I desired the chest for my own use, Thor. Still, if I was able to sow doubt and unrest amongst thy subjects, the day was a good one for Loki, the Trickster!
Welcome, Midgardian, or whichever other insignificant being you might be. (The internet's becoming quite popular, after all.)BEHOLDthe majesty of Loki Laufeyson, Prince of Asgard and Jottunheim, God of Mischief and Evil, the universe's rightful king and Arch-Enemy of The Mighty Thor, your hero and my dear, weak, softhearted sibling.I was born of Laufey, King of the Frost Giants, in an age long since past, but of course, my true beginnings lie with a man with a typewriter, and his partner, who brought me, my world, and the rest of the cosmos into existence in 1960s, the so-called Silver Age. Rest assured, mortal, I know the truth of my reality, and I can even claim credit for sharing it with a well-known other and destroying his already fragile grasp on our fake reality. Readers were introduced to me in "Journey into Mystery" vol. 1 #85 (October, 1962)Laufey was a brute of a father, ashamed as he was of my comparatively non-giant size, but as luck- and mine own hand- would have it, Laufey would be slain in battle with the All-Father Odin, Lord of Asgard, and thanks to his love and pity I was taken from Jottunheim and raised as his own son as an Aesir, the giant who became a god, alongside his bloodson Thor.But as Thor and I aged so did my happiness fade. The Asgardians- a race of proud warrior deities, loved Thor for his courage, his might, his reckless buffoonery, whilst my talents lay in cunning and sorcery.And like a true brother, I came to detest him.I arranged for Thor to be exiled to your puny world of Midgard in mortal form, and plotted his death, unleashing scores of monsters and mayhem upon your world in pursuit of that goal, whilst in Asgard I schemed to realize my destiny and take my rightful place on the Allfathers' throne. My plots against Thor were thwarted time and again, and when I pitted him against The Incredible Hulk I made new mortal enemies when Earth's Mightiest Heroes united for the first time, in opposition of me.But Loki cannot be humbled. I bartered with other mortals and gave them power to fight this new team; I schemed with other villains- for what am I if not a villain?- and sought to defeat Thor and his allies with their aid; and I worked, tirelessly still, to one day claim Odin's crown which looks so much better on my noble head than it does my feeble brother's.And after decades and centuries of planning and plots, I finally achieved my goal- and for my troubles, Thor brought about Ragnarok.I did not seek the destruction of Asgard; I have never sought something so terrible, but Thor's actions freed us from the tyranny of the Shadow gods, and we were reborn.I returned as a woman, but regained my masculinity in short order, and once again worked for the good of Asgard ... and the defeat of Thor. But I paid a heavy price for my actions and I died once again, only to rise once more this time as a child - innocent, trusting, but still wily as Mischief must be.I have become more ... appreciative, of Thor my brother, for at least he, alone among the Aesir, treats me with trust and love. I now put my mind towards more ... benevolent ends, and have assisted Thor and his friends in their hours of need- even if I am still more savvy about how their principles sometimes get in the way of their own good. And still I work for the good of Asgard, the only true home I have ever known.Until, of course, a man with a typewriter needs the God of Mischief once more...A series of films tells the tales of Thor and me, as well as his allies. The lofty task of portraying my glorious likeness was given to one Tom Hiddleston. One cannot imagine how delighted I was to see that he performed his role masterfully. The fact that he has also caught the desires of many a mortal woman as myself is an especially delicious triumph over my half-brother. And if not for that green beast of few words, the outcome of the latter film would have been far more enjoyable... At any rate, I also appear in the sequel, where I'm up to my old tricks again which has a most satisfying ending where I now sit on the throne of Asgard.For some of my more recent exploits can be found here and here.Comics
Abusive Parents: Laufey was not a good father, but he suffered for his transgressions. As a time-travelling adult I took revenge on my wounded progenitor with a sword, screaming "YOU WILL NEVER STRIKE ME AGAIN!"
A Day in the Limelight: There are some who see Loki as the hero that he is and as of #622, I- in my younger form- have taken over the main Thor books as the protagonist (Thor is the protagonist in another one) and they have been renamed Journey in Mystery, to great critical acclaim. Along with my solo adventures as of October 2012 I am also a member of the Young Avengers.
Always Someone Better: LIES!!!! Loki has NO EQUAL, much less a superior. Nevertheless in Asgard, because of my giant heritage, I was always overlooked for my accursed brother, Thor. This, coupled with Abusive Parents above, is what lesser beings say is the source of my nature but truly I simply am who I am.
Ambition Is Evil: My ambitions are, or so Thor and the fools of Asgard seem to believe.
Amplifier Artifact: The Norn Stones are my most prominent though I have a collection of these.
Amnesiac Dissonance: The point of the New Journey into Mystery Arc-I am a preteen again, with no memories form before my preteen years (except for in my nightmares). I therefore do not remember my hatred of Thor, which started when we were teens. Instead, I adore him.
Arch-Enemy: I am Thor's greatest and most personal enemy.
Badass Bookworm: My intelligence is without question and I may be an unusually scholarly Asgardian, but I am still a Norse god, and one does not grow up amongst the Aesir without learning how to fight, nor have a blood feud with The Mighty Thor without being good at it.
Baleful Polymorph: Amongst other things, I have transmogrified Thor into a frog and my own grandfather into the snow- yes, the snow, as in, all snow everywhere.
Batman Gambit: Why does the Caped Crusader get this named after him when I have been playing Thor, the Avengers and all of Asgard like a fiddle since time immemorial?
Perhaps I might be a little ... dishonest with myself, insofar as how much I truly detest Thor, and I might begrudgingly admit there are some things I might admire about him, at least now that I have forgotten that I ever hated him in the first place. Even if daddy doesn't like it.
As "Kid Loki" at least, I'm justified with this line of thought, as Thor is currently the only person who likes me at all and is nice to me.
Black Magic: One of the many branches of power avaliable to me and another contrast with my muscle bound brute of a brother.
Consummate Liar: I would say that I do not lie nearly so often as everyone else seems to believe; then again, I am so good at it, aren't I?
Cool Helmet: I admit it looks better on my live action incarnation.
Cool and Unusual Punishment: In The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes, after my defeat at the end of the first season, Odin locked me in a prison wherein a giant snake dripped poison into my eyes. A punishment copied from the original mythology, no less. But if you call that "cool" again, I'll put you through it, and see how "cool" you think it is.
Daddy's Little Villain: If only. My dear Hela is neither little — thrice my size, in fact; apparently giantism skips a generation — nor particularly fond of me. Our relationships are rather ... strained, at best, and though we sometimes co-operate most of the time, the ungrateful wretch wants nothing to do with me. Unfortunately, as the Goddess of the Dead she is much more powerful than me as well, and worse I may even be destined to someday end up in her custody. Apparently, the insolent fool thinks me rather ... childish, but I am the God of Mischief after all, so I do have a reputation to live up to.
Dark and Troubled Past: My early childhood was littered with neglect and physical abuse. Also the fact I'm a runt giant, 1/5 the size of my kindred however if my oaf of a father had not abandoned me in the ice, Odin would not have taken me in and I might not have evolved into the god I am.
Dating Catwoman: I once had a prolonged relationship with Storm, of the X-Men, when she and the New Mutants were stranded in Asgard — I even gave her back her Elemental Powers, as she had been depowered at the time. When I was... persuaded... to send them all back to Midgard, I offered her a chance to stay with me as my queen, and even had to admit to myself that having her as my own might have been worth losing the throne. While she turned down my generous offer, and I have scorned her ever since, I did sentimentally take the molten remains of the thunder-hammer I had used to empower her and reshape it into a statue of her to keep as a momento.
Some people have not let go of the fact that when I empowered Storm, I did so by giving her a hammer very much like Mjolnir. Or of the fact her outfit was basically a feminized version of my brother's...
Deadpan Snarker: Very much so. My live action incarnation has some moments this that are likely the funniest moments in the Avengers film.
Deal with the Devil: I have been pressed-ganged into deals with actual devils at times, such as my forced alliance with the dread Dormammu, but I have been on the better end of this more often than not; Crusher Creel, the Absorbing Man, is just one of many mortals who have gained special gifts courtesy of myself. If I may be so modest, I am rather more honorable in my dealings than others that might be mentioned...
Thor and Odin always forgive me in the end and give me another chance, but I refuse to accept their mercy.
Averted with my return as a child. Odin has apparently run out of patience with Thor being the only reason I have not been banished or killed. The only person who has forgiven me is Thor. Everyone else wants to kill me.
Averted with my Marvel Cinematic Universe incarnation. Thor and Odin do not forgive me after my attempted invasion of Migard, and Thor only releases me since he expected me to help deal with Maliketh.
Enemy Mine: Surtur once attempted to destroy Asgard. Odin and Thor stood in his way. I temporarily put aside my differences with my father and brother to fight Surtur at their side, because...
My role in Thor Dark World. Malekith killed our mother, and Thor convinced me to go along with a plan of his for revenge.
Evil Is Petty: Loki is never petty! Admittedly, my main motivation is showing up my pathetic brother, by any means necessary but then, I'd say he had it coming.
The Evil Prince: Well I am a Prince, rightfully a king and I am very good at being evil.
Evil Plan: I set my sights on Odin's throne or otherwise see how I can make Thor suffer.
Evil Sorcerer: My knowledge of the mystic arts is unparalled in all of Asgard, even though many mighty sorcerers and sorceresses make it their home.
Evil Versus Oblivion: I already have stated as much my aim is conquest, not destruction. I stated this simply during a fight with Surtur, there's is no point in my ruling all that I survey if all I survey is burned to a cinder.
The Fighting Narcissist: If you must use such a loaded term, Loki would say that merely maintains a healthy and realistic awareness of his own greatness but I can certainly fight and my style is far more based on grace and agility than brute strength.
I've manipulated everyone in Asgard at some time or another. Fitting, given that I am the god of deception. Oh and in this case, "bastard" is meant literally. I insist that I'm not really the "God of Lies", just mischief. Of course, I'm such a good liar anyway, who could ever tell?
I am so good that even when people know not to trust me (which has been Status Quo for fifteen real time years), I still end up manipulating them anyway.
My younger self needs to be this since I don't have my magic, only my brains and my silver tongue.
My Species Doth Protest Too Much: Frost Giants are very big, very stupid, and typically Dumb Muscle. I am a brilliant schemer, a powerful sorcerer, and slightly shorter than Thor (the horns on my helmet notwithstanding) and very slender. While I am still very strong and durable, that is primarily in comparison to the so called superheroes and villains of Earth, not Asgardians or other Frost Giants.
Nice Job Fixing It, Villain: I once schemed to pit Thor in a deadly battle against the Hulk, but someotherheroes showed up as well. My plot was soon uncovered, and - much to my later irritation - I ended up inadvertently bringing the Avengers together. Indeed, this incident is my single greatest regret in life.
Nigh-Invulnerability: As a small Frost giant I am as durable and strong as any average Aesir, though I am not naturally as durable as that muscle-bound moron, Thor. Fortunately, as a sorcerer, I have supernatural durability as I have granted myself a range of advantages no other Aesir has- most Asgardians would be more bothered than I at the prospect of decapitation, for a start.
Physical God: I am of Asgard; my power, my age, my strength are all godlike.
Pop Cultural Osmosis Failure: I would like to safely say that this is not the case. It looks like assimilating my child self has given me knowledge of Internet culture and popular media such as Game of Thrones, despite being of a species and from a culture vastly different from that of Midgard.
Having now been granted an older body through Wiccan's magic, I now have the appearance of a young adult in their late teens/early twenties. The reaction from the denizens of the internet seems to be, and I quote, "Oh no he's hot."◊
Psychopathic Manchild: Type C, if you think, as some do, that this applied to me. God of Mischief and all that- I suppose I can understand.
Psychic Powers: I can enter the minds of hapless victims, such as the Hulk to turn him on Thor.
Rage Against the Author: It's hard not the read the entirety of my younger self's sacrifice without seeing a touch of... aggravation at the fact that, because of the Editors and my new found popularity as the villain of the Avenger's, no matter what this was only a temporary arrangement. He even looks at the viewer while describing how it's beyond either of our power to make the story have a happy ending. (He declares that an unspecified "they" won't let me change, the imprudent brat). The only way for the new Loki to be allowed to change without being forced to become evil at some point in the future under a new writer is for my younger self to be entirely erased from existence. This is admittedly something that can be undone if someone has the gall to.
Smug Snake: I admit that sometimes I am a little ... overconfident, and my plans don't go quite the way I want them to, and that I might, on the odd occasion, be somewhat responsible for my own failures, and maybe not take them as well as I could. But if you were a Physical God and master of sorcery with a genius level intellect, you'd be high on yourself too.
Sorcerous Overlord: On the occasions I managed to ascend to my rightful place as King of Asgard.
Squishy Wizard: Only by Asgardian standards. I am a far superior physical specimen and warrior than any mortal.
Super Empowering: I turned Crusher Creel into the Absorbing Man and have given powers to several other less known villains; I also gave The Hood some Norn Stones when his arrangement with Dormammu predictably took a bad turn. I'm quite fond of this. And I'm so generous that I allow them to keep their powers even if they fail me.
Correction, I didn't let The Hood keep the Norn Stones since I found the Avengers needed them to fight the Void. What, you thought I let somebody keep something like those even if I needed them myself?
Superpower Lottery: When you are from a race of gods that can lift tons above one's head and has mastery over sorcery, this isn't really surprising.
Time Travel: I can do this more or less at will; it gives me a distinct advantage when carrying out my Plans. Even I cannot guess how much of Asgardian history was shaped by me until I decide to go back and affect it- the disappearance of my foster grandfather, my own adoption and the death of Laufey, and who knows what else? All me, and I didn't even know it!
Weaksauce Weakness: When I first appeared, I had one- I couldn't use my powers when wet. Against Thor, who could easily make it rain. Do you wonder why this is ignored now?
Well-Intentioned Extremist: Do not imagine that all my ambitions are selfish in nature; I have worked for the good of Asgard when it needed me, and the universe on occasion, and often I see the answers more clearly than the so-called "heroes" who are held back by too many ethics.
(The above should be read in the voice of Tom Hiddleston or Graham McTavish.)