Is this too dark and gruesome for a succubi?

A villainess that I'm working with is a succubi, who of course, seduces men (or women. Disguised as a human, or undercover as a new employee at a news station, she seduces the taken man into infidelity before wiping their memory clean of anything that happened. However, they are then cursed, as when those exact men sleep with their wives/girlfriends, the curse is then placed on the women. During this, the women receive the memories and visions of their lovers' infidelity, discovering the truth and sending into complete rage, thus resulting in them murdering their lovers before either suicide or arrest. However, the results vary from person to person depending on the amount of feelings - it ranges from just plain vandalism to outright murder. The main characters (the news crew), along with the forensics team are left to investigate the mystery. Is this way too dark for a game?

edited 1st Jun '12 1:51:42 PM by DoubleG

No. Seems fairly standard, actually.

One important thing worth mentioning - the singular of succubi is succubus.

As for your question, depends on the sort of game. Might be a little dark for the next Wii Sports, but what do I know?

Nitpick: the singular is "succubus", which itself was a male demon morphed into female form for the purpose of seducing a man. You'd want "succuba", plural "-ae".

Thank you, and have a nice day.

Ack, ninja'd.

edited 1st Jun '12 2:36:39 PM by Muramasan13

So is there anywhere I could make this darker? Add teenagers, perhaps?

Is there a reason you want to?

Remember, a story arc should only be as dark/light as the parent story/setting can support. Otherwise, it just gets silly.

I see. The genre is more Action and Drama than Survival Horror.

x4 Er...well, it originated from "succuba"/"succubae", yeah. But a succubus is the female demon - an incubus is the male.

Unless I've gotten it wrong, in which case please correct me!

Succubus. Thank you all for correcting me. I just thought succubi was the correct term for it.

Darker? I assume the succubus' motive is to destroy people by seducing them and inflicting her curse, to let her victim's partner do her dirty work for her. Here are some suggestions.

• Once a succubus-ified person (A) and their partner (B) have relations for the first time after the succubus-ification, make the situation resemble combined rape/mindrape. The infidelity visions begin to pour into B's mind pretty much as soon as they get into full action. Make it so that the visions don't come as a flash flood but rather as a slower, detailed, more tortuous and drawn-out flow. Your average B is not going to be in mood for sexy time and will try to stop it, but since this would interrupt the vision they will need to be stopped... Here's where A's curse steps in. They'll be mind altered/brainwashed to carry out the deed into its conclusion to ensure that B's mind is filled to brim for maximum curse effectiveness.

• Make the curse's effect linger and cause mental instability in B.

• Make it so that B cannot recognise the succubus as the one who A was being faithless with. For bonus points, make their rage not subside with A's demise — B will also look to get revenge on anyone their broken mind imagines could have been A's lover.

Regarding the darkness level: What you originally described is about par for a succubus, noting that a succubus is a demon from medieval Christian mythology and as such is pretty dark.

As for whether it's dark for a game, exactly how dark a game can be is a pretty wide target. That's sort of a case-by-case thing you'll need to work out on your own.

edited 4th Jun '12 8:45:55 AM by Paul3