| 1 | ->''"To alcohol! The cause of and solution to all of life's problems!"'' |
| 2 | -->-- '''Homer Simpson''', ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' |
| 3 | |
| 4 | ->''"Drink is the curse of the land. It makes you fight with your neighbor. It makes you shoot at your landlord and it makes you miss him."'' |
| 5 | -->-- '''Irish Proverb''' |
| 6 | |
| 7 | ->''"Whilst traveling through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. Had to live on food and water for several days."'' |
| 8 | -->-- '''Creator/WCFields''', ''My Little Chickadee'' (1940) |
| 9 | |
| 10 | ->''"Drunk and disorderly tonight again. Thanks be to God."'' |
| 11 | -->-- '''Tommy Makem''', Irish Folk Singer |
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