History Funny / TheIliad

* During the battle between the men and gods, Artemis gets beaten up by Hera with her own bow and literally runs away to her daddy Zeus.

* Early on in the epic, King Priam calls to Helen to explain to him who is leading the Greek army - Agamemnon, Odysseus, Menelaus, etc - because Priam doesn't know who they are. The Greeks have been at war with his kingdom for ''nine years'' before this point. One would imagine who had such a role would be at the forefront of his thoughts.

* Menelaus beating Paris up with his bare hands, [[RatedMForManly while the latter still has his sword]].

* One tangent mentions Hades making a grand entrance only to be immediately shot with one of Heracles' arrows, forcing him to abandon the fight and flee to Olympus to heal. Later, Poseidon makes an earthquake so strong Hades jumps out of his chair in fear that the Underworld will be exposed due to the quake.

* A retroactive one from the Greek orator Gorgias, who published an essay in defense of Helen. Which is rather heartwarming, since Helen was usually blamed for the Trojan war at the time (contributing to Greece's already serious case of sexism). What makes it funny, however, is one of the four reasons Gorgias reasoned that Helen might have joined Paris. In addition to the usual examples (power of love, divine intervention, physical abduction), he suggested that Paris may have used ''rhetoric'', which is so powerful that no mortal may resist it. This brings to mind the image of Paris calmly sitting down and logically explaining to Helen why she should run away with him.

* Menelaus is shot and wounded. Agamemnon immediately begins mourning his brother and gets through a whole speech before Menelaus can get a word in edgewise to explain that he's still alive.

* At one point early in the story Paris steps out among the Trojan soldiers, described as looking like a god, and dares any Greek soldier to come up and face him in battle. Menelaus steps forward to answer the call--and Paris promptly flees back behind his soldiers.
* Menelaus beating Paris up with his bare hands, while the latter still has his sword.

* Early on in the epic, King Priam calls to Helen to explain to him who is leading the Greek army - Agamemnon, Odysseus, Menelaus, etc - because Priam doesn't know who they are. The Greeks have been at war with his kingdom for nine years before this point.

** Within Agamemnon's speech, his method of explaining how badly the Greeks outnumber the Trojans: let's say they have a truce, and each side takes a census, and each group of ten Greek soldiers gets one (male) resident of Troy to pour their wine. "There would be many tens of men lacking a pourer of wine."

* The standard heroic epithets being used at incongruous times. Godlike Paris hiding from Menelaus, godlike and enduring Odysseus running away while Diomedes yells at him to come back, glorious Ajax the Lesser taking a spill face-first into ox dung...

* A wounded Sarpedon thinks he's about to die and begins giving Hector a BuryMeNotOnTheLonePrairie speech. Hector, who he'd been arguing with several verses back, runs right past him without answering.

* Early on in the epic, King Priam calls to Helen to explain to him who is leading the Greek army - Agamemnon, Odysesseus, Menelaus, etc - because Priam doesn't know who they are. The Greeks have been at war with his kingdom for nine years before this point.
* After a long discussion of their ancestries, Glaucus and Diomedes shake hands and exchange armor as a pledge of SacredHospitality. The narrator notes that Glaucus got ripped off, because his armor was worth over ten times as much.

* Early on in Book 2, before the enormous list of Greek fighters and ships, Agamemnon despairs at trying to get the Achaeans motivated to fight. In response, Athena comes down and gives Odysseus a pep talk. Afterwards, he promptly and unceremoniously takes Agamemnon's scepter out of his hands and runs around brow-beating and occasionally actually beating men who were turning from the fight. It all comes to a head when he takes the scepter and beats the crap out of the Argives' resident disfigured hunchback who was doing nothing but making jokes at the Argive leaders' expense. In fact, the narrative itself stops and mentions that the scene was so hilarious, the soldiers in-story were laughing raucously.

* Early on in the epic, King Priam calls to Helen to explain to him who is leading the Greek army - Agamemnon, Odysesseus, Menelaus, etc - because Priam doesn't know who they are. The Greeks have been at war with his kingdom for nine years before this point.

* Early on in the epic, King Priam calls to Helen to explain to him who is leading the Greek army - Agamemnon, Odysesseus, Menelaus, etc - because Priam doesn't know who they are. The Greeks have been at war with his kingdom for nine years before this point.
* When the Gods finally intervene into the fighting in Book 21, Hera and Artemis face off against one another. Hera explains to Artemis, in detail, why she is inferor to Hera. Then she takes Artemis' bow off of her shoulder and beats the Goddess of the Hunt with it, while a serene smile adorns her face. Artemis flees, crying deeply, and runs to Zeus.

* Early on in the epic, King Priam calls to Helen to explain to him who is leading the Greek army - Agamemnon, Odysesseus, Menelaus, etc - because Priam doesn't know who they are. The Greeks have been at war with his kingdom for nine years before this point.

* During the battle between the men and gods, Artemis gets beaten up by Hera with her own bow and literally runs away to her daddy Zeus.

* When [[DidYouJustScamCthulhu Hera seduces Zeus to distract him]], he describes how attractive she is by comparing her with [[LongList some of the other women he's slept with]]. [[OverlyLongGag It takes about 20 lines in the original Greek.]]

* Menelaus beating Paris up with his bare hands, while the latter still has his sword.