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Quotes: Land Downunder
The second confusing thing about Australia are the animals. They can be divided into three categories: Poisonous, Odd, and Sheep.

"Tegan is one of my favorite companions. When I was a kid, I have to admit, I had a serious crush on her. Between her and Claudia Black, I can tell you French isn't the language of love - it's Aussie."

A sick feeling of repugnance and apprehension grows in me as I near Australia.
— Diary of Sir Robert Menzies, Prime Minister of Australia, May 23, 1941

''We've got Redbacks; Funnelwebs; Blue-ringed octopus; Taipan; Tigersnake; adder; box jelly fish; Stonefish and that poison thing that lives in a shell that spikes you when you pick it up... Come to Australia you might accidentally get killed.
Scared Weird Little Guys - ''Come to Australia''

Like America, Australia has two or three important cities on the opposite coasts and a whole lot of nothing in between. What we call "Flyover Country", they call "The Outback".

If I had to take Hell, I would use the Australians to take it and the New Zealanders to hold it.

I was, in days gone by, a believer. But, alas, I came to this beleaguered land and the God in me just... evaporated. Let us change our toast, then, to the God that has forgotten us [...] Mr. Murphy, Russia, China, the Congo. Oh, I have traveled among unknown people in lands beyond the sea. But nothing, nothing could've prepared me for this godforsaken hole.
Jellon Lamb, The Proposition

Being an Australian, one reaction I often get from non-Australians is amazement that anyone can live in a country so full of deadly wildlife. But really, as long as you knock your shoes out every morning, and don't go poking in holes in the ground, and wear long pants with thick socks and heavy boots, and don't swim north of the Tropic of Capricorn in the wet season, and don't swim at all in the Northern Territory, and keep a forked stick handy, and an antivenine kit, and stay within a 10 minute helicopter flight of a hospital, you're perfectly safe. Most of the time.
— David Morgan-Mar, Irregular Webcomic! #855, The Rant.

Do you come from a land down under
Where women glow and men plunder
Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder
You better run, you better take cover
— Men at Work, "Down Under"

"Have you ever wondered, for example, why every Australian you meet is 20 times happier than you've ever been? I have never met a single Aussie who wasn't the life of the party. And I think I've figured out why. They don't have jobs! They just travel and drink and try to steal your girlfriend."
Bill Maher, Real Time with Bill Maher


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