History UsefulNotes / SwissWithArmyKnives

7th Jan '16 10:09:45 AM morane
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-->''Keine Kreuzer, keine Schweizer''
4th Sep '15 8:49:12 PM nombretomado
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One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King during the August 10th Insurrection of UsefulNotes/TheFrenchRevolution, where sections of Parisians, allied with provincial federal soldiers and the National Guard stormed the Tuileries Palace and demanded the King's custody. The Swiss Guards refused to surrender and in the resulting battle, 600 of them were killed (300 Revolutionaries dead) while UsefulNotes/LouisXVI fled and sought salvation at the newly formed National Assembly (they would later guillotine him). Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte . The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]][[note]]Which retain a subdued version of the sixteenth century styling, as the sleeves are still slightly poofy they still have an oversized collar, but the colors are a simple dull blue with white gloves and collar and black boots and beret.[[/note]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.

to:

One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King during the August 10th Insurrection of UsefulNotes/TheFrenchRevolution, where sections of Parisians, allied with provincial federal soldiers and the National Guard stormed the Tuileries Palace and demanded the King's custody. The Swiss Guards refused to surrender and in the resulting battle, 600 of them were killed (300 Revolutionaries dead) while UsefulNotes/LouisXVI fled and sought salvation at the newly formed National Assembly (they would later guillotine him). Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte .UsefulNotes/NapoleonBonaparte. The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]][[note]]Which retain a subdued version of the sixteenth century styling, as the sleeves are still slightly poofy they still have an oversized collar, but the colors are a simple dull blue with white gloves and collar and black boots and beret.[[/note]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.
3rd Jun '15 10:10:52 PM EchoFourDelta
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The Swiss Army is a force that is so well-armed that the country escaped both World Wars because the able-bodied men aged 18 above are conscripted and ready to fight as LaResistance. Marksmanship is highly prized, with Swiss soldiers tending to practice a ''lot'' and their rifles being designed for better range and accuracy than those of any potential invader, regardless of the increased cost this entails. This has resulted in the following, possibly apocryphal, conversation, along the lines of:

to:

The Swiss Army is a force that is so well-armed that the country escaped both World Wars because the able-bodied men aged 18 above are conscripted and ready to fight as LaResistance. Marksmanship is highly prized, with Swiss soldiers tending to practice a ''lot'' and their rifles being designed for better range and accuracy than those of any potential invader, regardless of the increased cost this entails. This has resulted in the following, possibly apocryphal, conversation, along the lines of:



The Swiss also created the CoolGun SIG SG-550 (continuing a long history of the Swiss Army issuing standard infantry rifles that have accuracy comparable to most nations' sniper rifles), the [=MOWAG=] Piranha AwesomePersonnelCarrier, and many other cool weapons. They don't make their own planes though, and have to buy from France [Mirage fighters] and the U.S [F-18 Hornet fighters], with the next generation not anymore defined, as the vote for the Swedish [Gripen fighters] failed. Many Swiss Air Force hangers are carved out of mountainsides, and the nation's highways are reinforced to serve as runways if needed.

to:

The Swiss also created the CoolGun SIG SG-550 (continuing a long history of the Swiss Army issuing standard infantry rifles that have accuracy comparable to most nations' sniper rifles), SG-550, the [=MOWAG=] Piranha AwesomePersonnelCarrier, and many other cool weapons. They don't make their own planes though, and have to buy from France [Mirage fighters] and the U.S [F-18 Hornet fighters], with the next generation not anymore defined, as the vote for the Swedish [Gripen fighters] failed. Many Swiss Air Force hangers are carved out of mountainsides, and the nation's highways are reinforced to serve as runways if needed.
17th Apr '15 2:07:01 AM JulianLapostat
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One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King during the August 10th Insurrection of UsefulNotes/TheFrenchRevolution, where sections of Parisians, allied with the National Guard stormed the Tuileries Palace and demanded the King's custody. The Swiss Guards refused to surrender and in the resulting battle, 600 of them were killed (300 Revolutionaries dead) while UsefulNotes/LouisXVI fled and sought salvation at the newly formed National Assembly (they would later guillotine him). Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte . The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]][[note]]Which retain a subdued version of the sixteenth century styling, as the sleeves are still slightly poofy they still have an oversized collar, but the colors are a simple dull blue with white gloves and collar and black boots and beret.[[/note]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.

to:

One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King during the August 10th Insurrection of UsefulNotes/TheFrenchRevolution, where sections of Parisians, allied with provincial federal soldiers and the National Guard stormed the Tuileries Palace and demanded the King's custody. The Swiss Guards refused to surrender and in the resulting battle, 600 of them were killed (300 Revolutionaries dead) while UsefulNotes/LouisXVI fled and sought salvation at the newly formed National Assembly (they would later guillotine him). Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte . The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]][[note]]Which retain a subdued version of the sixteenth century styling, as the sleeves are still slightly poofy they still have an oversized collar, but the colors are a simple dull blue with white gloves and collar and black boots and beret.[[/note]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.
17th Apr '15 2:06:33 AM JulianLapostat
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One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King against a Parisian mob. Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte . The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]][[note]]Which retain a subdued version of the sixteenth century styling, as the sleeves are still slightly poofy they still have an oversized collar, but the colors are a simple dull blue with white gloves and collar and black boots and beret.[[/note]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.

to:

One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King against a Parisian mob.during the August 10th Insurrection of UsefulNotes/TheFrenchRevolution, where sections of Parisians, allied with the National Guard stormed the Tuileries Palace and demanded the King's custody. The Swiss Guards refused to surrender and in the resulting battle, 600 of them were killed (300 Revolutionaries dead) while UsefulNotes/LouisXVI fled and sought salvation at the newly formed National Assembly (they would later guillotine him). Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte . The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]][[note]]Which retain a subdued version of the sixteenth century styling, as the sleeves are still slightly poofy they still have an oversized collar, but the colors are a simple dull blue with white gloves and collar and black boots and beret.[[/note]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.
17th Apr '15 2:06:33 AM JulianLapostat
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4th Mar '15 1:50:41 AM SSJMagus
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One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King against a Parisian mob. Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte . The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.

to:

One note that might be made is that the Swiss Army wasn't always so, well, respectable. They were once the most ferocious PrivateMilitaryContractors in Europe, their [[BladeOnAStick pikemen]] contributing to major revolutions in military doctrine, and the cost of their pikemen contributing to several national bankruptcies. Later they were highly valued and formed part of the bodyguard of several European monarchs, including the King of France. In this role they made a LastStand defending the King against a Parisian mob. Interestingly, in the Napoleonic Wars they wore red coats which made them easy to confuse with British, against whom they were sometimes arrayed as part of the forces of NapoleonBonaparte . The Pope ''still'' [[CadreOfForeignBodyguards uses Swiss troops as guards]] (the only exception to the eventual Swiss ban on serving as mercenaries) - they may look a bit behind the times, with their sixteenth-century outfits, but underneath the [[HighlyConspicuousUniform poofy sleeves and wacky colors]], they're heavily armed and (reportedly) armored. The Swiss Guard troops not on ceremonial duty stay mostly out of sight wearing [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gs1.jpg more practical uniforms]].uniforms]][[note]]Which retain a subdued version of the sixteenth century styling, as the sleeves are still slightly poofy they still have an oversized collar, but the colors are a simple dull blue with white gloves and collar and black boots and beret.[[/note]]. An example of this was seen in 1981 when an assassination attempt was made against the Pope; the "hidden" Swiss Guards came out with submachine guns ready.
12th Jul '14 8:53:22 PM Kalmbach
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During the World Wars they enforced their country's neutrality well. Several times they shot and forced down planes of both belligerents who were intruding on their airspace, including 11 Luftwaffe planes, most of them while flying Messerschmitt fighters that they had purchased from Germany! Well, Hitler got so annoyed with them in the end, that he attempted to sabotage their airfields, to no avail. When the Allies accidentally bombed Swiss cities, the Swiss captured up to 100 US bombers and their crews meanwhile. Notwithstanding these incidents, however, the value that the Swiss provided as a [[TruceCity convenient neutral for diplomacy]], [[CityOfSpies espionage]], money laundering, etc. was so great that neither side seriously considered launching a full-scale attack on the Swiss, notwithstanding occasional threats.

to:

During the World Wars they enforced their country's neutrality well. Several times they shot and forced down planes of both belligerents who were intruding on their airspace, including 11 Luftwaffe planes, most of them while flying Messerschmitt fighters that they had purchased from Germany! Well, Hitler got so annoyed with them in the end, that he attempted to sabotage their airfields, to no avail. When the Allies accidentally bombed Swiss cities, the Swiss captured up to 100 US bombers and their crews meanwhile. Notwithstanding these incidents, however, the value that the Swiss provided as a [[TruceCity [[TruceZone convenient neutral for diplomacy]], [[CityOfSpies espionage]], money laundering, etc. was so great that neither side seriously considered launching a full-scale attack on the Swiss, notwithstanding occasional threats.
12th Jul '14 8:52:51 PM Kalmbach
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During the World Wars they enforced their country's neutrality well. Several times they shot and forced down planes of both belligerents who were intruding on their airspace, including 11 Luftwaffe planes, most of them while flying Messerschmitt fighters that they had purchased from Germany! Well, Hitler got so annoyed with them in the end, that he attempted to sabotage their airfields, to no avail. When the Allies accidentally bombed Swiss cities, the Swiss captured up to 100 US bombers and their crews meanwhile. Notwithstanding these incidents, however, the value that the Swiss provided as a convenient neutral for diplomacy, espionage, money laundering, etc. was so great that neither side seriously considered launching a full-scale attack on the Swiss, notwithstanding occasional threats.

to:

During the World Wars they enforced their country's neutrality well. Several times they shot and forced down planes of both belligerents who were intruding on their airspace, including 11 Luftwaffe planes, most of them while flying Messerschmitt fighters that they had purchased from Germany! Well, Hitler got so annoyed with them in the end, that he attempted to sabotage their airfields, to no avail. When the Allies accidentally bombed Swiss cities, the Swiss captured up to 100 US bombers and their crews meanwhile. Notwithstanding these incidents, however, the value that the Swiss provided as a [[TruceCity convenient neutral for diplomacy, espionage, diplomacy]], [[CityOfSpies espionage]], money laundering, etc. was so great that neither side seriously considered launching a full-scale attack on the Swiss, notwithstanding occasional threats.
12th Jul '14 8:51:05 PM Kalmbach
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'''Swiss General:''' [[MathematiciansAnswer We will all shoot ten times, then go home.]]

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'''Swiss General:''' [[MathematiciansAnswer We will all shoot ten times, times,]] [[BadassBoast then go home.]]
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