ITT: Songs in SpockSpeak

I wish to dedicate this verse to the alpha males who play their music at high volume
With the hood of their car retracted and the air conditioning engaged
When he enters the venue, he causes an increase in temperature
Is well endowed with resources so as to suggest that he exercises financial wisdom
He is outrageous
He is genuine
He may have psychological issues
He drinks champagne and his physique indicates health
He is hard to fluster emotionally
He is impressive
I have suspicions that he peddles illegal chemical substances
He engages in frequent air travel, however, he ensures that it is first class
His presence is a high akin to using said illegal chemical substances
He displays self-assuredness akin to that of the pilot of a seafaring vessel
When he causes vaginal lubrication
Respond by engaging in foreplay
This is the variety of male I am seeking
Indeed, you will get physically assaulted if you visually appraise my mate selection, prostitute
I said, pardon me, you are an emphatically exceptional male
I am astounded by your resemblance to Pelican Fly
You are quite introverted, and I admire your neckercheif
You far exceed the outrageousness of the male with the unspecified object obstructing his vision
Indeed, I dared to do what I have just done
Somebody please inform the crowd of my moniker and reputation
I am known by Nicki Minaj
I engage in foreplay with males
Shift expensive cars into reverse
And bid you adieu.

Females admire me because they are aware that I am capable of performing Rock and Roll. Females admire me because they are aware that I am skilled in the art of rhyming. Females admire me because they are aware that I am capable of sexual intercourse. Females admire me because they are aware that I am prompt.

I awake in the morning feeling Sean Puffy Combs

Afterwards, I grab my bifocals as I am prepared to leave for the city, however I have a quick swig of Jack Daniels, as I will not be home tonight to drink anymore of it

I am aware that you harbour strong romantic feelings for me, and that I am concerned for your welfare and general well-being. In order to summon me to your current location, the only action you need to preform is to vociferate. You are the object of my current romantic affection, in addition to being the organ that is responsible for the pumping of blood across my circulatory system. I am confident that we will not be seperated, at least for extended periods of time.

Is the nature of both you and me an inanimate object? Female, I demand that you cease your amusement-inducing actions. You have stated, contrary to my firm belief that we are a romantic couple, that we are merely in a state of informal friendship. In addition, you have said that another person is the object of your romantic affections before observing my own light-detecting organs. Because of this, the first object of my affections had sent into a cardiopathic state.

I then stated, "Human in infantile development stage", repeating that phrase twice before using an exclamation. I then repeated what I said previously, substituting the word "no" for the exclamation that I used. After that, I repeated my first statement verbatim, then thinking that I assumed that we would remain a couple for an indefinite period of time. The above was once again repeated.

edited 22nd Nov '11 7:16:36 PM by SantosLHalper

Can I make that my Facebook status?

Go ahead, or were you joking?

edited 22nd Nov '11 7:45:07 PM by SantosLHalper

I was being serious. Thanks!

what song WAS that?

Santos' song was Baby by Justin Bieber.

Oh well I dislike him, so that explains it.

I request that you inform me, learned sir, our destination on this particular journey. Perhaps it is Earth decade 1950s AD, or possibly the end of the 20th century. It was my only intent to perform music with the use of a guitar and my voice.

So abduct me, I care not. I just ask your assurance that I will be returned by my necessary deadline.

I must return by my appointed time.

Do not seek to risk your potential on a shake of the gambler's bones. Bear in mind the proverb about the particularity of a lightning bolt's landing coordinates. I implore you not to pilot this particular vehicle, as I do not wish to be tardy any more.

So abduct me, I care not. I just ask your assurance that I will be returned by my necessary deadline.

I must return by my appointed time.

edited 22nd Nov '11 8:35:21 PM by TParadox

That is not what abscond mens.

It is one definition, but I see your point.

One may abscond with an inanimate object in the way I was intending, but the fact that it is the singer changes the meaning.

edited 22nd Nov '11 8:35:57 PM by TParadox

Pedantry +1.

We are not unacquainted with feelings of romantic affection. Both parties are fully aware of the socially accepted constraints. I am contemplating committing myself entirely; you would not receive a communication of this nature from a male of the species aside from me.

It is my primary desire to convey my internal emotional state to you — causing you to become aware of and empathetic to said state is necessary.

At no time in the future shall it be my intent to relinquish you, nor to fail to meet the expectations you set forth; moreover, I shall not make rapid physical motions in a meandering manner which would ultimately lead to abandonment of you; and also, I will not cause your nasolacrimal ducts to become stimulated as a result of intense negative emotion, nor will I at any point in time make a verbal statement which is conventional to be said upon departing. Finally, the intentional verbal conveyance of a false statement shall not be done by me, and it is not the case that I will withdraw my social and emotional support from you in a manner contrary to social expectation.

Well played, sir.

Which was TParadox's song?

I am aware — indeed I am fully cognizant — of the fact that I failed to meet your expectations.
I have engaged in acts of self-deception that were lacking in wisdom.
It was my perception that it was sufficient for me to continue my existence
without making any considerations of persons other than myself.
However, at this point in time, despite the entirety of the negative mental feedback, both emotional and physical in nature,
It is currently the point in time at which it is necessary for me to act in a proper manner with respect to the fact that
Those persons toward whom you hold strong feelings of affection
Are a source of meaning which exceeds that possessed by anything else.

Consequently, while internally experiencing significant negative emotions,
it is my opinion to which I have come primarily as a result of my emotional state that the optimal course of action
is to conclude all matters,
and as a result, absent myself in perpetuity.

It is an unalterable fact that things having been done are part of that which constitutes the past; this is a source of undesirable emotional states;
things that in the past carried positive emotional associations now carry the opposite connotation.
At no point in the future will I again be capable of feelings of attachment toward another person —
the entirety of my perception and worldview seems from my perspective to be coming to a conclusion.

edited 22nd Nov '11 11:24:09 PM by Enthryn

I don't recognize that song.

edited 23rd Nov '11 1:29:24 PM by TParadox

Gravitationally accelerating in an uncontrolled manner, gravitationally accelerating in an uncontrolled manner, gravitationally accelerating in an uncontrolled manner...
The totality of it moves inexorably toward a state of annihilation

Komm, süsser Tod

Despite the fact that this is causing me great physical harm, I am in amourous relations with a fantasy story typically told to children. I am apathetic as to whether this will eventually drive me into mental illness, as I am already in a state of magically-induced misfortune.

edited 23rd Nov '11 8:15:38 PM by SantosLHalper

"Preservation Choreography", by Adult Males Lacking Head-Coverings

We are able to move our bodies rhythmically, if we so desire. We are able to abandon your companions. For your companions do not move their bodies rhythmically, and since they do not move their bodies rhythmically, I cannot truly consider them to be my allies. I declare that we are able to convey ourselves to any destination that we desire, preferably one that others will not be able to locate. We can conduct ourselves as though we originate from another heavenly body, and thus renounce this one. Additionally, we can move our bodies rhythmically.

We are able to convey ourselves to any destination that we desire. It is but early in the evening, and I am youthful. We are able to arrange ourselves in quite a fashionable manner, from our head-coverings to our lower extremities, then astonish the others with our exclamation of accomplishment. I declare that we are able to behave in the manner that we desire. In fact, if we do not take the opportunity to do so, no one shall do it for us. For example, you are free to behave in a decidedly uncouth manner and as though you are detached from society at large, while I am free to behave as though I am a person of low intelligence.

I declare that we are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. The totality is in a state of chaos. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are engaging in such an activity from one enclosure to the other. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. All involved, examine your metacarpi. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. The general populace is taking the venture. Preservation choreography. Preservation choreography. Affirmative, preservation choreography.

We are able to move our bodies rhythmically, if we so desire, and we have the entirety of our respective life expectancies to do so. As long as we exploit this right, we will not be deprived of it, and conditions will be favorable. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically, if we so desire. We are able to abandon your companions. For your companions do not move their bodies rhythmically, and since they do not move their bodies rhythmically, I cannot truly consider them to be my allies.

I declare that we are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. The totality is in a state of chaos. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are engaging in such an activity from one enclosure to the other. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. All involved, examine your metacarpi. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically. We are able to move our bodies rhythmically The general populace is taking the venture. Preservation choreography. It is the preservation choreography.

edited 26th Nov '11 2:26:58 PM by MikeK

Affirmation, indeed. With some cooing and grunts.

In seven in the morning ante meridiem, I do awake from my slumbers. I take certain measures to refresh myself (which I do so need), and proceed to descend the staircase to the first floor (which I simply must do). After procuring a curved receptacle to hold my breakfast, I fill it with digestible wheatstuff and consume it. After beholding all things, I observe that the hours and minutes and seconds are passing with much speed. As such, the chronometer continues to operate, heralding the added haste of all individuals in the vicinity. I feel the most pressing need to move toward my destination of the omnibus station. I also feel the most pressing need to board the omnibus, and from there I behold my fellows, acquaintances, and fellow students.

A quandary presents itself unto myself; should I choose the forward passenger seating position which would most certainly be a most viewful and rollicking place to be present? Or should I select instead the back passenger seating position, which would be somewhat safer? This choice is most confounding. What is the wisest decision in this situation?

It is the fifth day of the working week, indeed. Freya's Day, so named. I must proceed to dance on the Day of Frige. All individuals whom I am acquainted with has expressed their opinion that they are most eager for the week to end, yes, the week to end. It is Friggjar-dagr, or Fredag, and I must indeed perform a rhythmic performance of physical exertion to music on the fifth day of the week. All individuals that I do so know personally have expressed their opinion a second time that await the rest period between working weeks with giddy anticipation.

Celebration shall be had. Jubilation as well. Indeed. Ceremony proceedings, perhaps a banquet, yes I would say so. We shall all be jovial, be boisterous, and have a time that is both convivial as well as lively.

For we are all indeed awaiting the end of the working week.

edited 24th Nov '11 8:47:28 AM by Kraken

Celebratory hymns have entered the residential building, post meridiem
Our sole objective is to raise your spirits
And we will inflict insanity upon you
We merely aspire to observe you whilst you
Rapidly move your frame
Daily, I move with a shambling gait