- When Nessa is giving birth to Neil (the baby), Smithy and Gavin, having travelled all the way from Billericay, are running full pelt down the hospital corridor so Smithy doesn't miss it. They simultaneously slip on a patch of wet floor and fall over hilariously in the corridor. Then, without a word, they get up and continue running.
Smithy: GAVIN, GO!!
- Smithy lifting up the barrier when the tollbooth woman wouldn't let them through because they were 10p short.
- The policeman who won't stop talking and Smithy's repeated, "OH, GOD." every time he begins another tirade.
- When everyone has heard that Gavin's dad will be on the TV and gather together complete with champagne, then it's revealed that it's because he's found a dead body. They sit down and watch the news:
George Alagiah: A murderer strikes again in Essex: a dismembered body is found in a Billericay car park.
- How about the Christmas Episode? "I've been drinking all day. I'm drunk now, if the truth be told. The thing with Scott is, he's a bit of a pothead, he is. He loves his skunk. And he's been trying to get me to have a go. Well, I did all that back in the 60's. And I said to him, 'you knock yourself out, love, but I'm sticking to the wine.' Well, that was ten o'clock this morning, and to tell you the truth, Gwen, I'm absolutely twatted."
- Also in the Christmas special: Gwen and Bryn wish everyone a merry Christmas in Welsh - 'Nadolig Llawen.' Pam responds, "Funny, that, cos I use Clarins!"
- "Where's the salad, where's the salad? THERE'S the salad, now LEAVE ME ALONE!"
- Bryn and Nessa communicating via walkie-talkie as they travel to Billericay.
"Oh, Bryn. I'm not bein' funny - you can't call me Nessa on the airwaves. You've gotta use my codename.""And what's that?""Robert Mugabe.""Sorry, Robert. And what's my name?""Bryn."
- Everyone dancing to Madness. Mick is passed out in the couch. He and Nessa have switched shirts.
- Dawn fell over.
- Mick smoking a fag and coughing his guts up. Then Pete smoking one back to front.
- Smithy's rant about everyone wanting to eat his curry.
- You could list the whole script of that particular episode.