Prior to seeing The Dark Tower, my only exposure to the series was via my housemate, who would routinely say the phrase "thankee sai" to strangers in casual conversation, working as a kind of secret handshake for those who bothered to read the seven book series. If he were to watch The Dark Tower film, he'd be sorely disappointed. Not once in the entire hour and a half run time is that phrase uttered.
Asides from that, I can't comment on how close the film is meant to be to the books. What I can say is The Dark Tower shows some promise early on and squanders it over the rest of the run time. For a story, we have a boy who has visions of a secret World of gunslingers and Devilish masterminds. Pretty soon he finds himself targeted by Matthew Mc Conaughey, who is looking for children to feed into a machine that shoots fireballs at a big tower. The boy finds himself in the care of Idris Elba's legendary gunslinger, Roland.
That's as good a set up as any. A big problem though is that the movie has to rush to establish a lot of seemingly superfluous elements. For instance, our boy is randomly attacked by a floorboard monster. Within 10 seconds, he's somehow gotten away from the floor and the scene ends. I was left scratching my head as to what the brief, bizarre exchange was about. "Oh, it was to steal his satchel!" I said, seeing it was now missing from the boy's shoulder. Then in the next shot later the satchel's back around him. "Nope, just a continuity error, back to being mystified". Mc Conaughey talks about the boy escaping as proof of his excellent "shine", but that wasn't evident to us in the cheap seats at all. These references to The Shining are opaque, and whilst I understand there is a giant singular canon for Stephen King fiction, that means nothing to us unenlightened. Other bizarre quirks, which I assume are inherited from the book, are exhibited haphazardly. Mc Conaughey mentions people "resist his magicks", which might have worked if it was said sardonically by a larger-than-life villain, but Mc Conaughey plays "The Man in Black" understated and po faced, so it sounds really stupid.
Idris Elba's Roland is understated too. He and the boy don't really establish any kind of friendship over the course of the story, they just do things for each other. This lack of rapport or humanity causes the film to drag. It's rushing yet somehow feels sluggish and dull at the same time. The trailer pretends there's constant adventure and gun fighting, but there isn't any such excitement for two thirds of the film. Even when the action comes around, all I could think about is how weedy and quiet Rowland's six shooters sound. How can a movie get even that wrong?
The Dark Tower has a lot of good elements; a novel concept, a pedigree franchise, a collection of fine actors, but these ingredients are simply pulped together into an insipid, mealy porridge.
Slowest Gun in the West
Prior to seeing The Dark Tower, my only exposure to the series was via my housemate, who would routinely say the phrase "thankee sai" to strangers in casual conversation, working as a kind of secret handshake for those who bothered to read the seven book series. If he were to watch The Dark Tower film, he'd be sorely disappointed. Not once in the entire hour and a half run time is that phrase uttered.
Asides from that, I can't comment on how close the film is meant to be to the books. What I can say is The Dark Tower shows some promise early on and squanders it over the rest of the run time. For a story, we have a boy who has visions of a secret World of gunslingers and Devilish masterminds. Pretty soon he finds himself targeted by Matthew Mc Conaughey, who is looking for children to feed into a machine that shoots fireballs at a big tower. The boy finds himself in the care of Idris Elba's legendary gunslinger, Roland.
That's as good a set up as any. A big problem though is that the movie has to rush to establish a lot of seemingly superfluous elements. For instance, our boy is randomly attacked by a floorboard monster. Within 10 seconds, he's somehow gotten away from the floor and the scene ends. I was left scratching my head as to what the brief, bizarre exchange was about. "Oh, it was to steal his satchel!" I said, seeing it was now missing from the boy's shoulder. Then in the next shot later the satchel's back around him. "Nope, just a continuity error, back to being mystified". Mc Conaughey talks about the boy escaping as proof of his excellent "shine", but that wasn't evident to us in the cheap seats at all. These references to The Shining are opaque, and whilst I understand there is a giant singular canon for Stephen King fiction, that means nothing to us unenlightened. Other bizarre quirks, which I assume are inherited from the book, are exhibited haphazardly. Mc Conaughey mentions people "resist his magicks", which might have worked if it was said sardonically by a larger-than-life villain, but Mc Conaughey plays "The Man in Black" understated and po faced, so it sounds really stupid.
Idris Elba's Roland is understated too. He and the boy don't really establish any kind of friendship over the course of the story, they just do things for each other. This lack of rapport or humanity causes the film to drag. It's rushing yet somehow feels sluggish and dull at the same time. The trailer pretends there's constant adventure and gun fighting, but there isn't any such excitement for two thirds of the film. Even when the action comes around, all I could think about is how weedy and quiet Rowland's six shooters sound. How can a movie get even that wrong?
The Dark Tower has a lot of good elements; a novel concept, a pedigree franchise, a collection of fine actors, but these ingredients are simply pulped together into an insipid, mealy porridge.