What An Idiot / Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

• During the climax of the previous book, Harry witnessed Cedric get murdered and was then tortured and almost killed by Voldemort — and immediately after he escaped, Crouch Jr. made another attempt on his life. Such things would be extremely traumatizing for anyone.
  You'd Expect: That Dumbledore would provide some form of counselling for Harry over the summer holidays to help him work through his trauma — assuming, of course, that the Wizarding community has any form of emotional therapy, which would be another level of collective idiocy if it doesn't have.
  Instead: Harry is left by himself at Privet Drive, with no contact with other wizards, stewing in his own PTSD. By the time he's brought back to the Wizarding World (prompted by a Dementor attack, another distressing event), he's an emotional time bomb on the edge of exploding, and only gets worse when he finds out everyone's been calling him a big liar and doesn't believe that Voldemort is back.
• Voldemort is trying to lure Harry to the Ministry of Magic in order to retrieve a Prophecy about the two of them. His strategy is to use Legilimency to make Harry dream about the place, and want to explore it in person. Dumbledore realises this, and also figures out that Harry and Voldemort have a mental connection that Voldemort could use to spy on Dumbledore through Harry. In response to all of this, Dumbledore arranges to have Harry learn Occlumency, so that he can stop having these dreams.
  You'd Expect: Given that Dumbledore had decided at the end of book four that the time was right to tell Harry about the prophecy, Dumbledore to just tell Harry about the mental connection, the prophecy and Voldemort's plans for retrieving it, and explain that this is why he has to learn Occlumency. That way, Harry might be more motivated to do so. Even if he's really unwilling to tell Harry about the prophecy, he only needs to tell him a Cliff Notes version of the story: "Harry, the Department of Mysteries houses a weapon Voldemort is seeking but cannot have by himself, so he might try to get you to travel there and get it for him." After all, Harry has already worked to impede Voldemort from stealing the Philosopher's/Sorcerer's Stone, and it would be easy for him to understand.
  Instead: No-one tells Harry anything other than "you MUST learn Occlumency because we say it", "Voldemort and you might be able to read each other's mind, but you must NOT do it even though it has proved really useful" and "There is NOTHING in the Department of Mysteries that concerns you".
  As A Result: Harry doesn't take the lessons as seriously as the Order would like him to, remains curious about the Department of Mysteries related dreams he keeps having, and is surprised when the Order consider it a big deal that Snape's no longer teaching him.
  You'd Also Expect: Since Dumbledore was the person the prophecy was made to and can therefore recall it word for word whenever he wants through the Pensieve, he would have the copy at the Department of Mysteries destroyed since it's worthless to him but extremely valuable to Voldemort. A simple Reductor Curse is shown to be enough to destroy any prophecy and unlike physically removing it, this doesn't have to be done by a subject of the prophecy so Dumbledore could send any Order member to do it.
  Instead: Dumbledore has the Order guard the prophecy from Voldemort's attempts to steal it.
  The Result: Arthur Weasley is almost killed on guard duty, Voldemort nearly succeeds in stealing the prophecy, the prophecy gets destroyed anyway, Sirius is killed, and Dumbledore finally shares the version of the prophecy in his head with Harry, making the whole exercise All for Nothing.
• Dumbledore's choice of Occlumency teacher also counts, as he admits at the end of the book.
  You'd Expect: Dumbledore to either teach Harry himself, or at least, in case he is that determined to put distance among Harry and him, try and find someone else to do the job.
  For instance: Mad-Eye Moody, even with him still recovering from being imprisoned in his own trunk by Crouch Jr. for the past year, would have been a possible option to give Harry a crash course during holidays. With how Moody preaches about "constant vigilance" and his paranoia, it's hard to imagine him not having learned Occlumency at some point in his career as an Auror to protect his secrets. Even in Hogwarts, whose staff includes very knowledgeable wizards like Flitwick or McGonagall, it would be surprising that no other teacher had at least some notion of Occlumency. For that matter, since Draco Malfoy proves it's possible for a talented student to learn Occlumency over the course of one summer if he has a competent teacher and the decision that Harry needs to learn Occlumency isn't made until mid-term, Dumbledore has enough time to train literally anyone to be an Occlumens from scratch, and still have them finish teaching Harry before end-of-term.
  You'd Also Expect: Dumbledore to have instructed the entire Order of the Phoenix in Occlumency from the beginning, as it is an incredibly useful ability they certainly need in those times.
  Instead: He gets Snape to try and teach Harry Occlumency, a magical art that is based on controlling your emotions, when the two of them have a longstanding mutual hatred and are visibly incapable of so much as being in the same room without enraging each other by their very presence.
  Unsurprisingly: The arrangement becomes a fantastic train-wreck in record time, with Harry peeking at some of Snape's private memories while he's out of the room and Snape refusing to continue in response.
• Ron becomes the keeper for the Gryffindor Quidditch team, of which his brothers Fred and George are the Beaters. It soon becomes apparent that Ron has huge confidence issues on the pitch, which greatly affect his ability to play.
  You'd Expect: Fred and George would try and give Ron some form of emotional support, if only because their chances of winning the Quidditch Cup are somewhat dependent on their brother's performance as a keeper. They're certainly capable of doing this, judging from their attempts to cheer up Harry the first time he failed to win a Quidditch game.
  Instead: They initially choose to make fun of Ron for being a prefect, and do absolutely nothing to help him get over his Quidditch insecurities.
  Result: It gets to the point that after Fred and George leave Hogwarts, Ron's performance drastically improves in their absence.
• Since the beginning of the year, the Ministry of Magic has been steadily antagonising Harry and Dumbledore, painting the kid as a liar and a madman in media and staunchly refusing to accept Voldemort's return. Then a Ministry official, Dolores Umbridge, is appointed the Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts, and at her first lesson, she makes it perfectly clear that she's upholding this policy and assures children that "there's nothing dangerous out there" and they don't need to practice defence magic.
  You'd Expect: After this first lesson at the least, Harry would try to keep his mouth shut, since, frankly speaking, he has no proof of Voldemort's return and won't achieve anything by proclaiming it again, aside from making Umbridge predictably want to punish him.
  Or: He could've countered Umbridge's assurances by mentioning Sirius. The Ministry can't deny Sirius's existence, and since they've failed to capture him, they also can't deny he was a threat either. This would have admittedly not gained him any points against Umbridge, but it at least would have undermined further her already weak position in the students' eyes.
  Instead: He tries to claim that Voldemort has returned, with no proof other than his word.
  As A Result: He convinces no one and ends up with a week of detentions.
• During said detentions, Umbridge forces Harry to magically carve the words "I must not tell lies" into the back of his hand.
  You'd Expect: Harry to inform Professor McGonagall and/or Dumbledore and show them the scar. If there are still suspicions, use the Pensieve or take one of them (or anybody else) with him under the Invisibility Cloak for his next detention, and then have them write to the Department of Magical Law Enforcement. While the Ministry is unlikely to be fair to Harry, even in its newfound Jerkass mode they would have a hard time ignoring accusations that a Ministry employee is mutilating children, especially without the students' parents knowing.
  Instead: He suffers silently, not wanting to give Umbridge the satisfaction of seeing him complain and not wanting to talk to Dumbledore due to being angry at him for keeping Harry in the dark, and lets her continue her reign unchallenged. Hermione actually begs him to tell Professor McGonagall, but he refuses.
• Cho Chang decides to join the illegal defence group Harry had set up. She also has a friend, Marietta Edgecombe, whose mother works at the Ministry of Magic, and would therefore be likely to lose her job if her daughter got on the wrong side of Umbridge.
  You'd Expect: Cho not put Marietta under any pressure to join, or even safer, to keep Marietta in the dark about the group, if anything for her own good.
  Instead: She makes Marietta come to the meeting with her (her words), effectively lumping her with the group whether she likes it or not.
  As A Result: Things are all well and dandy for about six months, but then Marietta reports the group to Umbridge, and Dumbledore is forced to take the blame for it to protect all the students involved. Marietta, meanwhile, is left disfigured and viewed as a traitor as a result of her "betrayal", whereas Cho — who was technically responsible for all of this — faces absolutely no consequences as a result of her actions.
• Marietta, having been forced to join the DA, thinks twice and decides to act in order not to endanger her mother's job in the Ministry.
  You'd Expect: Marietta to simply abandon the group. She can tell Harry and Hermione the truth, that her ability to defend herself doesn't outweigh her family's economic stability right now, and they will probably accept it no problem as long as she doesn't act against the group's interests either. If Marietta is not assertive enough to do it, she can always ask Cho for aid, as she knows it too and will help them to understand it. She should also remember that there's an unknown jinx on those who rat out the group.
  Instead: She betrays the entire group to Umbridge, seemingly of her own volition. By doing this, she doesn't only sell out a good portion of the student body, but also her very best friend, just to "save her mother's job." Harry even lampshades this when confronting Cho about it, how it's a lousy excuse because for nearly seven months, they had been successfully doing the classes with no outsiders the wiser.
• Adding onto this is the betrayal on Cho in particular. Marietta knows that Umbridge threatens to expel anyone who breaks her Educational Decrees, and it's weighted against the houses so that Ravenclaw would get no second chances.
  You'd Expect: Marietta to realize that this means her very best friend would get expelled for participating in the DA and keep her mouth shut. Cho has already suffered a massive trauma from losing her boyfriend to Voldemort, and being expelled wouldn't exactly improve it.
  Instead: Marietta rats out everyone in the DA, including her best friend. Again, Harry later directly lampshades to Cho that Marietta threw her under the bus and didn't show remorse for that.
  As a Result: While Cho improbably forgives Marietta, in part because it's implied Marietta was the only friend who stayed with her after Cedric died, it makes Marietta a pariah and known as the student that sold out Dumbledore to Umbridge. It also means that Harry and Cho break up before they can even start a relationship, because Harry points out this particular fact to Cho.
• There's also the matter of Hermione's security measures. She's capable of enchanting the sign-up sheet so that if anyone breaks their oath of silence, a spell is cast.
  You'd Expect: The spell in question would have a practical effect. For example, if any one person breaks their vow, all the others would be immediately warned by some kind of alarm. Alternatively, have it inflict a Tongue-Tying Curse or Silencio or something similar to shut people up before they can say too much.
  You'd Also Expect: Hermione would warn the members that the sign-up sheets is enchanted. Not only does it deter betrayal by making the consequences clear, on pure ethical grounds the applicants should know the details of the contract they're signing.
  Instead: She curses any betrayer with facial disfigurement spelling out the word "SNEAK", which only takes effect after they've told someone about the group. It thus serves no purpose other than petty revenge, which would have been especially unfair had Umbridge used some sort of involuntary coercion to get Marietta to talk (like the Cruciatus or Imperius Curses, or Veritaserum). The measure also makes Hermione come off even worse after being arrested, as she could be now charged with disfiguring a fellow student aside from belonging to a forbidden group.
  As A Result: Marietta is able to tell Umbridge everything and only afterwards does she realise she's been cursed in this particularly vindictive fashion (it's still there the next year!).
• Harry receives a package from his godfather, who implies that Harry can use it to keep in contact with him while he's at Hogwarts.
  You'd Expect: That Harry would open and have a look at the package, to see what it is, even if he doesn't plan on using it.
  Instead: He doesn't, apparently afraid that if he so much as opens it, his godfather will get in trouble. It turns out to just be a magical equivalent of a walkie-talkie, whose usefulness would have been absolutely invaluable for them. It also turns out that he later wants to talk with Sirius after all, but he still doesn't remember the package.
  The Result: Whenever he wants to talk to his godfather, he has to break into Umbridge's office.
  Now You'd Expect: That the first time Harry did this, Sirius would tell him to use the mirror, so that they can talk safely in the future. It's already weird that Sirius didn't even ask Harry why was he using the dangerous Floo Network when he should have the mirror with him.
  Instead: Sirius never gets around to it. Granted, he's not alone with Harry during the conversation, and he may have had his reasons for not wanting Lupin in on the secret of the mirror. However, you'd think he could at least have said, "Remus, I'd like a private word with my godson, if you don't mind," a request which Lupin would no doubt have respected.
  You'd Also Expect: That the Order in general would take care of providing Harry with means of emergency communication, not to mention extraction. They know that the boy is a trouble magnet, that the Ministry is being openly hostile to him, and that Voldemort is downright after his head. Especially since Harry knows how to cast a Patronus and that's a foolproof message system; all they had to do was teach him that and the entire climax could have been avoided.
  Instead: Nobody gives a damn, except Sirius, and he's so conflicted and guilt-tripped by everyone for being possessive of Harry that he ends up being Master of the Mixed Message, and of course it leads to a disaster.
• To counter the Ministry of Magic's slander campaign against Harry, Hermione arranges to have Harry interviewed for an article in the Quibbler, so that he can tell his side of the story.
  You'd Expect: That Hermione would tell Harry of her plans well in advance of the actual interview.
  Instead: She just vaguely tells Harry to meet her in the Three Broomsticks shortly before a visit to Hogsmeade, despite knowing that he's going on a date with Cho during that time.
  Result: When Harry tells Cho that he has to meet Hermione later that day, Cho doesn't take kindly to the implications of Harry seeing another girl, with the result that their blossoming romance is almost completely torpedoed. And Hermione later has the gall to blame Harry for being "tactless".
• Harry sees a vision of Sirius being tortured at the Department of Mysteries. Instead of wondering how either Voldemort or Sirius, the two biggest fugitives in the country, got into the middle of the government building, and knowing that he shares a mind-link with Voldemort, who himself has learned this and could use it to his advantage, Harry doesn't even consider that it might be a trap. Even worse, he plans to personally rush off to fight Voldemort one-on-one, even though the blood protection doesn't even work anymore and he doesn't know if their wands connection will save him again as in the previous book (which, if Voldemort is not alone or arranging a duel again, will likely not).
  You'd Expect: Harry to play it cool and consider that such a convenient vision might be a trap, specifically the exact kind of trap he has been warned about for months. With the safety that it is improbable the vision is real, he can try to reach out to any available member of the Order, like McGonagall or Snape, send owls to any other member (even though he doesn't know exactly where Dumbledore is, an owl might be able to find him), or go to Grimmauld Place on a broomstick.
  Instead: Although he does check Grimmauld Place at Hermione's urging, and receives a (nebulous and not quite reliable) testimony by Kreacher that Sirius has gone to the Department, he still doesn't consider that it might be a trap, and flies straight into the Ministry believing that surely, there's no way Voldemort himself could possibly be a threat.
• Harry happens to end up in front of Snape, to whom he yells, "He's got Padfoot! He's got Padfoot at the place where it's hidden." Snape acts like he has no idea what Harry is talking about.
  You'd Expect: Harry to realize the incredibly obvious fact that Snape can't speak clearly in front of Umbridge (something Dumbledore points out later), especially because this is the reason he's giving Snape a coded message in the first place, and to check in with him once he's gotten rid of Umbridge.
  Instead: Harry assumes that Snape either doesn't know what he's talking about or simply doesn't care enough for Sirius, and resolves to go up against Voldemort with a few teenagers.
• Umbridge gets Snape to give her some truth potion, which she plans to use to interrogate Harry on the location of two of his most important people, both of whom are fugitives. Snape, who is a renowned expert in the field of potions, tells Umbridge that she only needs to use three drops of the stuff for it to work.
  You'd Expect: Umbridge to remember this when the time comes to do the deed, especially since, as said, Snape is a potions expert and she is not.
  Instead: She uses up the whole bottle. This, by the way, sounds like a horrible idea regardless of the potion; for what we know, had Harry taken it (and had it not been fake Veritaserum, as it later turns out), he might have probably suffered some kind of dangerous overdose, which at the very least would have destroyed Umbridge's chance to interrogate him.
  Even Worse: That bottle is Snape's last sample of that potion (so he claims, anyway, and she has no way to prove him wrong), and it takes a month to make. Of course, Dumbledore later tells Harry that Snape gave her fake potion that would have been a No-Sell; in the film it was real, but she used it on Cho Chang instead.
  As a Result: There's not a drop of the potion in the castle the next time she needs it.
  And on Top of That: She not only pours the whole bottle into Harry's drink, but then fails to even see to it that Harry actually drinks it. Harry defeats her by the simple ruse of raising his cup to his lips but not actually opening his mouth, and Umbridge — despite looking directly at him the entire time — unaccountably fails to notice that Harry is not swallowing anything, and that Harry's robes are stained from where he spilled some of the tea on himself to lower the liquid level in his cup.
  You'd Also Expect: Umbridge, who's a government veteran, to be able to dissemble convincingly in front of a teenage boy, even one who's already suspicious of her.
  Instead: She acts in a manner that practically screams "I have given you that drink for nefarious purposes."
• Hermione and Harry manage to lure Umbridge into the Forbidden Forest by claiming that Dumbledore is keeping a weapon hidden there. The trio are then confronted by the resident herd of centaurs, who generally don't take kindly to wizards intruding in their territory.
  You'd Expect: Umbridge to decide that staying alive is far more important than fulfilling her Fantastic Racism quota for the week, and not do anything to provoke the centaurs.
  Instead: In a supreme display of being Too Dumb to Live, she repeatedly insults and tries to boss around the huge herd of centaurs surrounding her.
  As a Result: The herd promptly drags her off into the forest, and while we don't see what happened to her after that, it was rough enough to give her PTSD.
  Bonus: There's a point in which Umbridge trips on a root and falls to the ground behind them, and all their reaction is merely not to help her up. The thought of pouncing on her at once and capitalize on the moment to wrestle her wand away, especially given that they are two on one and much younger than her, doesn't even cross their heads.
• Right after the above scene, the centaurs are deciding what to do with Harry and Hermione. One of them points out that they bought Umbridge here, and that Harry is nearly an adult, implying that they won't have to worry about breaking their rule of not hurting children.
  You'd Expect: Hermione, who is typically very knowledgeable about the wizarding world in general, to remember that a major Berserk Button for centaurs is the idea of serving wizards, and therefore say something along the lines of "We were trying to find Grawp, so he could get rid of Umbridge. We never meant to run into you guys!". After all, she has just put a very convincing act towards Umbridge.
  Instead: She straight-up tells them that she was hoping they would deal with Umbridge for her.
  As a Result: The centaurs, furious at being used, decide that Harry and Hermione can share Umbridge's fate, and the pair are only saved thanks to Grawp randomly showing up.
• Voldemort lures Harry to the Ministry of Magic and sends his goons there to retrieve the important Prophecy that only Harry can touch.
  You'd Expect: Lucius Malfoy, who's in charge of the operation, would only take those Death Eaters who, like him, had weaselled their way out of Azkaban and into the Ministry ranks, and thus would have a legitimate excuse to be there by claiming they are doing extra hours or something (or, alternatively, send only the escapees, whose identities wouldn't be any more compromised if they got identified). When the kids arrive, ambush them right in the atrium, disarm and/or stun, and take hostage, and threaten to kill them if Harry doesn't cooperate. Then walk the now cooperative Harry straight to the storage and make him take the Prophecy orb.
  Instead: He takes the recent escapees from Azkaban with him, so when the cavalry arrives, his true allegiances are exposed (and in the film, he even removes his mask himself!). They then waste time in the storage, waiting for Harry to come to them and stumble upon the prophecy, and only reveal themselves after Harry takes the orb, and they can no longer shoot him with spells for the fear of breaking it.
• During the events at the Ministry, we see that the Time Turners are kept on an open shelf, without any locks, guards, or alarms and in a room accessible to a bunch of kids. The power to rewrite the timeline is there for the taking.
  You'd Expect: That of the numerous people who infiltrated the Ministry that night, someone, be it heroes or villains, would realise the tremendous potential and help themselves to a Turner or two.
  Instead: They are completely ignored. In fact, all of the Time Turners are destroyed by a missed Stunning Spell from Neville and fall into a consistent loop of falling, shattering, and repairing themselves.
• The prophecy ball Voldemort wants is kept in the Department of Mysteries in the Ministry of Magic. It can only be obtained by himself, or Harry Potter.
  You'd Expect: That Voldemort would simply sneak in and steal it, seeing as Harry and five other kids practically waltzed in there undetected, despite the fact that Harry is high on the list of people the Ministry is against at the time. It's not like he cannot disguise himself, up to turning invisible, or murder any possible witnesses.
  Instead: Voldemort decides that it is too dangerous to attempt this as he will probably be discovered and the world will know he is alive again. Naturally, Voldemort tricks Harry into stealing the prophecy. Then the Death Eaters try to steal it from him before he escapes.
  Inevitably: The plan falls apart as the Death Eaters have to take precautions not to shatter the prophecy, leading to Harry and the gang getting an advantage.
  Even Worse: Voldemort, who claimed it was too dangerous for him to enter the Ministry, enters the Ministry, just after the prophecy gets destroyed, without a disguise, revealing himself and making his plan less than useless.
• Sirius Black is under an imposed house arrest for most of the duration of this book.
  You'd Expect: That since Sirius has proven quite capable and competent — escaping Azkaban entirely on his own and being on the lam for most of Book 3 and Book 4 — Dumbledore and the Order would stop being irritating and condescending to him, and also trust him with some small missions with low risk since it doesn't do to keep a strong wizard like him entirely out of the field. Even if Voldemort and co. don't know about his dog disguise, there are other methods to conceal his identity or presence (Polyjuice potions, human transfiguration, an invisibility cloak...).
  Instead: They more or less aggravate Sirius for being useless (which is greatly their fault anyway), giving him a huge chip on his shoulder, so when the moment comes for them to fight and Harry is in danger, he rushes in.
  As A Result: Out of lack of preparation in the field, he oversteps himself and falls in battle, with the Order losing one of their best wizards.
• At the start of each Occlumency lesson, Snape places certain memories in a Pensieve, so that if Harry attempts to defend himself against Snape's Legilimency (or if Voldemort picks that moment to enter Harry's mind and use Legilimency on Snape), those memories won't be available. Harry knows Snape is spying on Voldemort for Dumbledore, and at this point in the series seems to agree with Dumbledore's trust of Snape.
  You'd Expect: Harry to not look in the Pensieve. It's an easily-avoidable breach of privacy in itself, but the idiocy comes in when you realise a) Harry knows Snape is spying on Voldemort; b) Voldemort is a powerful Legilimens; c) the whole point of these lessons is that he needs to stop Voldemort entering his mind; and d) he hasn't been practicing like Snape told him, because he really wants to know the secret Voldemort is telepathically dangling in front of him. All this means that anything Harry sees, Voldemort might see, and Harry even considers that Snape might be hiding important secrets of the Order of the Phoenix in the Pensieve. Even without entering strategic ground, Harry should also consider that Snape might realize (either by catching Harry using the Pensieve or by reading those memories on Harry's head) and could become seriously angry at him for peeking at memories Snape specifically wanted Harry not to see. Again, ethics and practicality are at one in this: Harry should not look in the Pensieve.
  Instead: Harry looks in the Pensieve. Specifically hoping he'll find information on the thing the Order is trying to keep safe from Voldemort. Fortunately, Voldemort isn't looking through Harry's eyes at the time, and Harry randomly gets a memory of one of the things Snape regrets the most.
  As A Result: When Snape comes back from dealing with a student-related emergency and finds Harry with his face in such a personal memory, he's understandably furious, throws Harry out, and ends the lessons.
  You Also Expect: Snape, knowing that Harry's not engaging in Occlumency lessons, and that he has a history for being nosy and being overly curious, would not ostentatiously pour his memories in the Pensieve in front of Harry (showing him that he's hiding something), or alternatively put the memories in a phial like how Dumbledore collects memories and keep it under his bed or in a pocket inside his cloak. This is in keeping with both his opinion of Harry's character and likewise representative of his own position as a spy and Potions expert, and his secretive nature.
  Instead: He pours memories in the Pensieve in front of Harry, leaves the room with the Pensieve container open with all his memories still floating inside. This after taunting Harry by lording over his knowledge and position in the Order, interspersed with insults to him and his family, which naturally is only going to make Harry respect him and his privacy and position even less than before.

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