ITT: We are all Pokémon Trainers

-whoosh-

Channah: -raises an eyebrow- If you say so. Might wanna be careful moving on. Since this whole thing is apparently supposed to be a trap. -sends out Basil- Now where to -

-the creaking sensation from Rose and Scarlette's fight can be heard and/or felt-

Channah: Welp...

Basil: -growls under his breath-

There is no disdain in nature, there is no humiliation.

-Gabe scooches closer-

Gabe: More irony.

-A Clamperl Magical Girl stealthy approaches the guard-

---

-Gertrude is suplexing Iron Grunts as Jared cheers-

---

-Dvorak is sitting and relaxing as he downloads Iron files to a rather spacious external hard drive-

Dvorak: <Information wants to be free!>

Contact Me!

-Air Raid wraps his tassels around Gabe, and promptly phases him out of his restraints.-

Air Raid: <Congrats, you got your first taste of being Donny Poltergeist. Now grab your stuff so we can get out of here!>

-Gabe indeed grabs his stuff-

-A pearl staff beans the guard over the head as he's dragged off-

-Gabe grins and flees-

Gabe: Thanks, both of you!

Contact Me!

Gloire: <C'est Kalosien. Idiot.>

Brynhilde: "Gloire! On y va!"

Gloire: <Oui, mademoiselle.>

The two move further into the base, following where Mason went.

Mordred, meanwhile, kicks a door open, revealing a

Mordred: <You.>

Li Shuwen: <Ready for a proper rematch?>

Mordred: <Hell. Fucking. Yes.>

Li Shuwen: <Prepare yourself!>

He opens with Flare Blitz, which Mordred barely dodges, receiving a metal claw to the side for his troubles.

Mordred jumps back as Li Shuwen turns and brings a Blazing Kick down on her, Mordred taking a page out of his book, grabbing his foot between her claws and tossing it behind her, before dashing in and slamming a Metal Burst into him, throwing him into the wall.

Li Shuwen flips in midair, landing relatively gracefully. Mordred jumps at him, before Li Shuwen grabs her, tossing her to the side.

Li Shuwen: <Kakakaka! You'll have to do better than that.>

Mordred: <You weren't my target.>

Li Shuwen: <Wh->

He's interrupted by a flash of light as a Solar Blade hits him in the side.

Artoria sets herself next to Mordred.

Artoria: <Shall we continue our debate, Li Shuwen?>

Li Shuwen: <Kakakaka! I would enjoy nothing more.>

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

Basket: <Hello, SQL. I believe you established the precedent here.>

Basket used Protect!

Basket protected herself!

Basket: <So what philosophical school are we using here anyways? Divine Command models appear to be ruled out, but you certainly aren't operating off the Non-Aggresison Principle or anything Kantian...>

<Good launch, your vortices need better alignment though. And not being an accessory to murder would help too.>

Do you highlight everything looking for secret messages?

Iron Base

<Is that something we should check out?> Helmsman asked, the Samurott’s seamitar now drenched.

<Or something to avoid?> Julius added as he placed a paw to his muzzle.

<You know this place better than I,> Talbain conceded to Channah. <Lead the way.>

[Insert Unoriginal Stinger Here]

-the fleeing Iron Grunt passes by Fortis' cell, causing the Grunt stationed by her to pause-

Iron Grunt #1: What's going on?

Iron Grunt #2: Everything's falling apart! We need to get out of here!

Iron Grunt #1: No way! Not while I'm so close to finally finishing off the star child!

Iron Grunt #2: What?

Iron Grunt #1: The only problem is I can't get my hands on it, it keeps teleporting back to this girl!

Iron Grunt #2: Then kill her!

Iron Grunt #1: What? She's like 10!

Fortis: Nuh uh! I'm 16!

Astral: <Pew!>

Iron Grunt #1: You're 16? You're way older than you look.

Iron Grunt #2: No one cares! We need to go!

Iron Grunt #1: Look, I already told you—

Iron Grunt #2: -punches the door- Cowards, all of you! Fine then, stay here and die for all I care!

-the Grunt then flees, and the other Grunt is hit by a snowball-

Iron Grunt #1: Whuh?

-followed by a much bigger, Sandshrew-shaped snowball, knocking the Grunt to the floor-

Coldsteel: <Pathetic.>

Fortis: Oh my gosh!

Pianis: Hey. Let's get out of here.

Do not fear power... fear those who wield it.

-Ever, having slipped away from Mason, is looking around for where the hostages might be, when he steps on something sharp enough to puncture his shoe-

Ever: Ow!

PEFE!Every: Uh. Sorry.

Ever: Oh, what the shit.

Spark: <We have to sell this, right?>

Ever: Mrrr.

-he glances at the floor, which has been littered with painted spikes-

...I'm gonna sock you when I get across these. Breeze, can you...?

Breeze: <^_^>

-he sweeps aside the caltrops with a wave of telekinesis-

-...-

PEFE!Every: Oh no! You have bypassed my brilliant design! Alas, I am defeated, and will retreat to fight another da—

Ever: Breeze, Telekinesis.

-and PEFE!Every is scooped off her feet-

PEFE!Every: Eep!

Ever: (innocently) Gotta sell this, right? Now come on, where are the hostages?

PEFE!Every: I will never yield any information to you!

Spark: <Down the hall and to the right!>

Ever: Curses, foiled again. I suppose I shall simply have to have Breeze extract the required information!

Breeze: <Oh, sweet! Hey, PEFE!Every, you've got scalpels, right?>

Ever: Breeze holy shit that's not what I meant

Breeze: <Awww...>

Ever: Now come on.

-he proceeds down the indicated direction, Breeze toting the "captive" PEFE!Every along-

-it is entirely possible they will encounter another one-armed ghost person and their trans relative with anxiety-

-or alternatively another monochrome Team Iron Grunt and their relative who puts on a disguise to fight crime-

SQL: <Interesting you should bring up Kant. A quick search suggests Kant's belief in the importance of one's own choices. When higher powers meddle, those choices are devalued. As legendaries are immortal or close, the harm they do is theoretically infinite, while any harm inflicted by us can only ever be finite.>

-they begin a refinement of their previous species recognition algorithm, mapping out several ideal target points on Basket-

SQL used Lock-On!

Nurture: <...Yeah, uh, what they said. But thanks for the advice! I'll keep it in mind!>

-she hunkers down, and her leaves seem to become greener-

Nurture used Growth!

Sam: ...Our team seems to have this handled.

Sam: What's going on?

Sam: A whole lot. @_@

Dunsparce didn't stop being a thing or anything.

Silas starts running as the turret starts firing, <AH! Arceus! Why?!>

He leaped from platform to platform, trying his best to dodge the flame bursts, though his tail did get a little singed on one burst, <AAAAH! OW OW OW OW!>

"Hey! You have Aura! Use it!" Hacks shouts at Silas, "You have powers and you aren't using them?"

Silas catches what Hacks means and as he gets closer to the door, tosses a few Aura Spheres at the turret, before turning his attention to the door, tossing aura spheres at the bulls-eyes.

-Phoenix looks around, warily.-

Phoenix, whispering: Hide us somewhere and they won't get us.

Iron Guard: ...Why do you care?

Phoenix: Doesn't matter. I do.

Iron Guard: ... *sigh* I don't have much of a choice. I'll cut your throat if you betray me, though.

Phoenix: You're not the one I'm betraying today.

-The guard hides Phoenix out of sight, then hides himself.-

-As it turns out, Ever and PEFE!Every encounter another monochrome Team Iron Grunt and their trans relative with anxiety, because sometimes that's just how it is on this bitch of an Earth.-

Liam: A-aaah!

-He reels and puts a finger gun to Lucius's head.-

Liam: Whoever you are, d-don't move! I have a hostage and I won't h-hesitate!

Lucius: Wait...

-He coughs weakly.-

Lucius: ...Ever, is that...?

edited 30th Apr '18 3:59:10 PM by Herbert40k

Trans rights are human rights. JK Rowling preaches hate. If you sit at a table with five bigots and say nothing, there are now six bigots.

Li Shuwen attempts to Flame Kick Artoria, who dodges and pins his leg, while Mordred moves in and knocks his other leg out from under him.

Artoria drops his leg, slamming a Hidden Power into his chest, while Mordred slams a Bullet Punch into him.

Li Shuwen manages to disentagle himself from the two, backing up and charging at Mordred with a Flare Blitz, sending her flying into a wall.

Unfortunately, that leaves him open for another Solar Blade from Artoria, sending him flying and collapsing to the ground.

Li Shuwen: <Kakaka... It would seem I am beat. Excellent. Your strength, your skills...>

His trainer runs up to the door.

Iron Grunt: "Li, we're leaving."

Li Shuwen: <Yes... Julius.>

The Iron Grunt Julius recalls Li Shuwen, before running off, offering a curt nod to Artoria and Mordred.

Mordred: -extending a scarf to Artoria- <I brought you this...>

Artoria: <Thank you, Mordred.>

The two, not having any healing items between them, turn human and walk out, Mordred leaning on Artoria.

Mordred: "Holy shit he hits hard... I wanna fight him again"

Artoria: "I guarantee you will get the chance again."

Mordred: "I damn well better."

All are significantly abnormal in a normal world... All are significantly normal in an abnormal world.

 Team Iron Safehouse 

-Walking forward-

Now where is that fool, his Aura's leading right this way...

Eating a Vanilluxe will give you frostbite.

-Aphrodite is using Buoy to Hydro Pump opposing Pokemon into submission, laughing maniacly-

-Rod is having Alexandria electrify the Hydro Pumps-

---

-A Kartana THUNKS next to the head of the guard to Sora's cell, distracting him long enough for an Electivire to barrel in to him-

-Leeya, Nina, and Laura arrive on the scene to break Sora free-

Sora: Took you long enough. Who's the shrimp? I know the redhead's my Driftloon.

Leeya: This is Laura! I'm gonna make her my new apprentice!

Laura: Science power!

Nina: Let's just get out of here.

---

-Under Robin's directions Sam is "stealing" Iron guards and dumping them outside-

-Arika is helping by sneaking up on and restraining them, with Tiana assisting-

---

-A shovel is thrown in the face of the guard to Bartelby's cell, followed by a jet of flame scaring him off-

-Duolis and the rest of the Phantom Force minus Nina arrive, Duolis cutting Bartelby free-

Human!Bartleby: You've made a lot of new weremons...

Duolis: And we've gotten some potential new recruits. -gestures to Odin and Medea-

Medea: <My pleasure.>

Odin: <I'm helping!>

Molph: We'll escort you and the others out sir.

---

-Neon is riding Haku in his armor and PUNCHING any enemy that gets close-

-Nero is sending others into a tizzy with Air Slash and Revalation Dance-

---

-Dvorak taps his claws on the desk. His download of the Iron network is almost done but getting slow-

edited 30th Apr '18 3:51:28 PM by Umbramatic

Contact Me!

-Scarlette scowls and sends out a nervous Salandit, and a much more threatening-looking shiny Dhelmise.-

Scarlette: Pun-Pun, Chantey, do your worst.

Pun-Pun: <I-I-I don't think this is the right— >

Chantey: Arr, don't be tellin' me yer lilying out on this, are ya? Methinks that might not be the wisest of decisions, lizard.

Pun-Pun: <Eep!>

Rose: ...They don't deserve this. None of you did, but your team does even less. Focus on taking out Chantey, guys.

-Nora grins, discharging another Thunder Wave at Chantey. Domino sweeps in and starts jabbing at the seaweed clinging to Chantey's anchor.-

Chantey: Arr, ye think that's enough? I've had worse!

-Chantey lashes his anchor out, wrapping it around Domino and slamming him into the ground.-

Chantey used Anchor Shot!

Domino: <Ack!>

Chantey: Come on, lizard, get to it!

Pun-Pun: <A-ah!>

-In a panic, Pun-Pun spits a Poison Gas at Domino and Nora, who both start coughing.-

Nora and Domino were poisoned!

Nora: <Eeeeeugh, gross...>

Domino: <That could be bad...>

Nora: <Yeah, uh, I don't think this gonna be great for me, Pix will have a way better time here.>

-She charges up a Volt Switch...-

Chantey: Aha, no ye don't!

-Only for a second Anchor Shot to lock her in place as well. The Volt Switch goes off, but rather than returning to swap out for Pixie, she just gets swung into the floor.-

Nora: <Ow! Rude!>

Chantey: Heheh... good luck running off now...

Domino: <This really is an issue.>

-He starts pecking at Chantey again, but a Venom Drench from Pun-Pun weakens it midway through.-

Domino: <Oog...>

Pun-Pun: <I-I'm sorry, we can't let you escape!>

Nora: <All right, you know what? You're going down too, squirt.>

-She glows, and blasts Pun-Pun with a Psychic.-

Pun-Pun: <Owww!>

Rose: Yeah, we can't have you keep doing that, I'm sorry. Domino, let's put a stop to Pun-Pun quickly.

-She crosses her arms. Domino prepares himself, taking advantage of Chantey's paralysis to put some slack in the chains. Rose the pose, spins around, and presses a hand against the ground.-

Domino surrounded himself with Z-Power!

-Domino's Aura flares up, and he rushes toward Pun-Pun, driving him straight into the ground full-force.-

Pun-Pun fainted!

---

-The building's foundations groan.-

---

-Scarlette grits her teeth.-

Scarlette: ...Damn it. No more games. Gus, we have the advantage now, let's finish them!

-The Lycanroc walks up onto the battlefield... and then turns to face Scarlette.-

Gus: <No.>

-Everything falls silent. Scarlette gapes. Rose just stares in confusion.-

Scarlette: ...What...?

Gus: <She's right. You're going too far. You're not the same person I was assigned to protect anymore.>

-Scarlette hisses.-

Scarlette: Excuse me? What happened to unending loyalty? Are you serious?

Gus: <Deadly serious. Stop this now.>

Scarlette: ...

-She narrows her eyes.-

Scarlette: ...No. No, we're just going to kill you too. Chantey!

Chantey: Finally, enough delaying! Crew, bring down the walls!

---

-There is the sound of multiple explosions.-

-And then the walls creaking more, before they start to cave in.-

Edited by BittersweetNSour on Aug 20th 2018 at 5:42:48 AM

Phoenix: I know that noise...

-Phoenix goes pale.-

Phoenix: Left pocket. Left pocket. Left pocket left pocket LEFT POCKET

-The guard reaches into Phoenix's confiscated coat and throws a pokéball at the last second.-

-CRASH-

-Phoenix and the guard wince... for no reason. A familiar Nidoking struggles to hold up the collapsed walls with his tail.-

Lawrence: <Arceus... damnit... Caleb...>

-Lawrence flings the dangerous walls away and collapses.-

Lawrence: <Every Monday...>

-The Guard stares at the door, Pokè Ball in hand.-

Jessica: "Dude"

"You suck"

Iron Guard: "Shut up, bitch!"

Jessica: "I'm sure they want to study me. The dude who broke my nose probably got fired. Do you want to?"

"That's what I thought."

---

Tsunami: <Locked. I'll bust it down.>

Shaun: "I have a better idea."

-He checks the shotgun's dial. Sure enough, sandiwiched between "stun" and "KO" is an option labeled "breach".-

Shaun: "On 3."

"Three!"

-He fires two shots into the latch and quickly switches to "KO".-

Iron Guard: "What the fu-"

-He takes a shotgun blast to the chest. Shaun pumps the shotgun to let it cool.-

Jessica: "Took you long enough."

Shaun: "I could leave you chained there."

Jessica: "Enjoying the site? I have fuzzy ones in my bag."

-Beowulf coughs.-

Jessica: "Right. Keys are in the guards pocket. Beowulf, come fix my nose."

-Shaun digs in the guard's pocket.-

~Let me in.~

Wh-

~Just do it.~

-Shaun relents. He stays still while Beowulf fixes Jessica's nose.-

Beowulf: <Impressive memory.>

Shaun: "Here."

-He unlocks Jessica's cuffs. Jessica grabs her stuff.-

Shaun: "Let's go kick some ass."

-He tosses Jessica the shotgun.-

-Then the building shakes.-

Jessica: "Fuck."

Shaun: "Beowulf, take her and go."

Jessica: "Wha-"

-Shaun snatches Fluffles' ball while Beowulf grabs Jessica and Tsunami. Tsunami reluctantly grabs the Grunt before Beowulf teleports away.-

edited 30th Apr '18 4:04:35 PM by SwiftSeraph

"Dang that sure is totally poggers my good bitch"

-Everyone notices the noise-

Duolis: Evacuation maneuvers, NOW!

-The Phantom Force start shadowporting people and mons out of the building, including Iron grunts-

-Sam starts stealing allies out of the building as well-

---

-Dvorak notices and groans, his download still not done.-

Dvorak: <What a bother...>

Contact Me!

The Mysterious Seas of Makbeliv

~Splash~

-Oh great, now Pent's in the water. Well, he just has to deal with it and start swimming towards the shape that seems to be large and unmoving. It's probably stable enough to stand on-

It's clearly a case of backroom political albumizing.

-Rose's eyes go wide as she hears the chaos throughout the building.-

Rose: Scarlette, what the hell?!

Scarlette: Brings back memories, doesn't it, Paula? Watching someone in their final moments as you bring down a building on them?

Rose: No, it doesn't! I still don't have any fucking memories, asshole! Guys, we need to get out of here right away, if she wants to stay here and get buried alive that's her own fucking fault!

Chantey: Ah-ah-ah, I'm afraid not, lass, you and yer team is staying right here.

Gus: <Release them, Chantey.>

Chantey: Psh, yer trying to bark orders now?

Nora: <Ugh, we don't have time for your bad puns or your stupid hostage crap!>

-She uses another Psychic to try to loosen the chains. Domino starts Drill Pecking again.-

Chantey: Arr! It's hopeless! Even if you do break out, it's too late!

Gus: <Release them!>

-He Crunches down on Chantey.-

Chantey: Ack!

-Angrily, he swings his chains with Domino and Nora wrapped up in them.-

Chantey used Heavy Slam!

Nora: <Oof...>

-Nora collapses from the force of the impact.-

Rose: Damn it! Pixie, let's finish this and get out of here!

-She sends out the Arcanine, who looks around frantically.-

Pixie: <What's going on?>

Rose: The fucking building's coming down, get Domino out of those chains so we can escape!

Pixie: <But what about Scarlette— >

Rose: She's trying to kill us, forget about her!

-Pixie whimpers, and looks at Chantey, who is still being bitten by Gus and pecked by Domino-

Pixie: <Okay...>

-She fluffs up, and charges at Chantey with a Flare Blitz.-

Chantey: Aaaaack!

-The chains loosen, and Gus puts a final burst of strength into another Crunch, before tossing Chantey aside.-

Chantey: Urk...

Chantey fainted!

Scarlette: ...

-Scarlette looks at the scene, and listens to the collapsing building around her.-

Scarlette: ...It's too late. It's too late for you! There are no escapes left! It's over!

???: Come on, don't start doing the monologue thing, that's just embarrassing.

-Scarlette blinks, goes wide-eyed, and turns around.-

-Right there, in the doorway, is a certain Rose lookalike, idly sipping a bottle of Croagunk Cola.-

Paula: Yeah, yeah, it's ya girl. Heya.

Channah: -eyes widen slightly at the sound of the explosions-

Basil: -yelps as the wall he's standing next to abruptly buckles and the ground starts shifting-

Channah: -looks at Colt- Run?

There is no disdain in nature, there is no humiliation.

-Noelle runs to Fortis' cell-

Noelle: Aaaaaaaaa are you okay? I was worried sick about you and Astral!

Fortis: Uh huh, I'm fine. They didn't hurt me.

Astral: <Pew.>

Pianis: Hey, what about me?

Noelle: What about you? You seem fine too.

-suddenly, a tremor shakes the building!-

Fortis: Oh my gosh!

Astral: <Pew!>

-Fortis and Astral suddenly disappear in a flash of light-

Pianis: What?

Noelle: Huh?

Iron Grunt #1: Nooo! You fools, you let the star child get away!

Pianis: I think we have bigger problems right now.

-Fortis and Astral reappear here-

Fortis: Oh my gosh!

Astral: <Pew>

Fortis: Hey, wait a sec! You mean you could have done that the whole time?

Astral: <Pew pew.>

Fortis: But what about the birdies? They're still in there!

Astral: <Pew pew?>

Do not fear power... fear those who wield it.

Team Iron No Longer Safehouse

<Run.> Talbain responded bluntly.

<Run.> Everyone chorused.

And so they did.

[Insert Unoriginal Stinger Here]

 Team Iron "Safe"house 

-As the base shakes-

Muddy: <Tagg, we need to hurry up and find them!>

-Dodging falling debris-

I know that!

Eating a Vanilluxe will give you frostbite.