History Recap / GleeS6E04TheHurtLockerPartOne

* StrawmanHasAPoint: Much of Sue's TheReasonYouSuckSpeech to Will. But most especially raising the issue of the way he has always neglected the band, which in terms of sheer number of members dwarfs the glee club and which she did ''not'' in fact eliminate along with the rest of the Arts (much like she kept the Cheerios). Indeed, a bit of a BrokenAesop this season is that the glee club, which has historically been a ''very'' small group of students, is treated as being more important than other student activities that actually have more students participating in them!

* TakeThatUs: Sue reminds the glee club that they need 12 members to compete, calling it the only rule that any remembers or cares about, but always forget until right before the show. ([[NoFourthWall Who writes this!?]])

Next Time: Part 2 of our case study on altered states, featuring two cases of ForegoneConclusion, a former couple trapped in an elevator, and Rachel having LesYay with someone ''not'' Quinn Fabray. Plus, [[{{Film/Saw}} Jigsue]]. Madness.

* ActingForTwo: Iqbal Theba plays both Figgins and Figgins' sister.
* ActorInspiredElement: Iqbal Theba wanted "Principal" to be Figgins' first name, and this episode makes it canon.

* TakeThatAudience: Sue is made out to be a stereotypical obsessive Klaine shipper, and the creepiness is likely meant to attack the real life ones. Also AudienceSurrogate and FandomNod.

...madness. That is the only word to describe these two episodes; yes, two. I'm scared too.

After we hear Ian for the first time in this final season, we start in the lounge, where the Tyrannical Tracksuit sits opposite her former foe in a supposed attempt to bury the hatchet. Preferably in Will's head. Will goes on about his son, particularly how he sings him the BootstrappedTheme to put him down for the night because of course. However, as Sue V/O's about how Will still has the emotional depth of a preteen, said preteen scurries off. And leaves behind a plastic fork. Since Sue never needs a reason for her own madness, said fork is now Sue's rage fork, and is the final straw (or fork) in that makes her want to seek revenge on Will Schuester. We then cut to a storage unit, or Sue's TitleDrop. See she's thinking of retiring but has goals to complete first...

We then get scarred for life.

There are puppets of current and former New Directions members, Rachel's hair, other creepy things - and now the rage fork. Rachel's hair is also a recent addition, because Sue found the extensions left around and now wants to destroy Will (hasn't she always?) and break Rachel's heart. We're pretty sure the latter happened already, but maybe Sue's thinking of being super effective and using Quinn. Now that we're not certain if Sue hasn't been manipulating the sexualities of the Unholy Trinity, because those are some weird pictures. She the gets Becky to wait outside in her Le Car before playing a note on a mini keyboard, opening a secret entrance. And, in the most blatant TakeThat Glee ever pulled... we find a shrine to Klaine. It's disturbing, and by proxy so are the Klaine fans. Are the creators punishing us for liking Quinn after spending three years making Dianna regret signing the contract?! There, I said it! Screw you, Murphyyyyyyyy!!!!

Ahem.

Nonetheless, the truth has set us free, as after six years we finally know once and for all. Sue's a nutjob. She also wants to be flower-girl at Klaine's wedding while we hit the TitleCard and crave a shower.

The nutjob's den. Sue has summoned Porcelain to let her help him get Blaine back, but he offends her by saying he's moved on. How dare he. Sue then swaps tact's and announces an Invitational she's holding, which she didn't tell them about. It's Hummelberry vs. Blaine vs. Will (because nobody cares about the kids) in an attempt to destroy Rachel. When she realizes that Kurt heard, in account of sitting right in front of her, she adds that it was supposed to be in voiceover. The crumbling Fourth Wall collapses just a little bit more as we cut to the auditorium where we find Will and Vocal Adrenaline. Will's melancholy as Rachel approaches; the two having a heart-to-heart (half of this season is made of these) and when they notice the astonishment shown by the new new New Direction kids at seeing Vocal Adrenaline for the first time they refer back to the Pilot when the first six kids went to see VA. Will wonders how none of them quit on the spot, and Rachel says that they were committed, and still are, but her kids aren't there yet. Will takes this to mean that she wants him to throw the competition so that they kids will get on board fully. Rachel says that she knows he's with VA, but should want to help protect his original glee club from dying. Will says he'd do anything for her, but since madness is undiluted and exposed we of course see a drone fly in. We then see the rest of the conversation through the camera lens, Sue behind the drone, as they talk about expectations and then Will asks how she thinks they're going to Sectionals with four kids. She says she needs time, but will lose these kids if they don't do well, and begs for Will's help because of how much the glee club helped him. Will's not moved, but then looks at Finn and Lillian's plaques. This means he's changed his mind, duh, so that exhaustive conversation we tried to summarize in short was pointless. Will's idea to get VA to be bad is to have them come up with a new routine just hours before they perform. He says he knows that it's ridiculous - FINALLY! He finally realized! - but if they want to be performers then they need {{improv}} skills. Remember when "make up a new routine hours before the show" was his MO? Oh, those good old days. There is of course objections, namely from one VA member in particular. His name is Clint, played by Max George of the now-defunct group The Wanted. As always, Vocal Adrenaline focuses itself on one performer specifically. Will prefers team tactics, so from the jump they aren't gelling well. Clint is so aghast he doesn't notice Sue's drone, which flies down the hall back to Sue, attacking students. It looks angry, and Sue calls it a dragon. Its [[Series/GameOfThrones Khalessi]] loves it.

Now that Sue has intel, it's time for Phase 1: Breaking Rachel's heart. You may ask if they kept Creator/DiannaAgron for another episode? Sadly, no, but she has a backup as we cut to her in the locker room where we find Sam; as it turns out, he's very susceptible to suggestion, thus allowing Sue to perfect her hypnotizing skills on the boy. Trouty Mouth is such an airhead he's easy to hypnotist and Sue tells him that whenever he hears the words "piano", "flat-bed truck", and "let's do a song", he'll fall madly in love with Rachel Berry. Two, I understand, but where did the truck come from? The only flat-bed truck on Glee is the one that nearly paralysed Quinn a few seasons back. What a weird choice... Oh, come on, so Sue ships Faberry, too?! Sam must also kiss Rachel and then promptly forget everything. She wakes him up, and he thinks she only just came in. Sue walks out, completely baffled at how easy that was and all the problems with the boy. It's at this point that we must say this isn't too outlandish a plan if you remember [[Recap/GleeS5E6MovinOut a certain interaction]] the two had last season. Cut to Blaine arriving with the Warblers, talking seriously to Kurt and Rachel. He's very professional, like an adult, and taking the Invitationals seriously. They wonder why he is, even though Rachel has already mentioned how serious her kids think it is, and how serious the original New Directions all took their first invitationals. Blaine says that New Directions might not do so well, and Kurt asks him to take it easy on them. Blaine says no. Then he gets a text from Karofsky that leads us to the Blaineofsky appartment. Klainechel arrive, wondering what Dave was worried about when A WILD MAN IN QUESTION APPEARS! He's scared and sends the three to investigate the bedroom, and there's a bear on the bed. AN ACTUAL BEAR. Sue released a wild bear into their apartment! How do you even get bears in Lima? What the fuck is Karofsky's job? Is he in college? So. Many. Questions. It's a good thing we're really fucking entertained, tonight, Glee, but you're not getting away with it next week (sadly yes, you are, we saw "Part One" in the title). And now... okay, we can't even call MoodWhiplash because the moods are already whiplashing.

Samchel... nope, that's weird, wrong and obscene... are eating together in Breadstix, because they're not low on money or anything but can't cook and have to eat out every night. Slightly above awkward conversation ensues, in which we find Rachel still readjusting to life in Lima. Sam agrees, saying it's easy to fall back into old habits. He asks what Rachel does in her free time, and she reveals that in her free time she watches Creator/PattiLuPone, besides crying. She shrugs. Wait, Lupone? She's understandably still melancholy but now watching Broadway related things to cope? She's - she's Rachel again! Thank you, RIB, thank you, Lillian Adler, hell, thank you Finn, thank you! Now we just need Quinn. Returning to what Glee will realistically provide, Sam says that ''he'' blows up glass. Yeh. Rachel is genuinely interested and tries to start a conversation, but Sam proves what terrible boyfriend material he is by cutting her off and saying they need to be proactive at improving glee club. Maybe you could not be having a long meal, and instead work on it? Rachel mentions learning to play the piano, and Sam's spinning hypno brain kicks in. Because he's now in love with Rachel (yes this was slightly foreshadowed, but for the sake of sanity just go with it) he'll get someone to teach them, and Rachel thinks it sweet but feels she best remind Sam that this meal of theirs isn't a date. Sam agrees, but looks sad. Well, as sad as those lips will let him look. Rachel also looks sad. There is relevance here, and we'll explore it later as we ''finally'' go to break.

We return to Sue's office, where Kurt asks what she was thinking by putting a bear in Dave and Blaine's bed. Sue says she thought Karofsky was attracted to bears. FacePalm. She wasn't trying to kill him, apparently, but to get him to replace Blaine with ''a bear''. He calls her insane, and now it's time for a funny Sue OneLiner! We do enjoy these. Now that she's principal, she has expanded the boundary of what isn't insane. So she has the Collins Dictionary on speed dial, big whoop, doesn't everyone. She is not insane - [[Recap/GleeS3E10YesNo Will proposing to Emma from a floating platform in a school pool she never knew they had before]], that's insane. Yes it is. Kurt tells Sue to stop whatever she's up to, and that he has a new boyfriend. GASP! He's got an old man name, and yes, as we soon find out later, he's an old man. Repeat after me, everyone, this episode's new mantra: *clears throat* ''Just go with it.'' After saying the DisposableLoveInterest (because we ''all'' know where all of this is leading to) is a cannibal and that Sue would eat Kurt if she had to, nice looking out, Kurt leaves as Sue plots and we cut to Blaine teaching Trouty and Rachel how to play piano (we're sure Rachel could already play piano). The two were gonna ask Brad, in his first appearance in this final season, but then Sam caught Brad looking at [[IKissYourFoot weird porn kink]]. Yes, that is actually mentioned, Brad Ellis, you poor poor bastard. And by the way, have you noticed there's no songs yet? Madness. Rachel now says she did play piano, but quit at four, Blaine saying that's so unlike her. Ouch, dirty pool Anderson. Sue comes down on a crane into the room, because it doesn't have a ceiling. The fourth wall is being taken out to a firing squad. She makes with the usual taunts, before triggering Sam to kick Blaine out. Then Sue takes the fire extinguisher as she leaves the auditorium and sprays the kids in the hall with it as we FINALLY cue a song, specifically the one song that describes Sue Sylvester to a fucking t. She pops up in weird places and licks Rachel's lunch before ending in her office, nameplate now reading "BITCH". Creator/JaneLynch needs an award for getting through this episode.

Afterwards, we cut to Blainofsky date night at Breadstix (is there literally nowhere else in this town? [No, no there's not.]). We do get some slight pathos here, as Karofsky tells Blaine about how he's changed so much as a person. Blaine agrees, but before we get more of this rather subdued scene, it's interrupted when every man in the restaurant recognizes and says hi to Karofsky. Sue invited all of his exes (well done Dave), she informs them, and adds that she took their personal items ({{Squick}}) and ran a DNA test that shows they are distant cousins, so now whenever they do it, they'll know they're having sex with a family member. Yes, she says this. Murphy is apparently trying for a bingo on the "we've got nothing left to lose" card. This is all of course BlatantLies designed to drive Blaine away; from here we cut to the choir room where we find Rachel off-key at the piano. Sam arrives as she vents, and okay this is all clearly designed to let the two have a "cute" moment. He's not Quinn, it's not cute. What we get here is Sam trying to be all wise and shit, babbling on about Music/RayCharles and Music/StevieWonder and how the greats didn't have to see to play. Okay Trouts, if that meant Rachel didn't have to see you, you're on to something. Cut to Carmel; yes there's more to it than their auditorium, even if it's repainted [=McKinley=] sets. We find Sue there to see Principal Gunderson. When the chair turns, we see Figgins... Oh, god, why? [=WHY=]!? Dressed as a woman. Fuck, is - what is this? Is he trans or a CrossDresser or what!? Wait, that's Figgins' sister. Oh-kay then. Gunderson asks why Sue's there, and Sue brings up the footage of Will being traitorous and says he needs to be spoken to.

We return from break to [=McKinley=], where Kurt and Rachel try to convince what they have of a glee club that they'll be fine as they are, which, as they are but four at the moment, no one buys. Rachel tries to demonstrate her piano skills, but since she was distracted by a walking mouth hole, they're still dubious. The newbies get payed to speak this week as Roderick declares "we're screwed" - ''well you are with that attitude'', Kurt practically says back. Remember how Chris is still the youngest? It's a little obvious occasionally. Cut to Sue's office where Will arrives to tell her not to mess in adult affairs because his job is SeriousBusiness, just like [[Recap/GleeS3E12TheSpanishTeacher the stupid rant he gave Santana when she was justified]]. We're laughing right now. Sue brings up the rage fork when Will adds he thought they were friends. He thinks that she's petty and insane. Sue's revenge, as she now reveals, including putting the bubonic plague virus into his food, and that she replaced his hair product with her urine. She then proceeds to ''light him up'' by calling out every dubious thing he's done over the series. She says he gives teaching a bad name - how has he won so many Teacher of the Year awards? How? Why does he adore some students but neglects others - like Joe, Rory, and Matt, and where are they? - as well as the most important part of the glee club - THE BAND, and how do they always know what everyone wants them to play and how to play it? - he's also creepy around the students he does adore - the ''[[ShowerScene showers]]'', William!? - and is turned on by them nearly as much as he is by giving pep talks. He also looks like he's constantly holding in a fart and ruins every single ''Music/{{Journey}}'' song. Oh, them's fighting words as Will is now enraged and thus twice as determined into making sure that glee club will be more permanent at [=McKinley=] than Sue. Of course, since this is the final season and spoilers are pretty much redundant, we'll say that it'll take us a while to find out that this was her plan all along.

After the break, we're back in the auditorium where Kurt has a problem: the auditorium chairs have gum under them. Figgins says not to blame him, but parents. We're pretty sure that this is the outlook he had as Principal, too. Blaine comes in looking for Sam and Rachel and Figgins says they were sharing a pretzel. [[SarcasmMode Clearly love is in the air]]. He leaves, and Kurt tells Blaine that he is not related to Dave. The platonic conversation is going great until Kurt says that he's met someone new, and then Blaine awkwardly gets up and leaves. They're being written as if they're lusting after each other, when they don't care. Come on, writers. Oh, wait, I forgot: Just go with it. Cut to Sam finding Rachel playing piano, because she magically got amazing, and then we cue up a ShotForShotRemake of Vanessa Carlton's SignatureSong, complete with them on a flatbed... piano... song... wait, this was a ''BrickJoke''? FacePalm. Afterwards... he swallows her. VomitDiscretionShot. Sorry, it was revolting when it was Brittany and it's not exactly sexy here either! Especially when you realize that was the result of a GeniusBonus: Sue said that Sam would want to kiss Rachel when any of the three phrases came up. None of them are said, but the ImagineSpot music video they just did ''used a flat bed truck'' to make it seem like the piano was moving down the road.

After the break, we find Sam back to his definition of "normal", as Rachel approaches. She tries the "it never happened" approach, one we most assuredly agree with, but as Sam's snapped out of Sue's whammy, he takes her literally. However, as it turns out, Rachel believes that kiss was him showing affection the way costars would. Or something, my brains are slowly turning into the contents of a Big Quench. Point is, she asks him out, but as you'd expect, he refuses, because as he doesn't remember his actions when whammied, from his view, Rachel's just acting kinda weird and he still has a thing for Mercedes. Yes. Rachel leaves slightly confused, same as the rest of us, when we see the Polyester Parasite literally slide behind her. Back to the locker room where Sue again whammies him and gets him to steal Will's mail because petty. Back to Breadstix where we meet Kurt's temporary boyfriend ([[Series/LALaw Harry Hamlin is that you?]]), who is older than Burt and only just came out so has kids Kurt's age. Kurt thinks maybe he should try dating people his own age, and we think he's about to try and hook him up with one of Rachel's dads when Kurt gives old boyfriend a chance because he likes him, but they should start as friends. Cut to Will arriving at his VA-purchased condo, when we see Sam is really bad at working out how to steal mail; Will confronts him and he claims that Rachel sent him because she blames Will for her nose getting broken, "Run Joey Run", and her show failing. Will's shocked, and tells Sam to leave - Sam agrees that he was told to come at night. Give credit to Sue, she's well prepared, and Will is well stupid.

We start the first home stretch of this two-part (AHHHHHHHHHHH!) madness in the auditorium, where VA are up first. No, Will, a show circle is not the VA way, but what is an overtly elaborate performance, and since Will thinks ND was trying to sabotage him (by stealing his mail, Will you're an idiot...) they're pulled out all the stops, namely, some B-52's followed by some Devo, complete with Devo hats. Yes. Sue's introduction is an impression of Effie in ''Film/TheHungerGames'', possibly another Film/PitchPerfect reference, and the episode closes on Rachel's stunned face when VA do good (you have to go over the performance a few times, they start out barely decent but get better the more you watch it) and Will smirks at her.

Samchel... nope, that's weird, wrong and obscene... are eating together in Breadstix, because they're not low on money or anything but can't cook and have to eat out every night. Slightly above awkward conversation ensues, in which we find Rachel still readjusting to life in Lima. Sam agrees, saying it's easy to fall back into old habits. He asks what Rachel does in her free time, and she reveals that in her free time she watches Creator/PattiLuPone, besides crying. She shrugs. Wait, Lupone? She's understandably still melancholy but now watching Broadway related things to cope? She's - she's Rachel again! Thank you, RIB, thank you, Lillian Adler, hell, thank you Finnegan, thank you! Now we just need Quinn. Returning to what Glee will realistically provide, Sam says that ''he'' blows up glass. Yeh. Rachel is genuinely interested and tries to start a conversation, but Sam proves what terrible boyfriend material he is by cutting her off and saying they need to be proactive at improving glee club. Maybe you could not be having a long meal, and instead work on it? Rachel mentions learning to play the piano, and Sam's spinning hypno brain kicks in. Because he's now in love with Rachel (yes this was slightly foreshadowed, but for the sake of sanity just go with it) he'll get someone to teach them, and Rachel thinks it sweet but feels she best remind Sam that this meal of theirs isn't a date. Sam agrees, but looks sad. Well, as sad as those lips will let him look. Rachel also looks sad. There is relevance here, and we'll explore it later as we ''finally'' go to break.

Next Time: Part 2 of our case study on altered states, featuring two cases of ForegoneConclusion, a former couple trapped in an elevator, and Rachel having LesYay with someone ''not'' Lucille Fabray. Plus, [[{{Film/Saw}} Jigsue]]. Madness.

** A ticket to ''Theatre/FunnyGirl'', suggesting that she saw Rachel and/or Santana perform on Broadway.

** A program from Kurt's nursing home production of ''Theatre/PeterPan''.

...so. Yeah.

Sue and Will talk about how everything has changed. Will doesn't work at [=McKinley=] any more, though, and has to hurry off. He leaves behind a plastic fork. This is now Sue's rage fork, and is the final straw (or fork) in that makes her want to seek revenge on Will Schuester. Sue then takes Becky to her hurt locker, because she's thinking of retiring but has goals first.

There are puppets of current and former New Directions members, Rachel's hair, other creepy things - and now the rage fork. Rachel's hair is also a recent addition, because Sue found the extensions left around and now wants to destroy Will (hasn't she always?) and break Rachel's heart. We're pretty sure the latter happened already, but maybe Sue's thinking of being super effective and using Quinn. Now that we're not certain if Sue hasn't been manipulating the sexualities of the Unholy Trinity, because those are some weird pictures. She gets Becky to wait outside in her Le Car and then plays a note on a mini keyboard, opening a secret entrance. Behind this lies a shrine to Klaine. It's disturbing. Are the creators punishing us for liking Quinn after spending three years making Dianna regret signing the contract?! There, I said it! Screw you, Murphyyyyyyyy!!!!

And the truth has set us free. Sue's a nutjob. She also wants to be flower-girl at Klaine's wedding.

In Sue's office, she tries to convince Porcelain to let her help him get Blaine back, but he offends her. Then she says it's for the Invitationals she's holding, which she didn't tell them about. It's Hummelberry vs. Blaine vs. Will (because nobody cares about the kids - but that would be Kitty vs. Skylar vs. Clint). When she realises that Kurt heard, she adds that it was supposed to be in voiceover. The crumbling Fourth Wall collapses just a little bit more.

In the auditorium, now informed, Rachel has a heart-to-heart with Will (half of this season is made of these) and when they notice the astonishment shown by the new new New Direction kids at seeing Vocal Adrenaline for the first time they refer back to the Pilot when the first six kids went to see VA. Will wonders how none of them quit on the spot, and Rachel says that they were committed, and still are, but her kids aren't there yet. Will takes this to mean that she wants him to throw the competition so that they kids will get on board fully. A flying camera appears. Rachel says that she knows he's with VA, but should want to help protect his original glee club from dying. Will says he'd do anything for her. We see the rest of the conversation through the camera lens, Sue behind the drone, as they talk about expectations and then Will asks how she thinks they're going to Sectionals with four kids. She says she needs time, but will lose these kids if they don't do well, and begs for Will's help because of how much the glee club helped him. Will's not moved, but then looks at Finn and Lillian's plaques. This means he's changed his mind, duh, so that exhaustive conversation we tried to summarise in short was pointless.

Will's idea to get VA to be bad is to have them come up with a new routine just hours before they perform. He says he knows that it's ridiculous - FINALLY! He finally realized! - but if they want to be performers then they need {{improv}} skills. Remember when "make up a new routine hours before the show" was his MO? Oh, those good old days. The drone followed him, but now flies down the hall back to Sue, attacking students. It looks angry, and Sue calls it a dragon.

Now onto breaking Rachel's heart: you've kept DiannaAgron for another episode? Sadly, no, but Sue *did* perfect her hypnotising skills on the girl and now uses them on her male double, Sam. He's such an airhead he's easy to hypnotise and Sue tells him that whenever he hears the words "piano", "flat-bed truck", and "let's do a song", he'll fall madly in love with Rachel Berry. Two, I understand, but where did the truck come from? The only flat-bed truck on Glee is the one that nearly paralysed Quinn a few seasons back. What a weird choice... Oh, come on, so Sue ships Faberry, too?! ([[Recap/GleeS6E08AWedding Yes, yes she does.]]) Sam must also kiss Rachel and then promptly forget everything. She waked him up, and he thinks she only just came in. Sue walks out, completely baffled at how easy that was and all the problems with the boy.

Blaine has arrived with the Warblers, and begins talking seriously to Kurt and Rachel. He's very professional, like an adult, and taking the Invitationals seriously. They wonder why he is, even though Rachel has already mentioned how serious her kids think it is, and how serious the original New Directions all took their first invitationals. Blaine says that New Directions might not do so well, and Kurt asks him to take it easy on them. Blaine says no. Then he gets a text.

Klainechel arrive at Blaine's new apartment, wondering what Dave was worried about when A WILD MAN IN QUESTION APPEARS! He's scared and sends the three to investigate the bedroom, and there's a bear on the bed. AN ACTUAL BEAR. Sue released a wild bear into their apartment! How do you even get bears in Lima? What the fuck is Karofsky's job? Is he in college? So. Many. Questions. It's a good thing we're really fucking entertained, tonight, Glee, but you're not getting away with it next week (yes, you are, we saw "Part One" in the title).

Samchel - nope, that's weird, they can't get together, that would be wrong and obscene - are eating together in Breadstix, because they're not low on money or anything but can't cook and have to eat out every night. Rachel reveals that in her free time she watches Creator/PattiLuPone, besides crying. She shrugs. She's - she's Rachel again! Thank you, RIB, thank you, Lillian Adler, hell, thank you Finnegan, thank you! Now we just need Quinn. Returning to what Glee will realistically provide, Sam says that ''he'' blows up glass. Yeh. Rachel is genuinely interested and tries to start a conversation, but Sam proves what terrible boyfriend material he is by cutting her off and saying they need to be proactive at improving glee club. Maybe you could not be having a long meal, and instead work on it? Rachel mentions learning to play the piano, and Sam's spinning hypno brain comes back. Because he's now in love with Rachel (for the sake of sanity, just go with it) he'll get someone to teach them, and Rachel thinks it sweet but feels she best remind Sam that this meal of theirs isn't a date. Sam agrees, but looks sad. Well, as sad as those lips will let him look. Rachel also looks sad.

Kurt asks Sue what she was thinking by putting a bear in Dave and Blaine's bed. Sue says she thought Karofsky was attracted to bears. FacePalm. She wasn't trying to kill him, apparently, but to get him to replace Blaine with ''a bear''. He calls her insane, and now it's time for a funny Sue OneLiner! (We do enjoy these). Now that she's principal, she has expanded the boundary of what isn't insane. So she has the Collins Dictionary on speed dial, big whoop, doesn't everyone. She is not insane - Will proposing to Emma from a floating platform in a school pool she never knew they had before, that's insane. Yes it is. Kurt tells Sue to stop whatever she's up to, and that he has a new boyfriend. He's got an old man name, and we soon find out that he's an old man. Repeat after me, everyone, this episode's new mantra: *clears throat* ''Just go with it.''

Blaine is teaching the guys how to play piano (we're sure Rachel could already play piano), because Sam caught Brad looking at [[IKissYourFoot weird porn kink]]. Yes, that is actually mentioned, Brad Ellis, you poor bastard. Note, there hasn't been a proper song performance yet. Rachel now says she did play piano, but forgot how. JGWI. Sue comes down on a crane into the room, because it doesn't have a ceiling. Basically, the lesson ends, and then Sue takes the fire extinguisher as she leaves the auditorium and sprays the kids in the hall with it, singing the one song that describes her to a fucking t. She pops up in weird places and licks Rachel's lunch before ending in her office, nameplate now reading "BITCH". Creator/JaneLynch needs an award for getting through this episode.

Blainofsky date night at Breadstix (is there literally nowhere else in this town? [No, no there's not.]) is interrupted when every man in the restaurant recognises and says hi to Karofsky. Sue invited all of his exes, she informs them, and adds that she took their personal items (squick) and ran a DNA test that shows they are distant cousins, so now whenever they do it, they'll know they're having sex with a family member. Yes, she says this. Murphys apparently trying for a bingo on the "we've got nothing left to lose" card.

Rachel and Sam have a "cute" moment. He's not Quinn, it's not cute.

Sue goes to Carmel, and starts to talk to Principal Gunderson. When the chair turns, we see Figgins... Oh, god, why? [=WHY=]!? Dressed as a woman. Fuck, is - what is this? Is he trans or a CrossDresser or what!? Wait, that's Figgins' sister. Oh-kay then. Gunderson asks why Sue's there, and Sue brings up the footage of Will and says he needs to be spoken to. Back at [=McKinley=], Kurt and Rachel try to convince what they have of a glee club that they'll be fine as they are, which no one buys. Roderick actually says "we're screwed" - ''well you are with that attitude'', Kurt practically says back. Remember how Chris is still the youngest? It's a little obvious occasionally.

Will comes to Sue's office, telling her not to mess in adult affairs because his job is SeriousBusiness, just like the stupid rant he gave Santana when she was justified. We're laughing right now. Sue brings up the rage fork when Will adds he thought they were friends. He thinks that she's petty and insane. Sue's revenge, as she now reveals, including putting the bubonic plague virus into his food, and that she replaced his hair product with her urine. She then adds how he gives teaching a bad name - how has he won so many Teacher of the Year awards? How? Why does he adore some students but neglects others - like Joe, Rory, and Matt, and where are they? - as well as the most important part of the glee club - THE BAND, and how do they always know what everyone wants them to play and how to play it? - he's also creepy around the students he does adore - the ''[[ShowerScene showers]]'', William!? - and is turned on by them nearly as much as he is by giving pep talks. He also looks like he's constantly holding in a fart and ruins every single ''Music/{{Journey}}'' song.

Oh, them's fighting words.

Will is now enraged into making sure that glee club will be more permanent at [=McKinley=] than Sue, and it takes a while for us to find out that this was her plan all along.

Kurt also has a problem: the auditorium chairs have gum under them. Figgins says not to blame him, but parents. We're pretty sure that this is the outlook he had as Principal, too. Blaine comes in, Figgins leaves, and Kurt tells Blaine that he is not related to Dave. It's going great until Kurt says that he's met someone new, and then Blaine awkwardly gets up and leaves. They're being written as if they're lusting after each other, when they don't care. Come on, writers. Oh, wait, I forgot: Just go with it.

Sam finds Rachel playing piano, because she magically got amazing, and they do a duet. Then they kiss. This is a GeniusBonus: Sue said that Sam would want to kiss Rachel when any of the three phrases came up. None of them are said, but the ImagineSpot music video they just did ''used a flat bed truck'' to make it seem like the piano was moving down the road. Sue then proceeds to stalk them, and it's weird. She hypnotises Sam again, and now gets him to steal Will's mail.

Then we meet Kurt's old boyfriend, who is older than Burt and only just came out so has kids Kurt's age. Kurt thinks maybe he should try dating people his own age, and we think he's about to try and hook him up with one of Rachel's dads when Kurt gives old boyfriend a chance because he likes him, but they should start as friends. In other places, Sam is really bad at working out how to steal mail and when Will confronts him, he claims that Rachel sent him because she blames Will for her nose getting broken, "Run Joey Run", and her show failing. Will's shocked, and tells Sam to leave - Sam agrees that he was told to come at night.

Back in the auditorium, VA are up first and because of Will thinking that ND were trying to sabotage him (by stealing his mail...) they're pulled out all the stops. This also gets Clint and co. to really like Will. Sue's introduction is an impression of Effie in ''Film/TheHungerGames'', possibly another Film/PitchPerfect reference, and the episode closes on Rachel's stunned face when VA do good (you have to go over the performance a few times, they start out barely decent but get better the more you watch it) and Will smirks at her.

Holds no relation to film ''Film/TheHurtLocker'' or Santana and Brittany's lockers.

* ''Don't Stop Believin''', performed by Will.

* BreakingTheFourthWall: Sue plays footage of Klaine, including some ImagineSpot and DreamSequence parts, which Becky mentions.

* NoFourthWall.
* RoomFullOfCrazy

* StalkerShrine

** A baby photo, presumably of Beth.

* CharacterDerailment: Sue.

Blainofsky date night at Breadstix (is there literally nowhere else in this town? [No, no there's not.]) is interrupted when every man in the restaurant recognises and says hi to Karofsky. Sue invited all of his exes, she informs them, and adds that she took their personal items (squick) and ran a DNA test that shows they are distant cousins, so now whenever they do it, they'll know they're having sex with a family member. Yes, she says this. Murphys apparently trying for a bingo on the we've got nothing left to lose" card.

Sue goes to Carmel, and starts to talk to Principal Gunderson. When the chair turns, we see Figgins Oh, god, why? [=WHY=]!? Dressed as a woman. Fuck, is - what is this? Is he trans or a CrossDresser or what!? Wait, that's Figgins' sister. Oh-kay then. Gunderson asks why Sue's there, and Sue brings up the footage of Will and says he needs to be spoken to. Back at [=McKinley=], Kurt and Rachel try to convince what they have of a glee club that they'll be fine as they are, which no one buys. Roderick actually says "we're screwed" - ''well you are with that attitude'', Kurt practically says back. Remember how Chris is still the youngest? It's a little obvious occasionally.

Samchel - nope, that's weird, they can't get together, that would be wrong and obscene - are eating together in Breadstix, because they're not low on money or anything but can't cook and have to eat out every night. Rachel reveals that in her free time she watches Creator/PattiLuPone, besides crying. She shrugs. She's - she's Rachel again! Thank you, RIB, thank you, Lillian Adler, hell, thank you Finnegan, thank you! Now we just need Quinn. Returning to what Glee will realistically provide, Sam says that ''he'' blows up glass. Yeh. Rachel is genuinely interested and tries to start a conversation, but Sam proves what terrible boyfriend material he is by cutting her off and saying they need to be proactive at improving glee club. Maybe you could not be having a long meal, and instead work on it? Rachel mentions learning to play the piano, and Sam's spinning hypno brain comes back. Because he's now in love with Rachel (just go with it) he'll get someone to teach them, and Rachel thinks it sweet but feels she best remind Sam that this meal of theirs isn't a date. Sam agrees, but looks sad. Well, as sad as those lips will let him look. Rachel also looks sad.

Kurt asks Sue what she was thinking by putting a bear in Dave and Blaine's bed. Sue says she thought Karofsky was attracted to bears. FacePalm. She wasn't trying to kill him, apparently, but to get him to replace Blaine with ''a bear''. He calls her insane, and now it's time for a funny Sue OneLiner! (We do enjoy these) Now that she's principal, she has expanded the boundary of what isn't insane. So she has the Collins Dictionary on speed dial, big whoop, doesn't everyone. She is not insane - Will proposing to Emma from a floating platform in a school pool she never knew they had before, that's insane. Yes it is. Kurt tells Sue to stop whatever she's up to, and that he has a new boyfriend. He's got an old man name, and we soon find out that he's an old man. Repeat after me, everyone, this episode's new mantra: *clears throat* ''Just go with it.''

Blaine is teaching the guys how to play piano (we're sure Rachel could already play piano), because Sam caught Brad looking at [[IKissYourFoot weird porn kink]]. Yes, that is actually mentioned. Note, there hasn't been a proper song performance yet. Rachel now says she did play piano, but forgot how. JGWI. Sue comes down on a crane into the room, because it doesn't have a ceiling. Basically, the lesson ends, and then Sue takes the fire extinguisher as she leaves the auditorium and sprays the kids in the hall with it, singing. She pops up in weird places and licks Rachel's lunch before ending in her office, nameplate now reading "BITCH". Creator/JaneLynch needs an award for getting through this episode.

Blainofsky date night at Breadstix (is there literally nowhere else in this town?) is interrupted when every man in the restaurant recognises and says hi to Karofsky. Sue invited all of his exes, she informs them, and adds that she took their personal items (squick) and ran a DNA test that shows they are distant cousins, so now whenever they do it, they'll know they're having sex with a family member. Yes, she says this.

Rachel and Sam have a "cute" moment.

Sue goes to Carmel, and starts to talk to Principal Gunderson. When the chair turns, we see Figgins. Oh, god, why? [=WHy=]!? Dressed as a woman. Fuck, is - what is this? Is he trans or a CrossDresser or what!? Wait, that's Figgins' sister. Oh-kay then. Gunderson asks why Sue's there, and Sue brings up the footage of Will and says he needs to be spoken to. Back at [=McKinley=], Kurt and Rachel try to convince what they have of a glee club that they'll be fine as they are, which no one buys. Roderick actually says "we're screwed" - ''well you are with that attitude'', Kurt practically says back. Remember how Chris is still the youngest? It's a little obvious occasionally.

* ''Don't Stop Believin' ''you know who it's by, performed by Will.

* CallBack: Sue's hurt locker contains (amongst other things) a life-size model of Al Roker, specifically labelled as such. In the episode "[[Recap/GleeS4E14IDo I Do]]'', Quinn says that the only man she maybe likes is Al Roker. - What on earth has Sue been doing. {{Squick}}

** A photo of The Unholy Trinity in a compromising position I'm sure we've never seen before...
* {{Hypocrite}}: Sue says that Will has "the emotional depth of a 12-year-old girl". She then is outed as a massive Klaine fan, who are usually accused of being emotionally 12-year-old girls. (The writers have been exploring the internet.)

So.

Sue and Will talk about how everything has changed. Will doesn't work at [=McKinley=] any more, though, and has to hurry off. He leaves behind a plastic fork. This is now Sue's rage fork, and is the final straw (or fork) in that makes her want to reek revenge on Will Schuester. Sue then takes Becky to her hurt locker, because she's thinking of retiring but has goals first.

There are puppets of current and former New Directions members, Rachel's hair, other creepy things - and now the rage fork. Rachel's hair is also a recent addition, because Sue found the extensions left around and now wants to destroy Will (hasn't she always?) and break Rachel's heart. We're pretty sure the latter happened already, but maybe Sue's thinking of being super effective and using Quinn. Now that we're not certain if Sue hasn't been manipulating the sexualities of the Unholy Trinity, because those are some weird pictures. She gets Becky to wait outside in her Le Car and then plays a note on a mini keyboard, opening a secret entrance. Behind this lies a shrine to Klaine. It's disturbing. Are the creators punishing us for liking Quinn? There, I said it! Screw you, Murphyyyyyyyy!!!!

Sue's a nutjob. She also wants to be flower-girl at Klaine's wedding.

In Sue's office, she tries to convince Porcelain to let her help him get Blaine back, but he offends her. Then she says it's for the Invitationals she's holding, which she didn't tell them about. It's Hummelberry vs. Blaine vs. Will (because nobody cares about the kids - but that would be Kitty vs. Skylar vs. Clint). When she realises that Kurt heard, she adds that it was supposed to be in voiceover.

Klainechel arrive at Blaine's new apartment, wondering what Dave was worried about when the man in question appears! He's scared and sends the three to investigate the bedroom, and there's a bear on the bed. A BEAR. Sue released a wild bear into their apartment! How do you even get bears in Lima? What the fuck is Karofsky's job? Is he in college? So. Many. Questions. It's a good thing we're really fucking entertained, tonight, Glee, but you're not getting away with it next week (yeh, you are, we saw "Part One" in the title).

Samchel - nope, that's weird, they can't get together - are eating together in Breadstix, because they're not low on money or anything but can't cook and have to eat out every night. Rachel reveals that in her free time she watches Creator/PattiLuPone, besides crying. She shrugs. She's - she's Rachel again! Thank you, RIB, thank you, Lillian Adler, thank you! Now we just need Quinn. Returning to what Glee will realistically provide, Sam says that ''he'' blows up glass. Yeh. Rachel is genuinely interested and tries to start a conversation, but Sam proves what terrible boyfriend material he is by cutting her off and saying they need to be proactive at improving glee club. Maybe you could not be having a long meal, and instead work on it? Rachel mentions learning to play the piano, and Sam's spinning hypno brain comes back. Because he's now in love with Rachel (just go with it) he'll get someone to teach them, and Rachel thinks it sweet but feels she best remind Sam that this meal of theirs isn't a date. Sam agrees, but looks sad. Well, as sad as those lips will let him look. Rachel also looks sad.

Will comes to Sue's office, telling her not to mess in adult affairs because his job is SeriousBusiness, just like the stupid rant he gave Santana when she was justified. We're laughing right now. Sue brings up the rage fork when Will adds he thought they were friends. He thinks that she's petty and insane. Sue's revenge, as she now reveals, including putting the bubonic plague virus into his food, and that she replaced his hair product with her urine. She then adds how he gives teaching a bad name - how has he won so many Teacher of the Year awards? How? Why does he adore some students but neglects others - like Joe, Rory, and Matt, and where are they? - as well as the most important part of the glee club - THE BAND, and how do they always know what everyone wants them to play and how to play it? - he's also creepy around the students he does adore - the ''showers'', William!? - and is turned on by them nearly as much as he is by giving pep talks. He also looks like he's constantly holding in a fart and ruins every single ''Music/{{Journey}}'' song.

* ''Don't Stop Believin'''' you know who it's by, performed by Will.

[[caption-width-right:350:Yeh, whatever did [[LongBusRide happen to Matt]]?]]

[[caption-width-right:350:Yeh, whatever did happen to Matt?]]

Blaine is teaching the guys how to play piano (we're sure Rachel could already play piano), because Sam caught Brad looking at [[FootFetish weird porn kink]]. Yes, that is actually mentioned. Note, there hasn't been a proper song performance yet. Rachel now says she did play piano, but forgot how. JGWI. Sue comes down on a crane into the room, because it doesn't have a ceiling. Basically, the lesson ends, and then Sue takes the fire extinguisher as she leaves the auditorium and sprays the kids in the hall with it, singing. She pops up in weird places and licks Rachel's lunch before ending in her office, nameplate now reading "BITCH". Creator/JaneLynch needs an award for getting through this episode.

Sue goes to Carmel, and starts to talk to Principal Gunderson. When the chair turns, we see Figgins. Oh, god, why? WHy!? Dressed as a woman. Fuck, is - what is this? Is he trans or a CrossDresser or what!? Wait, that's Figgins' sister. Oh-kay then. Gunderson asks why Sue's there, and Sue brings up the footage of Will and says he needs to be spoken to. Back at [=McKinley=], Kurt and Rachel try to convince what they have of a glee club that they'll be fine as they are, which no one buys. Roderick actually says "we're screwed" - ''well you are with that attitude'', Kurt practically says back. Remember how Chris is still the youngest? It's a little obvious occasionally.

%%WIP

Will comes to Sue's office, telling her not to mess in adult affairs because his job is SeriousBusiness, just like the stupid rant he gave Santana when she was justified. We're laughing right now. Sue brings up the rage fork when Will adds he thought they were friends. He thinks that she's petty and insane. Sue's revenge, as she now reveals, including putting the bubonic plague virus into his food, and that she replaced his hair product with her urine.

Holds no relation to film ''Film/TheHurtLocker'', or Santana and Brittany's lockers.

* FreezeFrameBonus: The wall from Sue's hurt locker, as (part is) shown in the picture above, contains the following (among much more):

Holds no relation to ''Film/TheHurtLocker'' or Santana and Brittany's lockers.

* ''Bitch'' by Music/MeredithBrooks, performed by Sue.

* CallBack: Sue's hurt locker contains (amongst other things) a life-size model of Creator/AlRoker, specifically labelled as such. In the episode "[[Recap/GleeS4E14IDo I Do]]'', Quinn says that the only man she maybe likes is Al Roker. - What on earth has Sue been doing. {{Squick}}

** The picture from [[Recap/GleeS1E9Mattress the 2009 yearbook]] in the middle, with a note pointing to Matt saying "Missing".

** Karofsky articles.