Line #20 Funny/Moneyball


1	One's bound to get this with a script that Aaron Sorkin helped write.
2	----
3	* The daughter's song at the end of the movie is pretty bittersweet, with the concluding lyrics being "you're such a loser, dad."
4	* The scenes between Billy Beane and the scouts.
5	-->'''Billy Beane:''' Is there another first baseman like Giambi?
6	-->'''Scout:''' No, not really.
7	-->'''Billy Beane:''' If there was, could we afford him?
8	-->'''Scout:''' No.
9	-->'''Billy Beane:''' Then what the fuck are you talking about, man?
10	* Billy's first conversation with Peter Brand, whose LiteralMinded answer to Billy's metaphorical question about why Cleveland GM Mark Shapiro took Peter's advice to reject a trade proposal annoys Billy:
11	-->'''Billy Beane:''' Who are you?
12	-->'''Peter Brand:''' ''[confused]'' I'm Peter Brand.
13	-->'''Beane:''' I don't give a rat's ass what your ''name'' is.
14	* Beane, along with his coach Ron Washington, visits Scott Hatteberg, a former catcher, to tell him they're putting him at first:
15	-->'''Beane:''' ...You never played first base.
16	-->'''Hatteberg:''' Right.
17	-->'''Beane:''' It's not that hard, Scott. Tell him, Wash.
18	-->'''Washington:''' It's incredibly hard.
19	** A little later in the scene, Hatteberg wonders about what the fans will think, and Wash responds, "[[DeadpanSnarker Yeah, maybe I can teach one of them (how to play first base).]]"
20	* "Who's Fabio?"
21	** "A shortstop. He's a shortstop with Seattle..."
22	* Towards the end of the film, after once again falling short of the World Series, Peter and Billy sit in silence after watching the video of a minor league player who attempted to round first, embarassingly fell, then discovered he'd already hit a home run.
23	-->'''Peter:''' ...It's a metaphor-
24	-->'''Billy:''' -I ''know'' it's a metaphor.
25	* David Justice has been asked to try and help Scott Hatteberg make the transition to first baseman by being a mentor and building up his confidence.
26	-->'''David Justice:''' What's your biggest fear?
27	-->'''Scott Hatteberg:''' A baseball being hit in my general direction. (''both laugh'')
28	-->'''David:''' That's funny. Seriously, what is it?
29	-->'''Scott:''' No, seriously, that is. (''walks away'')
30	-->'''David:''' (''calling after him'') Well, hey, good luck with that.
31	* After Phillies GM Ed Wade agrees to deal for Jeremy Giambi, Beane hangs up, cutting Wade off mid-sentence:
32	-->'''Peter''': ...I think he was going to say something else.
33	-->'''Billy''': When you get the answer you're looking for, hang up.
34	* After Billy tries to help Peter in the situation of talking to a player that he has to cut:
35	-->'''Billy:''' Would you rather get shot in the head, or get shot five times in the chest and bleed to death?
36	-->'''Peter:''' ...[[TakeAThirdOption Are those my only two options?]]
37	** It becomes even more hilarious when Billy forces Peter to tell Carlos Pena he's been traded. Peter is a complete NervousWreck as he explains the situation to Carlos and gives him his new itinerary. Meanwhile, Carlos is completely nonchalant about it, understanding that being traded is just part of the business.

Context Funny / Moneyball