Quotes: Stop, or I Shoot Myself!

"My name is Will Turner! My father was Bootstrap Bill Turner! His blood runs in my veins! On my word, do as I say, or I'll pull this trigger and be lost to Davy Jones' locker!"
William Turner, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl note 

Hondo: The reason we're gathered here on our God-given, much-needed day of rest is that we have a Polish hostage.
Deeks: So what if he's Polish?
Hondo: Naw, it means he's one of those "anybody comes in, I blow my head off" type guys.

Commander: Doctor Bowman. Put the wolf in the security airlock. We'll take it from there.
Doctor Bowman: No can do, Commander Poopy Head. Unauthorized biological. Quarantine is in effect.
Commander: We'll wear isolation suits.
Doctor Bowman: Yes, except that someone stuck a screwdriver through the inner door. You'll trigger lab sterilization procedures. Fuel air mist. Fire. Of course, I'll have rushed in to save my work.
Commander: Doctor, are you holding yourself hostage again?
Doctor Bowman: Well, you can't expect me to hold the puppy hostage. We've barely met and I'm still trying to make a good first impression.