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* This gem introducing the examples of bad sex scenes, jokes and postmodernism for part 6 of the book: "Any of the following crimes against fiction can prevent the publication of your novel. Committing several will prevent the publication of novels by anyone whose name is similar to yours, just in case."
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Changed line(s) 21 (click to see context) from:
* "Dear Penthouse Letters" shows just how needed foreplay is for erotica by going from describing Cinderella's Disneyesque bedroom to suddenly having Prince Charming naked and saying ''"Suck me"''.
to:
* "Dear Penthouse Letters" shows just how needed foreplay is for erotica by going from describing Cinderella's Disneyesque bedroom to suddenly having Prince Charming naked and saying ''"Suck me"''.me"''.
* "Don't Mind Us" features Alan and Jane arguing about the former's incestuous relationship with his nearly underage cousin, being a Neo-Nazi and other such things during a meeting with the Mayor about Carb-Free Detroit.
* "Don't Mind Us" features Alan and Jane arguing about the former's incestuous relationship with his nearly underage cousin, being a Neo-Nazi and other such things during a meeting with the Mayor about Carb-Free Detroit.
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Changed line(s) 5 (click to see context) from:
** The example for the ''folie adieu''. Going from [[Literature/BridgetJones a steamy romance]] to [[Creator/HPLovecraft horror]] in one paragraph isn't romantic or scary, it's hilarious.
to:
** The example for the ''folie adieu''. Going from [[Literature/BridgetJones a steamy light-hearted romance]] to [[Creator/HPLovecraft horror]] in one paragraph isn't romantic sexy or scary, it's hilarious.
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Changed line(s) 20 (click to see context) from:
* "Writers who try to write from the point of view of a character who is [[TVGenius smarter]] than they are should consider asking that character if this is a good idea before proceeding."
to:
* "Writers who try to write from the point of view of a character who is [[TVGenius smarter]] than they are should consider asking that character if this is a good idea before proceeding.""
* "Dear Penthouse Letters" shows just how needed foreplay is for erotica by going from describing Cinderella's Disneyesque bedroom to suddenly having Prince Charming naked and saying ''"Suck me"''.
* "Dear Penthouse Letters" shows just how needed foreplay is for erotica by going from describing Cinderella's Disneyesque bedroom to suddenly having Prince Charming naked and saying ''"Suck me"''.
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Changed line(s) 1 (click to see context) from:
* The whole book is highly quotable, giving us such lines as "Giving a reader a sex scene that is only half right is like giving her half of a kitten. It is not half as cute as a whole kitten; it is a bloody, godawful mess."
to:
* The whole book is highly quotable, giving us such lines as "Giving a reader [[FetishRetardant a sex scene that is only half right right]] is like giving her half of a kitten. It is not half as cute as a whole kitten; it is a bloody, godawful mess."
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Changed line(s) 5 (click to see context) from:
** The example for the ''folie adieu''. Going from [[Literature/BridgetJonesDiary a steamy romance]] to [[Creator/HPLovecraft horror]] in one paragraph isn't romantic or scary, it's hilarious.
to:
** The example for the ''folie adieu''. Going from [[Literature/BridgetJonesDiary [[Literature/BridgetJones a steamy romance]] to [[Creator/HPLovecraft horror]] in one paragraph isn't romantic or scary, it's hilarious.
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Changed line(s) 19 (click to see context) from:
3. All of the typos
to:
3. All of the typostypos
* "Writers who try to write from the point of view of a character who is [[TVGenius smarter]] than they are should consider asking that character if this is a good idea before proceeding."
* "Writers who try to write from the point of view of a character who is [[TVGenius smarter]] than they are should consider asking that character if this is a good idea before proceeding."
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None
Changed line(s) 5 (click to see context) from:
** The example for the ''folie adieu''. Going from a [[Literature/BridgetJonesDiary]] steamy romance to [[Creator/HPLovecraft]] horror in one paragraph isn't romantic of scary, it's hilarious.
to:
** The example for the ''folie adieu''. Going from [[Literature/BridgetJonesDiary a [[Literature/BridgetJonesDiary]] steamy romance romance]] to [[Creator/HPLovecraft]] horror [[Creator/HPLovecraft horror]] in one paragraph isn't romantic of or scary, it's hilarious.
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Added DiffLines:
** The example for the ''folie adieu''. Going from a [[Literature/BridgetJonesDiary]] steamy romance to [[Creator/HPLovecraft]] horror in one paragraph isn't romantic of scary, it's hilarious.
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Changed line(s) 3 (click to see context) from:
* "This particular blunder is known as ''{{deus ex machina}};', which is French for 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"
to:
* "This particular blunder is known as ''{{deus ex machina}};', machina}}'', which is French for 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"
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Changed line(s) 3,5 (click to see context) from:
* "This particular blunder is known as '{{deus ex machina}}', which is French for 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of 'deus ex machina', known as the 'folie adieu', which is French for 'Are you FUCKING kidding me?'"
* Ask yourself, "do I know this word?" If the answer is no, [[ShapedLikeItself then you probably don't know it.]]
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of 'deus ex machina', known as the 'folie adieu', which is French for 'Are you FUCKING kidding me?'"
* Ask yourself, "do I know this word?" If the answer is no, [[ShapedLikeItself then you probably don't know it.]]
to:
* "This particular blunder is known as '{{deus ''{{deus ex machina}}', machina}};', which is French for 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of'deus ''deus ex machina', machina'', known as the 'folie adieu', ''folie adieu'', which is French for 'Are you FUCKING ''FUCKING'' kidding me?'"
* The authors certainly have a way of getting their point across. After a lengthy explanation of why something is a bad idea, they'll often finish off with a creative way of saying, "Just in case all that didn't convince you — the bottom line is, no editor is going to accept this."
** "If John somehow turns into a different man and we do not witness that transformation, the editor considering your novel will somehow turn into an editor considering a different novel."
** "The editor, though, does not have time to become desensitized between thinking 'Oh, this is one of those second-person things' and chuckling to himself as he thinks 'You are now rejecting this novel.'"
** "While we understand that you are looking forward to the moment when an editor calls to ask what your novel means, and is so taken with your brilliance that he offers you a seven-book contract on the spot—we checked, and this is never going to happen."
** "Whether you are expressing a private conviction or just being shocking, you will never make it to the shelves. An editor might sit up and take notice, but only because he knows that while it only takes a minute to reject your novel, he will be dining out on the story of how repellent you are for years to come."
* '''A Test: Do I Know This Word?''' Askyourself, "do yourself: "Do I know this word?" If the answer is no, [[ShapedLikeItself then you probably don't do not know it.]]it]].
* On the subject of proofreading:
-->Some manuscripts end up looking like the label on a bottle of Dr. Bronner’s. This doesn’t just happen to the manuscripts of writers with abysmal spelling and punctuation skills; it is often because an author hasn’t bothered to correct all the typos.\\
You have to correct all the typos.\\
'''Surprise Quiz'''\\
How many of the typos do you have to correct?\\
1. None of the typos\\
2. Some of the typos\\
3. All of the typos
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of
* The authors certainly have a way of getting their point across. After a lengthy explanation of why something is a bad idea, they'll often finish off with a creative way of saying, "Just in case all that didn't convince you — the bottom line is, no editor is going to accept this."
** "If John somehow turns into a different man and we do not witness that transformation, the editor considering your novel will somehow turn into an editor considering a different novel."
** "The editor, though, does not have time to become desensitized between thinking 'Oh, this is one of those second-person things' and chuckling to himself as he thinks 'You are now rejecting this novel.'"
** "While we understand that you are looking forward to the moment when an editor calls to ask what your novel means, and is so taken with your brilliance that he offers you a seven-book contract on the spot—we checked, and this is never going to happen."
** "Whether you are expressing a private conviction or just being shocking, you will never make it to the shelves. An editor might sit up and take notice, but only because he knows that while it only takes a minute to reject your novel, he will be dining out on the story of how repellent you are for years to come."
* '''A Test: Do I Know This Word?''' Ask
* On the subject of proofreading:
-->Some manuscripts end up looking like the label on a bottle of Dr. Bronner’s. This doesn’t just happen to the manuscripts of writers with abysmal spelling and punctuation skills; it is often because an author hasn’t bothered to correct all the typos.\\
You have to correct all the typos.\\
'''Surprise Quiz'''\\
How many of the typos do you have to correct?\\
1. None of the typos\\
2. Some of the typos\\
3. All of the typos
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Changed line(s) 4 (click to see context) from:
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of 'deus ex machina', known as the 'folie adieu', which is French for 'Are you FUCKING kidding me?'"
to:
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of 'deus ex machina', known as the 'folie adieu', which is French for 'Are you FUCKING kidding me?'"me?'"
* Ask yourself, "do I know this word?" If the answer is no, [[ShapedLikeItself then you probably don't know it.]]
* Ask yourself, "do I know this word?" If the answer is no, [[ShapedLikeItself then you probably don't know it.]]
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Changed line(s) 2 (click to see context) from:
* "By 2005, 'World Wide Web' was starting to sound like something [[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Mr. Burns would say to Smithers.]]"
to:
* "By 2005, 'World Wide Web' was starting to sound like something [[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Mr. Burns would say to Smithers.]]"]]"
* "This particular blunder is known as '{{deus ex machina}}', which is French for 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of 'deus ex machina', known as the 'folie adieu', which is French for 'Are you FUCKING kidding me?'"
* "This particular blunder is known as '{{deus ex machina}}', which is French for 'Are you fucking kidding me?'"
** Later: "This type of ending is a special instance of 'deus ex machina', known as the 'folie adieu', which is French for 'Are you FUCKING kidding me?'"
Is there an issue? Send a MessageReason:
None
Changed line(s) 1 (click to see context) from:
* The whole book is highly quotable, giving us such lines as "Giving a reader a sex scene that is only half right is like giving her half of a kitten. It is not half as cute as a whole kitten; it is a bloody, godawful mess."
to:
* The whole book is highly quotable, giving us such lines as "Giving a reader a sex scene that is only half right is like giving her half of a kitten. It is not half as cute as a whole kitten; it is a bloody, godawful mess.""
*"By 2005, 'World Wide Web' was starting to sound like something [[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Mr. Burns would say to Smithers.]]"
*"By 2005, 'World Wide Web' was starting to sound like something [[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons Mr. Burns would say to Smithers.]]"
