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1-> '''[[ZombieInfectee Church Guy]]:''' ''"Who's there?"''\
2'''Francis:''' ''"Let's see, I'm Francis, and that's grandpa Bill, and '''there's zombies out here, open the goddamn door!'''"''
3
4-> '''Bill:''' ''"We've been immune so far, but, well, if I start to turn, promise you'll shoot me."''\
5'''Francis:''' ''"What if just your beard starts to turn, can I shoot that?"''\
6'''Bill:''' ''"Don't be an ass, Francis."''
7
8-> '''Zoey:''' ''"Hey Francis, your latest issue of 'Hating Everything' magazine is here."''\
9'''Francis:''' ''"I hate latest issues."''
10
11-> '''Louis''': ''"We made it... I can't believe we made it!"''\
12'''Bill''': ''"Son, we just crossed the street. Let's not throw a party 'til we're out of the city."''
13
14-> '''Louis''': ''"We're gonna find that sailboat right around the corner, you just watch!"''\
15'''Francis''': ''"Louis, if you don't stop being positive, I'm gonna sink the boat just to make you sad!"''
16
17-> '''Francis''': ''"I hate helicopters. I hate hospitals. And doctors and lawyers and cops..."''\
18'''Bill''': ''"Francis, is there anything you don't hate?"''\
19'''Francis''': ''"You know what I don't hate? I don't hate vests."''
20
21->'''Bill''': ''"I'll see peace back on earth if I gotta murder every one of these bastards with my bare goddamn hands."''
22
23-> '''Coach:''' "Report unusual behavior. Barricade your homes. Avoid all contact with infected individuals. Wait for official instructions." Wait, my ass.\
24'''Ellis:''' ([[DramaticGunCock Cocks shotgun]]) Kill all sons-a-bitches, that's my 'ficial instructions.
25-->--Intro Cutscene
26
27-> '''Coach:''' Who the hell... puts an evac station... up thirty flights of goddamn stairs?\
28'''Nick:''' Come on, Coach. Maybe the helicopter... maybe it's made of chocolate.
29-->--Intro Cutscene
30
31-> This used to be a ''nice neighborhood!''
32-->--'''Coach''', Intro Cutscene
33
34-> I have ''not''... come this far... to die now.
35-->--'''Nick''', Intro Cutscene[=/=]Near-Death dialogue
36
37-> Okay, we'll set off the pyrotechnics, but I'm telling you right now. I AM NOT GOING TO AIR GUITAR.
38-->--'''Nick''', ''Dark Carnival'' Finale
39
40-> '''Nick''': So, how are we going to signal Virgil?\
41'''Ellis''': Oh, there's flares in the gun bag.\
42'''Nick''': What gun bag?\
43'''Ellis''': You didn't grab the guns?\
44'''Nick''': ''Me?!'' Who died and made ''me'' gun monitor?!\
45'''Ellis''': [[DeadpanSnarker Pretty much everybody.]]\
46'''Coach:''' Look here, [[TemptingFate the gas station's right across the street. We coulda already been there and back by now.]] Come on.
47-->--''Hard Rain'' Intro
48
49->'''Coach:''' Hello?\
50'''Military:''' Rescue 7, that's coming from the bridge! Bridge, identify yourself.\
51'''Coach:''' Hey! There's four of us on the bridge!\
52'''Military:''' Bridge, are you immune?\
53'''Coach:''' We are not infected.\
54'''Military:''' Negative Bridge. Are you ''immune?'' Have you encountered the infected?\
55'''Coach:''' ''[indignant]'' "Encountered"?! Boy, I am covered in zombie blood and puke, and eyeballs, and ''twenty'' other parts I don't even recognize. We are ''immune as SHIT!''

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