This is something of an alternate POV of the high school dramedy I've been writing for a good while. The character featured here is the female lead of the series, Sylvia Cruz.

Here, I'll be posting excerpts, hopefully chronologically, of Sylvia's first character arc. Unfortunately, because of her type of character, most entries will be stand alone, self-contextual, non sequitor and will probably only serve as further world building. I'll try and post every 24 or 48 hours.

Now lets start.

---

PROLOGUE – LATE AUGUST

Dear New Diary…

God knows what possessed me to buy you off of a 99 cents store. The little girl inside me’s probably itching to write the Great American Novel for shits n giggles. Who knows, maybe we have potential, and I should probably go through with it. You might just become food for thought for some other menstruating brat that thinks she’s going through the same thing. Or, worse case scenario, you’ll serve as source material for the next government sponsored PSA. Some cautionary tale that’s “Their” way of saying “This is what you get, you little punks!” But I digress.

The pen that probes you at this moment conveys my darkest thoughts and deepest emotions. And if your frail, translucent pages can stand it’s phallic menace, then I hope to keep you close to me so that you might keep me sane, or at least delay the inevitable for the time being. Don’t worry, this won’t hurt.

Much.

Love, Sylvia Cruz

---

Concept art of Sylvia◊.

edited 22nd Dec '11 9:28:33 AM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

Short and easy to read, perfect for my curmudgeonly self.

I'm watching this.

oddly

Ah, I'm going to enjoy this.

Sylvia, Schitzo, bring the offensive snarkiness! I'm dying to read!

SEPTEMBER – Dropped off at school

We’re going to try something different, diary. Well, ok, it’s not that different. But whenever we see me writing on you in the present tense, you’re going to let it slide, okay? Think of it as my cute little tribute to Gonzo Journalism. Or at least, think of it as a way to make this thing a little more entertaining. Promise you won’t laugh? It’s probably going to take me some time to get the rhythm right, but should anything about my prose bother you, rest assured, at least I’m not dumb enough to stick you into some social networking site. I know how those bastards think.

I bet you’re wondering whether or not I mean my parents, my peers or everyone else. Wouldn’t you like to know, Diary? I’m wondering what would suit us better: To keep you on my person at all times, or under lock and key? Or rather, to risk losing you out of carelessness into some public void, or to leave you at home so any unwelcome visitor, child or adult comes looking for any kinky shit. For either of our use. Engh.

Damned either way, right? See ya soon.

~Sylvia

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

Heh. She sounds like an angry writer person.

oddly

I get the feeling that Sylvia keeps herself very guarded.

edited 22nd Dec '11 2:05:30 PM by Tidal_Wave_17

Its never quite enough, Tidal. She's heard the horror stories of bad social networking site management, and how everything done on the internet is essentially carved in stone except for the most extreme cases.

Or maybe I'm just slowly, very slowly trying to worldbuild a dystopian society in the background, I dunno.

next post will be a bit lengthy and needs some of its kinks worked out, so maybe I'll post in like two days or more.

@ Atticus: Yup. Angry youth. I like the idea of that. I like the idea of teenagers with a kind of "You're gonna get your way eventually, Status Quo, but not without a fight. not without a fucking WAR" mentality going on in their heads XD

edited 22nd Dec '11 4:06:32 PM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

SEPTEMBER – History

Last time I checked, Diary, I didn’t have the word “troublemaker” branded on my forehead. Maybe something about me sets people off? I hope I’m not pissing you off already.

I was sitting in my U.S History class for the first time this semester. Lo and behold, the instructor we were scheduled with was a no-show, so my World History teacher from last year Mr. Howell is going to serve as his replacement indefinitely for this semester. Shame too. I was looking forward to having a student teacher to bug.

The voice of our newest assistant principal this year (I think her name was Dr. Shay?) crackled over the P.A. system for us to stand up for the flag salute. And well. That’s where the trouble started. What the hell for, right? Everyone in the room kinda jerks themselves off their seats, marionette-like and they place their right hand over their hearts.

Procedure. Kinda takes out the oomph out of the whole thing, doesn’t it?

And right on cue, everyone here just phones in the pledge, monotone, droning and nasally. But the entire time, Mr. Howell gives me a look that makes me wonder whether or not I should cover up a little.

Wait… I was wearing a hoodie all day long. AND it was zipped up.

…

Once everyone finishes and sits themselves down, I see Mr. Howell shake his head and beckon the whole class up.

“No, no, no, class. Stand back up. It seems that someone,” he looks straight at me, “didn’t salute.”

Oh, come on! Is this really the first time you’ve seen someone ignore the flag salute?

“Well, Sylvia,” He continues. “We’re waiting.”

“So am I, Sir.”

“Ms. Cruz” He says, “I am not starting this class until you show this classroom and this flag some respect.” He gestures to both.

Go home, ya goddamn douchenozzle!

“Do as you like, Mr Howell.” I say “At least I won’t be the one disturbing the learning process here.”

“Do you want to get kicked out of class this early in the semester?”

“At the cost of your job, Mr. Howell?”

Oh yeah. I went there.

Mr. Howell exhales and adjusts his composure. He lays his hand on his glasses, probably wondering if it would be more dramatic to pull them off or to push them in. Or if maybe he wants to shatter them just to get his point across.

“Sylvia,” He says, clearing his throat “I’m assuming you have a pretty clear idea of the lives that have been lost over centuries, just so that you even have a flag to salute to. This attitude, this… gesture of yours… are you saying that the men and women overseas fighting for our countries, defending our freedoms, are you saying their cause is meaningless?”

I… what? I look at the rest of the class, dumbfounded. Some folks are giving me a “just do it already” face. Others are at the verge of laughing. Don’t tempt me.

“Are you asking me, or are you telling me?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, young lady.” He snaps. Gee, I never expected to hear that one so soon. I clear my own throat, hoping that my imitating him doesn’t come off too obvious. I guess it’s time to pull out the big guns.

“Mr. Howell…” I say. “With all due respect, if I didn’t know as much about U.S. History as I do now, I’d be singing the Star Spangled Banner in front of the whole class right now, and with as much soul as I can muster.”

“Don’t wiseass to me, young lady.”

Aw, fuck this.

“Tell you what, Mr. Howell.” And I straighten up, folding my hands on the desk to make this sound as professional as I can. “I’ll salute to the flag as soon as you start making some sense.”

And as if he just heard the starting gun, Mr. Howell scrambles to the phone, knocking over his chair even, in order to call the office.

Petty, petty old man.

“Whoa-whoa!” I shout. “Okay! Uncle!”

He holds on the phone, and then rolls eyes and places the phone back into the receiver as soon as he sees I’m serious: standing up, right hand over my heart.

Calm the fuck down, man. You’ve won.

And here comes the cue. Ready, begin.

I swear my services
to the cult
that masturbates to demon erotica
And to the entity it represents
One raging elder god
Inconsolable
Bringing his tentacle’d judgment to all

Well, glad that’s done and over with. But why am I the only one sitting down?

… Aw fuck. They all heard me. I could have sworn I mumbled that. Mr. Howell and the class collectively look at me the same way they’d see roadkill in the making.

Okay. You can explain yourself. It’s all under control.

“Tch. Free country.”

---

The biggest trouble I had here was with the flag salute. I'm still not satisfied with it. The beta had an awkward line about ephebophilia in there*

, and because I couldn't make the rest of the stuff fit, I had no choice but to take it out and put this in instead.

edited 26th Dec '11 4:50:06 PM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

I think I love Sylvia. Seriously, she is just too awesome.

Mr. Howell sounds like a total dick, doing his best to single Sylvia out from the rest of the class and making a big deal out of nothing. She didn't salute. Big whoop.

I loved it and I can't wait for more!

Mr Howell obviously does not have the best understanding of the constitution...

Mr. Howell, being a history teacher, is very much serious business about any and all things regarding his country.

As for Sylvia, I'm trying to keep her political affiliation (if any) vague or non existent, but the "If I didn't know as much about US History" line kinda lets the cat out of the bag a bit. Or at least it shows how pissed off she is at the status quo and all apathy towards it XD

I wonder if I want 9/11 to exist in this universe. the setting of this story is contemporary, in an 'another time, another place' kinda way. If this were animated, fashions from all decades, times and places would co-exist XD

edited 26th Dec '11 5:30:40 PM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

I like the whole "wearing outfits from different decades" idea. You could make it like a trend in-story.

I was always on the opposite side of the student line. I was the good kid, and could not for the life of me understand why kids misbehaved, and even the bad teachers, I saw more kids doing themselves in, then teachers being evil douche bags.

It is with this perspective that makes me...hesitant, about Sylvia, I suppose?

That doesn't make it bad, but just a heads up that I will be biased towards her, just because she embodies what I disagree with, so it's going to be extra hard for me to like her as a character.

You may either take that as a challenge, or a chance to disregard my input for the most part.

As for my actual input...yeah, she dredges up memories of those of the smart ass apathetic blend. I don't hate her, and I will keep reading, but I definitely am having a hard time suspending disbelief without fighting the urge to say "well, gee, of course you're being treated like a troublemaker when you break social rules. That's how sociology 101 works!"

Make of this rambling what you will.

oddly

I'm trying my hardest not to make this a period piece. This could also mean little to no (blatant and obvious) shout outs. As much as I love the works that have influenced me, I don't wanna have to use them as a crutch for the storytelling.

@ Atticus: Consider this something she has to grow out of.

edited 26th Dec '11 6:13:44 PM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

Well, see, the thing is, you need to know the time period.

If this was say, the fifties, then most people would side with the teacher.

If it was modern day, as it seems to be, the history teacher seems like a douche, and other students might support her.

edited 26th Dec '11 6:08:04 PM by ohsointocats

I wish to keep this in its own world. Though if it were up to me, there'd be a few hints to something of a dystopia in the works in both the media and advertising here and there (ala Robocop :V).

Student attitude would be not so much outrage but... Well, in the words of REM, "I feel fine".

edited 26th Dec '11 6:17:01 PM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

Then I await with piqued interest.

oddly

I'm with Atticus on the last one. While she's in the right, Sylvia came off to me as the bigger dick here, by far. She could have just denied persistently but respectfully to salute. Instead she was as rude as possible, openly mocked and even threatened the teacher- and she seemed to enjoy it too. I can forgive some rudeness from her, given the situation, but not that much. So yeah, I'm currently disliking her.

Looking forward to reading more.

On the last entry... She did come across as unnecessarily rude, and I wouldn't be surprised if a fair number of readers would dislike her for that. I don't particularly dislike her, but that's mostly because I strongly agree with her on that matter (and am less bothered by rudeness).

SEPTEMBER – RICK AND CESAR

You know how they say you can’t pick the adults in your life, Diary? I suppose the same can be said of lockers. Mine’s assigned in the dead center of the southern quad. That doesn’t bother me at all. It doesn’t even bother me that this particular locker is about a head and a half higher than I am.

What bothers me is the asshats that hang round this part of town.

Rick Beaumont... I guess you could call the fella blessed. Be it college or the workplace sometime in the future, it looks like he’ll never have to put in an inch of effort in his life to get by. That’s probably how it is for all sportsmen. Of course, that wasn’t quite his story back then. But that’s for another entry.

He and some other mongoloid, god knows what is face is, were drawn into whatever prattle men of their kind engage in. Normally, I’d let that go. Even I admit to loving tits and beer. But of course, I had to get past the broad, tall lot of them to get to my new locker.

I cleared my throat to get their attention. Twice, in fact. No dice. By now, the other guy (who’s jersey reads “Mendoza”. Cute name.) is laughing at his own jokes, holding onto his sides and ramming himself into the locker walls. Time to put an end this.

“Excuse me? I’d like to get to my locker today, please?”

Rick and this Mendoza guy just glance at me for half a second before they face each other again. Rick points his thumb in my general direction.

“See what I mean?” He quips.

Fuck if I knew what the context of that was, but it earns Rick a textbook drop to the toe. If I gave a crap, I would have put in the effort to make it look like an accident. I hear from him the kind of yelp I’d never expect a boy of his stature to cry out. It’s like a cartoon, the way he’s doing the hotfoot dance, finally bringing his knee down to reach and massage his toe.

I wish I were taller. It’d make hiding the kill grin I’m sporting behind the locker door that much easier.

“An ingrown toenail, eh?” I ask, opening the hatch and grabbing my lovely toe killing textbook off the floor (I will name him Toejam, and I will love him and study him everyday). “That’s some bad hygiene, boy. I wonder why they name the worst hygiene problems after you guys. Athlete’s foot, jock’s itch, helmet hair…”

Yeah, I said helmet hair. I’m not very proud of it either, Diary. This Mendoza guy gives me a “This is between you two” look. Yeah, Okay.

I stuff the last of my things in the locker and slam it shut. I’d better get used to the idea of using two different locks. I just don’t trust these guys. I pat poor Rick’s blonde as hell head like the dog he is.

“You’ve got a game today, right? Break a leg out there.” I salute the two and walk off. “Seriously though. Please do.”

At this, I hear Mendoza chuckle. “Well well, what was that all about?”

“Oh, her?” Rick asks, still wincing at his toe. “We used to go out.”

Did we, Rick? Did we really? I don’t know if that was in jest or if he’s putting on a show for that Mendoza kid, but three years ago, that could have actually happened. Maybe he just remembers it differently. Unless I really have gone mad.

“Was she a good lay?”

Better watch your ass, Mendoza, cause it only has a week left to live.

“Yeah, uh” He says “About that…”

Yeah, Diary. About that. Lets save that thought for the next time I torture the punk, if I’m not as bored with him then as I am now. Besides, by now I’m too far away to eavesdrop anyway, not that I care.

---

I think the common theme in this story will be Sylvia's bad history with the bridges she's burned and for what reasons when she reveals them bit by bit (as well as her borderline trolling of anything that so much as looks at her funny). I hope so far she's not coming off as a Jerk Sue. This needs its build up, after all.

Course, I think she'll need to make her bad "stupid little girl" decisions too, so I might just work on that too.

edited 27th Dec '11 6:27:24 PM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

"I will name him Toejam, and I will love him and study him everyday"

I like it. She does something I probably would have done in high school if I hadn't of been such a coward.

Yep, definitely hating her now. This time it's not her actual behavior -which has my full approval-, but her comments in the diary and the general attitude they show. Such a pretentious bitch.

(Can't say she comes off as a Sue, though. I'd need more text for that.)

Re-reading the entry, I'm gonna have to say you're right, that is a bit much.

But well, after all, it's her current attitude she needs to change, and something's gonna have to bring about that change. Whether its brought on by herself or externally remains to be seen.

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.

Question, I do not get the hispanic joke. I mean, I don't get specifically why she does not believe he's hispanic. Yes.

oddly

That is seriously going to need a visual context, now that I think of it. After all, the entire series is a beta to a (series of?) film(s) in planning. I think Sylvia's taken aback by how the guy carries himself, being that she's hispanic herself.

EDIT: ... Yeah, changing that. It's useless and throwaway.

Looking back at my character sheet, I realize a lot of my characters have hispanic names.

I suppose I accidentally made the setting of this work into an Orange County back water XD

edited 27th Dec '11 6:28:05 PM by Schitzo

ALL CREATURE WILL DIE AND ALL THE THINGS WILL BE BROKEN. THAT'S THE LAW OF SAMURAI.