The Griddler
A character that few seem to remember, little mentioned, and absolutely no pictures or videos anywhere on the internet. It's possible that the character never even existed, and that someone just made him up. Ripe for a few WMGs...
McDonald's removed almost all traces of the Griddler for fear of a lawsuit from DC Comics
The Griddler was so similar to the Riddler that DC complained. DC is one of the few companies big enough to spook McDonald's, so they removed the ads and thoroughly removed almost all traces of the character.The Griddler committed a Thoughtcrime.
He is now an Un-person. There never was such a person as the Griddler. Oceania has always been at war with Eastasia. 2+2=5.While doing a magic trick, Ronald accidentally made the Griddler disappear and couldn't bring him back.
In his guilt, he purged almost all memory and records of him in the hopes that people would forget all about it.The Griddler is a Deleted Role
He was intended to exist, far enough for the character to be written into scripts or even a costume made, but for whatever reason the marketing firm or MacDonald's scrapped him. Relations with Burger King
Ronald and the King are Brothers
However, they had a falling out, possibly concerning who was going to inherit their father's secret hamburger recipes. They argued, disowned each other, and went their separate ways, and each started their own burger chain. The reason the King wears the mask is because his face resembles Ronald's, which he can't stand.Ronald used to be the King's court jester
He would entertain the king and court with his magic tricks. However, when the king learned magic himself, Ronald was out of a job. So he struck out on his own and ended up in McDonaldland.The King is Ronald McDonald from a dystopian future
In the future, as the world gets more P.C., fast food restaurants continually get blamed for the fattening of America. McDonald's, desperate to cleanse themselves of this image, completely revamp themselves, the board turns on Ronald McDonald in their anger, and ousts him from the company. But Ronald knows all the corporate secrets, so the restaurant's shareholders hire assassins to eliminate the clown, as well as the citizens of McDonaldland. Grimace, the Hamburglar, Mayor McCheese, and most of the rest are killed in the ensuing holocaust. Although Ronald (and close ally Birdie) survives the assassination attempt, the experience leaves him severely scarred, both physically and mentally. He decides to create a new restaurant, one where he can be in charge again. He travels into the past and adopt a crude disguise of a plastic king mask, and begins to form his own franchise to counter his former restaurant, thus fulfilling the ancient Sumerian prophecy (circa 1950 BC) that "When a clown falls, a king shall rise." Birdie gets extensive plastic surgery, dyes her pigtails red and renames herself "Wendy", but that's another story...- In addition, Moon Man is Mac Tonight from the same dystopian future. He too survived, but unscathed. He decided to travel into the past as well, but then decided to take on the alter-ego of a white supremacist rapper wearing a Mac Tonight costume to hide his identity and discourage other time-travellers sent by McDonald's from capturing him and taking him back to the future. And the rest is history.
Ronald was one of The King's slaves.
As a child, Ronald was enslaved in a hamburger mine by the Marvelous Magical Burger King, who ruled a Crapsaccharine World many fast-food mascots came from. He eventually led a slave rebellion and escaped after learning magic, and he left with his friends to McDonaldland. The Hamburgular was a spy sent by the King, but forgot his duty after a while. Other
All burgers in McDonaldland go through several different stages in life.
They originally grow in hamburger patches, starting as regular, not-alive hamburgers. Some simply fall off, they are eaten by characters like Ronald. The ones who don't fall off grow eyes, a mouth, and brains. Eventually, these ones grow stumpy little arms and legs, and they fall off now that they are able to walk and survive on their own. Their legs grow, their arms grow, and eventually a full body forms, with the burger functioning as the head. This is how burger-people like Mayor McCheese and Officer Big Mac come to be, and explains the discrepancies between them and the burgers in the hamburger patch.Ronald had a deprived childhood
He was often neglected and nearly starved. This is why making children happy, particularly by giving them food, is his life's work.- Dude, that's the explanation we needed to make people think differently about one of the most controversial advertising icons in the world!
Ronald is a pedophile.
It's obvious for several reasons. First off, he's a clown (and a creepy one in fact). He could team up with Pennywise any day. Second, he encourages kids to eat unhealthy food. Certainly another reason for him not to be trusted. And he's frequently seen with kids with no adult supervision. Are the parents even aware of what their children are doing? Parents, you better watch out for what could become of your kids. Also, there are quite a few commercials that suggest he's really not as kind as he wants us to believe (like the Captain Crook commercial, for example). Clearly, this clown is up to no good.