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* Lord Emsworth's arrival at his club goes unnoticed by the other members.
--> To attract attention in the dining-room of the Senior Conservative Club between the hours of one and two-thirty, you have to be a mutton chop--not an earl.
--> To attract attention in the dining-room of the Senior Conservative Club between the hours of one and two-thirty, you have to be a mutton chop--not an earl.
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* "[Freddie] had very little mind, but what he had was suffering."
* The description of all the ways Freddie gets on his father's nerves.
--> He had been expelled from Eton for breaking out at night and roaming the streets of Windsor in a false mustache. He had been sent down from Oxford for pouring ink from a second-story window on the junior dean of his college. He had spent two years at an expensive London crammer's and failed to pass into the army. He had also accumulated an almost record series of racing debts, besides as shady a gang of friends--for the most part vaguely connected with the turf--as any young man of his age ever contrived to collect.
* The description of all the ways Freddie gets on his father's nerves.
--> He had been expelled from Eton for breaking out at night and roaming the streets of Windsor in a false mustache. He had been sent down from Oxford for pouring ink from a second-story window on the junior dean of his college. He had spent two years at an expensive London crammer's and failed to pass into the army. He had also accumulated an almost record series of racing debts, besides as shady a gang of friends--for the most part vaguely connected with the turf--as any young man of his age ever contrived to collect.
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The net result of these things was that, for perhaps half a minute, Ashe behaved absurdly. He goggled and he yammered. An alienist, had one been present, would have made up his mind about him without further investigation.
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The net result of these things was that, for perhaps half a minute, Ashe behaved absurdly. He goggled and he yammered. An alienist, A lunacy commissioner, had one been present, would have made up his mind about him without further investigation.
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*
--> '''Joan:''' Good gracious, Mr. Marson; here you are in the biggest city in the world, with chances for adventure simply shrieking to you on every side.
--> '''Ashe:''' I must be deaf. The only thing I have heard shrieking to me on every side has been Mrs. Bell--for the week's rent.
--> '''Joan:''' Good gracious, Mr. Marson; here you are in the biggest city in the world, with chances for adventure simply shrieking to you on every side.
--> '''Ashe:''' I must be deaf. The only thing I have heard shrieking to me on every side has been Mrs. Bell--for the week's rent.
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* An unexpected visitor drops in on Ashe.
--> Various circumstances contributed to the poorness of the figure Ashe cut in the opening moments of this interview. In the first place, he was expecting to see his landlady, whose height was about four feet six, and the sudden entry of somebody who was about five feet seven threw the universe temporarily out of focus. In the second place, in anticipation of Mrs. Bell's entry, he had twisted his face into a forbidding scowl, and it was no slight matter to change this on the spur of the moment into a pleasant smile. Finally, a man who has been sitting for half an hour in front of a sheet of paper bearing the words: "The Adventure of the Wand of Death," and trying to decide what a wand of death might be, has not his mind under proper control.\\
The net result of these things was that, for perhaps half a minute, Ashe behaved absurdly. He goggled and he yammered. An alienist, had one been present, would have made up his mind about him without further investigation.
--> Various circumstances contributed to the poorness of the figure Ashe cut in the opening moments of this interview. In the first place, he was expecting to see his landlady, whose height was about four feet six, and the sudden entry of somebody who was about five feet seven threw the universe temporarily out of focus. In the second place, in anticipation of Mrs. Bell's entry, he had twisted his face into a forbidding scowl, and it was no slight matter to change this on the spur of the moment into a pleasant smile. Finally, a man who has been sitting for half an hour in front of a sheet of paper bearing the words: "The Adventure of the Wand of Death," and trying to decide what a wand of death might be, has not his mind under proper control.\\
The net result of these things was that, for perhaps half a minute, Ashe behaved absurdly. He goggled and he yammered. An alienist, had one been present, would have made up his mind about him without further investigation.
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* Ashe looks at his writing "with the sullen repulsion of a vegetarian who finds a caterpillar in his salad".
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!!''Something Fresh''
* "In English country towns, if the public houses do not actually outnumber the inhabitants, they all do an excellent trade. It is only when they are two to one that hard times hit them and set the innkeepers to blaming the government."
* Ashe was christened in honour of "a wealthy uncle who subsequently double-crossed [Ashe's parents] by leaving his money to charities".
* Ashe is a fitness fanatic who decides to do exercises in public.
--> The first time he appeared in Arundell Street in his sweater and flannels he had barely whirled his Indian clubs once around his head before he had attracted [[LongList the following audience]]:\\
a) Two cabmen--one intoxicated; b) Four waiters from the Hotel Mathis; c) Six waiters from the Hotel Previtali; d) Six chambermaids from the Hotel Mathis; e) Five chambermaids from the Hotel Previtali; f) The proprietor of the Hotel Mathis; g) The proprietor of the Hotel Previtali; h) A street cleaner; i) Eleven nondescript loafers; j) Twenty-seven children; k) A cat.
!!Other stories
* "In English country towns, if the public houses do not actually outnumber the inhabitants, they all do an excellent trade. It is only when they are two to one that hard times hit them and set the innkeepers to blaming the government."
* Ashe was christened in honour of "a wealthy uncle who subsequently double-crossed [Ashe's parents] by leaving his money to charities".
* Ashe is a fitness fanatic who decides to do exercises in public.
--> The first time he appeared in Arundell Street in his sweater and flannels he had barely whirled his Indian clubs once around his head before he had attracted [[LongList the following audience]]:\\
a) Two cabmen--one intoxicated; b) Four waiters from the Hotel Mathis; c) Six waiters from the Hotel Previtali; d) Six chambermaids from the Hotel Mathis; e) Five chambermaids from the Hotel Previtali; f) The proprietor of the Hotel Mathis; g) The proprietor of the Hotel Previtali; h) A street cleaner; i) Eleven nondescript loafers; j) Twenty-seven children; k) A cat.
!!Other stories
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* A comment about pubs in ''Something Fresh'': "In English country towns, if the public houses do not actually outnumber the inhabitants, they all do an excellent trade. It is only when they are two to one that hard times hit them and set the innkeepers to blaming the government."
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"The practical note!" said Lady Julia, with indulgent approval. "How stimulating that is. Time is money, and all that. Quite. Well, cutting the preamble, I want a job for Ronnie."\\
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"The practical note!" said [[GrandeDame Lady Julia, Julia]], with indulgent approval. "How stimulating that is. Time is money, and all that. Quite. Well, cutting the preamble, I want a job for Ronnie."\\
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* In "The Crime Wave at Blandings", Lord Emsworth is called on to deliver a scolding to his grandson George for shooting his tutor Baxter with an airgun. In between Lord Emsworth's easily distracted nature, his own dislike of Baxter and his long-dormant childhood fondness for airguns, it does not end up being a particularly effective scolding.
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* The whole business with Baxter throwing flowerpots at Lord Emsworth.
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* The whole business with Baxter throwing flowerpots at Lord Emsworth.Emsworth.
----
----
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* The whole business with Baxter throwing flowerpots at Lord Emsworth.
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* "What is your business?" asked Lord Tilbury.\\
"The practical note!" said Lady Julia, with indulgent approval. "How stimulating that is. Time is money, and all that. Quite. Well, cutting the preamble, I want a job for Ronnie."\\
Lord Tilbury looked like a trapped wolf [[{{Metaphorgotten}} who had thought as much]].
"The practical note!" said Lady Julia, with indulgent approval. "How stimulating that is. Time is money, and all that. Quite. Well, cutting the preamble, I want a job for Ronnie."\\
Lord Tilbury looked like a trapped wolf [[{{Metaphorgotten}} who had thought as much]].
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* "[[{{Understatement}} It is never difficult]] to distinguish between [[ViolentGlaswegian a Scotsman with a grievance]] and a ray of sunshine."
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* "[[{{Understatement}} It "It is never difficult]] difficult to distinguish between [[ViolentGlaswegian a Scotsman with a grievance]] and a ray of sunshine."
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* "[[{{Understatement}} It is never difficult]] to distinguish between [[ViolentGlaswegian a Scotsman with a grievance]] and a ray of sunshine."
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* "[[{{Understatement}} It is never difficult]] to distinguish between [[ViolentGlaswegian a Scotsman with a grievance]] and a ray of sunshine."
* "It was a fine cow, as cows go, but, like so many cows, it lacked sustained dramatic interest ..."
* "It was a fine cow, as cows go, but, like so many cows, it lacked sustained dramatic interest ..."
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* "[[{{Understatement}} It is never difficult]] to distinguish between [[ViolentGlaswegian a Scotsman with a grievance]] and a ray of sunshine."
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from Funny.PGWodehouse
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* "PIG ''HOOO'''''EY'''!"
* A comment about pubs in ''Something Fresh'': "In English country towns, if the public houses do not actually outnumber the inhabitants, they all do an excellent trade. It is only when they are two to one that hard times hit them and set the innkeepers to blaming the government."
* A comment about pubs in ''Something Fresh'': "In English country towns, if the public houses do not actually outnumber the inhabitants, they all do an excellent trade. It is only when they are two to one that hard times hit them and set the innkeepers to blaming the government."
