History Funny / TheFrighteners

* Agent Dammers revealing his bare chest full of scars? That's scary. But on television, the scars are cut out, making it look like he's only showing his bare chest. So it makes him look delusional when he says "[[LargeHam My body is a map of pain!]]"

* Frank spraying bug spray into Stuart's face, which melts.

** Earlier on, Dammers putting a swim ring on his driver seat has some [[ToiletHumor implications about his caboose]].

-->'''Ray''': Oh! Budzo! My Budzo! My Budzo! ''[yelling after Frank as he drives off]'' I got your license plate number, YOU BASTARD!!!

-->'''Cyrus''': Man, I hate that trunk!
-->'''Frank''': I don't want you guys spreading your ectoplasmic muck all over the car seat.
-->'''Cyrus''': Well, ain't that a bitch? The ectoplasm's the only thing sticky enough to hold the damn car together! Look, Frank, I'm sorry 'bout your [[TheAllegedCar pus-yellow, piece-of-shit Volvo]], but we ain't riding in the damn trunk no more, you understand? We would like to cruise with some style, man!

-->'''Frank''': Hey, Stuart, in or out, huh?

-->'''Cyrus''': Y'know, if I wanted to get shot at every day, I'd move my black ass to Los Angeles! ''[disappears]''

** His death scene warrants a mention. His response to the advancing Reaper? "Who in the hell are you?! Sound off like you got a pair!" When the Reaper then draws his scythe, Hiles immediately shifts into combat gear... only to be swiftly cut down by the Reaper.

-->'''Judge:''' I like it when they lie still like that!

* For a nice bit of BlackComedy, Bartlett gleefully saying he can't wait to tell Ted Bundy that he outdid him in his BodyCountCompetition, and then complaining about Andrei Chikatilo (the "Russian cannibal creep" mentioned in the quote below) bragging about how many people he killed in life.
-->'''Bartlett''': That Russian cannibal creep is going around telling people he did fifty-plus! ''[groans]'' That reflects badly on the both of us, Patty! That title should be held by an American!

* Cyrus pulling Stuart out of the front door, commenting that he's "uptight," and Stuart hitting the wall afterwards.

--->'''Cyrus''': You just gotta go up to him, look him in the eye, and say "Hey, Frank... [[SuddenlyShouting GIMME WHAT I WANT OR I'MMA BUST YO ASS!]]"

--->'''Cyrus''': Nuh-uh. [[UsefulNotes/KuKluxKlan Ain't gonna be no white sheet]], brah.

* When Cyrus and Stuart are about to haunt a wealthy woman's house and they see a woman walking by, they quickly avert their eyes and fall quiet as the woman passes by. Bear in mind that these guys are ''ghosts'' and invisible to regular people.

* Agent Dammers revealing his bare chest full of scars? That's scary. But on television, the scars are cut out, making it look like he's only showing his bare chest. So it makes him look delusional when he says "''[[LargeHam My body is a map of pain!]]''..."

!!Meta
* A behind-the-scenes one: Apparently, any time Creator/MichaelJFox tried to say "Judge!", he said "[[Franchise/BackToTheFuture Doc!]]" instead.

--->'''Chi [=McBride=]''': ''[with a Scottish accent]'' Stuart cannae take no more, Cap'n!

* When Frank informs him that his services have a hefty charge, Ray, who's nursing a head wound, makes [[{{Angrish}} an outraged sound]], but Lucy, standing behind Frank, silently tells him to calm down. Frank then offers to lower the price; when Ray hesitates, Lucy angrily mouths at him to "DO IT!" He finally gives in.

--->'''Cyrus''': You just gotta go up to him, look him in the eye, and say "Hey, Frank...[[SuddenlyShouting GIMME WHAT I WANT OR I'MMA BUST YO ASS!]]"

* Frank is accosted by TheGrimReaper (not Bartlett) and scared out of his mind. Then, TheGrimReaper turns out to be...Stuart and Cyrus in disguise. Frank is far from amused, angrily tells the two to never pull that stunt again, and stalks off.

** His death scene warrants a mention. His response to the advancing Reaper? "Who in the hell are you?! Sound off like you got a pair!" When the Reaper then draws his scythe, Hiles immediately shifts into combat gear...only to be swiftly cut down by the Reaper.

* Agent Milton Dammers has...issues:

* Frank, as a ghost, tackles the Reaper in defense of Lucy who's being held captive by Dammers. The Reaper gets his scythe and advances on Frank...only to be hit by a truck, screeching all the while.

* Frank running over one of Ray's garden gnome while backing his car out of the Lynskeys' lawn. Ray's damn near distraught over the loss of his garden gnome.

** While kitchen tools are floating through the air, Ray gets conked in the head by a pan (or something) immediately after mentioning "It's nothing that the police can't handle!"

** In his first scene, Hiles shifts uniforms within a span of at least ten seconds while bullying Frank and chewing him out for taking advantage of ghosts.
** His death scene warrants a mention. His response to the advancing Reaper? "Who in the hell are you?! Sound off like you got a pair!" When the Reaper then draws his scythe, Hiles shifts into combat gear...only to be swiftly cut down by the Reaper.

* Frank running over Ray's garden gnome while backing his car out of the Lynskeys' lawn, and Ray's damn near distraught over the loss of his garden gnome.
-->'''Ray''': Oh! Budzo! My Budzo! My Budzo! (''yelling after Frank as he drives off'') I got your license plate number, YOU BASTARD!!!

-->'''Cyrus''': Y'know, if I wanted to get shot at every day, I'd move my black ass to Los Angeles! (''disappears'')

** His [[spoiler:death scene]] warrants a mention. [[spoiler:His response to the advancing Reaper? "Who in the hell are you?! Sound off like you got a pair!" When the Reaper then draws his scythe, Hiles shifts into combat gear...only to be swiftly cut down by the Reaper.]]

-->'''Dammers:''' (''to Sheriff Perry'') You are invading my territorial bubble!

--> '''Judge:''' I like it when they lie still like that!

* Frank, [[spoiler:as a ghost]], tackles [[spoiler:the Reaper in defense of Lucy who's being held captive by Dammers. The Reaper gets his scythe and advances on Frank...only to be hit by a truck, screeching all the while]].
* For a nice bit of BlackComedy, [[spoiler:Bartlett gleefully saying he can't wait to tell Ted Bundy that he outdid him in his BodyCountCompetition, and then complaining about Andrei Chikatilo (the "Russian cannibal creep" mentioned in the quote below) bragging about how many people he killed in life]].
-->[[spoiler:'''Bartlett''']]: [[spoiler:That Russian cannibal creep is going around telling people he did fifty-plus! (''groans'') That reflects badly on the both of us, Patty! That title should be held by an American!]]

* Frank is accosted by TheGrimReaper ([[spoiler:not Bartlett]]) and scared out of his mind. Then, TheGrimReaper turns out to be...Stuart and Cyrus in disguise. Frank is far from amused, angrily tells the two to never pull that stunt again, and stalks off.

-->'''Cyrus''': Nuh-uh. [[UsefulNotes/KuKluxKlan Ain't gonna be no white sheet]], brah.

--->'''Chi [=McBride=]''': (''with a Scottish accent'') Stuart cannae take no more, Cap'n!

* Cyrus's rant about Frank's car:

** It gets mentioned later on when Frank is tearing into Stuart and Cyrus, and he tells Stuart that the chicken wasn't scary. Cyrus is heard snickering at this.

* Stuart indignantly saying he's going to give Frank a stern talking-to about his treatment of his employees, only for Frank to call down from upstairs "You talking to me, Stuart?" and Stuart, cowed, to say "No."
** Cyrus then tells Stuart he's not being assertive enough and gives an excellent example of how he should approach their friend/employer. For bonus points, Cyrus's head is illuminated by a lightbulb, making the guy look almost like a Jack O'Lantern (complete with GlowingEyesOfDoom), as he does so.

** When Stuart then enthusiastically suggests trying a white sheet next time, Cyrus [[DisapprovingLook rolls his eyes upward at him]] and delivers this gem:

* When Frank informs him his services have a hefty charge, Ray makes [[{{Angrish}} an outraged sound]], but Lucy, standing behind Frank, silently tells him to calm down. Frank then offers to lower the price; when Ray hesitates, Lucy angrily mouths at him to "DO IT!" He finally gives in.

* When Frank gripes that Cyrus and Stuart didn't bang the toilet seat lid like they were supposed to and that they made him "look like an asshole," Cyrus replies, "We strained our backs lifting that heavy-ass bed, Frank!"

-->'''Cyrus:''' Well, you can pull this, Frank! I'm about to go like Jesse on yo' ass! I'mma find me some other black ghosts, and then organize a march! The African-American Apparition Coalition--the A double-A C. And let me tell you somethin', Frank--there ain't nothing worse than a bunch of ticked-off brothers that's already dead!

* During Stuart and Cyrus' haunting of the Lynskeys' house, Lucy and Ray see a raw chicken walking down the hallway.

* Cyrus pulling Stuart out of the front door, and Stuart hitting the wall afterwards.
* Stuart indignantly saying he's going to give Frank a stern talking-to about his treatment of his employees, only for Frank to call down from upstairs, "You talking to me, Stuart?" and Stuart, cowed, to say "No."

* Frank is accosted by TheGrimReaper ([[spoiler:not Bartlett]]) and scared out of his mind. Then, TheGrimReaper turns out to be...Stuart and Cyrus in disguise. Frank is far from amused, angrily tells the two to never pull that stunt again, and stalks off. When Stuart then enthusiastically suggests trying a white sheet next time, Cyrus [[DisapprovingLook rolls his eyes upward at him]] and delivers this gem:

* Frank spraying buy spray into Stuart's face, which melts.

** Chi [=McBride=] doing a hilarious impression of Scotty.

* For a nice bit of BlackComedy, [[spoiler:Johnny Bartlett gleefully saying he can't wait to tell Ted Bundy that he outdid him in his BodyCountCompetition, and then complaining about Andrei Chikatilo (the "Russian cannibal creep" mentioned in the quote below) bragging about how many people he killed in life]].
-->[[spoiler:'''Johnny''']]: [[spoiler:That Russian cannibal creep is going around telling people he did fifty-plus! (''groans'') That reflects badly on the both of us, Patty! That title should be held by an American!]]

* Cyrus tells Stuart he's not being assertive enough with Frank and gives an excellent example of how he should approach their friend/employer. For bonus points, Cyrus's head is illuminated by a lightbulb, making the guy look almost like a Jack O'Lantern (complete with GlowingEyesOfDoom), as he does so.
-->'''Cyrus''': You just gotta go up to him, look him in the eye, and say "Hey, Frank...[[SuddenlyShouting GIMME WHAT I WANT OR I'MMA BUST YO ASS!]]"

* The hot ghost-on-mummy action scene:
--> '''Judge:''' I like it when they lie still like that!
* Cyrus' rant to Frank after the latter threatens to send him and Stuart back to the cemetery:
-->'''Cyrus:''' Well, you can pull this, Frank! I'm about to go like Jesse on yo' ass! I'mma find me some other black ghosts, and then organize a march! The African-American Apparition Coalition--the A double-A C. And let me tell you somethin', Frank--there ain't nothing worse than a bunch of ticked-off brothers that's already dead!
* Cyrus' rant about Frank's car:

* In the director's cut, Cyrus tells Stuart he's not being assertive enough with Frank and gives an excellent example of how he should approach their friend/employer:
-->'''Cyrus''': You just gotta go up to him, look him in the eye, and say "Hey, Frank...[[SuddenlyShouting GIMME WHAT I WANT OR I'MMA BUST YO ASS!]]"
* "Ah, the ol' express bus to {{Hell}}--no lines, no waitin'!"

* In the director's cut, Frank is in the shower when Cyrus' head appears out of the drain so he can talk to Frank. Frank eventually tells Cyrus he has to pee and he's not getting out the shower. Cyrus promptly vanishes down the drain.
* Also from the director's cut: Frank is accosted by TheGrimReaper ([[spoiler:not Bartlett]]) and scared out of his mind. Then, TheGrimReaper turns out to be...Stuart and Cyrus in disguise. Frank is far from amused, angrily tells the two to never pull that stunt again, and stalks off. When Stuart then enthusiastically suggests trying a white sheet next time, Cyrus [[DisapprovingLook rolls his eyes upward at him]] and delivers this gem:
-->'''Cyrus''': Nuh-uh. Ain't gonna be no white sheet, brah.
* Frank running over Ray's garden gnome while backing his car out of the Lynskeys' lawn, and Ray's damn near distraught over the loss of his garden gnome.
-->'''Ray''': Oh! Budzo! My Budzo! My Budzo! (''yelling after Frank as he drives off'') I got your license plate number, YOU BASTARD!!!
* During Stuart and Cyrus' haunting of the Lynskey household, one of the ghosts causes a Raggedly Ann doll to tug at Lucy. Lucy just screams, but Ray screams, jumps up, grabs a pillow, and starts hitting the doll as it backs away and eventually stops.
** While kitchen tools are floating through the air, Ray gets conked in the head by a pan (or something) immediately after mentioning "It's nothing that the police can't handle!"

* A behind-the-scenes one: Apparently, any time Creator/MichaelJFox tried to say "Judge!", he said "[[Film/BackToTheFuture Doc!]]" instead.

--> '''Judge:''' ''I like it when they lie still like that!''

** Also his rant about Frank's car:

-->'''Frank''': I don't want you guys spreading your ectoplasmic muck all over the carseat.

* In the director's cut, Cyrus tells Stuart he's not being assertive enough with Frank and we get this:

-->'''Creator/MichaelJFox:''' Doc! "Doc?", I did it again! Wrong [[PrecisionFStrike fucking]] movie...
* In the director's cut, Frank is in the shower when Cyrus' head appears out of the drain so he can talk to Frank. Frank eventually tells Cyrus he has to pee and "I'm not getting out the shower." Cyrus goes "Okay" and promptly vanishes down the drain.
* Also from the director's cut: Frank is accosted by TheGrimReaper ([[spoiler:not Bartlett]]) and scared out of his mind. Then, TheGrimReaper turns out to be...Stuart and Cyrus in disguise. Frank is far from amused and stalks off. When Stuart then suggests trying a white sheet next time, Cyrus [[DisapprovingLook rolls his eyes upward at him]] and delivers this gem:

* Frank running over Ray's garden gnome while backing his car out of the Lynskeys' lawn. Ray is not amused; in fact, he's damn near distraught over the loss of his garden gnome.
-->'''Ray''': Oh! Budzo! My Budzo! My Budzo! (''yelling after Frank as he drives off'') I got your license plate number, YOU BASTARD!

-->'''Cyrus:''' Well, you can pull this! I'm about to go like Jesse on yo' ass! I'mma find me some other black ghosts, and then organize a march! The African-American Apparition Coalition--the A double-A C. And let me tell you somethin', Frank--there ain't nothing worse than a bunch of ticked-off brothers that's already dead!

-->'''Cyrus''': Well, ain't that a bitch? The ectoplasm's the only thing sticky enough to hold the damn car together! Look, Frank, I'm sorry 'bout your pus-yellow, piece-of-shit Volvo, but we ain't riding in the damn trunk no more, you understand? We would like to cruise with some style, man!
* In the director's cut (which has 14 minutes of additional footage), Cyrus tells Stuart he's not being assertive enough with Frank and we get this:
-->'''Cyrus''': You just gotta go up to him, look him in the eye and say "Hey, Frank...[[SuddenlyShouting GIMME WHAT I WANT OR I'MMA BUST YO ASS!]]"

* In the director's cut, Frank is in the shower when Cyrus' head appears out of the drain so he can talk to Frank. Frank eventually tells Cyrus he has to pee and "I'm not getting out the shower." Cyrus goes "Okay" and vanishes down the drain.
* Also from the director's cut: Frank is accosted by TheGrimReaper ([[spoiler:not Bartlett]]) and is scared out of his mind. Then, TheGrimReaper turns out to be...Stuart and Cyrus in disguise. Frank is far from amused and stalks off. When Stuart then suggests trying a white sheet next time, Cyrus rolls his eyes upward at him and delivers this gem:
-->Nuh-uh. Ain't gonna be no white sheet, brah.

* During Stuart and Cyrus' haunting of the Lynskey household, one of the ghosts causes a Raggedly Ann doll to tug at Lucy. Lucy just screams, but Ray screams, jumps up, grabs a pillow and starts hitting the doll as it backs away and eventually stops.

-->'''Cyrus''': Well, ain't that a bitch? The ectoplasm's the only thing sticky enough to hold the damn car together! Look, Frank, I'm sorry 'bout your pus-yellow, piece-of-shit Volvo, but we ain't in the damn trunk no more, you understand? We would like to cruise with some style, man!

-->'''Cyrus:''' Well, you can pull this! I'm about to go like Jesse on yo' ass. I'mma find me some other black ghosts, and then organize a march. The African-American Apparition Coalition -- the A double-A C. And let me tell you somethin', Frank -- there ain't nothing worse than a bunch of ticked-off brothers that's already dead!
* "Ah, the ol' express bus to {{Hell}} -- no lines, no waitin'!"
* Agent Milton Dammers has... issues:
-->'''Dammers:''' You are invading my territorial bubble!

* A behind-the-scenes one: Apparently, any time MichaelJFox tried to say "Judge!", he said "[[Film/BackToTheFuture Doc!]]" instead.

* A behind-the-scenes one: Apparently, any time MichaelJFox tried to say "Judge!", he said "[[BackToTheFuture Doc!]]" instead.
----

* The [[HotSkittyOnWailordAction hot ghost-on-mummy action]] scene: