Should I join a religion

So I am an atheist, raised in an irreligious household where I was never told anything in particular about what to believe, beyond the generic "don't insult people who disagree with you about it." And to be honest, I probably am not going to go out and join some congregation any time soon, even though I'm posting this here, but I flirt with the idea from time to time. Anyway, let's see if you all want to advise me. If it makes a difference in how you advise me, I am such a centrist Republican that I'm surprised I'm not a Democrat, so I am unlikely to go for some fundamentalist sect unless they are really awesome like the Amish.

Contenders:

1. The Society of Friends

Pros: They don't require you to believe in a deity. I like the worship method. I am willing to support the big things they advocate (peace equality simplicity honesty). Tend not to be fuzzywuzzy. Absurdly high level of opportunity for lay participation in church governance.

Cons: There is a faction of fuzzywuzzies, even if they don't appear to dominate. Also while I can label myself a pacifist, it would sort of be pretend pacifism in my case. And when I went to the big Quaker church in Philadelphia, the woman handling the desk did acknowledge that the business meetings could drag on and on and on and on and on.

2. Unitarian Universalism

Pros: you can believe pretty much whatever you want, since the closest thing they have to required beliefs is a short group of statements intended to be incredibly vague. High level of opportunity for lay participation in church governance. The worship is usually generic mainstream Protestant in format (even though not in theology) which is something I'm fine with.

Cons: Lots and lots of fuzzywuzzies. And if I can believe anything I want, can't I believe it at home and send a check to Doctors without Borders instead of to a church? Maybe those vague statements in the "creed" are too vague.

3. Mainline Protestantism

Pros: I'm fine with the worship service style, and they aren't Fundamentalists. Depending on the exact denomination, I may think the worship is pretty cool. I can readily accept most or all of the social and ethical teachings.

Cons: I would have to at least pretend to believe in more supernatural stuff than I would be willing to.

4. Roman Catholicism

Pros: cool worship service. I can readily accept a large amount of the social and ethical teachings. If I have to accept supernatural teachings, they have some cool supernatural theology and methods of relating to the supernatural.

Cons: I'd have to pretend to believe in any of the dogma, and strongly disagree with certain parts of their social and ethical teachings, mostly to do with sex. (Interestingly, Margaret Sanger of Planned Parenthood is from where I live, and I could see the Roman Catholic church she attended as a youth if I turned around and a five story building weren't in the way.)

5. Evangelical Protestants

Pros: might have cool worship services. Might have social and ethical teachings I'd accept.

Cons: might not have cool worship services. Have to figure out whether they have good social/ethical teachings. Can I accept their requirements for believing in the supernatural, even if pretending?

6. Assorted other Christians

Pros: depends Cons: depends

7. Other religions

Pros: very high cool factor, or can be parlayed into a cool factor if I spin it to people the right way. Otherwise, depends. Sects of Islam, Shinto, Sikhism and Buddhism rate highly, depending on which flavour. Not going into further detail simply to avoid an excessively long post.

Cons: Depend on the specific religion and sect of said religion to a large extent. Islam and Judaism may lead to (different flavours of) bigotry aimed at me, for obvious but obviously stupid reasons, and certain others may lead to bigotry for usually even more stupid reasons (i.e. usually being confused with Islam and falling into that category of bigotry.) No further detail to avoid excessively long post.

9. Your suggestions

Pros: ? Cons: ?

I found the surface-level ideals of Zoroastrianism (good thoughts, good words, good deeds) to be quite inspiring.

Other than that, what are you trying to get out of it? Because reading through that post, I can't help but feel like you'd rather join a social club.

I feel the need to point out that the OP was made 8 years ago.