History Funny / PrideAndPrejudice

[[AC:The Novel]]

[[AC: The 1940 Film]]

[[AC: The 1995 Miniseries]]

* In a way, Colin Firth's performance during Darcy's first proposal is this. He just ''cannot'' get started!

* During the ball at Netherfield, when the company has already had to endure Mary's singing, Mr. Collins then volunteers to sing. Mrs. Hurst, who is to accompany him, clearly decides 'You know what? ''' ''No,' '' ''' and proceeds to hammer out a flawless rendition of "Rondo alla Turca," a tune that's impossible for Collins to keep up with; he's left nodding his head foolishly.

* The book's best piece of [[LemonyNarrator Lemony Narration]] comes when Elizabeth runs into her least favorite person, Mr Darcy, during her walk through Rosings Park: "She felt all the perverseness of the mischance that should bring him where no one else was brought; and to prevent its ever happening again, took care to inform him at first, that it was a favourite haunt of hers. How it could occur a second time, therefore, was very odd!"

* During the ball at Netherfield, when the company has already had to endure Mary's singing, Mr. Collins then volunteers to sing. Mrs. Hurst, who is to accompany him, clearly decides 'You know what? ''No,' '' and proceeds to hammer out a flawless rendition of "Rondo alla Turca," a tune that's impossible for Collins to keep up with; he's left nodding his head foolishly.

-->'''Mr Bennet:''' (pointing a poker at her) "No lace! ''No'' lace! I forbid it!"

** The best part? Lady Catherine went right to Darcy and told him ''everything Elizabeth said.'' And Darcy is ''overjoyed''. It "taught me to hope," he says, because if Elizabeth didn't want to marry him, she would have had no problem just ''saying'' "No, we're not engaged." The fact that Elizabeth took the time to snark Lady Catherine into submission over how she would, in theory, have every right to marry Mr Darcy if she wanted, is what gives Darcy the courage to try proposing to her again.

* The part in the book (and the movies) when Mrs. Bennet asks Mr. Bennet to force Elizabeth to marry Mr Collins, only to have him turn around with this line:
--> "An unhappy alternative is before you, Elizabeth. From this day you must be a stranger to one of your parents. --Your mother will never see you again if you do not marry Mr. Collins, and I will never see you again if you ''do''."
* When Elizabeth relates Mr. Wickham's tale of woe to Jane, Jane will not believe that Mr. Bingley's dear friend Mr. Darcy would be as cruel as described, and attributes the whole thing to a misunderstanding between the two men. Jane suggests that "interested people" have misrepresented Wickham and Darcy to each other, prompting a teasing reply from Elizabeth.

* Mr. Bennet, meanwhile, is not taken in by Wickham's woes and simply quips "With such narratives to hand, who would read novels?" And after the whole mess with Lydia is settled, he declares that Wickham is going to be his favorite of the husbands just for the entertainment value.

* The scene at Netherfield where Mr. Darcy is trying to write a letter to his sister and his ClingyJealousGirl Caroline Bingley constantly interrupts him to compliment his handwriting, the evenness of his lines, observe how fast he writes, or add her own message to his sister... while remaining completely oblivious to her target's determination to ignore her as best as he can!

* There's also the scene where Mr. Collins proposes and accepts Elizabeth's answers without her responding. She tries to turn him down gently, but he's not worried. He's heard that some women turn down proposals they plan on accepting. Sometimes even three times. It takes quite a while for her to convince him she's not going to marry him.

* The book's best piece of [[LemonyNarrator Lemony Narration]] comes when Elizabeth runs into her least favorite person, Mr. Darcy, during her walk through Rosings Park: "She felt all the perverseness of the mischance that should bring him where no one else was brought; and to prevent its ever happening again, took care to inform him at first, that it was a favourite haunt of hers. How it could occur a second time, therefore, was very odd!"
* Mr. Darcy's first proposal, in its way, is hilarious. The fact that he went in there, laid down a laundry list of highly insulting reasons why proposing to Elizabeth would be a terrible mistake and a disgrace, and then still fully expects that she's going to say yes! Not only that, he accuses ''her'' [[HypocriticalHumor of being uncivil]] when she is consequently quite chilly in declining. (He, of course, is just being ''honest''.)

* After obtaining Mr. Bennet's consent for the marriage, Elizabeth informs him that it was Darcy and not Mr. Gardiner who saved Lydia. In his typical flippant fashion he is delighted with this news:

* Lydia and Wickham's imposition on the rest of their family. First, she has the brass nerve to ask Elizabeth (the new Mrs. Darcy) for money. Though of course Mr. Wickham could never call on Pemberly, they ''did'' stay often at Netherfield whenever they had to find new lodgings (which was often) and so outstayed their welcome that Bingley would actually talk of, maybe, giving them a hint to leave.

-->'''Lady Catherine:''' I was told, that not only your sister was on the point of being most advantageously married, but that you, that Miss Elizabeth Bennet, would, in all likelihood, be soon afterwards united to my nephew, my own nephew, Mr. Darcy. Though I ''know'' it must be a scandalous falsehood; though I would not injure him so much as to suppose the truth of it possible, I instantly resolved on setting off for this place, that I might make my sentiments known to you.\\

'''Elizabeth:''' These are heavy misfortunes. But the wife of Mr. Darcy must have such extraordinary sources of happiness necessarily attached to her situation, that she could, upon the whole, have no cause to repine.

** The best part? Lady Catherine went right to Darcy and told him ''everything Elizabeth said.'' And Darcy is ''overjoyed''. It "taught me to hope," he says, because if Elizabeth didn't want to marry him, she would have had no problem just ''saying'' "No, we're not engaged." The fact that Elizabeth took the time to snark Lady Catherine into submission over how she would, in theory, have every right to marry Mr. Darcy if she wanted, is what gives Darcy the courage to try proposing to her again.
* When Mr. Collins first writes to Mr. Bennet, he admits that he was unsure about it for a long time-- Mr. Bennet and Mr. Collins' father had quarreled in the past, and while Mr. Collins was sorry about that, he was afraid that it might be disloyal of him to extend an olive-branch to someone it had always "pleased [his father] to be at odds with."

* Mr. Bennett casually suggesting to his wife that they should have drowned some of their daughters at birth. This is what happens when you hire Aldous Huxley to adapt a book.

* Charlotte details her married life to Elizabeth. She encourages Mr. Collins to be in his garden; the fresh air is so healthy. She encourages him to be in his library as reading is good for the mind. She encourages him to call upon Lady Catherine... so it turns out that they hardly spend more than a few minutes of the day together at all. She can bear the solitude quite well.
* There's a teeth-grindingly awkward moment just before Mr. Bingley proposes to Jane where Bingley, Jane, Mrs. Bennet and the other three remaining Bennet sisters are all seated in the drawing room in uncomfortable silence. Mrs. Bennet, seeking to give the young lovers some privacy, attempts to 'subtly' hint to her daughters that they should find an excuse to leave without saying anything, and ends up winking and twitching manically. And unfortunately, Kitty Bennet is a little too dense to get the intended message:

* Early on Lydia and Kitty are arguing over how many guests Mr. Bingley will be bringing to the Netherfield ball:

* After the Meryton Assembly, Mr. Bennet is forced to endure Mrs. Bennet's long and detailed description of the event, especially her blow-by-blow account of Bingley's dancing, finally bursting out with "Would that he had sprained his ankle in the first dance!" Followed by her switching to the subject of clothes:
-->'''Mrs. Bennet:''' "The lace on Mrs. Hurst's gown..."
-->'''Mr. Bennet:''' (pointing a poker at her) "No lace! ''No'' lace! I forbid it!"

* When Elizabeth meets Bingley in Darbyshire, Bingley not-so-subtly asks whether ''all'' her sisters are at home. Elizabeth answers that all but one are. Bingley clearly has a very brief OhCrap moment (while [[PerpetualSmiler continuing to smile broadly]]) before Elizabeth clarifies that her youngest sister has gone to Brighton, whereupon his smile grows even broader.

-->'''Kitty:''' "Twelve ladies and seven gentlemen!"
-->'''Lydia:''' "Nay, it was six ladies and five gentlemen."

* Elizabeth talks of Bingley's attraction to Jane by describing how he ignored everyone else, culminating in this great line:
-->'''Elizabeth:''' "Is not general incivility the very essence of love?"

-->'''Elizabeth:''' (aside to Jane) "Too many ladies."

-->'''Kitty:''' What is it, mama? Why do you keep winking at me? What am I to do?

** The best part? Lady Catherine went right to Darcy and told him ''everything Elizabeth said.'' And Darcy is ''overjoyed''. It "taught [me] to hope," he says, because if Elizabeth didn't want to marry him, she would have had no problem just ''saying'' "No, we're not engaged." The fact that Elizabeth took the time to snark Lady Catherine into submission over how she would, in theory, have every right to marry Mr. Darcy if she wanted, is what gives Darcy the courage to try proposing to her again.

* The infamous bit when Darcy dives into a lake and thus spawns the 'wet shirt' fetish. That itself isn't the funny part; the funny part is when he comes face to face with the (at the moment) unrequited and unexpected love of his life, basically half naked by the standards of the time and dripping wet. The awkwardness is ''hilarious;'' Elizabeth's even DistractedByTheSexy for a moment or two! [[Enjoy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hasKmDr1yrA]]

* The infamous bit when Darcy dives into a lake and thus spawns the 'wet shirt' fetish. That itself isn't the funny part; the funny part is when he comes face to face with the (at the moment) unrequited and unexpected love of his life, basically half naked by the standards of the time and dripping wet. The awkwardness is ''hilarious;'' Elizabeth's even DistractedByTheSexy for a moment or two! Enjoy! -> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hasKmDr1yrA

* Charlotte details her married life to Elizabeth. She encourages Mr. Collins to be in his garden; the fresh air is so healthy. She encourages him to be in his library as reading is good for the mind. She encourages him to call upon Lady Catherine... so it turns out that they hardly spend more than a few minutes of the day together at all. She can bear the solitude quite well.

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--> '''Lady Catherine:''' I was told, that not only your sister was on the point of being most advantageously married, but that you, that Miss Elizabeth Bennet, would, in all likelihood, be soon afterwards united to my nephew, my own nephew, Mr. Darcy. Though I ''know'' it must be a scandalous falsehood; though I would not injure him so much as to suppose the truth of it possible, I instantly resolved on setting off for this place, that I might make my sentiments known to you.\\

'''Lady Catherine:''' Has he, has my nephew, made you an offer of marriage?\\

** -->'''Lady Catherine:''' Do not expect to be noticed by his family or friends, if you wilfully act against the inclinations of all. You will be censured, slighted, and despised, by every one connected with him. Your alliance will be a disgrace; your name will never even be mentioned by any of us.\\

** -->'''Lady Catherine:''' You are to understand, Miss Bennet, that I came here with the determined resolution of carrying my purpose; nor will I be dissuaded from it. I have not been used to submit to any person's whims. I have not been in the habit of brooking disappointment.\\

--> ** '''Lady Catherine:''' I was told, that not only your sister was on the point of being most advantageously married, but that you, that Miss Elizabeth Bennet, would, in all likelihood, be soon afterwards united to my nephew, my own nephew, Mr. Darcy. Though I ''know'' it must be a scandalous falsehood; though I would not injure him so much as to suppose the truth of it possible, I instantly resolved on setting off for this place, that I might make my sentiments known to you.\\

** -->'''Lady Catherine:''' Has he, has my nephew, made you an offer of marriage?\\

** -->'''Lady Catherine:''' I was told, that not only your sister was on the point of being most advantageously married, but that you, that Miss Elizabeth Bennet, would, in all likelihood, be soon afterwards united to my nephew, my own nephew, Mr. Darcy. Though I ''know'' it must be a scandalous falsehood; though I would not injure him so much as to suppose the truth of it possible, I instantly resolved on setting off for this place, that I might make my sentiments known to you.\\