Funny / Girls with Slingshots

• The Alt Text for this strip.
  "Because romance starts with you. And your vibrator."
• When Jamie believes that the married man who supplies her flower store with roses is her secret admirer:
  Jamie: Augh, I knew it! I'm a homewrecker!
  Flora: Honey, that's ridiculous. You are not a homewrecker.
  Jamie: (looking down at her breasts) Augh! YOU'RE homewreckers!
  Flora: That's probably more accurate.
• The Daily Tribune shuts its doors. The staff does not take it well.
• What the hell was in that flask?
• Poor Chris can never catch a break.
  Jameson: I thought you knew some sign language?
  Chris: I do but I have dicks on my face.
  Jameson: Oh! That's okay dude, she can read lips.
• In order to discover the identity of a guy who wrote in Hazel's old high school yearbook, Hazel and Jamie disguise themselves as cheerleaders so that they can infiltrate the school and open up his locker. Hazel gets spotted by an actual cheerleader.
  Hazel: Cheerleading is not a sport, it's— [notices cheerleader standing behind her] —ah, it's an art. Hello.
  Cheerleader: [holding out small pot] Do you want to use some of my wrinkle cream?
  Hazel: [Death Glare] Bitch I will cut you.
• Clarice attempts to school Tucker in talking to women. When he complains that women don't say what they mean, she points out that when he first asked her out, she said "No" and meant it, and he went on anyway, thinking he could wear her down. He protests that that's how it works in romantic comedies, and she gives him homework: to watch three films that, unlike romantic comedies, depict healthy romantic relationships. Unfortunately:
  Clarice: Number one... [Pause while she tries to actually think of any] ... Lion King.
• The entire sequence of Hazel trying to find a way to inflate her new sex toy almost counts, but the part where she goes into a party shop wearing Groucho Marx glasses and a hoodie most certainly does!
• When Jameson takes Maureen into the coat room to have sex, Hazel, Jamie and Clarice pass the time by speculating what kind of hair he has under his bandana.
  Hazel: Maybe it's a curly fro.
  Jamie: Maybe every day is a bad hair day!
  Clarice: Maybe it's a mullet!
  Jamie: Oh WOW, what if Jameson's hiding a MULLET?!
  Clarice: Okay, I'm tingling. We have to find out.
  Maureen: [entering the room after finishing up with Jameson] Find out what?
  Jamie: About Jameson's—
  Clarice: [panicking and covering Jamie's mouth] NOTHING!
  Maureen: *sigh* Look, it's true. It's 7 inches long. Are you happy now?
  Jamie: [incredulous] HIS MULLET IS 7 INCHES LONG?!
• Hazel can't spend any time around Jamie's kitten without her allergies flaring up. She thinks she has a solution to the problem. It completely backfires.
• Jamie getting a little sexually frustrated in her sexless relationship with Erin, leading to this incident in a bar:
  Jamie: These boobs won't grope themselves!
  Hazel: Things you don't shout out at a bar. But yeah, I get it...
  Jamie: That and I miss BOYS. Those big hard lumps in their pants...
  Hazel (glancing over her shoulder at the rest of the bar): Jamie STOP...
  Jamie: I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO RAVAGE MY BODY!
  Hazel (now holding off the entire bar full of horny guys): Noooo Jamie I can't hold them RUN...
• Chibi Hazel.
  Chibi Danielle: Read below and tell me what you think of the rewards I've come up with thus far!
  Chibi Hazel: [holding a bottle of booze and wearing a Unicorn Hat] Did you SERIOUSLY fucking "CHIBI" ME
  • Complete with hover text:
    I seriously wanna fucking Chibi Hazel in Chibi Unicorn Hat ALL THE TIME
• Jamie and Erin go to a costume party as Calvin and Hobbes, although it takes a moment for Clarice to recognise it:
  Jamie: [with short blond hair, wearing a striped t-shirt] A red-headed Alice, ooh la la!
  Clarice: At your service. And you're...
  [Enter Erin in a tiger costume]
  Clarice: Uhh, Aryan race Jungle Book?
  Jamie: Oh, hang on
  [With a "POP", Jamie's eyes go empty, making her look like Calvin]
  Clarice: Oh! Calvin and Hobbes.
  Erin: Bingo.
  Jamie: [panicking] AUGH they're stuck
  • To top the joke, by the next strip, one of her eyes is still stuck like that.