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** They help him [[IncrediblyLamePun concentrate.]]

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** They help him [[IncrediblyLamePun [[{{Pun}} concentrate.]]

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* [[MindScrew The entire sequence after Arthur and Ford are rescued.]] Highlights include getting a vat of custard poured on them, donuts materialising out of the pavement, and the [[MonkeysOnATypewriter monkeys on typewriters.]]
** [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext "Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."]]
--> '''Ford''': That's beside the point! The point is that I'm turning into a "perfectly safe" penguin, and my colleague here is rapidly running out of limbs!\\
'''Arthur''': Oh, that's all right, I've got them all back now...admittedly, they're a little longer than I'm used to.



* "Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."
--> '''Ford''': That's beside the point! The point is that I'm turning into a "perfectly safe" penguin, and my colleague here is rapidly running out of limbs!\\
'''Arthur''': Oh, that's all right, I've got them all back now...admittedly, they're a little longer than I'm used to.
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—> The designer of the gun had clearly not been instructed to beat about the bush. ‘Make it evil,’ he’d been told. “Make it totally clear that this gun has a right end and a wrong end. Make it totally clear to anyone standing at the wrong end that things are going badly for them. If that means sticking all sort of spikes and prongs and blackened bits all over it then so be it. This is not a gun for hanging over the fireplace or sticking in the umbrella stand, it is a gun for going out and making people miserable with.’

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—> The -->The designer of the gun had clearly not been instructed to beat about the bush. ‘Make it evil,’ he’d been told. “Make "Make it totally clear that this gun has a right end and a wrong end. Make it totally clear to anyone standing at the wrong end that things are going badly for them. If that means sticking all sort of spikes and prongs and blackened bits all over it then so be it. This is not a gun for hanging over the fireplace or sticking in the umbrella stand, it is a gun for going out and making people miserable with."
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** Extra commentary reveals these things are both the reason Vogons are flat-faced and why they're incapable of thinking.
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-->'''Guide:''' The marketing division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation defines a robot as "your plastic pal who's fun to be with". The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy describes the marketing division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation as "a bunch of mindless jerks who will be first against the wall when the revolution comes". Curiously, a copy of the ''Encyclopedia Galactica'' that had fallen through a time warp from a thousand years in the future describes them as "a bunch of mindless jerks who ''were'' the first against the wall when the revolution came".

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-->'''Guide:''' The marketing division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation defines a robot as "your plastic pal who's fun to be with". The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy describes the marketing division of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation as "a bunch of mindless jerks who will be first against the wall when the revolution comes".comes" (with an additional note to the effect that the Guide would welcome anyone looking to take over the post of robotics correspondant). Curiously, a copy of the ''Encyclopedia Galactica'' that had fallen through a time warp from a thousand years in the future describes them as "a bunch of mindless jerks who ''were'' the first against the wall when the revolution came".



* Vroomfondel the philosopher, who's clearly more invested in being a WeirdTradeUnion representative than in being a philosopher.

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* Vroomfondel the philosopher, who's clearly more invested in being a WeirdTradeUnion representative than in being a philosopher. But he's doing better than Magikthise, at least.
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* The way that our heroes conduct a conversation with Shooty and Bang Bang, the Galactic cops who have them cornered behind a computer bank, in which every trope of stand-offs in dodgy 70s cop shows is parodied:
-->'''Bang Bang''': Now, listen to us, Beeblebrox, and you better listen good!
-->'''Zaphod''': Why?
-->'''Bang Bang''': [''momentarily nonplussed''] Because it's gonna be very intelligent... and quite interesting... and humane.
-->'''Zaphod''': Okay, fire away. [''ZAP''] I mean, shoot. ['''ZAP ZAP ZAP ZAP KAPOW''']
-->'''Bang Bang''': Oh, sorry. [''chuckles''] Little misunderstanding there.
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Pointless snarking about 'literary circles' eliminated.


* When Arthur and Ford are [[AFateWorseThanDeath read poetry]] by Vogon Jeltz, Arthur says, 'Oh, I quite liked it, really', a clear bald-faced lie. (Though he's not known for his taste.) Ford latches onto the idea with both hands, and between the two, they deliver a completely nonsensical analysis of the poem which is both wildly inaccurate, and yet would probably work in many literary circles. Vogon Jeltz is either deeply, terribly amused, or somewhat less than.

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* When Arthur and Ford are [[AFateWorseThanDeath read poetry]] by Vogon Jeltz, Arthur says, 'Oh, I quite liked it, really', a clear bald-faced lie. (Though he's not known for his taste.) Ford latches onto the idea with both hands, and between the two, they deliver a completely nonsensical analysis of the poem which is both wildly inaccurate, and yet would probably work in many a parody of academic literary circles.criticism. Vogon Jeltz is either deeply, terribly amused, or somewhat less than.
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** Before that, the Vl'hurg and Gh'gravahnt War, depicted as an 80s video game, complete with score (final score - 1900 all). Then the dog gets its own score.

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** Before that, the Vl'hurg and Gh'gravahnt G'gugvuntt War, depicted as an 80s video game, complete with score (final score - 1900 all). Then the dog gets its own score.
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* Vroomfondel the philosopher, who's clearly more invested in being a trade union rep than in being a philosopher.

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* Vroomfondel the philosopher, who's clearly more invested in being a trade union rep WeirdTradeUnion representative than in being a philosopher.
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* Vroomfondle the philosopher, who clearly has a few screws missing, not knowing what he's supposed to be demanding and what he isn't.

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* Vroomfondle Vroomfondel the philosopher, who who's clearly has more invested in being a few screws missing, not knowing what he's supposed to be demanding and what he isn't.trade union rep than in being a philosopher.



** The sheer fact Adams named two characters Vroomfondle and Magikthighs to begin with.

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** The sheer fact Adams named two characters Vroomfondle Vroomfondel and Magikthighs Magikthise to begin with.
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** In general, Deep Thought's contemptuous dismissals of the rival claimants to the title of "greatest computer of all time".
--->'''Deep Thought''': Molest me not with this pocket calculator stuff.

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* Everything about the dolphins, the second smartest species on Earth.
** "Man thought he was cleverer than the dolphins because he had achieved so much; the wheel, war, New York, and so on, while all dolphins had done was muck about in the ocean having a good time. Dolphins thought they were cleverer than man for precisely the same reason."
** Dolphinkind's attempts to warn man of the impending destruction of Earth, which they'd long known about (after all, the plans ''were'' on display for fifty years beforehand). However, their attempts were misinterpreted as attempts to punch footballs or play for titbits. Their last try was mistaken as an attempt to do a backwards somersault through a hoop while whistling "The Star-Spangled Banner". It was actually "so long, and thanks for all the fish."
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It's actually the smaller denomination of the third currency that is said to be too large


** The part on the money itself, where it describes the three main currencies, one of which (the altarian dollar) has recently collapsed, the other can only be traded for more of itself, and the third comes in sizes too large to carry in any quantity, and the banks refuse to deal in small change. "From this, we can derive that the galactic banks are ''also'' [[TakeThat the product of a deranged imagination]]."

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** The part on the money itself, where it describes the three main currencies, one of which (the altarian Altarian dollar) has recently collapsed, the other (the Flanian Pobble Bead) can only be traded for more of itself, and while the third comes in sizes too large (the Triganic Pu) has a simple exchange rate of 1 Pu to carry in any quantity, 6 Ningis, a Ningi is a coin 6,800 miles long across each side, and the banks refuse to deal in small change. "From this, we can derive that the galactic banks are ''also'' [[TakeThat the product of a deranged imagination]]."

Added: 1947

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** Wowbagger's plan: he will insult everyone in the universe who ever lived. To their faces. In alphabetical order.
*** Whenever he's told this is impossible, he replies "A man can dream."
** Those born immortal know how to cope with it. Wowbagger does not, and frequently enters a state he describes as "the long dark tea-time of the soul."
*** Early on, he used to turn up to funerals to laugh at the dead. Now he's jealous of them, "the bunch of dead bastards."



** As he and Ford chase the sofa across a prehistoric field, Arthur muses to himself that for once his day is going just as well as he'd hoped: he'd intended to go mad, and now he's chasing a sofa.
** Arthur threw the Guide into a lake, only for Ford to fish it out again. When asked why he never told Arthur, Ford says it's because he didn't want him to throw it back in.



** Agrajag created a neon sign that initally informs Arthur that his teleportation has been diverted, and to not be alarmed. It then changes to a demand to "be very, very frightened."
** Agrajag notes that two of his lives were a rabbit Arthur skinned on pre-historic Earth to make a bag, and a fly that got swatted by said bag. His conclusion is that Arthur isn't just obsessed with murdering him, he's also staggeringly tactless about it.
** How did Agrajag become aware of his cycle of death-and-rebirth? Arthur killed him so frequently that he started having deja-vu, frequently observing that the heartless git that had just left him for dead looked a little familiar.



** The commentators have a conversation about whether or not anything like this has happened before, leading to a story of a streaker that one commentator had witnessed, and the other concludes that the story was completely unlike the events in front of them.




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* The informational illusion Slartibartfast uses to teach Arthur and Ford about the Krikket War has sections devoted to trying to sell the viewer commemorative tat. He instructs the two not to buy anything, because he can't find the remote to fast-foward past it.
* Why is Slartibartfast's ship designed to look like an Italian restaurant? It runs on bistromathics, a science based on how numbers operate completely differently on a restaurant bill.
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"arsehole" is the original line; "kneebiter" is the Bowdlerized version.


* Arthur's encounter with [[ImmortalImmaturity Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged]]: "You're a jerk, Dent. A complete kneebiter[[note]]Some versions replace this with "arsehole"[[/note]]."

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* Arthur's encounter with [[ImmortalImmaturity Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged]]: "You're a jerk, Dent. A complete kneebiter[[note]]Some arsehole[[note]]Some versions replace this with "arsehole"[[/note]]."kneebiter"[[/note]]."
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** Funnier still in the Live-Action TV adaptation, where it talks in MachineMonotone.
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** It's mentioned that the technology used in the Infinite Improbability Drive was developed to break the ice at parties by causing the hostess' undergarments three feet to the left. Many respectable physicists wouldn't stand for it, partially because it was a debasement of science, but mostly because they never got invited to those sort of parties.
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'''Councilman''': It is most gratifying that your enthusiasm for our planet continues unabated. As a token of our appreciation, we hope you will [[HaveANiceDeath enjoy the two thermonuclear missiles we've just sent to converge with your craft/]] To ensure on-going quality of service, your death may be monitored for training purposes. Thank you.

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'''Councilman''': It is most gratifying that your enthusiasm for our planet continues unabated. As a token of our appreciation, we hope you will [[HaveANiceDeath enjoy the two thermonuclear missiles we've just sent to converge with your craft/]] craft.]] To ensure on-going quality of service, your death may be monitored for training purposes. Thank you.

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