1 | ->''"Action Jesus! Manger sold separately."'' |
2 | -->-- '''Crow T. Robot''', ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000'' "Santa Claus" |
3 | |
4 | ->''"Wachowski brothers fans have noted the deliberate parallels between the messianic Neo and the Biblical story of the moneychangers in the temple, in which Christ pulled out a Beretta and killed about 50 security guards."'' |
5 | -->--''{{Website/Cracked}}'' on ''Film/TheMatrix'' |
6 | |
7 | ->''"Kung-Fu Action Jesus! He's fighting the bad guys and making them pay, with Magic Kung Fu, he'll save the day! It's Kung Fu Action Jesus!"'' |
8 | -->-- ''WebVideo/AvatarTheAbridgedSeries'' |
9 | |
10 | ->''"Super Mecha Death Christ 2000 B.C. 4.0 Beta, [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch bitch!]]"'' |
11 | -->--'''WebVideo/TheAngryVideoGameNerd''' |
12 | |
13 | ->''"In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! '''I have overcome the world'''."'' |
14 | -->--'''Jesus''', ''Literature/TheBible'', John, 16:33 (NIV) |
15 | |
16 | ->''"Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword."'' |
17 | -->--'''Jesus''', ''Literature/TheBible'', Matthew, 10:34 (NIV) |
18 | |
19 | ->[Being held up by two Iraqi soldiers]\ |
20 | "''My children, you should know something.''\ |
21 | '''''...I'm packing.'''''" |
22 | -->--'''Jesus''', in the episode ''Red Sleigh Down,'' WesternAnimation/SouthPark |
23 | |
24 | -> ''"This summer, let he who is without sin...''kick the first ass''."'' |
25 | -->--''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'' |
26 | |
27 | -> ''SUPER JESUS: Where is your Satan now!?"'' |
28 | -->--FauxtivationalPoster using the page pic. |
29 | |
30 | -> ''"Jesus Christ... Superstar... [[BadassBiker burning 'round the corner on a Yamaha]]"'' |
31 | -->-- Parody of ''Theatre/JesusChristSuperstar'' |
32 | |
33 | -> ''You can't do what Jesus can do (Jesus shits all over you)\ |
34 | There are three of him, and there's only one of you (and Jesus can fly)\ |
35 | He can cure a blind man, you can't cure the flu\ |
36 | He's a zombie wizard, who also knows kung fu'' |
37 | -->-- '''Music/TheAxisOfAwesome''', "What Would Jesus Do" |
38 | |
39 | -> ''Jesus is coming, and he is pissed!'' |
40 | -->-- '''Bill Robinson''', Stephen King's ''Film/MaximumOverdrive'' |
41 | |
42 | ->"''Imagine if Jesus knew kung-fu; that's what everybody is dealing with.''" |
43 | -->-- '''John Morrison''', ''ECW on Sci-Fi'' |
44 | |
45 | -> ''[Fred Dryer] was TV's Hunter?! That's like finding out Jesus knew karate! Imagine that, Stan, karate Jesus!'' |
46 | -->-- '''[[CloudCuckooLander Xander Crews]]''', ''WesternAnimation/FriskyDingo'' |
47 | |
48 | ->''"Alright, motherfuckers. In times like this, religion is often forgotten, so I'm gonna remind you of how awesome Jesus is. First off, his [[PowerLevel power level]] is fucking 9,001. THAT IS [[MemeticMutation OVER 9 THOUSAND]]! Show some respect for that. He'd kick all your asses. Second, he dares to have a Mexican name despite the fact that he is not Mexican. Only the greats do that. Third, he could conjure water and self-rez when his [[PartyWipe group wiped]] for the fifth fucking time that night so no one had to run back. That's a fucking time-saver right there! And finally, he is a great supporter of cannibalism. So much so that he actually ENCOURAGES people to eat his flesh and drink his blood. Any questions?"'' |
49 | -->--taken from a Website/GaiaOnline roleplay post |
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