Asexuals and Aromantics Unite!

Eh. I like the idea of eventually settling down with a wife and maybe having a singular child, but that just seems really far away in the future, and I don't really give a shit about being in a relationship now.

It's weird, I can't wait to be a middle-aged man with a stable job and an afternoon nap every Sunday.

I think due to how fucked up our world is, you got be getting any of those dreams. Things are going to get worse, I just don't know how much. Just don't feel bad about not being in a relationship. Be happy! You're free! And you don't have to deal with another person all the time!

I dunno, that seems kinda...cynical.

There's nothing wrong with romance if it makes you happy. I myself don't actually understand it at all, and I've never felt the emotions involved in it, but it seems to make people happy. So if that's what you want, that's fine.

But, if you're no longer interested in that kind of thing, and you find your friendships are all you need, then that's fine too.

Don't worry too much about it either way.

Hmmmm, my emotions keep fluctuating. I have no idea what I identify as. I just know it's not allosexual alloromantic.

Heheh. Fuck.

I guess I'll just make friends with the spiders on the ceiling while I'm waiting for this bullshit to work itself out.

edited 27th Oct '15 7:05:30 PM by trashconverters

Yeah I mean I wouldn't say it's shallow and awful 100% of the time because some people seem to enjoy it. Also I disagree that I never base my friendship on anything shallow (like say what books we like) or am selfish in it (sometimes I want my friends to pay attention to me or comfort me, I like their attention, I mean I reciprocate but still).

I never said friendship couldn't be based on shallow reasons. I only said it can be based on reasons with actual substance, unlike romance which is purely shallow.

I've turned anti-sexual and a lesser extent anti-romantic based on when my dad cheated on my mom (they're divorced now, thank gosh). I was already asexual, aromantic, and repulsed by the idea and concept of sex; but over time, it made me outright hate them. The fact that me and so many other of my family, friends, etc. where worth less than my dad's penis just infuriates me. Something so shallow and disgusting has more worth than other people. I also hate the way my dad treated me, my mom, and so many others. He's better now, but again, we're worth less than his girl"friend". The relationship he has with her seems so insincere and there's the fact he's not the dominant one or even equals (if I'm getting it right, in relationships like this, the people involved should be more or less equals and there should be no dominant person). He's intimidated by her and does more for her than the reverse (he does tons, she doesn't seem to reciprocate). Plus there's the fact he cheated on my mom when I was even younger (which didn't last like this one). Who's to say he hasn't cheated a million times over? What if he's cheated on his current girl"friend"? I'll laugh when their relationship finally fizzles out. My jackass dad and his jackass girl"friend" deserve it.

There's also the fact that media and so many people hype up sex and romance to be the "greatest things evar". I loathe having to hear about such stupid and shallow things every waking moment of my life. And the people doing the actions don't actually look as happy as they claim to be. And you hear about so many break ups, sexual abuse, etc. that hurt so many people, tuning people's statements about romance and sex being the "best things evar" against them.

So basically I'm deeply against romance and sex for hurting my life and so many other's lives and for being so fucking stupid, shallow, overhyped, overrated, etc. I'll be dammed if another person has to suffer due such shallow base urges.

I don;t think I even covered all of what makes me angry about it.

edited 27th Oct '15 9:19:40 PM by KingFeraligatr

........But if you've never felt romantic feelings yourself, how can you be so sure they're purely shallow?

They seem to mean something to at least some of the people who experience them. I'd say most of the people who experience them.

I try not to make any judgments on the value of romantic relationships. Having never experienced any romantic feelings, I don't find them important, but they seem to be important to other people. Different things mean different things to different people.

That said, I would appreciate it if media didn't constantly inundate us with "ROMANCE IS THE BEST THING EVAR AND IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES US HUMAN" bullshit. It caused me no end of grief in my high school years.

edited 28th Oct '15 3:46:07 AM by DeathsApprentice

I'm just going to call myself mostly-aro-except-not-but-definitely-ace.

Also please tell me I'm not the only one who noticed the thread name says "aromatic" rather than "aromantic".

edited 28th Oct '15 4:35:46 AM by trashconverters

........Well, we smell nice.

Cue the "Urban Dysentery" jokes from yours truly. Huehuehue.

It's a fact that aromantics are actually just sentient candles.

Makes sense. You ever tried to kiss a candle?

Well, no, considering the fact I'm mostly-aro ace and don't really want to kiss anything.

Well, yeah...but that's why we're candles...cos you don't wanna kiss one...Ba-dum TISH

I consider myself more of an essential oil, to be honest.

edited 28th Oct '15 5:32:40 AM by trashconverters

I do hate how much movies push that it's annoying, even kid's movies do it, even though kids tend not to experience romantic feelings yet.

Also I'm allergic to scented candles and most perfumes does that make me allergic to myself? I mean I assumed I was sneezing a lot due to the flu

I agree. I would like to see more media where people are completely content with being alone, and no one minds that.

Also, hey everyone. I'm also an asexual (ace?). Probably aromantic as well. If other people want to have relationships, then they're free to do so, I have yet to meet anyone who could make me happy in that way. So yeah, I believe Deaths Apprentice covered my thoughts on the matter pretty well.

About the typo in the thread tile, I can't fix it . Sorry. The Typo Master strikes again.

Oh yeah that would be great. I think the phenomenon has a super long name I can't spell too.

Would it be too tumblr-y if I called myself asexual greyromantic?

Also your typos are much appreciated, Gatr. We couldn't be a secret society of nice smelling non-romantic individuals without them.

Nah, I don't think greyromantic is a very tumblr-y label.

Well, that settles it. Greyro ace it is.

So, hey folks. I'm on the asexuality spectrum, but I'm not aromantic (and definitely not aromatic). My personal sex drive is negligible, but I do feel the desire for a companionship that goes deeper than friendship.

And yeah, I am pretty sick of the nearly inescapable inundation of romance in modern media. Nowadays, romances get shoehorned into just about everything, whether it suits the story or not. It's not that fictional romances can't be written well - they most definitely can - it's just that they almost never are. 90-95% of the time, they're just shallow and tacked-on subplots in which we are told to care about the two most attractive people in the show inevitably getting together.

What annoys me most of all, though, is when sex is presented as being somehow the ultimate defining factor in a relationship. Like writers think all they have to do to show that two characters are in love is show them having sex. Or, even worse, when they act like the fact that two characters haven't had sex means that they aren't actually in love, or that there's somehow something wrong with their relationship. As a non-aro ace, you can see why that really galls me.

Oh yeah. That "love can't happen without sex" business makes me want to go drink bleach.

Heh. Glad to hear I'm not the only one.