History Website / NotAlwaysRightMToT

15th Dec '13 6:18:08 PM BlueGuy
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[[folder:M]]
* MaamShock: [[http://notalwaysright.com/beauty-is-in-the-eye-of-the-bag-holder/8747 "Do I look old enough to be a ma'am?"]]
* MacGyvering: [[http://notalwaysright.com/lt-ripley-vs-the-wasp-queen/8007 No wasp spray?]] I'll just "DIY" a flamethrower.
* MachineWorship: [[http://notalwaysright.com/all-hail-lord-konica/1013 All hail Lord Konica!]]
* MajorInjuryUnderreaction: [[http://notalwaysright.com/it-almost-never-hurts-to-check/748 I guess this knife is sharp enough.]]
* {{Malaproper}}:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/may-we-suggest-the-covert-cauliflowers/1594 "You're running out of espionage."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/it-burns-when-i-download/1573 "I usually download my pictures in Chlamydia."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/miss-diagnosis/2570 "I think my son has Liza Minnelli!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/chinchilla-i-choose-you/7792 Chinchilla, I Choose You!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-films-are-just-sick/5913 Some Films Are Just Sick]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-horrors-of-mispronunciation-part-4/14876 So close, but]] let's not go here.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dangerously-cheesy/14267 Mad Cow Cheese]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/clothing-that-just-takes-control/17682 "Where can I leave my domination clothing?"]]
** Even the person reporting the story had no idea what [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-art-of-ignorance/15928 this art museum patron meant]].
** And subverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-meant-what-i-said-and-i-said-what-i-meant/14951 here]].
** In [[http://notalwaysright.com/get-the-correct-word-step-by-step/10195 two]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/you-got-the-wrongest-item-part-4/9504 instances]], these people say pedophile when they meant pedometer.
* MaleGaze:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/rare-flashes-of-intelligence/4436 Oh, about a B cup.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/north-of-the-moral-border/4097 This one]] as well.
* MamaBear:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-mother-goes-out-of-her-way-to-get-in-the-way/30612 A mother]] tells off another customer who almost rammed her child.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-nurses-should-rule-the-world-part-5/31268 This mother]] tells off a [[{{Jerkass}} very rude and hard-of-hearing hospital visitor]] who berates her daughter, and gets him thrown out of the hospital for his behavior.
* {{Masquerade}}: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/the-truth-is-waaay-out-there/17945 Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter]]" -- it's from the same guy who wrote "Inconvenient Truth".
* MathematiciansAnswer: [[http://notalwaysright.com/please-press-any-brain-cell-to-continue/3594 "Can I have your zip code, please?"]]
** Sadly subverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/enigmatic-espresso/2032 here]]. Assuming the false dilemma where none exists is not going to get you your... um, whatever you're ordering.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/at-least-this-customer-is-honest/38 Two for one.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/gluttony-or-gluttony/291 And God only knows what's going on here...]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/parts-laboring-the-obvious/18232 And this one.]]
** What does [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-that-narrows-it-down-part-3/22438 this patient]] remember about their doctor? "Its either a man or a woman."
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-that-narrows-it-down-part-2/11193 "What sort of work are you looking for?" "Outdoor work... and indoor work."]]
** What kind of bread does [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-that-narrows-it-down/1686 this man]] want for his beef brisket sandwich? "The square kind."
* MeddlingParents: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-all-re-cycling-is-good/5817 No, I generate enough of "crazy" on my own]]. Also, FelonyMisdemeanor.
** One slightly disturbed, as opposed to downright crazy, [[http://notalwaysright.com/bow-wow-bigotry/15124 here]].
* MeetCute: one [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-match-made-in-size-7/1490 example here]].
** Another one [[http://notalwaysright.com/on-the-straight-and-narrow-minded/2389 here]]; bonus points for the homophobe getting his comeuppance.
* MindScrew: A few entries, such as [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-secret-language-of-customers/3342 these]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/nothin-like-a-good-old-existential-meltdown/702 two]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/indecisively-incognito/14882 This guy.]] "You asked if you were speaking to John Smith, and I said yes. But I'm not telling you who I am. C'mon, I wanna do the survey."
* MissConception: [[http://notalwaysright.com/needs-to-get-their-education-straight/25149 This girl]] honestly believes that lesbians can't get pregnant. She declares that she is a lesbian herself, despite also declaring to have a sexual relationship with her boyfriend. [[InsaneTrollLogic So she can't possibly be pregnant, because she is a lesbian]], which she isn't.
* MisplacedWildlife:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/bird-brained-part-4/2444 Arctic]] penguins.
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/a-whale-of-a-story-2/22165 I assure you, maam, there is little danger of me actually harming a whale in Utah.]]"
* MistakenForMurderer: [[http://notalwaysright.com/something-smells-fishy-part-2-2/17685 "STOP KILLING ALL THE FISHES!"]]
* MistakenForPregnant: [[http://notalwaysright.com/digging-your-way-out-of-a-hole-part-4/938 The (kind of) nice version.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/born-to-offend/802 The mean version.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/belly-rubbed-and-snubbed/24617 "Im fat, not pregnant, lady."]]
* MistakenForServant:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/less-dress-codes-more-codes-of-conduct/3831 here]], [[http://notalwaysright.com/fun-with-mistaken-identities/598 here]], and [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-funny-pharm-acy/3556 here]], and one particularly cute one [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-accepting-cash-checks-and-cheez-its/3051 here]].
** And an example of mistaken for [[http://notalwaysright.com/part-time-customer-full-time-cavity-crusader/2527 customer]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-twilight-of-our-literacy-part-10/21919 apparently knowing anything about a popular book series means you work at the bookstore.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/harry-potter-and-the-disorder-of-the-forks-flicks/21858 This angry customer]] mistakes another customer for a worker, and it [[FromBadToWorse rapidly gets worse]] when the other customer [[CassandraTruth tries to point out the first customer's mistake]].
** Anything with the title "I Don't Work Here, Does Not Work Here". It's up to [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-dont-work-here-does-not-work-here-part-11/31066 Part 11]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-do-work-here-does-not-work-here-2/33482 Inverted here:]] Even though the submitter is wearing a uniform, the customer refuses to believe they actually work there and aren't just using an elaborate method to cut in line.
* MistakenNationality: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-the-sharpest-bigot/24910 One manager]] tells a racist customer that she is not Mexican, she is Romani, and if he's going to be racist he should learn the difference. This is [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome as he's being dragged away by the police]], after she managed to intimidate him when he tried to do the same to her.
* {{Mondegreen}}: [[http://notalwaysright.com/foretelling-will-be-the-death-of-you/31016 Chronicle of the Death of Four Toads.]]
* MoodWhiplash: Among the hilarious mishaps of service workers, the sad ones really stand out. Case in point: [[http://notalwaysright.com/would-you-like-a-foot-to-go-with-your-mouth/2051 Would You Like A Foot To Go With Your Mouth]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/uk-is-ok/27136 This]] entry goes from normal put-the-customers-in-their-place, to heartwarming I-apologize-for-their-behaviour, to outright funny.
* MoodSwinger: Thanks for helping me... I'll kill you! [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-mood-swings-attack-part-2/522 Here]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-mood-swings-attack/311 here]]. Also [[http://notalwaysright.com/every-cloud-has-a-savior-lining/22735 here]].
* MotorMouth: Sometimes the best way to handle them is to [[http://notalwaysright.com/all-hail-wikipedia/869 give them a taste of their own medicine]]. (With a little help from TheOtherWiki, of course.)
* MummiesAtTheDinnerTable: Appears to be what [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-guys-are-made-of-the-right-stuff/5981 this woman]] is up to.
* MuggingTheMonster: Several examples.
** Mugging The Gun Shop Owner: Some people are indeed stupid enough to make violent threats toward the manager of a gun store. Those people, thankfully, are ''not'' TooDumbToLive and flee when they see [[http://notalwaysright.com/do-not-mix-empty-threats-loaded-barrels/2087 the manager walk out with a shotgun on his shoulder]].
** In a milder example of this kind of trope, there's also a few examples of what we can call Mugging The Human Resources Manager, wherein an applicant for a job barges into the place and starts rudely throwing their weight around, only to discover that the staff member they've been treating poorly is actually someone they should have probably been a bit more polite towards if they want to stand a chance of getting the job. Such as [[http://notalwaysright.com/application-confrontation/10602 this person]] or [[http://notalwaysright.com/inter-screwed/8762 this genius]]. In an oblique version of this, [[http://notalwaysright.com/application-confrontation-part-2/11757 Mugging the Target Audience]].
** Alternately, threatening that you're going to complain to the manager when that's who you're talking to.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/navy-seals-fate-is-sealed/8575 This]] naval lieutenant decides to throw his weight around in a civilian restaurant and makes the mistake of antagonizing another diner... who happens to be a Rear Admiral stationed at the same base.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/hard-drugs-and-harder-pharmacists/2424 Perhaps the straightest example yet.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/r-e-s-p-e-c-t/22119 R-E-S-P-E-C-T]]: Sometimes, a reputation as a "man-beater"[[note]]Earned by the lady in question defending herself against a former co-worker, and sending him to the hospital[[/note]] can be useful when dealing with certain problematic customers.
** In an example overlapping with BullyingADragon, [[http://notalwaysright.com/admitting-defeat-was-an-easy-thing-touche/25319 this robber]] made the mistake of trying to rob a bookstore owner who also happened to be a champion fencer. He remained unitimidated when the owner pointed that out (still MuggingTheMonster at this point) and even when the owner drew a [[SwordCane sword from his cane]] (''this'' is the BullyingADragon part). It isn't until the owner flicked his glasses off that he wisely chose to surrender.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-the-sharpest-bigot/24910 This guy]] tries to threaten a Romani manager with a knife. She's... [[KnifeNut unimpressed]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-karate-kid-christmas-special/26311 A big six-foot-tall man vs. a nine-year-old kid.]] Turns out the kid [[IKnowKarate knows karate]].
** A lighthearted example [[http://notalwaysright.com/he-has-been-governated/24928 here]]. A student cuts in front of a man in a lunch line. When the man points this out, the student starts throwing their weight around, claiming to be someone important, and asks the man who he thinks he is. The man then says that he's the Governor of the state.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-make-a-mockery-of-muggery/28860 An almost literal, albeit offscreen, example.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/five-feet-of-fury/29198 This man]] tries to takes some training pads from a small woman, because he clearly needed them more and because of those reasons had no need to be polite. Too bad he underestimated her ability and got himself pinned and humiliated.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-nurses-should-rule-the-world-part-5/31268 This father]] of a young boy in the hospital (falsely) accuses a teenage patient (who can't speak above a whisper due to mono) of gossiping about his son, and threatens physical violence against her. Too bad for him she's the daughter of the head nurse for that floor of the hospital.
* MustHaveCaffeine: [[http://notalwaysright.com/victim-of-a-crazy-mugging/28021 This woman]] needs coffee so much that she's willing to break into the staff break room and tear the place apart for some.
** also a disproportionate number of entries under ItsAllAboutMe and {{Jerkass}} involve somebody trying to get coffee and ignoring basic decency and respect in the process.
* MyBelovedSmother: [[http://notalwaysright.com/you-and-me-could-write-a-bipartisan-romance/8433 Really? REALLY?]] Trying to stop your 28-year-old daughter from going on a date?
-->'''Mother:''' You don't understand... [[FelonyMisdemeanor he's a Democrat!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/sigh-they-grow-up-so-slow/2425 Or this one]], who doesn't seem to grasp that her son's a grown man.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:N]]
* NakedPeopleAreFunny: [[http://notalwaysright.com/bull-in-a-china-shop/737 Except when armed with]] [[GuitarHero plastic guitars.]] Well, okay, they're still funny, but also painful.
* NamedLikeMyName: [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-youve-been-shawshanked/26012 A young Caucasian woman named]] MorganFreeman. Her customers [[TheyJustDontGetIt can't seem to grasp that she's not actually claiming to be the actor]], and eventually refuse to do business with her because of this "dishonesty".
* NamesTheSame: [[http://notalwaysright.com/drugs-can-make-you-see-things/31605 This surreal incident.]]
* NeatFreak: [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-selling-the-war-on-germs-aisle-5/12304 Sometimes]] get emphasized on "freak".
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/at-least-she-brought-windows-cleaner/21490 "See?!]] No viruses!"
* NeverMessWithGranny: [[http://notalwaysright.com/28-years-later/10119 Do you carry flamethrowers?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/never-again/24887 This old lady]] routs a bunch of punks picking fights over their tattoos, by showing everyone ''her'' tattoo... from the concentration camps.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/grannies-gotta-love-em/1168 Granny trumps mom]] in dealing with a misbehaving little boy.
* NeverMyFault: It turns out that people will blame ''anyone'' and ''anything'' (and we mean '''''anything''''') rather than a simple "Oops, sorry there, I seem to have misunderstood/made a mistake, etc."
** The end of [[http://notalwaysright.com/totally-trashed-the-place/32527 this story]] [[LampshadeHanging aptly sums it up:]]
--> "Welcome to customer service, where everything is your fault and the reason doesn't matter."
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/driving-miss-crazy-part-2/3546 A particularly]] FacePalm-worthy one.
** The aptly-titled [[http://notalwaysright.com/its-your-fault-that-its-my-fault/1207 It's your fault that it's my fault]].
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/size-matters-part-6/17127 Oh, you made it small? When I said small, I meant big! I thought you would understand.]]"
* NeverSayDie: [[http://notalwaysright.com/bad-parents-bug-us/20630 "KILL?! How dare you say that in front of my children?! You are damaging them for life!"]]. This was the parent's reaction to the employee saying that her kids were going to wind up killing the exhibit's butterflies.
* NewMediaAreEvil: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ten-doctors-versus-the-ten-commandments/32019 This customer]] asks a ''Series/DoctorWho'' fan to stop watching the show because her church says "it's evil" and wants people to "support gay marriage and be an Atheist". Needless to say, she gets kicked out.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ten-doctors-versus-the-ten-commandments-part-2/32724 A later entry]], also involving ''Doctor Who'', starts out very similarly... But then the customer comes back to apologize, and admits she just has a negative reaction to the show because she was a fan growing up, but her parents refused to let her watch it, saying it was against their religion. The submitter responds by recommending her a memorabilia shop that could help her catch up on the 30 years of the show she's missed.
* NiceToTheWaiter: '''[[InvertedTrope Inverted]]''' by [[http://notalwaysright.com/revenge-is-a-treat-best-served-sweet-part-2/21708 this parent.]] "Ugh! He's not supposed to be polite to people on minimum wage!" Played straight by the child, though, who [[KarmicJackpot gets rewarded for his politeness]].
** The "[[http://notalwaysright.com/category/awesome-customers/ Awesome Customers]]" tag is explicitly for this kind of thing, since it's generally an exception.
* {{Ninja}}: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-house-elves-are-on-strike/13937 Someone heard about "mall ninja"]], but took the term too literally.
* NinjaPirateZombieRobot: [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-swim-where-the-sun-doesnt-shine/6741 "I'm a vampire mermaid! Gaaargh!"]]
* NoAnimalsWereHarmed: [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-political-causes-collide/1794 ...during the building of this table.]]
* NobodyHereButUsBirds: And they buy ''[[http://notalwaysright.com/bird-brained-part-6/6853 bird seed]]'', at that. [[OurWerebeastsAreDifferent Wereravens]] or [[RaisedByWolves raised by a flock]] -- take your pick.
* NobodyOver50IsGay: Averted [[http://notalwaysright.com/uk-is-ok/27136 here]], at the end.
* NoExceptYes: All the time. Frequently literal variations, such as a [[http://notalwaysright.com/cant-spell-without-without-with/14160 bacon cheeseburger with no bacon]], but not a cheeseburger which becomes the same bacon cheeseburger upon adding, you guessed that, bacon.
** Subverted in [[http://notalwaysright.com/to-bacon-or-not-to-bacon-that-is-the-digestion/21412 this example]].
** Another subversion: [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-are-tea-total-part-2/28075 An iced coffee without the coffee]] is ''not'' milk and ice, but milk, ice, and ''tea''.
* NoGuyWantsAnAmazon: [[http://notalwaysright.com/taking-stupidity-to-new-heights-part-2/22450 This customer seems to think so.]]
* NoHeroDiscount: A customer learns this in [[http://notalwaysright.com/with-great-retail-power/2528 With Great Retail Power]].
* NoIndoorVoice: [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-bus-drivers-should-rule-the-world/6166 And it even got her thrown off the bus.]]
* NoPronunciationGuide:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-hollow-victory/28069 I'm looking for a game called]] [[{{Halo}} Hollow.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/translation-kollaboration/31252 This foreigner]] taught himself English mostly by reading it, but ran headlong into this trope in the process.
* NoSenseOfDirection: [[http://notalwaysright.com/directionally-challenged/911 This fellow]] who doesn't seem to understand the concept of next door.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/for-the-love-of-god-get-gps/1096 This one]] seems to have trouble following directions. At least the guy's got a sense of humor about it.
* NoTrueScotsman: [[http://notalwaysright.com/customer-service-with-zeal/6067 Or should we say, No True New Zilander?]]
* NoodleImplements: [[http://notalwaysright.com/recipe-for-an-interesting-evening/1748 Ping-pong balls and Vaseline]]? That can't be good. Try searching for "ping-pong balls" on the NoodleImplements page and you'll see what I mean.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-can-not-end-well-part-2/1771 These two items in conjunction cannot lead to anything good]].
* NoodleIncident: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-secret-lives-of-customers/2061 Butter... inside a cellphone?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/elmer-fudd-calling-on-line-one/2511 Rabbit blood???]]
*** How do you expect [[EverymanHYBRID HABIT]] to update his Twitter if his phone doesn't work?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/hulk-smash-bagels/1550 No, not the bagels!]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/ex-box/9624 Do XBox 360s come with cup holders?]]"
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/if-it-looks-like-a-cow-and-moos-like-a-cow/12595 Due to difficulties returning from a petting zoo, my mother and I had a 3 month old calf riding in the front seat of our truck.]]
* NotAMorningPerson: [[http://notalwaysright.com/misery-demands-company-part-3/15810 This lady.]]
* NotGrowingUpSucks: [[http://notalwaysright.com/being-ageless-gets-old/24106 This poor guy does not even bother with his ID anymore.]]
* NotSoAboveItAll: [[http://notalwaysright.com/theres-something-in-those-poppy-seeds/24258 A boss that normally advocates "professional" behavior shelves it in favor of "good customer relations".]]
* NotWithTheSafetyOnYouWont: [[http://notalwaysright.com/drinking-shooters-all-night-long/29886 This cashier]] pulls the trope on a drunk wielding an airsoft gun.
* NumberOfTheBeast: A few accounts of superstitious customers trying to avoid paying $6.66, or getting $6.66 in change.
* NWordPrivileges: Taken to a(n il)logical conclusion [[http://notalwaysright.com/checking-him-in-and-checking-her-out/32723 here]]: apparently, having [[BarackObama a black President]] means this customer can shout vulgarities and sexually harass women without consequence.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:O]]
* ObfuscatingDisability: [[http://notalwaysright.com/making-a-spectacle-of-herself/28379 Assumed by this customer]]. [[SubvertedTrope She was wrong.]]
* ObnoxiousInLaws: [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-dogged-sense-of-humor/14870 He doesn't exactly call them...]]
* OhCrap: [[http://notalwaysright.com/mama-puts-a-stammer-in-your-swagger/25487 "All the color drains from his face. He manages to squeak out some words: 'Hi Mama.'"]]
* {{Omniglot}}: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-blind-leading-the-blind/942 This man]], even when he [[CrowningMomentOfFunny has no idea what language they're speaking.]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/se-habla-japanol/9879 Se Habla Japanol]]".
** To understand the conversation and tell the (hilarious) story, [[http://notalwaysright.com/english-and-polish-and-french-oh-my/11738 this person]] had to understand English, Polish, ''and'' French ([[TitleDrop oh, my]]!)
* OlderThanTheyLook:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/being-ageless-gets-old/24106 One story]] features a 33-year-old customer who looks like a teenager, trying to buy an M-rated game.
--->'''Customer:''' "[...] I even quit drinking because its too much of a hassle to buy beer!"
** It's the case for [[http://notalwaysright.com/fine-art-comes-with-age/29225 this caricaturist]].
* OneSideOfTheStory:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/direction-deflection/28738 This mall-goer]] asks a kiosk employee for the location of the post office. The employee begins to say that it's inside a camera store, but the mall-goer assumes that the employee is trying to drum up business for the camera store and [[RapidFireInterrupting repeatedly cuts off the employee]] before they can complete their directions. When they finally manage to explain the whole thing, the mall-goer berates the employee for not being clear.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/only-drunk-on-victory/28598 This man]] assumes that a grocery store employee is tired because she was partying too hard and that it's entirely her fault for being tired. [[RapidFireInterrupting He doesn't let her speak]] until he's finished ranting, at which point the employee explains that she's tired because she was working overnight and usually didn't do so. To the man's credit, he realized his place, apologized, and walked away.
** During a prom, [[http://notalwaysright.com/no-proof-in-purchase/27859 a teacher]] accuses a dry bar of selling alcohol to minors, but it isn't too long until the bartender manages to get in that the beer the teacher took was non-alcoholic, and there was no actual alcoholic drinks anywhere near the bar. At least the teacher gave the bottle back.
* OperatorFromIndia: A few stories involve call center employees being ''mistaken'' for this (or something similar) when they're actually from the ''same country'' as the caller.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/indiscriminate-discrimi-nation/20357 "I want to talk to an American! I dont want to talk to someone in India."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/indiscriminate-discrimi-nation-part-2/24603 "Your accent is appalling! I hate talking to you Asians!"]]
* OracularUrchin: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-matrix-rejected/853 Um... this woman]] seems to think her child has supernatural powers and requests a credit card transaction be canceled just because the child said the card was unlucky. And she was right, in a SelfFulfillingProphecy sorta way. Making the purchase and ''then'' asking instead of the other way around, ''then'' being too unreasonable to do the paperwork to undo the purchase - meaning it stands, even though the customer stormed off and didn't get the service, means a significant amount of money was wasted. So in the end the kid was right, though it was less the fault of the card and more the fault of the stupidity.
* OrgasmicallyDelicious: [[http://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-pow-in-kung-pao/2203 Mmm, oh yeah, kung pao chicken!]]
* OurVampiresAreDifferent: [[http://notalwaysright.com/more-daylight-less-twilight-part-7/17358 Here's one Twilight fan that doesn't know about this trope.]]
* OverlyLongGag:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-cows-order-coffee/286 I know that! That is a SMALL coffee with 11 MILKS!]]
** The [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-25/33138 "This Is Why We're In a Recession" series]], in ''double-digit'' numbers, with no signs of stopping.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/theres-something-in-those-poppy-seeds/24258 BAGEL BAGEL BAGEL BAGEL BAGEL!]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:P]]
* PapaWolf: [[http://notalwaysright.com/let-me-give-you-a-pizza-my-mind/10035 This guy.]]
* PaperThinDisguise: [[http://notalwaysright.com/devil-in-disguise/5221 This lady]] not only falls for one, she points out something different that ''wasn't even changed''.
* PanickyExpectantFather: Inverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/contractions-speak-louder-than-words-part-3/12085 here]], where the guy is ''not'' going to let the fact that his wife is visibly in labor and ready to drop stop him from arguing over a discount on a duffel bag. And the worse thing is the bag has nothing to do with the pregnancy; he needs it for a trip ''the next week''.
* ParkingPayback: While there's nothing over-the-top, some jerks who decide to disregard parking etiquette do get their comeuppance.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/two-rows-dont-make-a-right/23579 This jerk]] who parks in not one, but ''two'' handicapped spaces gets ticketed in the end.
** In [[http://notalwaysright.com/capable-of-handicapping-the-capable/32138 this story]], a young man cuts off another woman who was going to park in a handicapped spot, with his car that has nothing indicating that he's allowed to do so. The woman gets her payback when she sees the man and confronts him, and lets him see that she's very old. The man then offers to help her into the store.
* ThePasswordIsAlwaysSwordfish: [[http://notalwaysright.com/getting-to-the-out-source-of-the-matter/9983 In some cases, "Swordfish" would be a major improvement]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dont-pin-your-hopes-on-this-one/4648 Oops.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/pinheaded/278 O-o-ops]].
* PekingDuckChristmas: [[http://notalwaysright.com/one-good-takeout-deserves-another/15583 Inverted]].
* PeripheryDemographic:[[invoked]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/opposite-sex-men/10374 "Bu-But, youre old. And a girl!]]
* PersonaNonGrata: Many of the stories end with the unruly customer banned from the store. A few stories even deal with customers that are/were banned.
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/inexcretable-behavior/11505 Yeah, I'd say you're still barred]]".
* PerspectiveFlip: Of a sort; [[http://notalwaysright.com/precarious-insurance-part-3/9096 this]] one is a customer submitting their own ditz moment.
** "Not Always Working" is one for "Not Always Right," in a meta sense.
* PhlebotinumHandlingEquipment: Inverted. [[http://notalwaysright.com/save-it-on-a-flesh-drive/28231 Save It On A Flesh Drive]] mentions inability to use a capacitive touch screen while wearing gloves.
* PigInAPoke: [[http://notalwaysright.com/like-his-pond-his-argument-is-shallow/29765 This]] guy gets ripped off by (unknowingly) buying a much older pond pump than his last one from some guy on the Internet. He tries to get a refund from the pump company itself. It doesn't work.
* PintsizedPowerhouse: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-karate-kid-christmas-special/26311 This kid.]] [[BondOneLiner "I'll let you know what my sister thinks of the toy!"]]
* PlatonicProstitution: [[http://notalwaysright.com/fortunately-for-us-both-i-like-crazy/22447 This guy calls a phone sex line...]] and ends up talking about video games.
* PoesLaw: Exactly how many of the stories are genuine, how many are exaggerated/embellished versions of real events, and how many are actually pure bullshit made by trolls or somebody with an axe to grind?
* PointAndLaughShow
* PolitenessJudo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/courage-under-hire/22826 Used successfully here]]. It helps that the [[StupidCrooks crook was dumb]] and the cashier [[AchievementsInIgnorance didn't realize he was in danger]] [[DelayedReaction until afterwards]].
* PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/fowl-mouthed-accusations/2327 "Peacock"]] is a dirty word and you should be ashamed! I prefer you use the term "pearooster".
** Also, [[http://notalwaysright.com/fighting-ignorance-with-ignorance/9967 we don't say "Indian"]]. And [[http://notalwaysright.com/darkest-africa/6585 a map of Africa]] is disturbing.
** Inverted in another story. The store tries to be a little politically correct, selling "holiday trees", but apparently the customer wants a Christmas tree, and so will go to a store that "[[http://notalwaysright.com/please-call-customer-dis-service/3573 isn't afraid of offending people!]]"
** Another customer takes racial colors [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-dark-day-for-political-correctness/11827 a bit too seriously]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/teaching-a-righteous-dimwit-is-stressful/23028 This worker]] had to stop wearing her custom-made [[Series/DoctorWho TARDIS]] bracelet to work because a willfully ignorant customer believed it to be slang for "retard".
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-grinch-comes-earlier-every-year/25589 Well, that was rude! Its Happy Holidays. Saying Thanksgiving is politically incorrect! Stupid girl!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/so-slow-it-hertz-part-2/30892 "Everyone knows 'slow' is not politically correct! Your computer is 'mentally impared'!"]]
* PornStash: A external drive a guy brings into a shop has [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-tech-support-needs-hazard-pay/16341 500GB worth]] on it.
** He then proceeds to buy 4 more 16 GB flash drives.
* PottyEmergency: [[http://notalwaysright.com/try-calling-nine-one-number-two/9532 One person takes the concept a bit too literally.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/urine-her-way/24264 And another takes a more... uh, "proactive" approach.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/making-a-loud-a-pee-l/26502 In this case]], it's not clear whether the unfortunate result falls under PottyFailure or BringMyBrownPants. Perhaps both?
* PrecedentExcuse: [[http://notalwaysright.com/wine-spirits-of-camraderie/13510 This]] story has a drunk bar patron try to excuse their friend's drunkenness by arguing they're more drunk than them, thus getting them both thrown out.
-->'''Patron's friend:''' "Why are you kicking her out? I'm drunker than she is!"\\
'''[Anecdote Giver]:''' "Then you can leave, too!"
* PrecociousCrush: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/young-boys-love-player-time/28261 If there's a sandwich named after you, I would so eat it!]]"
* PrettyFlyForAWhiteGuy:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-to-scam-a-scammer-part-5/467 ... It's because I'm black, isn't it?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/wesley-called-he-wants-his-tan-back/663 Look, I just want to be as dark as that guy so I can learn how to rap.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/little-red-riding-in-the-hood/567 Pretty fly for a little white girl.]]
** Inverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-always-right-on-so-many-levels/921 here]]--a white guy ''not'' trying to be black is called a n***** by a RacistGrandma who's pretending to have a disability. It gets worse from there.
* PsychopathicManchild: A sizeable proportion of the customers.
* PunctuatedForEmphasis: Parody of the former TropeNamer [[http://notalwaysright.com/paging-leonidas-to-the-front-desk/1218 here]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/no-one-ever-said-it-would-be-boring/1832 here]]; these also fit the normal definition of the trope. The title of [[http://notalwaysright.com/thisisspyware/1371 this one]], also a reference to ''Film/ThreeHundred'', fits as well.
** And a more straightforward one: [[http://notalwaysright.com/stir-yes-sir/3188 "Medium! Coffee! Two! Equal!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/for-the-love-of-god-get-gps-part-2/5345 I'm! In! Canada!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/fresh-until-proven-spoiled/13487 SMELL MY HAM.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/he-is-not-a-mew-sed/29080 HE. IS. A. MAN. CAT!]]
* PunnyName: Meet [[http://notalwaysright.com/youre-welcome-custer-mer/22605 Clara Fication]].
* PuppyLove: [[http://notalwaysright.com/patience-is-priceless/18903 A boy who barely reaches the counter has been saving for his girlfriend's present]].
* PyrrhicVictory: A [[http://notalwaysright.com/guess-whose-picture-is-next-to-pyrrhic/787 few]] examples [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-pyrhhic-victory/138 crop up]] now and then for [[http://notalwaysright.com/it-pays-to-be-correct/18664 customers]] who put pride first.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:R]]
* RacistGrandma: [[http://notalwaysright.com/america-land-of-the-delusional/15341 It comes with]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-war-unwon/14873 the territory]]. One man somehow finds a way to be [[http://notalwaysright.com/judge-me-by-the-content-of-my-crustaceans/18543 racist about shrimp]].
* RapidFireInterrupting: [[http://notalwaysright.com/found-out-his-pecking-order/30042 It happens here]]. A customer calls a pet store and demands that they fix an order of chicks, constantly cutting the employee off and assuming that they were being lazy. To the customer's credit, once he realized that he called the wrong pet store, he promptly hung up.
* RapidFireNo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/having-funion-with-food/13147 This customer]] ''really'' doesn't like onions.
* ReadTheFreakingManual: [[http://notalwaysright.com/parental-guidance/29056 "Youre making fun of me for not reading directions, arent you?" "Kind of."]]
* RealityIsUnrealistic: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-conversation-has-taken-a-sudden-dive/9175 No, I don't think NASA will give you a 5-minute skydive either.]]
** A few entries are about women assuming that the employee's hair is fake (either in color or length) and refusing to believe the employee's hair is natural.
* ReallySevenHundredYearsOld: [[http://notalwaysright.com/elixirs-of-everlasting-life-are-on-aisle-5/3741 Or something...]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/there-can-be-only-one-insane-customer/1757 This guy seems to be well on his way.]]
* RealMenHateSugar: [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-to-show-up-a-show-off/17222 Not]] the case.
* RealWomenNeverWearDresses: [[http://notalwaysright.com/urine-way-over-your-head/558 Seems to be the thought behind this one]].
* TheReasonYouSuckSpeech: [[http://notalwaysright.com/taking-the-big-out-of-bigotry/24364 This customer's niece]] goes for this trope when the defensive approach proves ineffective. Along with any number of other examples when dealing with bigoted customers.
* RedScare: ''Way'' too many people seem to think this way. [[http://notalwaysright.com/in-soviet-america-product-buys-you/3373 e.g. this silly man.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-usually-compared/4547 And this one.]]
* ReflexiveResponse: [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-you-know-youve-been-working-too-long/10684 This one]].
* RefugeInAudacity: [[http://notalwaysright.com/perhaps-a-little-bit-too-free/212 A shining example.]]
** A rare aversion [[http://notalwaysright.com/blowing-things-out-and-up-of-proportion/23416 here.]] One has to wonder what the father was trying to accomplish with all the trouble.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-played-indeed/624 A well-played comeback to an inappropriate prank call.]]
* RescueRomance: A perfectly timed submission [[http://notalwaysright.com/domarry-the-one-you-love/30480 here]].
* RetailRiot: [[http://notalwaysright.com/coming-soon-to-not-always-right-a-zombie-apocalypse/16132 One comic strip]] showed "Why dealing with customers is worse than a Zombie Apocalypse". It states that "[[NoZombieCannibals Zombies will never attack each other]], even when supplies are scarce" while "Customers will attack each other, especially when supplies are scarce".
* RichInDollarsPoorInSense: [[http://notalwaysright.com/she-probably-needs-someone-to-put-her-clothes-on-too/265 "What is this, some sort of self service store?"]]
** Several of the stories on here are about extremely stubborn customers who will pay the price posted and '''''only''''' the price posted, no matter what sales or discounts are in effect despite not being advertised. It's like they're hardwired to believe that no matter what the store workers do, they're trying to rip them off.
*** [[http://notalwaysright.com/guess-whose-picture-is-next-to-pyrrhic/787 "I don't care how much it costs! Just do your job and give me my f**king milk for 29 dollars!"]] Also a PyrrhicVictory (thus the title).
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/needlessly-needy/20343 This upper class woman]] demanded money back for their kid's private school tuition because other people were going for cheaper. Her response after being told her kid didn't get any aid because her household made $170,000, and aid is usually given to those who make $20,000 or less a year? "You fucking liar! Nobody makes so little money!" Seems like the money has made her far too sheltered.
** Strange example [[http://notalwaysright.com/damaging-their-reliability/32909 here]]. A customer accidentally threw out a modem's power-supply, so she tries to scam the tech-support guy into giving her one for free. He'll only do it if it's broken, however. So, the customer breaks it. The tech-service guy refuses to give her one for free because he ''saw'' her break it. She then tries to bribe him, saying Ill pay you £30 to say you didnt see anything. The tech replies that a new one only costs £8 anyway. She then screams "Its not the amount; its the principle!" So, in the process of trying to get one for free, this customer is willing to pay more than three times the price of getting one legitimately? Okay, whatever, it's your money.
* RidiculouslyHumanRobots: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-facts-of-second-life/22306 Apparently]], some people think that store employees are these.
* RidiculousProcrastinator: [[http://notalwaysright.com/due-tonight-vs-do-tonight/17115 When is the paper due? Midnight.]]
* RightInFrontOfMe: [[http://notalwaysright.com/be-civil-to-the-civilians/31417 Two soldiers]] badmouth a civilian in front of their line over civilians shouldn't be allowed to shop at the on-base convenience store. Unfortunately, said "civilian" is actually their officer instructor who is not pleased. [[OhCrap Cue both soldiers turning pale and running out]]!
* RougeAnglesOfSatin: [[http://notalwaysright.com/spelling-gone-rogue/8515 "That's not how rogue is spelled!"]]
* RuleOfCute: [[http://notalwaysright.com/cute-but-not-astute/11271 This person thinks it applies to them.]]
* RuleOfThree: [[http://notalwaysright.com/pages-of-a-post-apocalyptic-persuasion/4390 This customer]] all but invokes it.
* RummageFail: [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-19/30215 This customer]] seems to have trouble finding the correct bills for a transaction. At least, that's what we ''hope'' is happening.
* RunningGag: Several entry titles come up over and over and over again, such as "This Is Why We're In A Recession, Part x" and "Literature/{{Twilight}} Of Our Literacy, Part Xx".
** On Not Always Romantic there is a ''very'' long running gag about zombies. They're all called "Till Undeath Do Us Part."
[[/folder]]

[[folder:S]]
* SadisticChoice: [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-picture-is-worth-a-thousand-woes/21598 So is it better to admit you stole the camera or that you use it to stalk underage girls?]]
* SarcasmFailure: [[LetMeGetThisStraight Describing the obviously-impossible task the customer has just requested in graphic detail]] ''might'' make it obvious that it can't (or won't) be done. But it seems to just as often meet with a reply of "Yes, yes, can you do that?" or "Exactly, why is that so hard to understand?"
* SaveGameLimits: See the ''Pokemon''-related example in "Socialization Bonus" below.
* ScaryBlackMan: A couple instances of InvokedTrope when dealing with racist customers, and another one that was {{Exploited|Trope}}.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/ironic-that-she-wants-a-race-car/30495 Dealing with a lady who refuses to buy a black doll.]]
** From the custserv desk: [[http://notalwaysright.com/addressed-the-race-issue/29739 Thank you. Oh, and before you go, you ought to know that Im the biggest, blackest mother-f***** youll ever meet in your life, and I know where you live. Good day.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/coffee-strong-and-proud/25295 Uh, no. The nice man behind the counter asked you to leave the store. I suggest you do so before I decide you need some help getting through the door.]]
** Never pull the racism card in front of [[http://notalwaysright.com/we-need-one-of-these-in-every-store-part-3/1033 this guy]].
* SchmuckBait: [[http://notalwaysright.com/putting-your-foot-in-it/3210 "Don't look at my feet."]]
* ScrewPolitenessImASenior:
** Invoked [[http://notalwaysright.com/have-age-will-complain/2189 here]].
** [[SkinshipGrope And]] [[DirtyOldMan also]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/aarp-membership-comes-with-a-few-hidden-perks/1000 here.]]
** And [[http://notalwaysright.com/her-slap-is-worse-than-her-bite/28221 here]]. Physically assaulting a person because they won't randomly do inane tasks for you? If you're old, that's A-OK!
** And [[http://notalwaysright.com/age-comes-before-rage/28616 here]], [[DefiedTrope only to get epically told where to put it]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/gramps-grumps/28451 This 80-year-old man]] acts mean because he can't do anything else.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/busted-part-2/29053 This man]] tries to bully/shame two teenagers into giving up their seats, but they (justifiably) refuse to cave, pointing out that the bus is ''nearly empty''.
* ScrewThisImOuttaHere: [[http://notalwaysright.com/getting-inside-the-meat-of-the-matter/27414 Did you just say someone was x-raying some meat?]] "I'm going on break."
* ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules: [[http://notalwaysright.com/in-line-and-out-of-line-part-2/33785 These abusive customers get thrown out of the store despite them being about to make a big purchase (over $1000 of merchandise).]]
* ScrewTheRulesIHaveConnections: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-quite-a-family-business/2529 Uh]], [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-a-latte-coupons/501 no]], [[http://notalwaysright.com/of-all-the-lies-to-tell/1047 you]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/lesson-1-how-to-scam-a-scammer/12 really]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-hiring-paramarketers/3727 don't]]. [[http://notalwaysright.com/outside-food-inside-job/32578 Here]] is a case where the actual manager was [[RightBehindMe right there at the time.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-like-it-not-hot/32582 Here's a customer]] who did have a connection, and abused it to get free food. Eventually, however, the store manager steps in, bans the customer, and suspends his connection (another manager) with no pay for a week.
** The final straw in [[http://notalwaysright.com/punch-drunk-and-love/31280 this]] HumiliationConga: not only does he ''not'' have connections, but the fellow customer whose removal he's asking for ''does''.
* ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney:
** See it [[http://notalwaysright.com/becoming-familiar-with-fiber/2073 here]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-hole-in-one/32216 A wealthy golf player hits a golf ball into another man's backyard]]. The golf player then proceeds to use the backyard as if it was part of the golf course. The owner of the backyard is angry with yet another rich jerk thinking he can just walk right on in like he owns the place. He gets fed up, so he bodily ''throws'' the golfer back onto the golf course. The golfer threatens to sue because he "paid good money", [[BrokenRecord as he reminds the owner every time he opens his mouth]]. The backyard owner says he'd like to see him try, countering with ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules.
-->'''Golfer''': Thats assault! I am calling the police on you! I paid good money!\\
'''Backyard Owner''': I dont give a d*** how much you paid; this is private property and according to the state penal code, I can remove you just like I did.\\
'''Golfer''': I'll sue! I paid good money!\\
'''Backyard Owner''': Go ahead; Ill be your lawyer.
* ScrewTheRulesImBeautiful: [[http://notalwaysright.com/snobbery-just-wont-cut-it/11953 "Beautiful people should have their hair done first!]] The ugly ones should wait!"
** "The ugly ones should waaaaaait!"
** There's also one story where a woman ''steals a pot full of coffee'' from a library because the librarian is apparently too ugly to have it. A florist then comes in and informs the librarian that the same woman just stole a bouquet of flowers from his shop for the same reason.
* ScrewYourself: [[http://notalwaysright.com/best-idea-ive-heard-all-day/1788 Best idea I've heard all day!]]
* SecretIdentity: [[http://notalwaysright.com/just-another-mild-mannered-horse/10310 For a unicorn]].
* SelfDeprecation: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-solemnest-guarantee/15766 This customer]].
* SeparatedByACommonLanguage: Somehow, [[http://notalwaysright.com/uk-is-ok/27136 this couple]] doesn't even recognize the employee ''is'' speaking English at first.
* SeriousBusiness: Sales, discounts, and refunds are '''serious motherfucking business'''. Attempts to dupe an employee into giving you one of these make up at least a third of the site.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/great-game-until-the-tornado-stole-home/2227 Who cares if there's an emergency, the game's on!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/jack-bauer-style-flowers/9949 "You're all a bunch of wimps! I risked my life getting here. I need to buy these petunias!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/contractions-speak-louder-than-words-part-3/12085 "We don't have time for that. My wife is in labor!"]] Also an example of HypocriticalHumor.
* ServileSnarker: A fair few employees.
* SexSells: Self-inflicted in "[[http://notalwaysright.com/talking-shirty/6685 Talking Shirty]]"
* ShapedLikeItself: [[http://notalwaysright.com/more-than-mildly-confused/4667 Here]]. [[http://notalwaysright.com/water-you-stupid-part-4/14754 Liquid drinks are made of liquid. That's what makes them drinkable.]]
** Unless it's too much like itself -- [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-problem-with-dirty-words/6397 dirt is too dirty]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/please-placebo-me/15128 salt is too salty]].
** And [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-cake-is-not-a-lie/24189 the cakes contain cake]].
* ShellShockedVeteran: [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-was-before-he-started-lobbing-cantaloupes/1010 Here.]]
* ShipperOnDeck: [[http://notalwaysright.com/abandon-all-mope-ye-who-enter-here/22590 This one]] was successful.
* ShuttingUpNow
* SillyWalk: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ministry-of-silly-walks/8583 "You walk like an employee."]] Followed by several attempts to walk like a customer.
* ASinisterClue: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-law-of-the-south-paw/2243 Um...]] no comment.
** Also [[http://notalwaysright.com/left-in-the-dark-ages/23437 here]].
* SkewedPriorities: Quite a few customers will, in the face of disaster or fierce weather, will demand service or wonder why nothing is working despite the immediate danger.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/jack-bauer-style-flowers/9949 This woman]] dodges falling glass for a bunch of flowers.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/demanding-to-a-fault/23396 This woman]] demands that a technician be sent to her house, which was in an earthquake zone. Even better is that she also left her house because of the earthquake. [[{{Hypocrite}} So she won't go to her house because it's unsafe, yet expects someone else to do the same]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/floods-cause-a-whole-raft-of-problems/10045 I don't care about floods! Where's my package?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/deal-with-the-burning-issue-first/6456 This customer]] wants her cat food. Who cares of the building burns down first?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-wind-in-the-windows/3273 This woman]] asks about her computer despite a tornado warning going off.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/water-you-stupid-part-10/21312 This woman]] wonders why no copiers are working, despite everything, herself included, being in ''ankle-deep water''.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-pot-calling-the-blizzard-white/14603 This customer]] complains about a package even though deliveries are delayed due to bad weather. When they were asked if they could go to a store, they said that they were snowed in. [[{{Hypocrite}} So they are mad that the delivery people aren't taking risks to the weather, while playing it safe themselves]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/your-complaints-are-on-thin-ice/16902 This person]] complains about having to walk an extra block due to an iced-over sidewalk. Thankfully, she got the point when someone else told her that a boy was injured walking across that sidewalk.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/we-are-a-precipitation-mall-nation/10653 This customer]] can't believe that a store is still open despite a snowstorm. As for them, they came out there to make a return.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/naturally-stupid-part-2/6256 A thunderstorm interfered with my television service?]] I still want my television service!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/driving-miss-crazy-part-2/3546 This woman]] insists on going down a closed road despite an officer telling her of the danger. She charges ahead anyway, crashes, and [[{{Hypocrite}} yells at the officer for not telling her]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/your-forecast-for-today-dark/1443 There's a hurricane?]] Forget that, where's my television service?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-dorothy-does-her-shopping/562 This woman]] braves a tornado to get to a store.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/customer-to-the-rescue/425 This man]] demands his photos, even if the roads are too dangerous due to ice storms!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/harping-on/27326 This man]] values his daughter's harp over his ''own life''. His wife doesn't.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/contractions-speak-louder-than-words-part-3/12085 This guy]] would rather argue over the price of a duffel bag than take his wife -- who is visibly in labor -- to hospital. [[{{Hypocrite}} And then has the nerve to accuse the employees of "trying to kill [his] wife over a duffel bag!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/needs-to-back-up-and-see-the-bigger-picture/28735 I don't have backups of my financial system]]? Screw that, how can I make these error messages go away so I don't have to hit Enter all the time?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-20/30354 £1.36 for some cauliflower?]] I can't afford that at all! I'll have some £5 lottery tickets instead!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/on-the-other-hand-she-seems-fine/30364 This woman]] will take advantage of discounted prices, broken finger be damned!
* SmallNameBigEgo:
** A few customers like to pull the [[http://notalwaysright.com/she-fought-the-law-and-the-law-won-part-2/17501 "don't you know who I am" card]] when refused service for any reason. Even in the ''very'' rare occasion [[http://notalwaysright.com/navy-seals-fate-is-sealed/8575 that they actually do hold some importance]], there's AlwaysABiggerFish to put them down.
** Some customers think that their buying something funds the employees' paychecks, and thus lets them get away with any behavior they desire. What they don't realize is that they're just one person out of many who buys things, and sometimes, [[http://notalwaysright.com/fun-with-idle-threats/640 they're not even directly responsible for the employees' paychecks]].
** Some customers like to boast about their large salaries and hold it over the "lowly" workers, like [[http://notalwaysright.com/networking-notworking/32122 here]]. Like making more money is somehow a valid reason to insult the people who are probably more skilled then them.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/her-chances-of-a-place-are-spoiled/32516 A specific case here]]: a woman who seems to think that she gets to set the rules at a daycare, even trying to force them to switch ''cleaning supplies'' based on her preferences, just because. Naturally, she's forced off the premises after swearing at an eleven-year-old boy for daring to try to uphold the daycare's actual rules.
** And then there's [[http://notalwaysright.com/hey-mr-dj-put-my-record-on/30023 this woman]], who is ''no'' name and ''all'' ego - and when someone else puts her in her place she tries to ''kill him''.
* SnipeHunt: Quests for things like [[http://notalwaysright.com/stupidity-can-go-either-way/1769 left-handed golf balls]], mostly self-inflicted.
** A straight example: a [[Film/BackToTheFuture flux capacitor]] for [[http://notalwaysright.com/someones-about-to-get-smacked-to-the-future/1698 son's Xbox]].
* SoapWithinAShow: [[http://notalwaysright.com/as-the-checkout-line-churns/2181 With the show being real life,]] that poor woman.
* SocializationBonus: The unavailability of starter VideoGame/{{Pokemon}} after starting a new game, combined with the limit of one save file per Game Card, leads to destructive behavior in "[[http://notalwaysright.com/gotta-catch-his-son/24609 Gotta Catch His Son]]".
* [[SomewhereThisIndexIsCrying Somewhere An English Teacher Is Crying]]: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-tenth-circle-is-stupidity/4723 "What the heck is a poem?!"]]
* SpeaksFluentAnimal: [[http://notalwaysright.com/he-is-not-a-mew-sed/29080 Well, this customer thinks he does anyway...]]
* SpellMyNameWithAnS: A man called [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-hello-pheven/1501 Pheven]] or maybe Stesen.
* SpoiledBrat: [[http://notalwaysright.com/daddy-doesnt-brat-an-eyelid/33348 One who seems to think]] that since daddy lets her have everything she wants, everyone else in the world has to, too. And "daddy" is all too eager to accuse anyone who doesn't agree of being terrible single mothers.
* SpoiledSweet: [[http://notalwaysright.com/judge-a-sandwich-on-its-filling/27816 With a heaping helping of]] MoreThanMeetsTheEye.
* StayInTheKitchen:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-land-of-milk-and-money/3239 A few]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-estrogen-empire-strikes-back/489 examples.]]
** Everyone in the office is female? [[http://notalwaysright.com/revenge-is-a-dish-best-served-by-wives/2317 This place is doomed!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/additional-charge-for-unlimited-sexism-plan/18212 Almost literally.]]
** [[StrawMisogynist This man]] would like to remind you that [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-accepting-immigrants-from-femmerica/17722 "women ain't 'Merican"]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/ready-aim-equality/18793 "Ain't no women in guns. Mens the only ones who can know anything 'bout my situation!"]]
** This is apparently [[http://notalwaysright.com/hung-up-on-gender/19156 this customer's]] train of thought, spending ''eight hours'' hanging up just because the person responding was female.
** UpToEleven: One man's philosophy seems to be to '''''[[DomesticAbuse beat women into submission]]''''' when they don't do what he wants. When [[http://notalwaysright.com/r-e-s-p-e-c-t/22119 this woman]] stands up to him, [[ImprovisedWeapon draw bar]] in hand, it completely freaks him out. Thanks to the cops conveniently choosing that moment to arrive, [[LaserGuidedKarma his history caught up with him.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/man-up-and-let-a-woman-fix-it-part-2/24421 This man]] refuses to believe that a female tech support worker actually helped him, and decides that there was some man who told her what to say instead, despite the worker and the supervisor saying otherwise.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/supportive-of-technical-support/25521 Inverted in this case]]. This man encounters a female tech support worker; since he doesn't encounter them very often, and this is a stereotypically "male" occupation, he decides she ''must'' be good at her job. Whenever he calls in the future, he requests to speak with her specifically.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-painting-a-pretty-picture-of-himself-part-2/32371 This customer]] says the phrase while demonstrating his bigotry.
* StealingFromTheHotel: There's a story where the [[http://notalwaysright.com/thievers-cant-be-choosers/1399 guy ''complains'' about the towels he stole to hotel management]] (by phone, a while after he'd stayed there).
* StealthInsult: [[http://notalwaysright.com/dinosaur-brained/26949 "Maam, you clearly are just as intelligent as you present yourself to be."]] [[ComicallyMissingThePoint "Well, Im glad you realise it."]]
* StealthParody: It can be very difficult to tell whether some of these people are genuinely crazy or just real-life {{troll}}s.
* TheStoner: [[http://notalwaysright.com/as-opposed-to-the-ones-that-you-can-like-smoke/180 This customer]] is either this or a ValleyGirl.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dude-that-must-be-some-strong-weed-part-2/182 "Ah, no man, I need my money to get my weed."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/weeding-out-the-dumb-ones-2/17690 I see kayaks in the kayak room!]]
* StopHavingFunGuys:[[invoked]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/misery-demands-company/13293 This guy practically says the trope by name]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/rpg-really-pretentious-gamer/30608 This customer]] accosts another for buying a ''Halo'' game.
* StraightGay: [[http://notalwaysright.com/stereo-griping/7735 This guy]] seriously regrets coming out to a female friend who doesn't seem to understand this trope.
* StrawVegetarian: [[http://notalwaysright.com/as-long-as-its-a-tofu-hat/20429 Occasionally]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/ruining-it-for-everyone/15807 and]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/man-cannot-live-by-water-alone/1401 unfortunately]].
* StupidGood: [[http://notalwaysright.com/generosity-that-knows-no-bounds-or-much-of-anything-else/21780 "[The donation drive is] going on 'til September, but you know, you're allowed to say 'No' when we ask you." "No I'm not!"]]
* SunkCostFallacy: A lot of customers will continue on some very ''dumb'' courses not out of stupidity, but because they don't want to admit they're mistaken/wrong.
* SuperOCD: [[http://notalwaysright.com/belting-out-her-demands/26570 This customer]] seems to have a problem with the checkout's conveyor belt moving her items for her, to the point of a FreakOut.
* SureLetsGoWithThat: A common 'let's just get them the hell out of here' tactic once a customer's stupidity has gone too far.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/doe-is-dear/24560 Yes, maam. Thats exactly how it works.]]
* SuspiciouslySpecificDenial: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-fox-is-already-out-of-the-bag/4373 here]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/totally-lost-the-pot/9198 here]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/no-chance-of-defying-gravity/8750 I'm not stupid!]]
* SustainedMisunderstanding:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/time-to-close-the-books-on-this-one/22102 "Why is there a clothing store where your Short Hills store used to be?!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/parlez-vous-down-under/23904 "It means, 'I dont speak any French because Im not from France.'" "Oh, you! You French have such great senses of humor!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/their-mind-is-long-overdue/24088 This person]] accidentally calls a library, thinking they called a bank. After being corrected, they call again, mentioning bank business again.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-cake-is-a-lie-part-3/25165 Some people just don't understand the phrase "we doesn't sell cakes."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/racism-and-ignorance-go-hand-in-hand/28920 "[Having kids] at age twelve? You should be ashamed of yourself!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-dont-you-call-the-cops-on-em/1153 Police department?! I was calling Dr. ***s office! How DARE you answer his phone!]]
* StupidCrooks: Has a few stories about stupid criminals in its database. Like [[http://notalwaysright.com/spicing-up-the-dealer/29216 these guys]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:T]]
* TamponRun: [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-cashiers-should-rule-the-world/4230 Why Cashiers Should Rule the World]]. Bonus points for how the cashier handles the poor guy's heckler.
* TastesLikePurple:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-rainbow-of-flavor/1494 You should have told him it tastes like red.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/scented-for-an-electrifying-experience/13799 Electricity scented]].
* TautologicalTemplar: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-customer-is-not-always-righteous/23370 The Customer Is Not Always Righteous.]]
* TechnologyMarchesOn: [[http://notalwaysright.com/would-like-to-explain-but-they-havent-got-time/10616 "No. We should wait until next year, when they come out with the 4D [=TVs=]."]]
* TemptingFate: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/an-extra-shot-of-irony/26877 ...seriously, can you imagine if I was as stupid as him and spilled these!]]" ''[crash]'' "...I guess I deserved that."
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/lack-of-register-does-not-register/30520 This one has it]] with a side order of FailedASpotCheck.
* ThatCameOutWrong: Several stories have cases where a customer slips up in this manner.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/step-1-insert-foot-into-mouth/2250 "Oh, wow. I gotta watch how I phrase things."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/ill-go-where-hes-going/2204 Ten virgins, please.]]
** ''Hopefully'' [[http://notalwaysright.com/pray-theyre-talking-about-baby-goats/8526 this one]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-are-not-the-balls-you-are-looking-for/19208 Young man, do you have balls]]?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/buy-one-euphemism-get-the-second-one-free/17336 new jugs]]
** Someone calls a help desk and [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-networks-can-never-be-found/16795 refers to an 802.11g WLAN hotspot as a "G spot"]].
** The customer in [[http://notalwaysright.com/sure-thing-sweet-cheeks/18864 Sure Thing, Sweet Cheeks]] mentions a "rack"... of newspapers.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/time-for-cup-ples-counseling/23053 This customer]] wants to see the cup size... of a blender. Amusingly, he says this in the presence of ''his wife''.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/customer-service-stripped-bare/28694 "Strip down, facing me"]]
* ThatLiarLies: Too many times to count. Can't get your way at a store? Well then, they're obviously just lying in order to weasel out of doing any work, the lazy bastards!
* ThatsWhatSheSaid: [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-what-he-thought/7989 Turns up]] on [[http://notalwaysright.com/more-frisky-than-frail/782 occasion.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/pay-up-shot-down/10394 Can backfire]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/comically-bad-timing/3152 This one]] is a particularly ridiculous one.
** And it's best not to ask about [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-offend-o-bot-3000-strikes-again/2105 this one]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-what-she-said/1780 Check the title.]]
* TheyJustDontGetIt: Far too common.
** A perfect double example would be [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-cake-is-a-lie-part-3/25165 here]]: a woman enters a bakery and asks them to create a wedding cake and bill her for it, totally ignoring the submitter's insistence that they don't sell cakes or send bills out before she leaves; naturally, none of what she asks for is accomplished. She then begins sending attorneys to the bakery, apparently oblivious to the reason why they all immediately drop her case against the bakery, and ends up going through ''four'' of them, probably wasting thousands or even millions of dollars in the process, before she gives up (or, less charitably, before she gets enough of a bad rep amongst attorneys that they won't take her case).
** To summarize [[http://notalwaysright.com/terrified-of-baggage/28364 this story]], "Do I need bags for this vacuum?" "No you don't need bags." "Okay, but do I need bags?"
* ThirdPersonPerson: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-dark-chocolate-knight/20422 "The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?" "Yes. Yes, The Batman would."]]
* ThinkOfTheChildren:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/curiosity-kilt-the-peeping-tomcat/12847 This woman's]] excuse for banning kilts.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-customers-actually-give-a-jam/23895 This mother's]] reasoning for not stopping her kid from bumping a cart into an elderly lady ahead of them. The customer behind them thinks differently, and shows what might happen if the mother never disciplines her son.
* ThisExplainsSoMuch: The response when [[http://notalwaysright.com/kin-tell-a-lot-about-this-patient/23047 this customer]] admits he still lives with his mother.
* ThisIsForEmphasisBitch: [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-dont-work-here-does-not-work-here-part-5/26135 IN. MY. HOUSE. BITCH!]]
* ThisIsGonnaSuck: [[http://notalwaysright.com/indentured-shoe-vitude/10126 Shoes. Crap.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-bus-into-busy/26838 "60. Some adults, mostly kids." *she breathes deeply in and lets it out slowly with a whoosh* "Got it."]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/sanity-hanging-by-a-shoe-string/29420 Hello]], I need shoes for all seven of my children. They're each a different size, I'd like to purchase three pairs each, and can you make sure that all the shoes are different? My children dont want shoes that are like each other's. And hurry up, I don't have all day!
* ThrowTheBookAtThem: [[http://notalwaysright.com/harry-potter-and-the-disorder-of-the-forks-flicks/21858 This psycho customer]].
* TimeTravel: Enough that there's [[http://notalwaysright.com/weekend-roundup-time-travel/18646 Top-rated collection]] of these stories.
** There's definitely demand for [[http://notalwaysright.com/all-the-news-thats-fated-to-print/17368 future newspapers]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/maybe-if-you-watch-it-at-88-mph/17230 future/17230 TV shows]]. Also good for [[http://notalwaysright.com/pre-cog-movie-log/9496 sneaky scams]].
* TitleDrop: A surprising number of customers literally say "The customer is always right" as if it were some kind of magic spell that always makes it so.
** The saying "The customer is always right", when it is applicable, applies to business and business ONLY. Unfortunately, customers seem to think it applies to everything from religion to sexual orientation to opinions of any sort.
--->'''Customer''': I think that ''[Opinion A]''.\\
'''Worker''': That's fine. I happen to think that ''[Opinion B]''.\\
'''Customer''': Why? That's obviously wrong!\\
'''Worker''': Um, not really...\\
'''Customer''': Yes, it is! The customer is always right!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-always-indeed/20847 This one]] actually adds the "not always" to the mix.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/banking-is-a-whole-different-animal/33462 And this one]], where a customer tries to call a bank, gets a veterinarian office instead, and refuses to believe he had the wrong number ''because "I just gave you my account number"'', as if said number is the magic phrase that turns any place he calls into his bank.
** {{Inverted|Trope}} [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-price-is-right-the-customer-is-not/33773 here]]: a customer tries to price-match turkeys with a competitor, insisting on getting their price even though this store's prices are actually cheaper than said competitor's. The cashier does not fight this ''because'' of the "customer is always right" logic.
* TooDumbToLive:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/live-wires-are-stupid-magnets/13140 Are those wires live?]] {{BOFH}} may have been trying too hard.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/fiery-temperaments-can-lead-to-explosive-situations/24042 NOT the customer buying £250 worth of fireworks]], but the person nearby who ''stomps on said customer's fireworks''. Fireworks may be relatively inert without an external ignition source, but that ''doesn't'' make stomping on them a safe thing to do.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-caller-is-off-the-hook/11949 Possibly a literal example]], Driving, while talking on one cellphone, and configuring another, with hot coffee between her knees. She was t-boned by another car. No word on what happened after that.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-fuelish-thing-to-do/29698 This customer]] recommends starting a fire in a barrel for warmth in the middle of a gas station.
* TooMuchInformation:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/passing-it-forward/4296 "I've just had a horrible stomach ache all day, but I just farted and I feel much better!"]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/vegetable-innuendos/17098 I'm sorry you had to hear that.]]"
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/blind-to-the-tmi-boundary/31160 An odd juxtaposition]] of wanting to do something in private...while publicly announcing exactly what you're doing. And yes, the description does fall under this trope.
* TranslationConvention: Being an English-only site. Whether someone is speaking a language other than English will usually only be noted if, say, multiple languages are being spoken in the example.
* TranslationYes: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/not-open-to-interpretation/31617 Wow, he said]] [[NarrativeProfanityFilter all that]] in one little sentence?"
* TheTreacheryOfImages: [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-customer-is-literally-peanuts/10727 "A card? Well, you shouldn't say it's a plant then. It's misleading."]]
* TropesAreNotBad: Meet [[http://notalwaysright.com/hear-speak-say-play-no-evil/4179 the reasonable]] MoralGuardian.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-a-wrap-on-the-rap/12353 An even better one]].
* TwinThreesomeFantasy: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-quite-the-code-to-success/10258 ...encoded]].
[[/folder]]

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Website/NotAlwaysRightAToF | Website/NotAlwaysRightGToL | (you are here) | Website/NotAlwaysRightUToZ

[[Website/NotAlwaysRight Back to the main page]]
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[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:M]]
* MaamShock: [[http://notalwaysright.com/beauty-is-in-the-eye-of-the-bag-holder/8747 "Do I look old enough to be a ma'am?"]]
* MacGyvering: [[http://notalwaysright.com/lt-ripley-vs-the-wasp-queen/8007 No wasp spray?]] I'll just "DIY" a flamethrower.
* MachineWorship: [[http://notalwaysright.com/all-hail-lord-konica/1013 All hail Lord Konica!]]
* MajorInjuryUnderreaction: [[http://notalwaysright.com/it-almost-never-hurts-to-check/748 I guess this knife is sharp enough.]]
* {{Malaproper}}:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/may-we-suggest-the-covert-cauliflowers/1594 "You're running out of espionage."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/it-burns-when-i-download/1573 "I usually download my pictures in Chlamydia."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/miss-diagnosis/2570 "I think my son has Liza Minnelli!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/chinchilla-i-choose-you/7792 Chinchilla, I Choose You!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-films-are-just-sick/5913 Some Films Are Just Sick]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-horrors-of-mispronunciation-part-4/14876 So close, but]] let's not go here.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dangerously-cheesy/14267 Mad Cow Cheese]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/clothing-that-just-takes-control/17682 "Where can I leave my domination clothing?"]]
** Even the person reporting the story had no idea what [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-art-of-ignorance/15928 this art museum patron meant]].
** And subverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-meant-what-i-said-and-i-said-what-i-meant/14951 here]].
** In [[http://notalwaysright.com/get-the-correct-word-step-by-step/10195 two]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/you-got-the-wrongest-item-part-4/9504 instances]], these people say pedophile when they meant pedometer.
* MaleGaze:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/rare-flashes-of-intelligence/4436 Oh, about a B cup.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/north-of-the-moral-border/4097 This one]] as well.
* MamaBear:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-mother-goes-out-of-her-way-to-get-in-the-way/30612 A mother]] tells off another customer who almost rammed her child.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-nurses-should-rule-the-world-part-5/31268 This mother]] tells off a [[{{Jerkass}} very rude and hard-of-hearing hospital visitor]] who berates her daughter, and gets him thrown out of the hospital for his behavior.
* {{Masquerade}}: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/the-truth-is-waaay-out-there/17945 Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter]]" -- it's from the same guy who wrote "Inconvenient Truth".
* MathematiciansAnswer: [[http://notalwaysright.com/please-press-any-brain-cell-to-continue/3594 "Can I have your zip code, please?"]]
** Sadly subverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/enigmatic-espresso/2032 here]]. Assuming the false dilemma where none exists is not going to get you your... um, whatever you're ordering.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/at-least-this-customer-is-honest/38 Two for one.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/gluttony-or-gluttony/291 And God only knows what's going on here...]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/parts-laboring-the-obvious/18232 And this one.]]
** What does [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-that-narrows-it-down-part-3/22438 this patient]] remember about their doctor? "Its either a man or a woman."
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-that-narrows-it-down-part-2/11193 "What sort of work are you looking for?" "Outdoor work... and indoor work."]]
** What kind of bread does [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-that-narrows-it-down/1686 this man]] want for his beef brisket sandwich? "The square kind."
* MeddlingParents: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-all-re-cycling-is-good/5817 No, I generate enough of "crazy" on my own]]. Also, FelonyMisdemeanor.
** One slightly disturbed, as opposed to downright crazy, [[http://notalwaysright.com/bow-wow-bigotry/15124 here]].
* MeetCute: one [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-match-made-in-size-7/1490 example here]].
** Another one [[http://notalwaysright.com/on-the-straight-and-narrow-minded/2389 here]]; bonus points for the homophobe getting his comeuppance.
* MindScrew: A few entries, such as [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-secret-language-of-customers/3342 these]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/nothin-like-a-good-old-existential-meltdown/702 two]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/indecisively-incognito/14882 This guy.]] "You asked if you were speaking to John Smith, and I said yes. But I'm not telling you who I am. C'mon, I wanna do the survey."
* MissConception: [[http://notalwaysright.com/needs-to-get-their-education-straight/25149 This girl]] honestly believes that lesbians can't get pregnant. She declares that she is a lesbian herself, despite also declaring to have a sexual relationship with her boyfriend. [[InsaneTrollLogic So she can't possibly be pregnant, because she is a lesbian]], which she isn't.
* MisplacedWildlife:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/bird-brained-part-4/2444 Arctic]] penguins.
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/a-whale-of-a-story-2/22165 I assure you, maam, there is little danger of me actually harming a whale in Utah.]]"
* MistakenForMurderer: [[http://notalwaysright.com/something-smells-fishy-part-2-2/17685 "STOP KILLING ALL THE FISHES!"]]
* MistakenForPregnant: [[http://notalwaysright.com/digging-your-way-out-of-a-hole-part-4/938 The (kind of) nice version.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/born-to-offend/802 The mean version.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/belly-rubbed-and-snubbed/24617 "Im fat, not pregnant, lady."]]
* MistakenForServant:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/less-dress-codes-more-codes-of-conduct/3831 here]], [[http://notalwaysright.com/fun-with-mistaken-identities/598 here]], and [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-funny-pharm-acy/3556 here]], and one particularly cute one [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-accepting-cash-checks-and-cheez-its/3051 here]].
** And an example of mistaken for [[http://notalwaysright.com/part-time-customer-full-time-cavity-crusader/2527 customer]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-twilight-of-our-literacy-part-10/21919 apparently knowing anything about a popular book series means you work at the bookstore.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/harry-potter-and-the-disorder-of-the-forks-flicks/21858 This angry customer]] mistakes another customer for a worker, and it [[FromBadToWorse rapidly gets worse]] when the other customer [[CassandraTruth tries to point out the first customer's mistake]].
** Anything with the title "I Don't Work Here, Does Not Work Here". It's up to [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-dont-work-here-does-not-work-here-part-11/31066 Part 11]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-do-work-here-does-not-work-here-2/33482 Inverted here:]] Even though the submitter is wearing a uniform, the customer refuses to believe they actually work there and aren't just using an elaborate method to cut in line.
* MistakenNationality: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-the-sharpest-bigot/24910 One manager]] tells a racist customer that she is not Mexican, she is Romani, and if he's going to be racist he should learn the difference. This is [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome as he's being dragged away by the police]], after she managed to intimidate him when he tried to do the same to her.
* {{Mondegreen}}: [[http://notalwaysright.com/foretelling-will-be-the-death-of-you/31016 Chronicle of the Death of Four Toads.]]
* MoodWhiplash: Among the hilarious mishaps of service workers, the sad ones really stand out. Case in point: [[http://notalwaysright.com/would-you-like-a-foot-to-go-with-your-mouth/2051 Would You Like A Foot To Go With Your Mouth]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/uk-is-ok/27136 This]] entry goes from normal put-the-customers-in-their-place, to heartwarming I-apologize-for-their-behaviour, to outright funny.
* MoodSwinger: Thanks for helping me... I'll kill you! [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-mood-swings-attack-part-2/522 Here]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-mood-swings-attack/311 here]]. Also [[http://notalwaysright.com/every-cloud-has-a-savior-lining/22735 here]].
* MotorMouth: Sometimes the best way to handle them is to [[http://notalwaysright.com/all-hail-wikipedia/869 give them a taste of their own medicine]]. (With a little help from TheOtherWiki, of course.)
* MummiesAtTheDinnerTable: Appears to be what [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-guys-are-made-of-the-right-stuff/5981 this woman]] is up to.
* MuggingTheMonster: Several examples.
** Mugging The Gun Shop Owner: Some people are indeed stupid enough to make violent threats toward the manager of a gun store. Those people, thankfully, are ''not'' TooDumbToLive and flee when they see [[http://notalwaysright.com/do-not-mix-empty-threats-loaded-barrels/2087 the manager walk out with a shotgun on his shoulder]].
** In a milder example of this kind of trope, there's also a few examples of what we can call Mugging The Human Resources Manager, wherein an applicant for a job barges into the place and starts rudely throwing their weight around, only to discover that the staff member they've been treating poorly is actually someone they should have probably been a bit more polite towards if they want to stand a chance of getting the job. Such as [[http://notalwaysright.com/application-confrontation/10602 this person]] or [[http://notalwaysright.com/inter-screwed/8762 this genius]]. In an oblique version of this, [[http://notalwaysright.com/application-confrontation-part-2/11757 Mugging the Target Audience]].
** Alternately, threatening that you're going to complain to the manager when that's who you're talking to.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/navy-seals-fate-is-sealed/8575 This]] naval lieutenant decides to throw his weight around in a civilian restaurant and makes the mistake of antagonizing another diner... who happens to be a Rear Admiral stationed at the same base.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/hard-drugs-and-harder-pharmacists/2424 Perhaps the straightest example yet.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/r-e-s-p-e-c-t/22119 R-E-S-P-E-C-T]]: Sometimes, a reputation as a "man-beater"[[note]]Earned by the lady in question defending herself against a former co-worker, and sending him to the hospital[[/note]] can be useful when dealing with certain problematic customers.
** In an example overlapping with BullyingADragon, [[http://notalwaysright.com/admitting-defeat-was-an-easy-thing-touche/25319 this robber]] made the mistake of trying to rob a bookstore owner who also happened to be a champion fencer. He remained unitimidated when the owner pointed that out (still MuggingTheMonster at this point) and even when the owner drew a [[SwordCane sword from his cane]] (''this'' is the BullyingADragon part). It isn't until the owner flicked his glasses off that he wisely chose to surrender.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-the-sharpest-bigot/24910 This guy]] tries to threaten a Romani manager with a knife. She's... [[KnifeNut unimpressed]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-karate-kid-christmas-special/26311 A big six-foot-tall man vs. a nine-year-old kid.]] Turns out the kid [[IKnowKarate knows karate]].
** A lighthearted example [[http://notalwaysright.com/he-has-been-governated/24928 here]]. A student cuts in front of a man in a lunch line. When the man points this out, the student starts throwing their weight around, claiming to be someone important, and asks the man who he thinks he is. The man then says that he's the Governor of the state.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-make-a-mockery-of-muggery/28860 An almost literal, albeit offscreen, example.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/five-feet-of-fury/29198 This man]] tries to takes some training pads from a small woman, because he clearly needed them more and because of those reasons had no need to be polite. Too bad he underestimated her ability and got himself pinned and humiliated.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-nurses-should-rule-the-world-part-5/31268 This father]] of a young boy in the hospital (falsely) accuses a teenage patient (who can't speak above a whisper due to mono) of gossiping about his son, and threatens physical violence against her. Too bad for him she's the daughter of the head nurse for that floor of the hospital.
* MustHaveCaffeine: [[http://notalwaysright.com/victim-of-a-crazy-mugging/28021 This woman]] needs coffee so much that she's willing to break into the staff break room and tear the place apart for some.
** also a disproportionate number of entries under ItsAllAboutMe and {{Jerkass}} involve somebody trying to get coffee and ignoring basic decency and respect in the process.
* MyBelovedSmother: [[http://notalwaysright.com/you-and-me-could-write-a-bipartisan-romance/8433 Really? REALLY?]] Trying to stop your 28-year-old daughter from going on a date?
-->'''Mother:''' You don't understand... [[FelonyMisdemeanor he's a Democrat!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/sigh-they-grow-up-so-slow/2425 Or this one]], who doesn't seem to grasp that her son's a grown man.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:N]]
* NakedPeopleAreFunny: [[http://notalwaysright.com/bull-in-a-china-shop/737 Except when armed with]] [[GuitarHero plastic guitars.]] Well, okay, they're still funny, but also painful.
* NamedLikeMyName: [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-youve-been-shawshanked/26012 A young Caucasian woman named]] MorganFreeman. Her customers [[TheyJustDontGetIt can't seem to grasp that she's not actually claiming to be the actor]], and eventually refuse to do business with her because of this "dishonesty".
* NamesTheSame: [[http://notalwaysright.com/drugs-can-make-you-see-things/31605 This surreal incident.]]
* NeatFreak: [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-selling-the-war-on-germs-aisle-5/12304 Sometimes]] get emphasized on "freak".
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/at-least-she-brought-windows-cleaner/21490 "See?!]] No viruses!"
* NeverMessWithGranny: [[http://notalwaysright.com/28-years-later/10119 Do you carry flamethrowers?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/never-again/24887 This old lady]] routs a bunch of punks picking fights over their tattoos, by showing everyone ''her'' tattoo... from the concentration camps.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/grannies-gotta-love-em/1168 Granny trumps mom]] in dealing with a misbehaving little boy.
* NeverMyFault: It turns out that people will blame ''anyone'' and ''anything'' (and we mean '''''anything''''') rather than a simple "Oops, sorry there, I seem to have misunderstood/made a mistake, etc."
** The end of [[http://notalwaysright.com/totally-trashed-the-place/32527 this story]] [[LampshadeHanging aptly sums it up:]]
--> "Welcome to customer service, where everything is your fault and the reason doesn't matter."
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/driving-miss-crazy-part-2/3546 A particularly]] FacePalm-worthy one.
** The aptly-titled [[http://notalwaysright.com/its-your-fault-that-its-my-fault/1207 It's your fault that it's my fault]].
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/size-matters-part-6/17127 Oh, you made it small? When I said small, I meant big! I thought you would understand.]]"
* NeverSayDie: [[http://notalwaysright.com/bad-parents-bug-us/20630 "KILL?! How dare you say that in front of my children?! You are damaging them for life!"]]. This was the parent's reaction to the employee saying that her kids were going to wind up killing the exhibit's butterflies.
* NewMediaAreEvil: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ten-doctors-versus-the-ten-commandments/32019 This customer]] asks a ''Series/DoctorWho'' fan to stop watching the show because her church says "it's evil" and wants people to "support gay marriage and be an Atheist". Needless to say, she gets kicked out.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ten-doctors-versus-the-ten-commandments-part-2/32724 A later entry]], also involving ''Doctor Who'', starts out very similarly... But then the customer comes back to apologize, and admits she just has a negative reaction to the show because she was a fan growing up, but her parents refused to let her watch it, saying it was against their religion. The submitter responds by recommending her a memorabilia shop that could help her catch up on the 30 years of the show she's missed.
* NiceToTheWaiter: '''[[InvertedTrope Inverted]]''' by [[http://notalwaysright.com/revenge-is-a-treat-best-served-sweet-part-2/21708 this parent.]] "Ugh! He's not supposed to be polite to people on minimum wage!" Played straight by the child, though, who [[KarmicJackpot gets rewarded for his politeness]].
** The "[[http://notalwaysright.com/category/awesome-customers/ Awesome Customers]]" tag is explicitly for this kind of thing, since it's generally an exception.
* {{Ninja}}: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-house-elves-are-on-strike/13937 Someone heard about "mall ninja"]], but took the term too literally.
* NinjaPirateZombieRobot: [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-swim-where-the-sun-doesnt-shine/6741 "I'm a vampire mermaid! Gaaargh!"]]
* NoAnimalsWereHarmed: [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-political-causes-collide/1794 ...during the building of this table.]]
* NobodyHereButUsBirds: And they buy ''[[http://notalwaysright.com/bird-brained-part-6/6853 bird seed]]'', at that. [[OurWerebeastsAreDifferent Wereravens]] or [[RaisedByWolves raised by a flock]] -- take your pick.
* NobodyOver50IsGay: Averted [[http://notalwaysright.com/uk-is-ok/27136 here]], at the end.
* NoExceptYes: All the time. Frequently literal variations, such as a [[http://notalwaysright.com/cant-spell-without-without-with/14160 bacon cheeseburger with no bacon]], but not a cheeseburger which becomes the same bacon cheeseburger upon adding, you guessed that, bacon.
** Subverted in [[http://notalwaysright.com/to-bacon-or-not-to-bacon-that-is-the-digestion/21412 this example]].
** Another subversion: [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-are-tea-total-part-2/28075 An iced coffee without the coffee]] is ''not'' milk and ice, but milk, ice, and ''tea''.
* NoGuyWantsAnAmazon: [[http://notalwaysright.com/taking-stupidity-to-new-heights-part-2/22450 This customer seems to think so.]]
* NoHeroDiscount: A customer learns this in [[http://notalwaysright.com/with-great-retail-power/2528 With Great Retail Power]].
* NoIndoorVoice: [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-bus-drivers-should-rule-the-world/6166 And it even got her thrown off the bus.]]
* NoPronunciationGuide:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-hollow-victory/28069 I'm looking for a game called]] [[{{Halo}} Hollow.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/translation-kollaboration/31252 This foreigner]] taught himself English mostly by reading it, but ran headlong into this trope in the process.
* NoSenseOfDirection: [[http://notalwaysright.com/directionally-challenged/911 This fellow]] who doesn't seem to understand the concept of next door.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/for-the-love-of-god-get-gps/1096 This one]] seems to have trouble following directions. At least the guy's got a sense of humor about it.
* NoTrueScotsman: [[http://notalwaysright.com/customer-service-with-zeal/6067 Or should we say, No True New Zilander?]]
* NoodleImplements: [[http://notalwaysright.com/recipe-for-an-interesting-evening/1748 Ping-pong balls and Vaseline]]? That can't be good. Try searching for "ping-pong balls" on the NoodleImplements page and you'll see what I mean.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-can-not-end-well-part-2/1771 These two items in conjunction cannot lead to anything good]].
* NoodleIncident: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-secret-lives-of-customers/2061 Butter... inside a cellphone?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/elmer-fudd-calling-on-line-one/2511 Rabbit blood???]]
*** How do you expect [[EverymanHYBRID HABIT]] to update his Twitter if his phone doesn't work?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/hulk-smash-bagels/1550 No, not the bagels!]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/ex-box/9624 Do XBox 360s come with cup holders?]]"
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/if-it-looks-like-a-cow-and-moos-like-a-cow/12595 Due to difficulties returning from a petting zoo, my mother and I had a 3 month old calf riding in the front seat of our truck.]]
* NotAMorningPerson: [[http://notalwaysright.com/misery-demands-company-part-3/15810 This lady.]]
* NotGrowingUpSucks: [[http://notalwaysright.com/being-ageless-gets-old/24106 This poor guy does not even bother with his ID anymore.]]
* NotSoAboveItAll: [[http://notalwaysright.com/theres-something-in-those-poppy-seeds/24258 A boss that normally advocates "professional" behavior shelves it in favor of "good customer relations".]]
* NotWithTheSafetyOnYouWont: [[http://notalwaysright.com/drinking-shooters-all-night-long/29886 This cashier]] pulls the trope on a drunk wielding an airsoft gun.
* NumberOfTheBeast: A few accounts of superstitious customers trying to avoid paying $6.66, or getting $6.66 in change.
* NWordPrivileges: Taken to a(n il)logical conclusion [[http://notalwaysright.com/checking-him-in-and-checking-her-out/32723 here]]: apparently, having [[BarackObama a black President]] means this customer can shout vulgarities and sexually harass women without consequence.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:O]]
* ObfuscatingDisability: [[http://notalwaysright.com/making-a-spectacle-of-herself/28379 Assumed by this customer]]. [[SubvertedTrope She was wrong.]]
* ObnoxiousInLaws: [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-dogged-sense-of-humor/14870 He doesn't exactly call them...]]
* OhCrap: [[http://notalwaysright.com/mama-puts-a-stammer-in-your-swagger/25487 "All the color drains from his face. He manages to squeak out some words: 'Hi Mama.'"]]
* {{Omniglot}}: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-blind-leading-the-blind/942 This man]], even when he [[CrowningMomentOfFunny has no idea what language they're speaking.]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/se-habla-japanol/9879 Se Habla Japanol]]".
** To understand the conversation and tell the (hilarious) story, [[http://notalwaysright.com/english-and-polish-and-french-oh-my/11738 this person]] had to understand English, Polish, ''and'' French ([[TitleDrop oh, my]]!)
* OlderThanTheyLook:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/being-ageless-gets-old/24106 One story]] features a 33-year-old customer who looks like a teenager, trying to buy an M-rated game.
--->'''Customer:''' "[...] I even quit drinking because its too much of a hassle to buy beer!"
** It's the case for [[http://notalwaysright.com/fine-art-comes-with-age/29225 this caricaturist]].
* OneSideOfTheStory:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/direction-deflection/28738 This mall-goer]] asks a kiosk employee for the location of the post office. The employee begins to say that it's inside a camera store, but the mall-goer assumes that the employee is trying to drum up business for the camera store and [[RapidFireInterrupting repeatedly cuts off the employee]] before they can complete their directions. When they finally manage to explain the whole thing, the mall-goer berates the employee for not being clear.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/only-drunk-on-victory/28598 This man]] assumes that a grocery store employee is tired because she was partying too hard and that it's entirely her fault for being tired. [[RapidFireInterrupting He doesn't let her speak]] until he's finished ranting, at which point the employee explains that she's tired because she was working overnight and usually didn't do so. To the man's credit, he realized his place, apologized, and walked away.
** During a prom, [[http://notalwaysright.com/no-proof-in-purchase/27859 a teacher]] accuses a dry bar of selling alcohol to minors, but it isn't too long until the bartender manages to get in that the beer the teacher took was non-alcoholic, and there was no actual alcoholic drinks anywhere near the bar. At least the teacher gave the bottle back.
* OperatorFromIndia: A few stories involve call center employees being ''mistaken'' for this (or something similar) when they're actually from the ''same country'' as the caller.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/indiscriminate-discrimi-nation/20357 "I want to talk to an American! I dont want to talk to someone in India."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/indiscriminate-discrimi-nation-part-2/24603 "Your accent is appalling! I hate talking to you Asians!"]]
* OracularUrchin: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-matrix-rejected/853 Um... this woman]] seems to think her child has supernatural powers and requests a credit card transaction be canceled just because the child said the card was unlucky. And she was right, in a SelfFulfillingProphecy sorta way. Making the purchase and ''then'' asking instead of the other way around, ''then'' being too unreasonable to do the paperwork to undo the purchase - meaning it stands, even though the customer stormed off and didn't get the service, means a significant amount of money was wasted. So in the end the kid was right, though it was less the fault of the card and more the fault of the stupidity.
* OrgasmicallyDelicious: [[http://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-pow-in-kung-pao/2203 Mmm, oh yeah, kung pao chicken!]]
* OurVampiresAreDifferent: [[http://notalwaysright.com/more-daylight-less-twilight-part-7/17358 Here's one Twilight fan that doesn't know about this trope.]]
* OverlyLongGag:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-cows-order-coffee/286 I know that! That is a SMALL coffee with 11 MILKS!]]
** The [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-25/33138 "This Is Why We're In a Recession" series]], in ''double-digit'' numbers, with no signs of stopping.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/theres-something-in-those-poppy-seeds/24258 BAGEL BAGEL BAGEL BAGEL BAGEL!]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:P]]
* PapaWolf: [[http://notalwaysright.com/let-me-give-you-a-pizza-my-mind/10035 This guy.]]
* PaperThinDisguise: [[http://notalwaysright.com/devil-in-disguise/5221 This lady]] not only falls for one, she points out something different that ''wasn't even changed''.
* PanickyExpectantFather: Inverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/contractions-speak-louder-than-words-part-3/12085 here]], where the guy is ''not'' going to let the fact that his wife is visibly in labor and ready to drop stop him from arguing over a discount on a duffel bag. And the worse thing is the bag has nothing to do with the pregnancy; he needs it for a trip ''the next week''.
* ParkingPayback: While there's nothing over-the-top, some jerks who decide to disregard parking etiquette do get their comeuppance.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/two-rows-dont-make-a-right/23579 This jerk]] who parks in not one, but ''two'' handicapped spaces gets ticketed in the end.
** In [[http://notalwaysright.com/capable-of-handicapping-the-capable/32138 this story]], a young man cuts off another woman who was going to park in a handicapped spot, with his car that has nothing indicating that he's allowed to do so. The woman gets her payback when she sees the man and confronts him, and lets him see that she's very old. The man then offers to help her into the store.
* ThePasswordIsAlwaysSwordfish: [[http://notalwaysright.com/getting-to-the-out-source-of-the-matter/9983 In some cases, "Swordfish" would be a major improvement]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dont-pin-your-hopes-on-this-one/4648 Oops.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/pinheaded/278 O-o-ops]].
* PekingDuckChristmas: [[http://notalwaysright.com/one-good-takeout-deserves-another/15583 Inverted]].
* PeripheryDemographic:[[invoked]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/opposite-sex-men/10374 "Bu-But, youre old. And a girl!]]
* PersonaNonGrata: Many of the stories end with the unruly customer banned from the store. A few stories even deal with customers that are/were banned.
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/inexcretable-behavior/11505 Yeah, I'd say you're still barred]]".
* PerspectiveFlip: Of a sort; [[http://notalwaysright.com/precarious-insurance-part-3/9096 this]] one is a customer submitting their own ditz moment.
** "Not Always Working" is one for "Not Always Right," in a meta sense.
* PhlebotinumHandlingEquipment: Inverted. [[http://notalwaysright.com/save-it-on-a-flesh-drive/28231 Save It On A Flesh Drive]] mentions inability to use a capacitive touch screen while wearing gloves.
* PigInAPoke: [[http://notalwaysright.com/like-his-pond-his-argument-is-shallow/29765 This]] guy gets ripped off by (unknowingly) buying a much older pond pump than his last one from some guy on the Internet. He tries to get a refund from the pump company itself. It doesn't work.
* PintsizedPowerhouse: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-karate-kid-christmas-special/26311 This kid.]] [[BondOneLiner "I'll let you know what my sister thinks of the toy!"]]
* PlatonicProstitution: [[http://notalwaysright.com/fortunately-for-us-both-i-like-crazy/22447 This guy calls a phone sex line...]] and ends up talking about video games.
* PoesLaw: Exactly how many of the stories are genuine, how many are exaggerated/embellished versions of real events, and how many are actually pure bullshit made by trolls or somebody with an axe to grind?
* PointAndLaughShow
* PolitenessJudo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/courage-under-hire/22826 Used successfully here]]. It helps that the [[StupidCrooks crook was dumb]] and the cashier [[AchievementsInIgnorance didn't realize he was in danger]] [[DelayedReaction until afterwards]].
* PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/fowl-mouthed-accusations/2327 "Peacock"]] is a dirty word and you should be ashamed! I prefer you use the term "pearooster".
** Also, [[http://notalwaysright.com/fighting-ignorance-with-ignorance/9967 we don't say "Indian"]]. And [[http://notalwaysright.com/darkest-africa/6585 a map of Africa]] is disturbing.
** Inverted in another story. The store tries to be a little politically correct, selling "holiday trees", but apparently the customer wants a Christmas tree, and so will go to a store that "[[http://notalwaysright.com/please-call-customer-dis-service/3573 isn't afraid of offending people!]]"
** Another customer takes racial colors [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-dark-day-for-political-correctness/11827 a bit too seriously]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/teaching-a-righteous-dimwit-is-stressful/23028 This worker]] had to stop wearing her custom-made [[Series/DoctorWho TARDIS]] bracelet to work because a willfully ignorant customer believed it to be slang for "retard".
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-grinch-comes-earlier-every-year/25589 Well, that was rude! Its Happy Holidays. Saying Thanksgiving is politically incorrect! Stupid girl!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/so-slow-it-hertz-part-2/30892 "Everyone knows 'slow' is not politically correct! Your computer is 'mentally impared'!"]]
* PornStash: A external drive a guy brings into a shop has [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-tech-support-needs-hazard-pay/16341 500GB worth]] on it.
** He then proceeds to buy 4 more 16 GB flash drives.
* PottyEmergency: [[http://notalwaysright.com/try-calling-nine-one-number-two/9532 One person takes the concept a bit too literally.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/urine-her-way/24264 And another takes a more... uh, "proactive" approach.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/making-a-loud-a-pee-l/26502 In this case]], it's not clear whether the unfortunate result falls under PottyFailure or BringMyBrownPants. Perhaps both?
* PrecedentExcuse: [[http://notalwaysright.com/wine-spirits-of-camraderie/13510 This]] story has a drunk bar patron try to excuse their friend's drunkenness by arguing they're more drunk than them, thus getting them both thrown out.
-->'''Patron's friend:''' "Why are you kicking her out? I'm drunker than she is!"\\
'''[Anecdote Giver]:''' "Then you can leave, too!"
* PrecociousCrush: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/young-boys-love-player-time/28261 If there's a sandwich named after you, I would so eat it!]]"
* PrettyFlyForAWhiteGuy:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-to-scam-a-scammer-part-5/467 ... It's because I'm black, isn't it?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/wesley-called-he-wants-his-tan-back/663 Look, I just want to be as dark as that guy so I can learn how to rap.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/little-red-riding-in-the-hood/567 Pretty fly for a little white girl.]]
** Inverted [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-always-right-on-so-many-levels/921 here]]--a white guy ''not'' trying to be black is called a n***** by a RacistGrandma who's pretending to have a disability. It gets worse from there.
* PsychopathicManchild: A sizeable proportion of the customers.
* PunctuatedForEmphasis: Parody of the former TropeNamer [[http://notalwaysright.com/paging-leonidas-to-the-front-desk/1218 here]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/no-one-ever-said-it-would-be-boring/1832 here]]; these also fit the normal definition of the trope. The title of [[http://notalwaysright.com/thisisspyware/1371 this one]], also a reference to ''Film/ThreeHundred'', fits as well.
** And a more straightforward one: [[http://notalwaysright.com/stir-yes-sir/3188 "Medium! Coffee! Two! Equal!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/for-the-love-of-god-get-gps-part-2/5345 I'm! In! Canada!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/fresh-until-proven-spoiled/13487 SMELL MY HAM.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/he-is-not-a-mew-sed/29080 HE. IS. A. MAN. CAT!]]
* PunnyName: Meet [[http://notalwaysright.com/youre-welcome-custer-mer/22605 Clara Fication]].
* PuppyLove: [[http://notalwaysright.com/patience-is-priceless/18903 A boy who barely reaches the counter has been saving for his girlfriend's present]].
* PyrrhicVictory: A [[http://notalwaysright.com/guess-whose-picture-is-next-to-pyrrhic/787 few]] examples [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-pyrhhic-victory/138 crop up]] now and then for [[http://notalwaysright.com/it-pays-to-be-correct/18664 customers]] who put pride first.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:R]]
* RacistGrandma: [[http://notalwaysright.com/america-land-of-the-delusional/15341 It comes with]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-war-unwon/14873 the territory]]. One man somehow finds a way to be [[http://notalwaysright.com/judge-me-by-the-content-of-my-crustaceans/18543 racist about shrimp]].
* RapidFireInterrupting: [[http://notalwaysright.com/found-out-his-pecking-order/30042 It happens here]]. A customer calls a pet store and demands that they fix an order of chicks, constantly cutting the employee off and assuming that they were being lazy. To the customer's credit, once he realized that he called the wrong pet store, he promptly hung up.
* RapidFireNo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/having-funion-with-food/13147 This customer]] ''really'' doesn't like onions.
* ReadTheFreakingManual: [[http://notalwaysright.com/parental-guidance/29056 "Youre making fun of me for not reading directions, arent you?" "Kind of."]]
* RealityIsUnrealistic: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-conversation-has-taken-a-sudden-dive/9175 No, I don't think NASA will give you a 5-minute skydive either.]]
** A few entries are about women assuming that the employee's hair is fake (either in color or length) and refusing to believe the employee's hair is natural.
* ReallySevenHundredYearsOld: [[http://notalwaysright.com/elixirs-of-everlasting-life-are-on-aisle-5/3741 Or something...]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/there-can-be-only-one-insane-customer/1757 This guy seems to be well on his way.]]
* RealMenHateSugar: [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-to-show-up-a-show-off/17222 Not]] the case.
* RealWomenNeverWearDresses: [[http://notalwaysright.com/urine-way-over-your-head/558 Seems to be the thought behind this one]].
* TheReasonYouSuckSpeech: [[http://notalwaysright.com/taking-the-big-out-of-bigotry/24364 This customer's niece]] goes for this trope when the defensive approach proves ineffective. Along with any number of other examples when dealing with bigoted customers.
* RedScare: ''Way'' too many people seem to think this way. [[http://notalwaysright.com/in-soviet-america-product-buys-you/3373 e.g. this silly man.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-usually-compared/4547 And this one.]]
* ReflexiveResponse: [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-you-know-youve-been-working-too-long/10684 This one]].
* RefugeInAudacity: [[http://notalwaysright.com/perhaps-a-little-bit-too-free/212 A shining example.]]
** A rare aversion [[http://notalwaysright.com/blowing-things-out-and-up-of-proportion/23416 here.]] One has to wonder what the father was trying to accomplish with all the trouble.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/well-played-indeed/624 A well-played comeback to an inappropriate prank call.]]
* RescueRomance: A perfectly timed submission [[http://notalwaysright.com/domarry-the-one-you-love/30480 here]].
* RetailRiot: [[http://notalwaysright.com/coming-soon-to-not-always-right-a-zombie-apocalypse/16132 One comic strip]] showed "Why dealing with customers is worse than a Zombie Apocalypse". It states that "[[NoZombieCannibals Zombies will never attack each other]], even when supplies are scarce" while "Customers will attack each other, especially when supplies are scarce".
* RichInDollarsPoorInSense: [[http://notalwaysright.com/she-probably-needs-someone-to-put-her-clothes-on-too/265 "What is this, some sort of self service store?"]]
** Several of the stories on here are about extremely stubborn customers who will pay the price posted and '''''only''''' the price posted, no matter what sales or discounts are in effect despite not being advertised. It's like they're hardwired to believe that no matter what the store workers do, they're trying to rip them off.
*** [[http://notalwaysright.com/guess-whose-picture-is-next-to-pyrrhic/787 "I don't care how much it costs! Just do your job and give me my f**king milk for 29 dollars!"]] Also a PyrrhicVictory (thus the title).
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/needlessly-needy/20343 This upper class woman]] demanded money back for their kid's private school tuition because other people were going for cheaper. Her response after being told her kid didn't get any aid because her household made $170,000, and aid is usually given to those who make $20,000 or less a year? "You fucking liar! Nobody makes so little money!" Seems like the money has made her far too sheltered.
** Strange example [[http://notalwaysright.com/damaging-their-reliability/32909 here]]. A customer accidentally threw out a modem's power-supply, so she tries to scam the tech-support guy into giving her one for free. He'll only do it if it's broken, however. So, the customer breaks it. The tech-service guy refuses to give her one for free because he ''saw'' her break it. She then tries to bribe him, saying Ill pay you £30 to say you didnt see anything. The tech replies that a new one only costs £8 anyway. She then screams "Its not the amount; its the principle!" So, in the process of trying to get one for free, this customer is willing to pay more than three times the price of getting one legitimately? Okay, whatever, it's your money.
* RidiculouslyHumanRobots: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-facts-of-second-life/22306 Apparently]], some people think that store employees are these.
* RidiculousProcrastinator: [[http://notalwaysright.com/due-tonight-vs-do-tonight/17115 When is the paper due? Midnight.]]
* RightInFrontOfMe: [[http://notalwaysright.com/be-civil-to-the-civilians/31417 Two soldiers]] badmouth a civilian in front of their line over civilians shouldn't be allowed to shop at the on-base convenience store. Unfortunately, said "civilian" is actually their officer instructor who is not pleased. [[OhCrap Cue both soldiers turning pale and running out]]!
* RougeAnglesOfSatin: [[http://notalwaysright.com/spelling-gone-rogue/8515 "That's not how rogue is spelled!"]]
* RuleOfCute: [[http://notalwaysright.com/cute-but-not-astute/11271 This person thinks it applies to them.]]
* RuleOfThree: [[http://notalwaysright.com/pages-of-a-post-apocalyptic-persuasion/4390 This customer]] all but invokes it.
* RummageFail: [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-19/30215 This customer]] seems to have trouble finding the correct bills for a transaction. At least, that's what we ''hope'' is happening.
* RunningGag: Several entry titles come up over and over and over again, such as "This Is Why We're In A Recession, Part x" and "Literature/{{Twilight}} Of Our Literacy, Part Xx".
** On Not Always Romantic there is a ''very'' long running gag about zombies. They're all called "Till Undeath Do Us Part."
[[/folder]]

[[folder:S]]
* SadisticChoice: [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-picture-is-worth-a-thousand-woes/21598 So is it better to admit you stole the camera or that you use it to stalk underage girls?]]
* SarcasmFailure: [[LetMeGetThisStraight Describing the obviously-impossible task the customer has just requested in graphic detail]] ''might'' make it obvious that it can't (or won't) be done. But it seems to just as often meet with a reply of "Yes, yes, can you do that?" or "Exactly, why is that so hard to understand?"
* SaveGameLimits: See the ''Pokemon''-related example in "Socialization Bonus" below.
* ScaryBlackMan: A couple instances of InvokedTrope when dealing with racist customers, and another one that was {{Exploited|Trope}}.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/ironic-that-she-wants-a-race-car/30495 Dealing with a lady who refuses to buy a black doll.]]
** From the custserv desk: [[http://notalwaysright.com/addressed-the-race-issue/29739 Thank you. Oh, and before you go, you ought to know that Im the biggest, blackest mother-f***** youll ever meet in your life, and I know where you live. Good day.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/coffee-strong-and-proud/25295 Uh, no. The nice man behind the counter asked you to leave the store. I suggest you do so before I decide you need some help getting through the door.]]
** Never pull the racism card in front of [[http://notalwaysright.com/we-need-one-of-these-in-every-store-part-3/1033 this guy]].
* SchmuckBait: [[http://notalwaysright.com/putting-your-foot-in-it/3210 "Don't look at my feet."]]
* ScrewPolitenessImASenior:
** Invoked [[http://notalwaysright.com/have-age-will-complain/2189 here]].
** [[SkinshipGrope And]] [[DirtyOldMan also]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/aarp-membership-comes-with-a-few-hidden-perks/1000 here.]]
** And [[http://notalwaysright.com/her-slap-is-worse-than-her-bite/28221 here]]. Physically assaulting a person because they won't randomly do inane tasks for you? If you're old, that's A-OK!
** And [[http://notalwaysright.com/age-comes-before-rage/28616 here]], [[DefiedTrope only to get epically told where to put it]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/gramps-grumps/28451 This 80-year-old man]] acts mean because he can't do anything else.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/busted-part-2/29053 This man]] tries to bully/shame two teenagers into giving up their seats, but they (justifiably) refuse to cave, pointing out that the bus is ''nearly empty''.
* ScrewThisImOuttaHere: [[http://notalwaysright.com/getting-inside-the-meat-of-the-matter/27414 Did you just say someone was x-raying some meat?]] "I'm going on break."
* ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules: [[http://notalwaysright.com/in-line-and-out-of-line-part-2/33785 These abusive customers get thrown out of the store despite them being about to make a big purchase (over $1000 of merchandise).]]
* ScrewTheRulesIHaveConnections: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-quite-a-family-business/2529 Uh]], [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-a-latte-coupons/501 no]], [[http://notalwaysright.com/of-all-the-lies-to-tell/1047 you]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/lesson-1-how-to-scam-a-scammer/12 really]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-hiring-paramarketers/3727 don't]]. [[http://notalwaysright.com/outside-food-inside-job/32578 Here]] is a case where the actual manager was [[RightBehindMe right there at the time.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-like-it-not-hot/32582 Here's a customer]] who did have a connection, and abused it to get free food. Eventually, however, the store manager steps in, bans the customer, and suspends his connection (another manager) with no pay for a week.
** The final straw in [[http://notalwaysright.com/punch-drunk-and-love/31280 this]] HumiliationConga: not only does he ''not'' have connections, but the fellow customer whose removal he's asking for ''does''.
* ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney:
** See it [[http://notalwaysright.com/becoming-familiar-with-fiber/2073 here]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-hole-in-one/32216 A wealthy golf player hits a golf ball into another man's backyard]]. The golf player then proceeds to use the backyard as if it was part of the golf course. The owner of the backyard is angry with yet another rich jerk thinking he can just walk right on in like he owns the place. He gets fed up, so he bodily ''throws'' the golfer back onto the golf course. The golfer threatens to sue because he "paid good money", [[BrokenRecord as he reminds the owner every time he opens his mouth]]. The backyard owner says he'd like to see him try, countering with ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules.
-->'''Golfer''': Thats assault! I am calling the police on you! I paid good money!\\
'''Backyard Owner''': I dont give a d*** how much you paid; this is private property and according to the state penal code, I can remove you just like I did.\\
'''Golfer''': I'll sue! I paid good money!\\
'''Backyard Owner''': Go ahead; Ill be your lawyer.
* ScrewTheRulesImBeautiful: [[http://notalwaysright.com/snobbery-just-wont-cut-it/11953 "Beautiful people should have their hair done first!]] The ugly ones should wait!"
** "The ugly ones should waaaaaait!"
** There's also one story where a woman ''steals a pot full of coffee'' from a library because the librarian is apparently too ugly to have it. A florist then comes in and informs the librarian that the same woman just stole a bouquet of flowers from his shop for the same reason.
* ScrewYourself: [[http://notalwaysright.com/best-idea-ive-heard-all-day/1788 Best idea I've heard all day!]]
* SecretIdentity: [[http://notalwaysright.com/just-another-mild-mannered-horse/10310 For a unicorn]].
* SelfDeprecation: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-solemnest-guarantee/15766 This customer]].
* SeparatedByACommonLanguage: Somehow, [[http://notalwaysright.com/uk-is-ok/27136 this couple]] doesn't even recognize the employee ''is'' speaking English at first.
* SeriousBusiness: Sales, discounts, and refunds are '''serious motherfucking business'''. Attempts to dupe an employee into giving you one of these make up at least a third of the site.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/great-game-until-the-tornado-stole-home/2227 Who cares if there's an emergency, the game's on!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/jack-bauer-style-flowers/9949 "You're all a bunch of wimps! I risked my life getting here. I need to buy these petunias!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/contractions-speak-louder-than-words-part-3/12085 "We don't have time for that. My wife is in labor!"]] Also an example of HypocriticalHumor.
* ServileSnarker: A fair few employees.
* SexSells: Self-inflicted in "[[http://notalwaysright.com/talking-shirty/6685 Talking Shirty]]"
* ShapedLikeItself: [[http://notalwaysright.com/more-than-mildly-confused/4667 Here]]. [[http://notalwaysright.com/water-you-stupid-part-4/14754 Liquid drinks are made of liquid. That's what makes them drinkable.]]
** Unless it's too much like itself -- [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-problem-with-dirty-words/6397 dirt is too dirty]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/please-placebo-me/15128 salt is too salty]].
** And [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-cake-is-not-a-lie/24189 the cakes contain cake]].
* ShellShockedVeteran: [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-was-before-he-started-lobbing-cantaloupes/1010 Here.]]
* ShipperOnDeck: [[http://notalwaysright.com/abandon-all-mope-ye-who-enter-here/22590 This one]] was successful.
* ShuttingUpNow
* SillyWalk: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ministry-of-silly-walks/8583 "You walk like an employee."]] Followed by several attempts to walk like a customer.
* ASinisterClue: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-law-of-the-south-paw/2243 Um...]] no comment.
** Also [[http://notalwaysright.com/left-in-the-dark-ages/23437 here]].
* SkewedPriorities: Quite a few customers will, in the face of disaster or fierce weather, will demand service or wonder why nothing is working despite the immediate danger.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/jack-bauer-style-flowers/9949 This woman]] dodges falling glass for a bunch of flowers.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/demanding-to-a-fault/23396 This woman]] demands that a technician be sent to her house, which was in an earthquake zone. Even better is that she also left her house because of the earthquake. [[{{Hypocrite}} So she won't go to her house because it's unsafe, yet expects someone else to do the same]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/floods-cause-a-whole-raft-of-problems/10045 I don't care about floods! Where's my package?]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/deal-with-the-burning-issue-first/6456 This customer]] wants her cat food. Who cares of the building burns down first?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-wind-in-the-windows/3273 This woman]] asks about her computer despite a tornado warning going off.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/water-you-stupid-part-10/21312 This woman]] wonders why no copiers are working, despite everything, herself included, being in ''ankle-deep water''.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-pot-calling-the-blizzard-white/14603 This customer]] complains about a package even though deliveries are delayed due to bad weather. When they were asked if they could go to a store, they said that they were snowed in. [[{{Hypocrite}} So they are mad that the delivery people aren't taking risks to the weather, while playing it safe themselves]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/your-complaints-are-on-thin-ice/16902 This person]] complains about having to walk an extra block due to an iced-over sidewalk. Thankfully, she got the point when someone else told her that a boy was injured walking across that sidewalk.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/we-are-a-precipitation-mall-nation/10653 This customer]] can't believe that a store is still open despite a snowstorm. As for them, they came out there to make a return.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/naturally-stupid-part-2/6256 A thunderstorm interfered with my television service?]] I still want my television service!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/driving-miss-crazy-part-2/3546 This woman]] insists on going down a closed road despite an officer telling her of the danger. She charges ahead anyway, crashes, and [[{{Hypocrite}} yells at the officer for not telling her]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/your-forecast-for-today-dark/1443 There's a hurricane?]] Forget that, where's my television service?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-dorothy-does-her-shopping/562 This woman]] braves a tornado to get to a store.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/customer-to-the-rescue/425 This man]] demands his photos, even if the roads are too dangerous due to ice storms!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/harping-on/27326 This man]] values his daughter's harp over his ''own life''. His wife doesn't.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/contractions-speak-louder-than-words-part-3/12085 This guy]] would rather argue over the price of a duffel bag than take his wife -- who is visibly in labor -- to hospital. [[{{Hypocrite}} And then has the nerve to accuse the employees of "trying to kill [his] wife over a duffel bag!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/needs-to-back-up-and-see-the-bigger-picture/28735 I don't have backups of my financial system]]? Screw that, how can I make these error messages go away so I don't have to hit Enter all the time?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-20/30354 £1.36 for some cauliflower?]] I can't afford that at all! I'll have some £5 lottery tickets instead!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/on-the-other-hand-she-seems-fine/30364 This woman]] will take advantage of discounted prices, broken finger be damned!
* SmallNameBigEgo:
** A few customers like to pull the [[http://notalwaysright.com/she-fought-the-law-and-the-law-won-part-2/17501 "don't you know who I am" card]] when refused service for any reason. Even in the ''very'' rare occasion [[http://notalwaysright.com/navy-seals-fate-is-sealed/8575 that they actually do hold some importance]], there's AlwaysABiggerFish to put them down.
** Some customers think that their buying something funds the employees' paychecks, and thus lets them get away with any behavior they desire. What they don't realize is that they're just one person out of many who buys things, and sometimes, [[http://notalwaysright.com/fun-with-idle-threats/640 they're not even directly responsible for the employees' paychecks]].
** Some customers like to boast about their large salaries and hold it over the "lowly" workers, like [[http://notalwaysright.com/networking-notworking/32122 here]]. Like making more money is somehow a valid reason to insult the people who are probably more skilled then them.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/her-chances-of-a-place-are-spoiled/32516 A specific case here]]: a woman who seems to think that she gets to set the rules at a daycare, even trying to force them to switch ''cleaning supplies'' based on her preferences, just because. Naturally, she's forced off the premises after swearing at an eleven-year-old boy for daring to try to uphold the daycare's actual rules.
** And then there's [[http://notalwaysright.com/hey-mr-dj-put-my-record-on/30023 this woman]], who is ''no'' name and ''all'' ego - and when someone else puts her in her place she tries to ''kill him''.
* SnipeHunt: Quests for things like [[http://notalwaysright.com/stupidity-can-go-either-way/1769 left-handed golf balls]], mostly self-inflicted.
** A straight example: a [[Film/BackToTheFuture flux capacitor]] for [[http://notalwaysright.com/someones-about-to-get-smacked-to-the-future/1698 son's Xbox]].
* SoapWithinAShow: [[http://notalwaysright.com/as-the-checkout-line-churns/2181 With the show being real life,]] that poor woman.
* SocializationBonus: The unavailability of starter VideoGame/{{Pokemon}} after starting a new game, combined with the limit of one save file per Game Card, leads to destructive behavior in "[[http://notalwaysright.com/gotta-catch-his-son/24609 Gotta Catch His Son]]".
* [[SomewhereThisIndexIsCrying Somewhere An English Teacher Is Crying]]: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-tenth-circle-is-stupidity/4723 "What the heck is a poem?!"]]
* SpeaksFluentAnimal: [[http://notalwaysright.com/he-is-not-a-mew-sed/29080 Well, this customer thinks he does anyway...]]
* SpellMyNameWithAnS: A man called [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-hello-pheven/1501 Pheven]] or maybe Stesen.
* SpoiledBrat: [[http://notalwaysright.com/daddy-doesnt-brat-an-eyelid/33348 One who seems to think]] that since daddy lets her have everything she wants, everyone else in the world has to, too. And "daddy" is all too eager to accuse anyone who doesn't agree of being terrible single mothers.
* SpoiledSweet: [[http://notalwaysright.com/judge-a-sandwich-on-its-filling/27816 With a heaping helping of]] MoreThanMeetsTheEye.
* StayInTheKitchen:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-land-of-milk-and-money/3239 A few]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-estrogen-empire-strikes-back/489 examples.]]
** Everyone in the office is female? [[http://notalwaysright.com/revenge-is-a-dish-best-served-by-wives/2317 This place is doomed!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/additional-charge-for-unlimited-sexism-plan/18212 Almost literally.]]
** [[StrawMisogynist This man]] would like to remind you that [[http://notalwaysright.com/now-accepting-immigrants-from-femmerica/17722 "women ain't 'Merican"]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/ready-aim-equality/18793 "Ain't no women in guns. Mens the only ones who can know anything 'bout my situation!"]]
** This is apparently [[http://notalwaysright.com/hung-up-on-gender/19156 this customer's]] train of thought, spending ''eight hours'' hanging up just because the person responding was female.
** UpToEleven: One man's philosophy seems to be to '''''[[DomesticAbuse beat women into submission]]''''' when they don't do what he wants. When [[http://notalwaysright.com/r-e-s-p-e-c-t/22119 this woman]] stands up to him, [[ImprovisedWeapon draw bar]] in hand, it completely freaks him out. Thanks to the cops conveniently choosing that moment to arrive, [[LaserGuidedKarma his history caught up with him.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/man-up-and-let-a-woman-fix-it-part-2/24421 This man]] refuses to believe that a female tech support worker actually helped him, and decides that there was some man who told her what to say instead, despite the worker and the supervisor saying otherwise.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/supportive-of-technical-support/25521 Inverted in this case]]. This man encounters a female tech support worker; since he doesn't encounter them very often, and this is a stereotypically "male" occupation, he decides she ''must'' be good at her job. Whenever he calls in the future, he requests to speak with her specifically.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-painting-a-pretty-picture-of-himself-part-2/32371 This customer]] says the phrase while demonstrating his bigotry.
* StealingFromTheHotel: There's a story where the [[http://notalwaysright.com/thievers-cant-be-choosers/1399 guy ''complains'' about the towels he stole to hotel management]] (by phone, a while after he'd stayed there).
* StealthInsult: [[http://notalwaysright.com/dinosaur-brained/26949 "Maam, you clearly are just as intelligent as you present yourself to be."]] [[ComicallyMissingThePoint "Well, Im glad you realise it."]]
* StealthParody: It can be very difficult to tell whether some of these people are genuinely crazy or just real-life {{troll}}s.
* TheStoner: [[http://notalwaysright.com/as-opposed-to-the-ones-that-you-can-like-smoke/180 This customer]] is either this or a ValleyGirl.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dude-that-must-be-some-strong-weed-part-2/182 "Ah, no man, I need my money to get my weed."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/weeding-out-the-dumb-ones-2/17690 I see kayaks in the kayak room!]]
* StopHavingFunGuys:[[invoked]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/misery-demands-company/13293 This guy practically says the trope by name]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/rpg-really-pretentious-gamer/30608 This customer]] accosts another for buying a ''Halo'' game.
* StraightGay: [[http://notalwaysright.com/stereo-griping/7735 This guy]] seriously regrets coming out to a female friend who doesn't seem to understand this trope.
* StrawVegetarian: [[http://notalwaysright.com/as-long-as-its-a-tofu-hat/20429 Occasionally]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/ruining-it-for-everyone/15807 and]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/man-cannot-live-by-water-alone/1401 unfortunately]].
* StupidGood: [[http://notalwaysright.com/generosity-that-knows-no-bounds-or-much-of-anything-else/21780 "[The donation drive is] going on 'til September, but you know, you're allowed to say 'No' when we ask you." "No I'm not!"]]
* SunkCostFallacy: A lot of customers will continue on some very ''dumb'' courses not out of stupidity, but because they don't want to admit they're mistaken/wrong.
* SuperOCD: [[http://notalwaysright.com/belting-out-her-demands/26570 This customer]] seems to have a problem with the checkout's conveyor belt moving her items for her, to the point of a FreakOut.
* SureLetsGoWithThat: A common 'let's just get them the hell out of here' tactic once a customer's stupidity has gone too far.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/doe-is-dear/24560 Yes, maam. Thats exactly how it works.]]
* SuspiciouslySpecificDenial: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-fox-is-already-out-of-the-bag/4373 here]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/totally-lost-the-pot/9198 here]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/no-chance-of-defying-gravity/8750 I'm not stupid!]]
* SustainedMisunderstanding:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/time-to-close-the-books-on-this-one/22102 "Why is there a clothing store where your Short Hills store used to be?!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/parlez-vous-down-under/23904 "It means, 'I dont speak any French because Im not from France.'" "Oh, you! You French have such great senses of humor!"]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/their-mind-is-long-overdue/24088 This person]] accidentally calls a library, thinking they called a bank. After being corrected, they call again, mentioning bank business again.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-cake-is-a-lie-part-3/25165 Some people just don't understand the phrase "we doesn't sell cakes."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/racism-and-ignorance-go-hand-in-hand/28920 "[Having kids] at age twelve? You should be ashamed of yourself!]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-dont-you-call-the-cops-on-em/1153 Police department?! I was calling Dr. ***s office! How DARE you answer his phone!]]
* StupidCrooks: Has a few stories about stupid criminals in its database. Like [[http://notalwaysright.com/spicing-up-the-dealer/29216 these guys]].
[[/folder]]

[[folder:T]]
* TamponRun: [[http://notalwaysright.com/why-cashiers-should-rule-the-world/4230 Why Cashiers Should Rule the World]]. Bonus points for how the cashier handles the poor guy's heckler.
* TastesLikePurple:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-rainbow-of-flavor/1494 You should have told him it tastes like red.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/scented-for-an-electrifying-experience/13799 Electricity scented]].
* TautologicalTemplar: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-customer-is-not-always-righteous/23370 The Customer Is Not Always Righteous.]]
* TechnologyMarchesOn: [[http://notalwaysright.com/would-like-to-explain-but-they-havent-got-time/10616 "No. We should wait until next year, when they come out with the 4D [=TVs=]."]]
* TemptingFate: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/an-extra-shot-of-irony/26877 ...seriously, can you imagine if I was as stupid as him and spilled these!]]" ''[crash]'' "...I guess I deserved that."
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/lack-of-register-does-not-register/30520 This one has it]] with a side order of FailedASpotCheck.
* ThatCameOutWrong: Several stories have cases where a customer slips up in this manner.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/step-1-insert-foot-into-mouth/2250 "Oh, wow. I gotta watch how I phrase things."]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/ill-go-where-hes-going/2204 Ten virgins, please.]]
** ''Hopefully'' [[http://notalwaysright.com/pray-theyre-talking-about-baby-goats/8526 this one]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/they-are-not-the-balls-you-are-looking-for/19208 Young man, do you have balls]]?
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/buy-one-euphemism-get-the-second-one-free/17336 new jugs]]
** Someone calls a help desk and [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-networks-can-never-be-found/16795 refers to an 802.11g WLAN hotspot as a "G spot"]].
** The customer in [[http://notalwaysright.com/sure-thing-sweet-cheeks/18864 Sure Thing, Sweet Cheeks]] mentions a "rack"... of newspapers.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/time-for-cup-ples-counseling/23053 This customer]] wants to see the cup size... of a blender. Amusingly, he says this in the presence of ''his wife''.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/customer-service-stripped-bare/28694 "Strip down, facing me"]]
* ThatLiarLies: Too many times to count. Can't get your way at a store? Well then, they're obviously just lying in order to weasel out of doing any work, the lazy bastards!
* ThatsWhatSheSaid: [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-what-he-thought/7989 Turns up]] on [[http://notalwaysright.com/more-frisky-than-frail/782 occasion.]] [[http://notalwaysright.com/pay-up-shot-down/10394 Can backfire]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/comically-bad-timing/3152 This one]] is a particularly ridiculous one.
** And it's best not to ask about [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-offend-o-bot-3000-strikes-again/2105 this one]].
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-what-she-said/1780 Check the title.]]
* TheyJustDontGetIt: Far too common.
** A perfect double example would be [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-cake-is-a-lie-part-3/25165 here]]: a woman enters a bakery and asks them to create a wedding cake and bill her for it, totally ignoring the submitter's insistence that they don't sell cakes or send bills out before she leaves; naturally, none of what she asks for is accomplished. She then begins sending attorneys to the bakery, apparently oblivious to the reason why they all immediately drop her case against the bakery, and ends up going through ''four'' of them, probably wasting thousands or even millions of dollars in the process, before she gives up (or, less charitably, before she gets enough of a bad rep amongst attorneys that they won't take her case).
** To summarize [[http://notalwaysright.com/terrified-of-baggage/28364 this story]], "Do I need bags for this vacuum?" "No you don't need bags." "Okay, but do I need bags?"
* ThirdPersonPerson: [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-dark-chocolate-knight/20422 "The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?" "Yes. Yes, The Batman would."]]
* ThinkOfTheChildren:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/curiosity-kilt-the-peeping-tomcat/12847 This woman's]] excuse for banning kilts.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-customers-actually-give-a-jam/23895 This mother's]] reasoning for not stopping her kid from bumping a cart into an elderly lady ahead of them. The customer behind them thinks differently, and shows what might happen if the mother never disciplines her son.
* ThisExplainsSoMuch: The response when [[http://notalwaysright.com/kin-tell-a-lot-about-this-patient/23047 this customer]] admits he still lives with his mother.
* ThisIsForEmphasisBitch: [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-dont-work-here-does-not-work-here-part-5/26135 IN. MY. HOUSE. BITCH!]]
* ThisIsGonnaSuck: [[http://notalwaysright.com/indentured-shoe-vitude/10126 Shoes. Crap.]]
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-bus-into-busy/26838 "60. Some adults, mostly kids." *she breathes deeply in and lets it out slowly with a whoosh* "Got it."]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/sanity-hanging-by-a-shoe-string/29420 Hello]], I need shoes for all seven of my children. They're each a different size, I'd like to purchase three pairs each, and can you make sure that all the shoes are different? My children dont want shoes that are like each other's. And hurry up, I don't have all day!
* ThrowTheBookAtThem: [[http://notalwaysright.com/harry-potter-and-the-disorder-of-the-forks-flicks/21858 This psycho customer]].
* TimeTravel: Enough that there's [[http://notalwaysright.com/weekend-roundup-time-travel/18646 Top-rated collection]] of these stories.
** There's definitely demand for [[http://notalwaysright.com/all-the-news-thats-fated-to-print/17368 future newspapers]] and [[http://notalwaysright.com/maybe-if-you-watch-it-at-88-mph/17230 future/17230 TV shows]]. Also good for [[http://notalwaysright.com/pre-cog-movie-log/9496 sneaky scams]].
* TitleDrop: A surprising number of customers literally say "The customer is always right" as if it were some kind of magic spell that always makes it so.
** The saying "The customer is always right", when it is applicable, applies to business and business ONLY. Unfortunately, customers seem to think it applies to everything from religion to sexual orientation to opinions of any sort.
--->'''Customer''': I think that ''[Opinion A]''.\\
'''Worker''': That's fine. I happen to think that ''[Opinion B]''.\\
'''Customer''': Why? That's obviously wrong!\\
'''Worker''': Um, not really...\\
'''Customer''': Yes, it is! The customer is always right!
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-always-indeed/20847 This one]] actually adds the "not always" to the mix.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/banking-is-a-whole-different-animal/33462 And this one]], where a customer tries to call a bank, gets a veterinarian office instead, and refuses to believe he had the wrong number ''because "I just gave you my account number"'', as if said number is the magic phrase that turns any place he calls into his bank.
** {{Inverted|Trope}} [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-price-is-right-the-customer-is-not/33773 here]]: a customer tries to price-match turkeys with a competitor, insisting on getting their price even though this store's prices are actually cheaper than said competitor's. The cashier does not fight this ''because'' of the "customer is always right" logic.
* TooDumbToLive:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/live-wires-are-stupid-magnets/13140 Are those wires live?]] {{BOFH}} may have been trying too hard.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/fiery-temperaments-can-lead-to-explosive-situations/24042 NOT the customer buying £250 worth of fireworks]], but the person nearby who ''stomps on said customer's fireworks''. Fireworks may be relatively inert without an external ignition source, but that ''doesn't'' make stomping on them a safe thing to do.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-caller-is-off-the-hook/11949 Possibly a literal example]], Driving, while talking on one cellphone, and configuring another, with hot coffee between her knees. She was t-boned by another car. No word on what happened after that.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-fuelish-thing-to-do/29698 This customer]] recommends starting a fire in a barrel for warmth in the middle of a gas station.
* TooMuchInformation:
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/passing-it-forward/4296 "I've just had a horrible stomach ache all day, but I just farted and I feel much better!"]]
** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/vegetable-innuendos/17098 I'm sorry you had to hear that.]]"
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/blind-to-the-tmi-boundary/31160 An odd juxtaposition]] of wanting to do something in private...while publicly announcing exactly what you're doing. And yes, the description does fall under this trope.
* TranslationConvention: Being an English-only site. Whether someone is speaking a language other than English will usually only be noted if, say, multiple languages are being spoken in the example.
* TranslationYes: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/not-open-to-interpretation/31617 Wow, he said]] [[NarrativeProfanityFilter all that]] in one little sentence?"
* TheTreacheryOfImages: [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-customer-is-literally-peanuts/10727 "A card? Well, you shouldn't say it's a plant then. It's misleading."]]
* TropesAreNotBad: Meet [[http://notalwaysright.com/hear-speak-say-play-no-evil/4179 the reasonable]] MoralGuardian.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-a-wrap-on-the-rap/12353 An even better one]].
* TwinThreesomeFantasy: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-quite-the-code-to-success/10258 ...encoded]].
[[/folder]]
[[redirect:NotAlwaysRight/TropesMToT]]
13th Dec '13 5:12:14 PM Kadorhal
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* TitleDrop: A surprising number of customers literally say "The customer is always right" as if it were some kind of magic spell that makes it so.
** The saying "The customer is always right", when it is applicable, applies to business and business ONLY. Unfortunately, customers seem to think it applies to everything from religion to sexual orientation to opinions of any sort!

to:

* TitleDrop: A surprising number of customers literally say "The customer is always right" as if it were some kind of magic spell that always makes it so.
** The saying "The customer is always right", when it is applicable, applies to business and business ONLY. Unfortunately, customers seem to think it applies to everything from religion to sexual orientation to opinions of any sort!sort.



** [[http://notalwaysright.com/banking-is-a-whole-different-animal/33462 And this one]], where a customer tries to call a bank, gets a veterinarian office instead, and refuses to believe he had the wrong number ''because "I just gave you my account number"''.

to:

** [[http://notalwaysright.com/banking-is-a-whole-different-animal/33462 And this one]], where a customer tries to call a bank, gets a veterinarian office instead, and refuses to believe he had the wrong number ''because "I just gave you my account number"''.number"'', as if said number is the magic phrase that turns any place he calls into his bank.
** {{Inverted|Trope}} [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-price-is-right-the-customer-is-not/33773 here]]: a customer tries to price-match turkeys with a competitor, insisting on getting their price even though this store's prices are actually cheaper than said competitor's. The cashier does not fight this ''because'' of the "customer is always right" logic.
10th Dec '13 6:25:22 AM MarsJenkar
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* ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules: [[http://notalwaysright.com/in-line-and-out-of-line-part-2/33785 These abusive customers get thrown out of the store despite them being about to make a big purchase (over $1000 of merchandise).]]



* ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney: See it [[http://notalwaysright.com/becoming-familiar-with-fiber/2073 here]].

to:

* ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney: ScrewTheRulesIHaveMoney:
**
See it [[http://notalwaysright.com/becoming-familiar-with-fiber/2073 here]].
28th Nov '13 8:38:26 AM Kadorhal
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* RapidFireNo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/having-funion-with-food/13147 This customer]] ''really'' doesn't like onios.

to:

* RapidFireNo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/having-funion-with-food/13147 This customer]] ''really'' doesn't like onios.onions.
27th Nov '13 6:55:59 PM MikeK
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Added DiffLines:

** [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-do-work-here-does-not-work-here-2/33482 Inverted here:]] Even though the submitter is wearing a uniform, the customer refuses to believe they actually work there and aren't just using an elaborate method to cut in line.
27th Nov '13 12:53:37 PM Kadorhal
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* RapidFireNo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/having-funion-with-food/13147 This customer]] ''really'' doesn't like onions.

to:

* RapidFireNo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/having-funion-with-food/13147 This customer]] ''really'' doesn't like onions.onios.



** And then there's [[http://notalwaysright.com/hey-mr-dj-put-my-record-on/30023 this woman]], who is ''no'' name and ''all'' ego - and when someone else puts her in her place she tries to ''kill him''.



* SpoiledBrat: [[http://notalwaysright.com/daddy-doesnt-brat-an-eyelid/33348 One who seems to think]] that since daddy lets her have everything she wants, everyone else in the world has to, too. And "daddy" is all too eager to accuse anyone who doesn't agree of being terrible single mothers.



--->'''Customer''': I think that ''[Opinion A]''.
--->'''Worker''': That's fine. I happen to think that ''[Opinion B]''.
--->'''Customer''': Why? That's obviously wrong!
--->'''Worker''': Um, not really...
--->'''Customer''': Yes, it is! The customer is always right!

to:

--->'''Customer''': I think that ''[Opinion A]''.
--->'''Worker''':
A]''.\\
'''Worker''':
That's fine. I happen to think that ''[Opinion B]''.
--->'''Customer''':
B]''.\\
'''Customer''':
Why? That's obviously wrong!
--->'''Worker''':
wrong!\\
'''Worker''':
Um, not really...
--->'''Customer''':
really...\\
'''Customer''':
Yes, it is! The customer is always right!


Added DiffLines:

** [[http://notalwaysright.com/banking-is-a-whole-different-animal/33462 And this one]], where a customer tries to call a bank, gets a veterinarian office instead, and refuses to believe he had the wrong number ''because "I just gave you my account number"''.
23rd Nov '13 10:23:21 AM Kadorhal
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Added DiffLines:

* PrecedentExcuse: [[http://notalwaysright.com/wine-spirits-of-camraderie/13510 This]] story has a drunk bar patron try to excuse their friend's drunkenness by arguing they're more drunk than them, thus getting them both thrown out.
-->'''Patron's friend:''' "Why are you kicking her out? I'm drunker than she is!"\\
'''[Anecdote Giver]:''' "Then you can leave, too!"
15th Nov '13 6:53:53 AM MarsJenkar
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** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-20/30354 This Is Why We're In a Recession series]], in ''double-digit'' numbers, with no signs of stopping.

to:

** The [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-20/30354 This com/this-is-why-were-in-a-recession-part-25/33138 "This Is Why We're In a Recession Recession" series]], in ''double-digit'' numbers, with no signs of stopping.
5th Nov '13 9:36:28 AM SgtFrog1
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** [[http://notalwaysright.com/needlessly-needy/20343 This upper class woman]] demanded money back for their kid's private school tuition because other people were going for cheaper. Her response after being told her kid didn't get any aid because her household made $170,000, and aid is usually given to those who make $20,000 or less a year? "You fucking liar! Nobody makes so little money!" Seems like the money has made her far too sheltered.

to:

** [[http://notalwaysright.com/needlessly-needy/20343 This upper class woman]] demanded money back for their kid's private school tuition because other people were going for cheaper. Her response after being told her kid didn't get any aid because her household made $170,000, and aid is usually given to those who make $20,000 or less a year? "You fucking liar! Nobody makes so little money!" Seems like the money has made her far too sheltered. sheltered.
** Strange example [[http://notalwaysright.com/damaging-their-reliability/32909 here]]. A customer accidentally threw out a modem's power-supply, so she tries to scam the tech-support guy into giving her one for free. He'll only do it if it's broken, however. So, the customer breaks it. The tech-service guy refuses to give her one for free because he ''saw'' her break it. She then tries to bribe him, saying Ill pay you £30 to say you didnt see anything. The tech replies that a new one only costs £8 anyway. She then screams "Its not the amount; its the principle!" So, in the process of trying to get one for free, this customer is willing to pay more than three times the price of getting one legitimately? Okay, whatever, it's your money.
2nd Nov '13 10:35:06 AM MikeK
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** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ten-doctors-versus-the-ten-commandments-part-2/32724 A later entry]], also involving Dr. Who, starts out very similarly... But then the customer comes back to apologize, and admits she just has a negative reaction to the show because she was a fan growing up, but her parents refused to let her watch it, saying it was against their religion. The submitter responds by recommending her a memorabilia shop that could help her catch up on the 30 years of the show she's missed.

to:

** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-ten-doctors-versus-the-ten-commandments-part-2/32724 A later entry]], also involving Dr. Who, ''Doctor Who'', starts out very similarly... But then the customer comes back to apologize, and admits she just has a negative reaction to the show because she was a fan growing up, but her parents refused to let her watch it, saying it was against their religion. The submitter responds by recommending her a memorabilia shop that could help her catch up on the 30 years of the show she's missed.
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