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It's a fanfiction
Somehow, I decided to pick Twilight up and read it. Like many of the other reviewers, I am an avid reader. I love all sorts of books, from Sci-Fi to Fantasy to Mystery to etc etc etc. I even read some fanfictions, and I really enjoy the good ones. I've even written some fanfiction myself, but please don't go looking for it, it's total crap.

Twilight is not one of the fanfics I enjoy. And yes, it is a fanfiction. The main characters are flat, unlikeable Mary Sues. The plot is something out of a fifth-grade writing project, and perhaps worse than the drivel I've written. The background characters are fascinating, but Ms. Meyers refuses to focus on them, preferring to blather about "Eddykinz" and "Bellabear" and their "incorruptible pure love and purity". There is no character development, and even less reason for their relationship. I never once saw them do anything but act lustful. No talking about movies, comparing books, nothing. Heck, even my characters at least did a little stargazing! The only thing close to a "relationship" is Edward stalking Bella, and coercing her. Later, it's more "Bella screwing Edwards brains out", and paying no attention to their daughter.

And, on a side note, do females ever wear the pants in these relationships? All the female sparklepires are sterile. The one female werewolf that we meet is sterile, and cannot imprint on anyone. And this drivel is aimed at MY demographic! This is the first time I have ever burned an entire series of books, and I don't regret is at all. I had to read a lot of Michael Crichton to help me forget this traumatic experience.

In short, if you want to read a book, you would be better off looking up slash fanfiction or reading "The Jungle" by Upton Sinclair than even looking at this book series.
It would help if this review were divided into paragraphs as walls of text are hard to follow.

"The Jungle" by Upton Sinclair? Odd recommendation, but I suppose anything is better.

It's rare that you find a work that reads like it's own fan fiction but Twilight does it.
comment #14842 morninglight 14th Jun 12
Oy, if you think THIS is bad, try Fifty Shades of Grey. It's like...worse. A lot worse. And I didn't even get to the weird sex parts before I had to stop reading.
comment #14847 JobanGrayskull 14th Jun 12
So fifty shades is fan-fiction of fan-fiction. What plot is there, minus the BDSM? Eventually fanfic of fifty shades itself will be published.
comment #14848 morninglight 14th Jun 12
Hehehe... I have yet to catch on to these "paragraphs" you speak of. I recommended The Jungle because I DON'T like it, not because I do. A book that made me weep for humanity is STILL better than Twilight.
comment #14870 Shadowbane509 15th Jun 12
Um, it's not a fanfiction. You're giving fanfiction a bad name there. A fanfiction is a work based on the characters and/or plot of another work. Twilight, as far as I know, is not based on any other specific work. You seem use the term 'fanfiction' as synonymous with 'badly written' but the definition of fanfiction has nothing to do with quality. Some fanfiction is bad, some is good. There is definitely a lot of really bad fanfiction out there, but I'd say the majority is about mediocre(it varies from fandom to fandom though). But there's some really good fanfics out there too. There are some fanfics better than most published books I've read. Overall, comparing Twilight to fanfiction is an insult to fanfiction.(Sorry for the rant. I'm an avid fanfic writer and reader and it bothers me when people assume that all fanfiction is badly written mary sue fics written by 13 yr old girls) Twilight definitely resembles a bad fanfic, but it is not a fanfiction. 50 Shades of Grey, on the other hand....

Other than that, though, I quite agree with your sentiments. Twilight is awful. I would definitely prefer reading slash fanfiction(of course, I like reading slashfic anyways)
comment #15649 inmylife 3rd Aug 12
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