History Funny / Cheers

28th Jul '17 11:30:26 AM Gravidef
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* Frasier's adaptation of ''Literature/ATaleOfTwoCities'' to the bar. He reads off the famous opening lines, and everyone gradually loses interest...until he throws in an interesting twist. "And there was...a BLOODTHIRSTY CLOWN! [[Literature//{IT} Who lured little children down into the sewers and SWALLOWED THEM WHOLE!]]"

to:

* Frasier's adaptation of ''Literature/ATaleOfTwoCities'' to the bar. He reads off the famous opening lines, and everyone gradually loses interest...until he throws in an interesting twist. twist that comes from Stephen King's ''Literature/{{IT}}.'' "And there was...a BLOODTHIRSTY CLOWN! [[Literature//{IT} Who lured little children down into the sewers and SWALLOWED THEM WHOLE!]]"WHOLE!"
28th Jul '17 11:23:08 AM Gravidef
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** Everybody's locked out of the bar, and it's cold. Norm comes to the rescue- he's got his own set of keys.

to:

** Everybody's locked out of the bar, and it's cold. Norm comes to the rescue- he's rescue--he's got his own set of keys.keys.
** Diane becomes frustrated when no one cares when she enters the bar, comparing the lukewarm response to the boisterous "NORM!" Norm always gets. She asks if she can have a greeting like that for once; Sam agrees; she leaves and comes back in; and everyone yells..."NORM!"
** Norm comes to Cheers early and tells Sam he's decided to have a productive, active day. Sam lists off several outdoor activities to do, such as hiking or swimming, and Norm comes up with excuses to avoid them all. Finally, Sam guesses that Norm's chosen activity will be sitting in the bar all day and drinking beer; Norm "decides" this is the perfect suggestion and asks for a round.
** Carla opens up Cheers first thing in the morning and puts on "I Got the Sun in the Morning" from ''Annie Get Your Gun.'' She ''dances'' around the bar, climbing on the tables and riding the chairs down to arrange them, laughs, and generally has an amazing time. The second Sam and Rebecca arrive, though, she immediately adopts her cranky persona.
** Woody is excited to see that the book of crossword puzzles he's ordered has arrived. He says that the best thing about the book is that it lists all the answers in the back, which can help with tough clues. He, Norm, and Cliff then start filling in the first puzzle...by copying directly out of the answer section. "These things aren't so hard!"
** The guys show off various tricks they can do with their fingers and hands. Lilith overhears and shows off her own skill: putting her entire fist into her mouth. She's declared "queen" of such tricks, and starts writing a message, which the gang initially thinks is her going for bonus points...but she's actually writing "My fist is stuck. Call 911."



-->'''Frasier:''' Even the abstract concept of death is absurd. A pale bony figure coming up to tap you on the shoulder when your time is come.
-->'''Lilith:''' ''(taps him on the shoulder)'' Time to go, Frasier.

to:

-->'''Frasier:''' Even the abstract concept of death is absurd. A pale bony figure coming up to tap you on the shoulder when your time is come.
number's up.
-->'''Lilith:''' ''(taps ''(silently comes up behind him and taps him on the shoulder)'' Time Frasier, it's time to go, Frasier.go.



* Frasier's adaptation of ''Literature/ATaleOfTwoCities'' to the bar.

to:

* Frasier's adaptation of ''Literature/ATaleOfTwoCities'' to the bar. He reads off the famous opening lines, and everyone gradually loses interest...until he throws in an interesting twist. "And there was...a BLOODTHIRSTY CLOWN! [[Literature//{IT} Who lured little children down into the sewers and SWALLOWED THEM WHOLE!]]"



** Other items on the list include ''Literature/OliverTwist: The Wrath of Fagin'' and adding [[WesternAnimation/TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles "four pizza-loving turtles"]] to a classic.



* In the series finale, when Rebecca keeps neurotically changing her mind about whether Fraiser should call back her plumber boyfriend/fiancé. Fraiser finally gets fed up, throws open the door and theatrically shouts: "Run, Don! Run like the wind!"

to:

* In the series finale, when Rebecca keeps neurotically changing her mind about whether Fraiser Frasier should call back her plumber boyfriend/fiancé. Fraiser finally gets fed up, throws open the door and theatrically shouts: "Run, Don! Run like the wind!"



* In one episode, Lilith criticizes Frasier for constantly bringing baby Frederick to the bar. After Lilith rejects the idea that it's having any positive influence on a baby that can't talk yet...

to:

* In one episode, Lilith criticizes becomes frustrated when it seems that Frasier for constantly is a better parent then her...only to discover that Frasier's "intellectually stimulating" activity has been bringing baby Frederick to the bar. After Lilith rejects the idea Cheers. She takes him to task, claiming that it's having any positive influence on impossible for a baby that can't talk yet...to learn to speak in such an environment...



--> '''Lilith:''' ''(happy gasp)'' He said, ''[[SelfServingMemory "Mommy!"]]''

to:

--> '''Lilith:''' ''(happy gasp)'' He said, said ''[[SelfServingMemory "Mommy!"]]''


Added DiffLines:

** In the episode's tag, the gang discovers that Nanny G has left Frederick a birthday present: a singing doll modeled on herself. Trouble is, the doll's song ends with Nanny G giving Frasier her phone number--''repeatedly.'' First, an angry Lilith rips the doll's head off; then, when the guys start [[TooDumbToLive singing the number]], she chases after them and looks ready to kill.


Added DiffLines:

* Lilith goes into labor, and is told to visualize something to help with the pain. Her answer? "Tequila! Whiskey! Rum! SOMEONE KNOCKING ME UNCONSCIOUS WITH A MALLET!"
19th Jun '17 7:02:36 PM mlsmithca
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--> '''Sam:''' Say, that uh...that dip looks good.
---> ''(Frasier looks up; he and Lilith share an awkward Look)''
--> '''Frasier:''' ''(Swallows)'' ...Dip?
---> ''(Awkward pause)''
--> '''Sam:''' ...Yeah, the, uh...the dip--could you, uh...pass it, please?
--> '''Frasier:''' ''(Gathers himself; chuckles)'' Yes, of course--be my guest. Here, now....
--> '''Sam:''' ''(Taking bowl of dip)'' Oh, thank you. ''(He and samples with chip)'' Oh!--Oh, yeah, that ''is'' great dip, huh--yeah, try it!
---> ''(Lilith and Frasier share a smirk)''
--> '''Diane:''' Mmm!--''Delicious'', Lilith! Frasier? Have you tried some of Lilith's dip?
---> ''(Frasier GRINS, looking off; Diane waits)''
--> '''Frasier:''' Yes, I--I ''have'', yes....
---> ''(Lilith straightens up, smiling; Diane looks at them in smiling bewilderment)''
--> '''Diane:''' ...Well, then I don't have to tell ''you'' how good it is!
--> '''Frasier:''' ''(Chuckles)'' It's ''quite'' good, yes....
---> ''(Lilith GRINS)''
--> '''Sam:''' Well, I-I don't mean to ''hog'' it, here, uh--you guys look hungry! Help yourselves!
---> ''(Frasier and Lilith share a Look; they stand up, walk to Sam and Diane--take their chips in sync, dip...and pause to share another Look, which they hold as they taste together. Sam and Diane look up at them, wondering what the heck is going on.)''
--> '''Lilith:''' ''(Coyly)'' So, Frasier...was it good for you, too?
---> ''({{Beat}}--they lunge into a BigDamnKiss)''
--> '''Sam:''' ''({{Beat}}; turns to Diane)'' ...What the hell's in this ''dip''?
---> ''(Diane shrugs)''

to:

--> '''Sam:''' --->'''Sam:''' Say, that uh...that dip looks good.
--->
good.\\
''(Frasier looks up; he and Lilith share an awkward Look)''
-->
Look)''\\
'''Frasier:''' ''(Swallows)'' ...Dip?
--->
Dip?\\
''(Awkward pause)''
-->
pause)''\\
'''Sam:''' ...Yeah, the, uh...the dip--could you, uh...pass it, please?
-->
please?\\
'''Frasier:''' ''(Gathers himself; chuckles)'' Yes, of course--be my guest. Here, now....
-->
now....\\
'''Sam:''' ''(Taking bowl of dip)'' Oh, thank you. ''(He and samples with chip)'' Oh!--Oh, yeah, that ''is'' great dip, huh--yeah, try it!
--->
it!\\
''(Lilith and Frasier share a smirk)''
-->
smirk)''\\
'''Diane:''' Mmm!--''Delicious'', Lilith! Frasier? Have you tried some of Lilith's dip?
--->
dip?\\
''(Frasier GRINS, looking off; Diane waits)''
-->
waits)''\\
'''Frasier:''' Yes, I--I ''have'', yes....
--->
yes....\\
''(Lilith straightens up, smiling; Diane looks at them in smiling bewilderment)''
-->
bewilderment)''\\
'''Diane:''' ...Well, then I don't have to tell ''you'' how good it is!
-->
is!\\
'''Frasier:''' ''(Chuckles)'' It's ''quite'' good, yes....
--->
yes....\\
''(Lilith GRINS)''
-->
GRINS)''\\
'''Sam:''' Well, I-I don't mean to ''hog'' it, here, uh--you guys look hungry! Help yourselves!
--->
yourselves!\\
''(Frasier and Lilith share a Look; they stand up, walk to Sam and Diane--take their chips in sync, dip...and pause to share another Look, which they hold as they taste together. Sam and Diane look up at them, wondering what the heck is going on.)''
-->
)''\\
'''Lilith:''' ''(Coyly)'' So, Frasier...was it good for you, too?
--->
too?\\
''({{Beat}}--they lunge into a BigDamnKiss)''
-->
BigDamnKiss)''\\
'''Sam:''' ''({{Beat}}; turns to Diane)'' ...What the hell's in this ''dip''?
--->
''dip''?\\
''(Diane shrugs)''



'''Coach''': [''to everyone in the bar''] OK, everybody in favor of Cliff calling, raise your hand. [''everyone in the bar raises his/her hand''] It's [[{{Malaproper}} anonymous]].

to:

'''Coach''': [''to everyone in the bar''] OK, everybody in favor of Cliff calling, raise your hand. [''everyone in the bar raises his/her hand''] It's [[{{Malaproper}} anonymous]].anonymous]].
* Frasier drops his professionalism during one afternoon in Cheers:
-->'''Woody:''' Hey, how's it going, Dr. Crane?\\
'''Frasier:''' Oh, the usual. The crying, the tantrums, the bedwetting.\\
'''Woody:''' Yeah, that's fatherhood.\\
'''Frasier:''' ''[sighs]'' No, that's my therapy group. Whatta buncha losers.
----
16th May '17 9:58:20 AM ClatoLawa
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'''Coach:''' ''[Into the phone]'' Speaking.

to:

'''Coach:''' ''[Into the phone]'' Speaking.Speaking.
* After Norm gets in trouble with the law for filling in for Cliff on his mail route and Cliff is hesitant to come clean about it:
-->'''Cliff''': All right, look, I'll call and see what the penalty is, but it's got to be anonymous.\\
'''Coach''': [''to everyone in the bar''] OK, everybody in favor of Cliff calling, raise your hand. [''everyone in the bar raises his/her hand''] It's [[{{Malaproper}} anonymous]].
17th Mar '17 5:52:34 AM DoctorNemesis
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* A few gems came from the old barfly Al, whose first appearance had him insisting that the "biggest bigwig of them all" was [[Music/FrankSinatra Sinatra]]. And in the very first "Bar Wars", Sam and Carla head to Gary's Old Towne Tavern to apologize, only to find Al there. Carla questions why he isn't there, and he exclaims "Holy mackerel, this isn't Cheers?!"

to:

* A few gems came from the old barfly Al, whose first appearance had him insisting that the "biggest bigwig of them all" was [[Music/FrankSinatra Sinatra]]. And in the very first "Bar Wars", Sam and Carla head to Gary's Old Towne Tavern to apologize, only to find Al there. Carla questions why he isn't there, and he exclaims "Holy mackerel, this isn't Cheers?!"Cheers?!"
* This little exchange from the first episode:
-->'''Coach:''' ''[Answering the phone]'' Is there an Ernie Pantuso here?\\
'''Sam:''' That's you, Coach.\\
'''Coach:''' ''[Into the phone]'' Speaking.
6th Mar '17 11:32:22 AM huberd
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* A young pitcher for the Red Sox in the midst of a slump sought out advice from Coach and Sam on how to overcome it. Diane tells Sam to suggest meditation, Coach suggests having an active sex life. While the pitcher shies away, Diane overhears and encourages him to do it(thinking he is talking about meditation), and [[OneDialogueTwoConversations offers to do it with him]]. The icing on the cake is Sam laughing his ass off at watching Diane dig herself deeper and deeper.

to:

* A young pitcher for the Red Sox in the midst of a slump sought out advice from Coach and Sam on how to overcome it. Diane tells Sam to suggest meditation, Coach suggests having an active sex life. While the pitcher shies away, Diane overhears and encourages him to do it(thinking it (thinking he is talking about meditation), and [[OneDialogueTwoConversations offers to do it with him]]. The icing on the cake is Sam laughing his ass off at watching Diane dig herself deeper and deeper.
3rd Feb '17 4:06:42 PM themisterfree
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-->'''Sam:''' ''(combination matter-of-factly and DeadpanSnarker)'' You want me to propose to you - I propose to you. You say 'no', I say 'fine, I never want to see you again'. You drive me nuts telling me you want me to propose to again, I do, you turn me down. [[EscalatingPunchline Next thing I know, I'm in a court of law where I've got to propose to you or I'll go to jail.]] [[SarcasmMode It's the classic American love story.]]

to:

-->'''Sam:''' ''(combination matter-of-factly and DeadpanSnarker)'' You want me to propose to you - I propose to you. You say 'no', I say 'fine, I never want to see you again'. You drive me nuts telling me you want me to propose to again, I do, you turn me down. [[EscalatingPunchline Next thing I know, I'm in a court of law where I've got to propose to you or I'll go to jail.]] [[SarcasmMode It's the classic American love story.]]]]
* A few gems came from the old barfly Al, whose first appearance had him insisting that the "biggest bigwig of them all" was [[Music/FrankSinatra Sinatra]]. And in the very first "Bar Wars", Sam and Carla head to Gary's Old Towne Tavern to apologize, only to find Al there. Carla questions why he isn't there, and he exclaims "Holy mackerel, this isn't Cheers?!"
3rd Feb '17 4:01:01 PM themisterfree
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Added DiffLines:

** Everybody's locked out of the bar, and it's cold. Norm comes to the rescue- he's got his own set of keys.
4th Jan '17 2:43:24 AM SeptimusHeap
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* How about Frasier and Lilith's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAb1W6FJ2qo&feature=related debate]]" back in season 5? On their end, FreudWasRight, DoubleEntendre, and GettingCrapPastTheRadar. On Sam and Diane's end, HandsplayInTheater and StrangelyArousing. All UpToEleven!

to:

* How about Frasier and Lilith's "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAb1W6FJ2qo&feature=related debate]]" back in season 5? On their end, FreudWasRight, DoubleEntendre, and GettingCrapPastTheRadar. On Sam and Diane's end, HandsplayInTheater and StrangelyArousing. All UpToEleven!
20th Dec '16 9:33:41 AM AnotherGuy
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-->'''Sam:''' ''(combination matter-of-factly and DeadpanSnarker)'' You want me to propose to you - I propose to you. You say 'no', I say 'fine, I never want to see you again'. You drive me nuts telling me you want me to propose to again, I do, you turn me down. [[FawltyTowersPlot Next thing I know, I'm in a court of law where I've got to propose to you or I'll go to jail.]] [[SarcasmMode It's the classic American love story.]]

to:

-->'''Sam:''' ''(combination matter-of-factly and DeadpanSnarker)'' You want me to propose to you - I propose to you. You say 'no', I say 'fine, I never want to see you again'. You drive me nuts telling me you want me to propose to again, I do, you turn me down. [[FawltyTowersPlot [[EscalatingPunchline Next thing I know, I'm in a court of law where I've got to propose to you or I'll go to jail.]] [[SarcasmMode It's the classic American love story.]]
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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.Cheers