIGHT DWIGHT DWIGHT
** Jim and the spray bottle.

** Later, at the hospital:
-->'''Michael:''' [filling out intake form] Dwight, what is your middle name?
-->'''Dwight:''' [completely out of it] Danger.

* "Conflict Resolution:" A list of Jim's pranks on Dwight were read out. Also doubles to show how much of a JerkAss Jim could be at times to him and is kind of sad.

* Dwight interrogating Jim after finding a joint in the parking lot.
-->'''Jim:''' I'm just saying you can't be sure that it wasn't you.
-->'''Dwight:''' That's ridiculous. Of course it wasn't me.
-->'''Jim:''' Marijuana is a memory-loss drug, so maybe you just don't remember.
-->'''Dwight:''' I would remember.
-->'''Jim:''' Well how could you remember if it just erased your memory?
-->'''Dwight:''' That's not how it works.
-->'''Jim:''' Now how do you know how it works?
-->'''Dwight:''' ... Knock it off! ''I'm'' interviewing ''you''!
-->'''Jim:''' NO! You said ''I'd'' be conducting the interview when I walked in here. Now, ''EXACTLY'' HOW MUCH POT DID YOU SMOKE?!
* "Casino Night", in which Jim convinces Dwight that he has telekinesis abilities and demonstrates by making the coat-rack behind Pam sway. Dwight watches in awe. Cut to an interview with Pam, who silently holds up an umbrella with a hook handle.

* The episode where Oscar gets outed for being gay. Michael tries to quell the tension by at first hugging Oscar after angering him but then goes the long mile by kissing him. Interestingly, the kiss was improvised and the shock and confusion of the cast members, save Michael, was genuine.
* "Your dentist's name is Crentist..."
* "Game's over, I'm going to kill you for real."

-->'''Michael''': Jim, could you come in here, please?
-->''(Jim walks in)''
-->'''Harvey''': Hi, Jim. I am Harvey, a computer. Jim sucks.
-->'''Michael''': ''(laughing)'' I'm sorry. Oh, wow! That's so rude. I'm sorry, I can't control him.
-->'''Jim''': Yeah, you can.
-->'''Michael''': You know what? Get Pam.
-->'''Jim''': For this?
-->'''Michael'''': Pam!
-->''(Pam walks into Michael's office)''
-->'''Harvey''': Pam, you look very hot today.
-->'''Jim''': Pam, meet Harvey. This is Michael's new friend.
-->'''Pam''': Great.
-->'''Harvey:''' Me so horny. Me love you long tim.
-->'''Pam''': Who's "long Tim"?
-->''(Michael does more annoyed typing)''
-->'''Harvey''': Long time. Me lobe yoy long time.
-->'''Jim''': Oh, well, maybe "Yoy" should bring "long Tim" in one day.
-->''(Michael types furiously)''
-->'''Harvey''': You ruined a funny joke. You get out of my offive.
-->'''Pam''': Okay. Bye, Harvey.
-->''(Michael types some more)''
-->'''Harvey''': ''(long pause)'' Boobs. ''(sniggers at the camera)''
* "Convict":
** Prison Mike. Just... [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4vXx2y7D6U Prison Mike]].
---> "The worst thing about prison was the Dementors. They were flyin' all over the place, and they were scary. And then they'd come down and they'd suck the soul outta ya body, and it ''hoit!"''
*** "I am here to SCARE YOU STRAIGHT!"
*** He tells Ryan "You would be the belle of the ball! Don't drop the soap! DON'T DROP THE SOOOOAP!"
** '''Kevin:''' I had to have Martin explain what he was in prison for three times, because it sounds a lot like what I do here ''every single day''.
* The phone prank on Andy, especially its conclusion.
** Jim’s [[OhCrap reaction]] after Andy punches a hole in the wall. That is the face of a man who realized that he may have gone a little too far.
** There's also Andy's hilarious attempts at wooing Pam, culminating in his singing "Rainbow Connection" in a falsetto voice.
* [[invoked]] In "The Negotiation", Roy [[NightmareFuel/TheOfficeUS attempts to physically attack and possibly kill Jim]] over his association with Pam, which leads [[Awesome/TheOfficeUS Dwight to pepper-spray him, instantly incapacitating him]]. That's not the funny part. The funny part is when Andy [[TheBusCameBack comes back]] from his anger management course and Dwight promptly [[ButtMonkey pepper-sprays him, too]].
-->'''Andy:''' Hey guys, guess who's back- ''[gets pepper-sprayed]'' '''OWWW!! AAAAAGGHHH! OW!''' '''''OH GOD!!!'''''
** Also, the fact that Dwight not only got Roy with the pepper-spray, [[RealityEnsues but also Pam, Jim (who he was saving), and]] ''[[RealityEnsues himself]]'' since in his talking head segment discussing the incident, his face is practically soaked with tears.
** Michael and Jan's salary negotiation.
-->'''Jan:''' First off, Michael, this is a salary negotiation. All matters regarding our personal relationship have to be set aside, are we clear?
-->'''Michael:''' [[ItMakesSenseInContext Bippity-boppity]].
-->'''Jan:''' Right now we can offer you a six-percent raise.
-->'''Michael:''' Six percent? After all we've been through?
-->'''Jan:''' Oh ''God.''
-->'''Michael:''' I got you jade earrings... You wanna play it like this? You give me a good raise, or no more sex. ''[notices Toby making notes]'' What are you writing, perv-ball?!
-->'''Toby:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck ...Just preparing for the deposition.]]
-->'''Toby:''' ''(in a talking head)'' [[CueTheFlyingPigs This may be the first time that]] a male subordinate has attempted to get a modest scheduled raise by threatening to withhold sex from a female superior. It will be a groundbreaking case when it inevitably goes to trial.
* In "Ben Franklin," Michael, going by Todd Packer's definition of "Separate But Equal", offers to hire a male stripper for Phyllis' bachelorette party:

* In "Branch Closing", how Michael breaks the news.
-->'''Michael:''' ''(in an interview)'' The best thing that I can do right now is put on a brave face and be their leader.\\
''(Cut to him in the present)''\\
'''Michael:''' [[ImmediateSelfContradiction It's over. We're all screwed.]]
** Furthermore, soon after he breaks the news, Michael gives the rest of the office [[OhCrapSmile the silliest grin possible.]]
** Jim's latest prank on Dwight: Pretending to be his future self telling him that the coffee will be poisoned at 8am. Of course, Dwight falls for it and slams into Stanley trying to wrench his coffee mug from him.

* A bat getting loose in the office space. Highlights include:
** Stanley immediately leaving the room with his coat over his head and quick "goodbye".
** Jim pranking Dwight by pretending to have been bitten by the bat and slowly turning into a vampire.
** Kelly begging Dwight and Creed not to hurt the bat only to change her tune when it flies towards her.
** Dwight finally trapping the bat in a garbage bag over Meredith's head.
* In "The Cocktail", Jan and Michael have decided to go public with their relationship.
-->'''Jan:''' I need you to sign these, Michael. It’s a waiver of some of your rights. You should read it carefully. It releases the company in the event that our relationship, in your opinion or in reality, interferes with work. You get a copy, I get a copy, and the third copy goes to HR.
-->'''Michael:''' Awesome! I’m gonna get mine framed. I could frame yours too.
-->'''Jan:''' You realize this is a legal document that says you can't sue the company.
-->'''Michael:''' Over our love.
-->'''Jan:''' I’ve never told you that I love you.
-->'''Michael:''' ''[sincerely but obliviously]'' You don't have to, Jan. This contract says it all.
** Jan catches herself doing it when Michael isn't even there.
--->'''Jan:''' Why is this so hard? ''({{beat}})'' ThatsWhatSheSaid. [[GotMeDoingIt Oh my God, what am I saying?]]

** The hilariously out-of-nowhere moment at the end of the ColdOpen when Michael inadverdently hits [[ButtMonkey Meredith]] while driving into the parking lot.

** Michael deliberately[[note]]This moment was almost certainly deliberate, as driving into that lake was too dumb ''even for Michael''. Many are of the opinion that he did it deliberately to prove a ridiculous made-up point about new methods versus old because he was angry at Ryan. Of course, Michael isn't particularly self-aware, so he might even have convinced ''himself'' that it was an accident[[/note]] misunderstanding his GPS and driving his car into Lake Scranton.

* "Branch Wars" is absolutely hilarious. In an effort to keep Stanley in Scranton, Michael and Dwight rope Jim into a trip to Utica to raid the place there...

** Michael and Dwight finding, moving and getting trapped underneath the giant copier. You don't actually see anything, you only get to hear about it through the walkie-talkie, which Jim uses to keep in touch with them while he stays on the lookout.

* "I... declare... BANKRUPTCY!!!"
* With Pam's help, Jim tricking Dwight into thinking that the company's automated ordering service has become sentient.
-->[[AC: What am I?]]
-->[[AC: While you were typing that I searched every database in existence and learned every fact about everything. And mastered the violin. [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Oh, and sold more paper]].]]

* In "Chair Model", Michael demands everyone at the office to set him up with someone they know. Kevin pranks him by giving the number of a "[[{{Slogans}} hot and juicy]] [[{{Mascot}} redhead]]" named [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wendy%27s Wendy]], and this hilarious exchange happens:
---> '''Voice on the phone:''' Wendy’s.
---> '''Michael:''' Hello, Wendy! This is Kevin’s friend, Michael.
---> '''Voice on the phone:''' This isn’t Wendy.
---> '''Michael:''' Oh, I’m sorry. Could you put her on, please?
---> '''Voice on the phone:''' Dude, ''this is a Wendy’s restaurant''.
---> '''Michael:''' ''[mutters]'' Damn it, Kevin... OK, umm... could I just have a frosty and a baked potato, please?
---> '''Voice on the phone:''' You have to come to the restaurant to order food.
---> '''Michael:''' Well, I’ll send somebody to come pick it up. Just have it ready.
---> '''Voice on the phone:''' It’s ready now.
---> '''Michael:''' Well, put it aside. ''[hangs up]''
*** Later on, Pam tells a frustrated Michael that she might have someone for him, to which he retorts: "[[DeadpanSnarker Oh, really? What’s her name? Burger King?]]"

-->'''Oscar:''' (astounded) What?! Why wouldn't you say that to her face?!

---> '''Michael:''' I just have some questions that I was gonna ask. Um... Who do you think you are?
---> '''Toby:''' I'm Toby.
---> '''Michael:''' Yeah. Correct. Um... What gives-what-what gives you the right?

---> '''Michael:''' (ridiculously covers his face from Holly and whispers to Toby) I'll kill you.
---> '''Toby:''' ...I guess everything's okay.

--> '''Michael''': It squeaks when you bang it, [[ThatsWhatSheSaid that's what she said]].

* "BUTTLICKER! OUR PRICES HAVE NEVER BEEN LOWER!"

* Dwight's "fire drill" at the beginning of "Stress Relief" has been called one of the funniest scenes in sitcom history, and it's for a ''damn'' good reason.

-->"STANLEY, BARACK IS PRESIDENT!! YOU ARE ''BLACK'', STANLEY!!!"

** The entire office's experience with the CPR training dummy, starting with Michael's take on the situation:
--->'''Michael:''' No, Rose. [[ComicallyMissingThePoint They are not breathing. ...And they have no arms or legs.]]
--->'''Rose:''' N- That's not part of it.
--->'''Michael:''' Where are they?
*** The CPR trainer then instructs Michael to compress the dummy's chest to "Stayin' Alive" for the correct rhythm; he mistakenly starts up "I Will Survive" instead.
*** Then as the whole session goes to hell, Dwight cuts off the dummy's face and scares everyone by wearing it over his own a la ''Film/{{The Silence of the Lambs}}''.
---->'''[[OnlySaneMan David Wallace]]:''' Can you tell me why you had to cut the face off the dummy?
---->'''Dwight:''' I didn't think it was very realistic in the movie, and it turns out: it's ''pretty'' realistic.
** Honestly, '''all''' of "Stress Relief" is hysterical, but the "roast of Michael Scott" is especially worth a mention.
*** This line from Oscar leading up to the roast, ''especially'' due to his actor Oscar Nunez's completely deadpan delivery:

*** Dwight's '''vicious''' TheReasonYouSuckSpeech to Michael after he accidentally insults Dwight [[{{Irony}} when he's protesting the roast]], angrily calling Michael "a pathetic little man who has no woman and no land."

** And rounding out the episode, Michael's absolutely hysterical revenge-roast of everyone in the office:
--->'''Michael:''' Jim, you're six-eleven and you weigh ninety pounds, Gumby has a better body than you. Boom, roasted. Dwight, you're a kiss-ass. Boom, roasted. Pam, you failed art school, boom, roasted. Meredith, you've slept with so many guys you're starting to look like one. Boom, roasted. Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke or a dumb joke. Boom, roasted. Creed, your teeth called: your breath stinks. Boom, roasted. Angela--where's Angela? Oh, there you are, I didn't see you behind that ''grain of rice.'' Boom, roasted! Stanley! You crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom, roasted. ''[[ActuallyPrettyFunny [Stanley starts laughing like a kazoo] ]]'' Oscar you are... ''[distracted by Stanley, with everyone else also starting to laugh]'' ...Oscar, you're gay! Andy, Cornell called, they think you suck! And you're gayer than Oscar. Boom, roasted!

--> '''Michael:''' "Number one: Holly, you and I are soup snakes". Because... in terms of the soup, we like to... Wait a minute, that doesn't make sense... We're ''soulmates''.

* When Michael fell into the koi pond and everyone cuts him up about it. "Hey Michael did you [[WesternAnimation/FindingNemo Find Nemo]]?" "Don't you mean Koi Story?" "When you fell in did you flounder?"
** Jim noting that what made the whole event especially humiliating wasn't that Michael fell into the koi pond... it was ''[[EpicFail how long it took him to get out of the koi pond.]]''

* Creed arriving late during a murder mystery party. Upon being told he’s a murder suspect, Creed makes an excuse to leave the room and is then seen fleeing to his car and getting out of there.

** Also, when he shows the cameras that he has various wigs for impersonating the office staff, including Kevin, Phyllis, and Stanley.

* Jim's reaction to finding out that Michael slept with Pam's mom in "The Lovers".
-->'''Jim''': Who's the lucky lady?
-->'''Michael''': Pam's mom. Helene, from the wedding.
-->'''Jim''': ''(smiling)'' You're messing with me. You did ''not'' have sex with Pam's mom!
-->'''Michael''': Big time.
-->'''Jim''': ''(still smiling)'' What kind of car does she drive?
-->'''Michael''': She drives a green Camry--
-->'''Jim''': ''([[OhCrap stops smiling and promptly dies inside]])'' [[CensoredForComedy *bleep*]]

--->'''Michael:''' I mean, [Helene] is right on my way home from work--
--->'''Jim:''' ''(practically shouting)'' THEN TAKE A DIFFERENT WAY HOME, MAN!!

-->'''Jim''': Five to seven minutes. ''(tosses book aside)'' Five to seven minutes. ''(tosses book aside)'' Six minutes. Different, but ''not really.''

* Dwight attempting to give Jim and Pam a "police escort" to the hospital when they're about to have a baby. It results in Dwight getting pulled over as the real police officer says, "You're not supposed to impersonate a police officer. [[OhNoNotAgain Please don't make this difficult, Dwight.]]" On top of that, Dwight is throwing a sword and battle axe out the window.

* Michael initially thinks Sabre is pronounced "Sah-bray" (instead of "say-ber", like the sword) and this pronunciation spreads throughout the office. Erin and Andy perform a parody of "[[Music/MileyCyrus Party In The USA]]" to celebrate the merger, but so many of the rhymes are based on it being pronounced "sah-bray" that the song quickly falls apart when they try to use the proper pronunciation.
* After Erin and Andy share their first kiss, there's a beat just before Andy starts ''{{Scatting}}'' [[MoodWhiplash inexplicably.]] And then stops.
* Erin completely losing it at a restaurant when Michael tells her Andy was engaged to Angela. Suddenly Michael is the normal one for once:
-->'''Michael:''' What are you doing?
-->'''Erin:'''(covering her face with her hair)"In the foster home my hair was my room."

-->'''Meredith:''' It's coming off either way.

** And it all turns out to have been for naught anyway as [[spoiler: Angela winds up bearing a Schrute fruit in season 8. Fortunately, Dwight's had a change of heart by this point and is absolutely ''ecstatic'' to learn that Phillip is, in fact, his son.]]

* Nepotism has almost the entire office do a lipdub to "Nobody Can Do" by Human Beanz. Amusingly, Angela isn't willing to be a part of the video, but [[StraightMan Stanley]] (albeit somewhat reluctantly, only telling Toby that he's behind) and [[NotSoAboveItAll Dwight]] are.
** While everyone does a brief act in the lipdub, Dwight reveals himself by jumping out of the hallway, biting off a stuffed animal's head, and finally showing off his knife.
* In "Counseling," a wronged Dwight tries to re-enact Vivian's SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome from ''Film/PrettyWoman''. The gang also tries to "Pygmalion" him into a gentleman, only for it to fall apart. Then we see ''why'' he was kicked out of the store.
--> It was BEET JUICE!

** Becomes less funny when Jim ends up with a massive nosebleed afterwards.
* In "PDA", Pam and Jim get drunk at a champagne brunch and spend all episode trying to find a place to have sex in the office (they and Kevin are the only ones who haven't). They succeed, emerging with ruffled hair and smirks.
* Todd Packer in ''Threat Level Midnight'': "If doing ''The Scarn'' is gay -- ''then I'm the biggest queer on Earth!''" In the film cut of the episode, he said [[BrickJoke earlier]], "''The Scarn''? Sounds gay."
** Pretty much this entire episode is nonstop hilarity.

** And that's how you do the Scarn!

** His original idea was to pour gasoline in the parking lot to write out "will you marry me?", and then light it on fire... [[EveryCarIsAPinto ''right next to everyone's cars'']]. Fortunately, Pam stops him just in time.
* In "Michael's Last Dundies" Michael shows a short film where he impersonates Angela, Phyllis and Jim. The last one he interprets as wearing an earring and having a hipster personality:

* In "Goodbye Michael" the fact that Michael's last, barely audible line is "ThatsWhatSheSaid."

** In the cold open to this episode, Dwight has elevated his desk so that he can stand at work at all times, which Jim goads him into committing to constantly after Dwight brags about it too much. Of course, the standing becomes difficult to stick with, so Dwight tries to get away with sitting on a stilt hidden in his trousers. Jim notices this, walks up to Dwight and puts a hand on him.
--> '''Dwight:''' Don't-!
--> '''Jim:''' Because you're sitting?
--> '''Dwight:''' ''(Nervously)'' Standing.
--> '''Jim:''' ''(Quietly)'' You know I have to do this.
--> '''Dwight:''' [[GracefulLoser ...I know.]]
--> ''Jim pushes Dwight and he falls to the floor''

* In "Trivia" the whole office ends up trailing Oscar to a Gay Bar to take part in a Trivia Night in order to meet their quarterly quota. Andy suggests that the Office break up into three teams "Team A," "Team Backup" and "Just here to have fun," but doesn't specifically assign anyone because everyone should natural know what their placement is. This actually goes off without a hitch except Kevin obliviously tries to join Team A with Andy, Jim, Darryl, and Ryan leading to a really awkward staredown with Andy.

** Also in "Jury Duty," Jim's "And then 3 more days happened..."
* Jim's prank in the ColdOpening of "Tallahassee". Figuring that Dwight was going to let himself into Jim's room to wake him up, Jim's sets up an elaborate crime scene in it, complete with an open money briefcase and "IT WAS DWIGHT" hastily scrawled on a door in red. Dwight and Erin's expressions of sheer OhCrap were truly a sight to behold, especially when [[PeekABooCorpse Jim himself falls out of a closet next to them.]]

* In "Fundraiser", Dwight misunderstands the silent auction and believes the purpose is to guess the price and you'll get the item for free. He simultaneously realises his mistake as Jim realises what's just happened when it's announced he donated over $34'000, so of course, Jim seizes the moment and calls for Dwight to make a speech. Dwight awkwardly fumbles into condemning everyone making such a big deal about money before [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere making a break for it.]] Probably most amazing of all was that ''Kevin'' was the one to catch on early to this.
--->'''Kevin:''' ''(grinning)'' I guess ''he's'' the stupid guy in the office, huh? Cause, up till now, we didn't have one.

---->'[[CrossesTheLineTwice Stanley tried to die just to get away!]]''

** The SeinfeldianConversation over whether or not Hillary Swank is hot or not.

---->''We're stuck listening to you all day
---->[[CrossesTheLineTwice Stanley tried to die just to get away!]]''

-->'''Michael:''' Jim, you're six-eleven and you weigh ninety pounds, Gumby has a better body than you. Boom, roasted. Dwight, you're a kiss-ass. Boom, roasted. Pam, you failed art school, boom, roasted. Meredith, you've slept with so many guys you're starting to look like one. Boom, roasted. Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke or a dumb joke. Boom, roasted. Creed, your teeth called: your breath stinks. Boom, roasted. Angela--where's Angela? Oh, there you are, I didn't see you behind that ''grain of rice.'' Boom, roasted! Stanley! You crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom, roasted. ''[[ActuallyPrettyFunny [Stanley starts laughing like a kazoo] ]]'' Oscar you are... ''[distracted by Stanley, with everyone else also starting to laugh]'' ...Oscar, you're gay! Andy, Cornell called, they think you suck! And you're gayer than Oscar. Boom, roasted!

** Stanley's hilariously bleak yet accurate assessment after he learns that he will likely have another heart attack unless he learns how to lower his stress levels... and he's working at ''[[DysfunctionJunction Dunder Mifflin]].

** Toby's entire Exit Interview is hilarious because Michael has been looking forward to reaming Toby during the meeting. But he also wants to impress Holly, so when she sits in on the meeting he's left hilariously confused, trying to read his angry questions in a nicer way.

* After Dwight boasts that he does not waste any time at work, Jim carries around a stopwatch to keep track of any time not spent on work related activity. It culminates with him discussing ''Series/BattlestarGalactica2003'', and deliberately gushing about things like "Klingons" and "Wookies", and tells Andy that it's "practically a shot-for-shot remake" of the original. Dwight is struggling with every fiber of his being to focus on his work.

*** This line from Oscar leading up to the roast, ''especially'' due to his smug grin coupled with his actor Oscar Nunez's completely deadpan delivery:

*** Dwight's '''vicious''' TheReasonYouSuckSpeech to Michael after he accidentally insults Dwight protesting the roast, angrily calling Michael "a pathetic little man who has no woman and no land."

---->We're stuck listening to you all day
---->[[CrossesTheLineTwice Stanley tried to die just to get away!]]
** And rounding out the episode, Michael's revenge-roast of everyone in the office is absolutely hysterical:
-->'''Michael:''' Jim, you're six-eleven and you weigh ninety pounds, Gumby has a better body than you. Boom, roasted. Dwight, you're a kiss-ass. Boom, roasted. Pam, you failed art school, boom, roasted. Meredith, you've slept with so many guys you're starting to look like one. Boom, roasted. Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke or a dumb joke. Boom, roasted. Creed, your teeth called: your breath stinks. Boom, roasted. Angela--where's Angela? Oh, there you are, I didn't see you behind that ''grain of rice.'' Boom, roasted! Stanley! You crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom, roasted. ''[[ActuallyPrettyFunny [Stanley starts laughing like a kazoo] ]]'' Oscar you are... ''[distracted by Stanley, with everyone else slowly starting to also laugh]'' ...Oscar, you're gay! Andy, Cornell called, they think you suck! And you're gayer than Oscar. Boom, roasted!

--->'''Kelly:''' I swallowed a tape worm last night. It's going to grow up to three feet inside of me, and then it eats all of my food so that I don't get fat. And then after three months, I take some medicine, and then I pass it. Creed sold it to me. It's from Mexico.
--->'''Creed:''' That wasn't a tapeworm.
* Midway through "Weight Loss", Jim notes in a talking head that Michael is doing so well with Holly, which he says is because Holly is kind of a major dork. Cut to Michael and Holly [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WE4iJ4JF1IE rapping in the warehouse]].
* Lecture Circuit: “SAYUWS. [[Film/ThePrincessBride SAYUWS IS WOT BWINGS US TUGEVAAAAA TUDAAAAYYY]].”
* Company Picnic: Michael has prepared a handwritten list of reasons he and Holly should get back together, and is planning to tell her at the right moment - he reads an example to the camera, but can't quite decipher his own handwriting:

*** It's also worth noting that ''[[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Dwight]]'', of all people, is the OnlySaneMan during the entire driving-into-lake entire sequence.

-->'''Harvey''': ''(long pause)'' Boobs.

* In "The Negotiation", Roy [[NightmareFuel/TheOfficeUS attempts to physically attack and possibly kill Jim]] over his association with Pam, which leads [[Awesome/TheOfficeUS Dwight to pepper-spray him, instantly incapacitating him]]. That's not the funny part. The funny part is when Andy [[TheBusCameBack comes back]] from his anger management course and Dwight pepper-sprays him, too.
--> '''Andy:''' Hey guys, guess who's back- ''[gets pepper-sprayed]'' '''OWWW!! AAAAAGGHHH! OW!''' '''''OH GOD!!!'''''
** Also, the fact that Dwight not only got Roy with the pepper-spray, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent but also Pam, Jim (who he was saving), and]] ''[[FunnyBackgroundEvent himself]]'' since in his talking head segment discussing the incident, his face is practically soaked with tears.

-->'''Jan:''' Oh God.
-->'''Michael:''' I got you jade earrings... You wanna play it like this? You give me a good raise, or no more sex. ''[notices Toby making notes]'' What are you writing, perv-ball?
-->'''Toby:''' Just preparing for the deposition.
-->'''Toby (talking head):''' This may be the first time that a male subordinate has attempted to get a modest scheduled raise by threatening to withhold sex from a female superior. It will be a groundbreaking case when it inevitably goes to trial.

-->'''Angela:''' No. A man is not going to ''remove his clothes'' in this office. \\

** Jim was supposed to hire the male stripper. He hired a Benjamin Franklin impersonator instead. He then tells Dwight that this is, in fact, the real Benjamin Franklin, which leads to two absolutely hilarious scenes of Dwight interrogating said impersonator to prove that Jim is messing with him, especially when said impersonator happens to answer all his questions correctly.

-->'''Michael (in an interview)''': The best thing that I can do right now is put on a brave face and be their leader.
--> (Cut to him in the present)
-->'''Michael''': It's over. We're all screwed.
*** Soon after he breaks the news, Michael wears the silliest grin on his face.

*** The sumo fight when Stanley roars and attacks Jim is also hilarious.

** TheStinger, in which (almost) the whole bus sings the opening theme of ''WesternAnimation/TheFlintstones'', Michael even bellowing [[SayMyName WILMAAAAAAAAA!]] at the end.

--->'''Jan:''' Why is this so hard? (''{{beat}}'') ThatsWhatSheSaid. Oh my God, what am I saying?
* "Creed is eating an apple. I found a potato"

* From "Fun Run":
-->'''Michael: '''I’m not superstitious, but I’m… I'm a little stitious.
* "I... declare... BANKRUPTCY!"

--->[[AC: What am I?]]
** ''While you were typing that I searched every database in existence and learned every fact about everything. And mastered the violin. Oh, and sold more paper.''

* Michael deliberately misunderstanding his GPS and driving his car into Lake Scranton.
-->"Computers are about trying to murder you in a lake."
** Deliberately?
*** Driving into that lake was too dumb even for Michael. Many are of the opinion that he did it deliberately to prove a ridiculous made-up point about new methods versus old, because he was angry at Ryan. Of course, Michael isn't particularly self-aware, so he might even have convinced ''himself'' that it was an accident.
** From the same episode, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TuYag60_-8 "WHERE ARE THE TURTLES?!?!"]]
** As well as:
---> '''Dwight''': I'm losing control of my bladder!
---> '''Jim''': Oh my God. Oh my God. Karen is back.
---> '''Michael''': Take her to a motel. Make love to her, Jim.
---> '''Jim''': No, I'm not doing that.
** In "Chair Model", Michael demands everyone at the office to set him up with someone they know. Kevin pranks him by giving the number of a "[[{{Slogans}} hot and juicy]] [[{{Mascot}} redhead]]" named [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wendy%27s Wendy]], and this hilarious exchange happens:

* Michael's goodbye present for Toby. Also that he has so many lying around in his car for some reason.

---> '''Toby:''' I guess everything's okay

* The season four blooper reel where Michael reveals that he ordered the pizzas from the bad pizza place and the entire cast ''freaks out'' (Oscar REALLY gets into it- he looks like he's having some sort of seizure).

*** What made it for me, is that if you didn't know it was a blooper, it looks like everyone breaks down in laughter at the sheer absurdity of that idea.
* Kelly's [[strike:trash]] smack-talk to Pam over Darryl owning Jim at ping-pong.
--> Your boyfriend's so weak, he needs steroids just to '''watch''' baseball!
--> Were Jim's parents first-cousins who also sucked at ping-pong?
* "OH GOD...MY NIPPLES..IT'S STARTING!"
* In the season 4 episode, "Dunder Mifflin Infinity," Kelly tells the now-corporate Ryan that she is pregnant with his baby. This reveal is immediately followed by a talking head where Kelly just shakes her head to the camera.
* Jan and Michael's dinner party with guests Jim and Pam and Andy and Angela which reaches ''Theatre/WhosAfraidOfVirginiaWoolf'' level awkwardness.
** Jan playing for them a song by her former teenage assistant Hunter and his band "The Hunted":
--->''You took me by the hand
--->Made me a man
--->That one night(One night)
--->You made everything all ri-i-ight..."
*** Even better is how, while everyone else is rightfully disturbed by this, Jan dances sensually while Andy very clearly enjoys the song while entirely missing the point.
** Pam's reaction to Dwight and his babysitter showing up. She said in a loud whisper "Awesome!"
** While giving Jim and Pam a tour, Jan shows off her and Michael's bedroom. Jan quickly folds up a camera on a tripod while Pam gives a WTF look.
** Michael Scott is horrible at Charades.
** Michael shows Jim and Pam his new plasma TV set. It's a ridiculously tiny screen hung in the wall, and Michael is only able to watch something by standing right in front of it. He then shows off [[SarcasmMode an incredibly useful feature]] to get more space in case there are many guests in the room: folding the wall mount to move the screen a couple of inches back. ''Voilà''!
*** The blooper reel for that scene is even funnier, with everyone (especially John Krasinski) being unable to control their laughter (at one point, Steve Carell quips that they're never going to finish the episode- and then promptly ruins the next take by cracking up ''himself''). Even in the final cut, they can barely resist it.
** To get himself and Pam out of the party early, Jim lies about getting a call from his landlord that his apartment flooded so they need to leave. Michael tells them only Jim needs to go and Pam can stay:
--->'''Jim:''' ....That’s true. Dinner sounded delicious. [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere Pam I’ll see you at home, thank you so much.]]\\
'''Pam:''' ''(trying to hide her fury)'' [[TranquilFury Oh Jim, I don’t think you’re going to abandon this party here all by itself!]]\\
'''Jim:''' ''(putting on his jacket)'' I don’t know because I everything I own is there-\\
'''Pam:''' You can buy new stuff but you can’t buy a new party.\\
'''Michael:''' That’s true, that’s a great point. Come on down here. ''(takes Jim's jacket off him as Jim glares at Pam)'' Sit down on that couch and be amongst friends and we are not going to think about all your stuff being destroyed, all right.
** The dinner party culminates with Michael and Jan getting in a huge fight, and Michael screaming "That's what she said!" at the top of his lungs. This would be dramatic, but Steve Carell has one of the funniest screams on TV.
* In "Money", when Jim and Pam are driving up to Schrute Farms, Mose starts running alongside their car, for no discernible reason. It kind of freaks Pam out.
** One of the theme rooms at Schrute Farms is "Irrigation". It just has random bits of pipes stuck on all the walls.
* "Branch Wars" is absolutely hilarious. In an effort to keep Stanley in Scranton, Michael and Dwight rope Jim into a trip to Utica to raid the place there...
** Their disguise consists of a warehouse uniform (a female one for Jim) and a ''fake mustache''. Just... [[https://i.imgur.com/oMArTJB.png take a look for yourself.]]
** Things start taking a turn for the funny even before they arrive- Dwight gets the [[SarcasmMode bright idea]] to pee in an empty soda can in a ''moving vehicle'' and [[GroinAttack ends up cutting his penis on the lid as a result]].
** Michael and Dwight finding, moving and getting trapped underneath the giant copier. You don't actually see anything, you only get to hear about it through the walkie-talkie, which Jim uses to keep in touch with them while he stays on the lookout.
*** "I'm losing control of my bladder!"
--> '''Michael''': Leave us, Jim! Leave us! Save yourself!
--> '''Dwight''': No! Don't leave us. Help us. We need help, Jim.
--> '''Jim''': Okay, first of all, stop using my name.
** Then Karen, Jim's ex who is the regional manager at Utica, spots Jim at the parking lot. Michael asks him to distract her, while still wrestling with the giant copier.
---> '''Michael:''' Take her to a motel. Make love to her.\\
'''Jim:''' No, I'm not doing that!\\
'''Michael:''' Just say you want to get back together.\\
'''Jim:''' No! I am ''not'' doing that...\\
'''Michael:''' It doesn't have to mean anything. Just... do it for Stanley. Come on, Jim, just climb on top of her and think of Stanley.
** At the same time that conversation is going on, Jim does everything he can to stay out of Karen's sight, including telling the camera crew to stay down. When they don't listen, Jim makes this hilarious "What the hell is wrong with you?!" gesture, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent while Karen already appears in the background]].
*** Meanwhile, Michael might be dying.
---->'''Michael:''' If this is it for me, promise me something... [[SkewedPriorities Host the Dundies]].
* In "Job Fair," Michael tries to convince a student to take an internship at Dunder Mifflin, even though he flatly rejected him earlier, and he makes comments Pam's office romances that force her to leave.
-->'''Michael:''' Also, I would ''never'' say this to her face, but she's a wonderful person and a gifted artist.
-->'''Oscar:''' (astounded) What?! Why wouldn't you say that to her face?!
** In the same episode, Andy driving a golf cart into a sand pit.
* In "Local Ad," Andy tries, and fails, to remember the Kit-Kat Jingle, thinking it's for applesauce, Chrysler cars, football cream, before finally settling on Fancy Feast.
** The needlessly surreal commercial that Michael and the Scranton create for Dunder Mifflin, culminating in the immortal line "Limitless paper in a paperless world."
** Darryl's Dunder-Mifflin theme song.

* When Michael finds out [[SitcomArchNemesis Toby]] has [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umDr0mPuyQc returned]].
* Dwight arrives at the office to find every one of his possessions wrapped in Christmas wrapping paper. He gives Jim an annoyed look and says how easy it will be to undo. As he says this, he tosses his briefcase onto the desk and sits in his chair...only for it to collapse. The desk and chair weren't covered in wrapping paper, they were ''made'' of wrapping paper.
* Jim attaching a suspicious looking red wire to the back of Dwight's computer, leading to a hilarious visual gag with Dwight literally ''climbing a telephone pole while looking for the end of the wire''.
-->'''Jim:''' ''(dismissively)'' Oh, he'll be fine, I already made it up there and I was good.
* After Dwight boasts that he does not waste any time at work, Jim carries around a stopwatch to keep track of any time not spent on work related activity. It culminates with him discussing ''Series/BattlestarGalactica2003'', and deliberately gushing about things like "Klingons" and "Wookies", and tells Andy that it's "practically a shot-for-shot remake" of the original. Dwight is struggling with every fiber of his being to focus on his work.

* A subtle gag in "Frame Toby". The guys Michael buys the "drugs" from are named Gino and Leo. Their actors are named Lee Eisenberg and Gene Stupnitsky, respectively. Their characters names are basically each other's first names with an "o" on the end.
** At the end of the episode, Dwight describes his "perfect crime". It's something else.
--> '''Dwight:''' I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say "no". We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son, and he's the chief of police. (This is where the story gets interesting.) I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. [[BaitAndSwitch I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin.]] ''That's'' where I stashed the chandelier.
* Andy and Dwight's duel in ''The Duel.'' What could have been a really horrifying story was PlayedForLaughs quite successfully. The kicker being the office's realization that Andy was going to successfully run over Dwight by keeping his Prius under 5 MPH, rendering it silent - to which Oscar, impressed, noted that his old wingman 'deserved the win,' to general agreement.

--> '''Michael:''' Oh my GOD! Okay, it's happening! Everyone stay calm. Stay calm! STAY F**KING CALM!! ''EVERYBODY JUST F**king CALM DOWN!!''
--> '''Michael:''' [[ImmediateSelfContradiction Okay, we're trapped, everyone for himself!]]
--> '''Andy:''' THE FIRE'S SHOOTING AT US!
--> '''Angela:''' Pull me up!
--> '''Oscar:''' You're too heavy!
--> '''Angela:''' I only weigh eighty-two pounds! Save Bandit! ''(throws her cat up into the ceiling; cat plummets to the ground with an angry yowl)''
** Michael to Stanley while he's having a heart attack:
-->"STANLEY, BARACK IS PRESIDENT! YOU'RE BLACK STANLEY!
** Followed by Michael trying to force his wallet into Stanley's mouth to keep him from "swallowing his tongue."

** Honestly, '''all''' of "Stress Relief" is hysterical, but Michael's revenge-roast of everyone in the office is especially worth a mention:
--> '''Michael:''' "Jim, you're six-eleven and you weigh ninety pounds, Gumby has a better body than you. Boom, roasted. Dwight, you're a kiss-ass. Boom, roasted. Pam, you failed art school, boom, roasted. Meredith, you've slept with so many guys you're starting to look like one. Boom, roasted. Kevin, I can't decide between a fat joke or a dumb joke. Boom, roasted. Creed, your teeth called: your breath stinks. Boom, roasted. Angela--where's Angela? Oh, there you are, I didn't see you behind that ''grain of rice.'' Boom, roasted! Stanley! You crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom, roasted. ''[[ActuallyPrettyFunny [Stanley starts laughing] ]]'' Oscar you are... ''[distracted by Stanley]'' ...Oscar, you're gay! Andy, Cornell called, they think you suck! And you're gayer than Oscar. Boom, roasted!"
*** It's worth noting that in this scene, Stanley laughs like a kazoo.
** Michael's experience with a CPR training dummy.
-->'''Michael:''' No, Rose. [[ComicallyMissingThePoint They are not breathing. ...And they have no arms or legs.]]
-->'''Rose:''' N- That's not part of it.
-->'''Michael:''' Where are they?
** The CPR trainer then instructs Michael to compress the dummy's chest to "Stayin' Alive" for the correct rhythm; he mistakenly starts up "I Will Survive" instead.
** Then as the whole session goes to hell, Dwight cuts off the dummy's face and scares everyone by wearing it over his own a la ''Film/{{The Silence of the Lambs}}''.
-->'''David Wallace:''' Can you tell me why you had to cut the face off the dummy?
-->'''Dwight:''' I didn't think it was very realistic in the movie, and it turns out: it's ''pretty'' realistic.
** The "roast of Michael Scott" is also absolutely hysterical.

'''Pam:''' ''(trying to hide her fury)'' Oh Jim, I don’t think you’re going to abandon this party here all by itself!\\

** Things start taking a turn for the funny even before they arrive- Dwight gets the [[SarcasmMode bright idea]] to pee in an empty soda can in a ''moving vehicle'' and ends up cutting his penis on the lid as a result.

** At the same time that conversation is going on, Jim does everything he can to stay out of Karen's sight, including telling the camera crew to stay down. When they don't listen, Jim makes this hilarious "what the hell is wrong with you?" gesture, while Karen already appears in the background.

---->'''Michael:''' If this is it for me, promise me something... Host the Dundies.

-->'''Oscar:''' (astounded) What?! Why wouldn't you say that to her face?

** "Limitless paper in a paperless world."

* Dwight giving Angela an ultimatum to either break up with Andy or [[PunctuatedForEmphasis "say goodbye...to all...this"]] while pointing dramatically at his crotch.

* When Michael finds out [[ButtMonkey Toby]] has [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umDr0mPuyQc returned]].

* When Jim attaches a suspicious looking red wire to the back of Dwight's computer, leading to a hilarious visual gag.
* After Dwight boasts that he does not waste any time at work, Jim carries around a stopwatch to keep track of any time not spent on work related activity. It culminates with him discussing The Remake of Battlestar Galactica, and deliberately gushing about things like "Klingons" and "Wookies", and tells Andy that it's "practically a shot-for-shot remake" of the original. Dwight is struggling with every fiber of his being to focus on his work.

--> '''Dwight:''' I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say "no". We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son, and he's the chief of police. (This is where the story gets interesting.) I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.

--> '''Michael:''' Oh my GOD! Okay, it's happening! Everyone stay calm. Stay calm! STAY F**KING CALM!! ''EVERYBODY JUST F**king CALM DOWN''!!
--> '''Michael:''' Okay, we're trapped, everyone for himself!

* Near the beginning of Niagara, we see that Michael has tied cans and painted "GOING TO A WEDDING" onto his car. Later, as he leaves with Dwight for the wedding, we find that the cans were still full; they bounce along and explode, showering the street and parked cars with soda.

-->'''Jim (smiling)''': You're messing with me. You did not have sex with Pam's mom.

-->'''Jim (still smiling)''': What kind of car does she drive?

-->'''Jim''': [[CensoredForComedy *bleep*]] '''(no longer smiling)'''
** It gets him so mad that he cusses Toby out when the latter just tries to say hi.
* Pam utters a BigNo after discovering Michael is sleeping with her mother. Made funnier by a break; in this case, she runs out of the office in a BigNo, and the show soon cuts to a commercial break and upon return, she's still in the midst of her BigNo in the parking lot.

* "Frazzled" Jim when Pam is going into labor and refusing to go to the hospital. The best moment was when her contractions were coming within 5 to 7 minutes and she still refused to go to the hospital. Jim holed up in a hallway going through motherhood books.

*** And then getting subsequently banned from Chili's due to being overly drunk (which was [[https://mashable.com/2017/02/07/pam-beesly-chilis/ canonically repealed]] in 2017).