History Tropers / ALMA

''I have always been here\\

Nobody lives forever''

Once I had a really long, cool profile, but then for five minutes I decided I was taking a leave of absence from the Internet. When I came rushing back, I swiftly regretted backspacing all that cool shit. I think I still have my Troper Wall, though, but I can't remember how to link to it.

Suffice it to say, I'm a ghost who haunts Yack Fest occasionally and has vast delusions of grandeur. Don't take me seriously. I am actually a deeply anxious individual plagued by insecurities. I'm probably not even cool on the Internet.

----

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:My Thread Collection]]
Part of my research for forever-in-progress creative works.

* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13538163980A49400100 Dark Galaxy]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13536149680A37680100 Life on a Tidally Locked Planet]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13537681620A60180100 Adapting Humans to Survive in Space]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13536404350A62060100 How to Go About the Research]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13491583850A98360100&page=4 God Creating Life, Then Taking a Break]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13537490350A7128010 Need Help Creating a Magic System]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13606164400A06680100 An Alien Planet with Multiple Evolutionary Trees + Other Ideas]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13603200330A29540100 Robot Feet]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13592944410A68880200 Nonstandard Sci-Fi Fleet]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13614075230A1080190 The Science and Sci-Fi Questions Thread]]
* [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13632308470A28355800 The Geography of an Alien Planet]]
[[/folder]]

Shit, I'm posting here again. Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water. Now I'm kind of annoyed that I got rid of the really long profile I'd written here.

[[folder:Almariffic Movies]]
* {{Stand By Me}}
* The [=ABCs=] of Death
* {{TRON}} and {{TRON Legacy}}
* {{The Godfather}}
* {{The Exorcist}}
* {{Heavy Metal}}
* {{Creepshow}}
* {{The Black Cauldron}}
* {{The Brave Little Toaster}}
* {{Hellraiser}}
* {{Total Recall}} (The original)
* {{Ferngully The Last Rainforest}}
* {{Super Mario Bros}} (Yes, THAT one)
* {{The Lawnmower Man}}
* {{The Grudge}} (The American one)
* {{The Ring}} (Again, the American one)
* {{The Princess and the Goblin}}
* {{The Swan Princess}}
* {{Tank Girl}}
* {{Johnny Mnemonic}}
* {{Titan AE}}
* {{Quest for Camelot}}
* {{Jeepers Creepers}}
* {{Starship Troopers}}
* {{Mimic}}
* {{Cube}}
* {{Event Horizon}}
* {{Lake Placid}}
* {{Atlantis The Lost Empire}}
* {{Equilibrium}}
* {{Eight Legged Freaks}}
* The {{Predator}} films
* The {{Alien}} films
* {{Black Swan}}
* {{District 9}}
* The {{Shrek}} films
* {{Nine}} (With the puppet dudes)
* {{Thor}}
* {{The Avengers}}
* {{The Thing}} (All versions: {{The Thing from Another World}}, John Carpenter's, and 2011 remake... I mean, PREQUEL)
* {{Prince of Darkness}}
* {{The Blob}} (1980s)
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Almariffic Games]]
* {{Spore}}
* The {{Mass Effect}} series
* The {{Halo}} series
* The {{Dead Space}} series
* The {{Fallout}} series
* {{The Elder Scrolls V Skyrim}}
* The {{Resident Evil}} series
* The {{Metroid}} series
* The {{Tomb Raider}} series
* {{The Sims 3}}
* {{Far Cry 3}}
* Popcap: {{Plants vs Zombies}}, {{Bejeweled}}, {{Bookworm Adventures}}
* The {{Crysis}} series
* {{Deus Ex}} and {{Deus Ex Human Revolution}}
* {{System Shock 2}}
* The {{Bioshock}} series
* {{Left 4 Dead 2}}
* [[FirstEncounterAssaultRecon F.E.A.R.]] (Yes, I'm THAT Alma.)
* {{Doom 3}}
* {{Penny Arcade Adventures}}
* {{MediEvil}}
* {{Mischief Makers}}
* The {{Legend of Zelda}} series
[[/folder]]

[[folder: Almariffic Music]]
* GWAR
* Machinae Supremacy
* Aborted
* AC/DC
* Akercocke
* Alien Vampires
* Akira Yamaoka
* Angel Witch
* Asphyx
* Battle Beast
* Behemoth
* Cannibal Corpse
* Iron Maiden
* Cerebral Bore
* Cryptopsy
* Cyborg Attack
* Daft Punk
* Dead Can Dance
* Deathstars
* Dimmu Borgir
* Disfiguring the Goddess
* Dragonforce (I REGRET NOTHING)
* Rammstein
* Eisbrecher
* Engorged
* Evildead
* The Faceless
* Fear Factory
* Flesh Field
* Fleshgod Apocalypse
* Fog of War
* Gama Bomb
* Ghoul
* God Dethroned
* Gorerotted
* Gorgoroth
* Grendel
* Helltrash
* I Fight Dragons
* Impaled
* Incinerate
* Iron Savior
* James Labrie
* Juno Reactor
* KMFDM
* Lady Gaga
* Lair of the Minotaur
* Lord Gore
* Lordi
* Lords of Acid
* Megadeth
* Megaherz
* Nero
* Nightwish
* Nile
* Nuclear Assault
* Old Man's Child
* Pathology
* Pink Floyd
* Rings of Saturn
* Skinless
* Symphony X
* Toxik
* Vomitory
* ...And many more!
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Almariffic TV]]
* {{The Mask}} (Cartoon)
* {{The Outer Limits}}
* {{Spongebob Squarepants}}
* {{The Legend of Korra}}
* {{Gargoyles}}
* {{Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles}}
* {{The X Files}}
* {{The Twilight Zone}}
* {{Star Wars The Clone Wars}}
* {{Reboot}}
* {{Supernatural}}
* {{Bubblegum Crisis}} (''Tokyo 2040'' series)
* {{Elfen Lied}}
* {{Farscape}}
* {{Neon Genesis Evangelion}}
* {{SWAT Kats}}
* {{Star Trek}} (TNG and Voyager)
* {{Action Man}} (1995 series)
[[/folder]]

Sorry, guys! I don't post here anymore. I'm trying to cut down as much as I can on my Internet use, so I'm only using Tumblr now--find me at http://dragonborntoparty.tumblr.com. Find me there and follow me if you want to keep in touch with me.

Some stuff I'll leave here for reference.

This stuff's important. I'm working on a novel (among other things, which will probably never be finished), and these are the threads I've made about it or in which I've asked questions to do with the work. Thank you, TV Tropes, for already helping me to become a better writer.

Also, as I am obsessive archivist, some of these may have only marginal relevance to my work. I felt they were important enough to include anyway.

Sorry, guys! I don't post here anymore. I'm trying to cut down as much as I can on my Internet use, so I'm only using [[url=http://dragonborntoparty.tumblr.com]]Tumblr[[/url]] now. Find me there and follow me if you want to keep in touch with me.

---

'''''[[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperWall/Alma I HAVE A TROPER WALL NOW. GO VANDALIZE THAT SHIT. BUT BE NICE.]]'''''

┬─┬ ︵ /(.□. \）

The table flipped me.

'''HATRED ORIGINATING FROM DISREPUTABLE GENTLEMEN IS GOING TO CONTINUALLY PERSIST'''

[[quoteright:350:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/TTjordieprofile_3228.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:350: Me in my human disguise. My true form cannot be displayed here, as I'm afraid it [[GoMadFromTheRevelation would warp your pathe--I mean,]] ''[[GoMadFromTheRevelation modest]]'' [[GoMadFromTheRevelation human minds.]]]]

[[quoteright:350:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/pervertedLADY_3661.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:350:Her arms look like folded water noodles. [[UncannyValley Cannot unsee.]]]]

->'''Squidward:''' ''Patrick, just how dumb are you?''
->'''Patrick:''' ''It varies.''
->-- ''{{Spongebob Squarepants}}''

->''Oh no, don't go, oh no, oh, slow down, Joe''
->''The righteous path is straight as an arrow''
->''Take a walk and you'll find it's too narrow''
->''Too narrow for the likes of me''

->''Who's that hanging from the gallow tree?''
->''His eyes are hollow, but he looks like me''
->''Who's that swinging from the gallow tree?''
->''Up jumped the Devil and took my soul from me''
->--''[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNQn-r87lRA Up Jumped the Devil]]'', ''Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds''

[[folder:Previous Signatures]]
Nothing ever stays the same in Almaland. Here are some of the signatures I've used in the past.

* '''One of these bullets has got your name on it, and I'm gonna keep firing 'til I figure out which one it is!'''
* '''[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Jji78uEW14 I'm gonna take you to the bank, Senator Trent... To the blood bank.]]'''

[[folder:Quotes]]
"The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be."\\
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by his heart, and his friends can only read the title."\\
- Virginia Woolf

"He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you."\\
- Friedrich Nietzsche

"He who is unable to live in society, or who has no need because he is sufficient for himself, must be either a beast or a god."\\
- Aristotle

"But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.\\
"Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat. "We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."\\
"How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.\\
"You must be," said the Cat. "Or you wouldn't have come here."\\
- {{Alice in Wonderland}}, Lewis Carroll

"Philosophy is a study that lets us be unhappy more intelligently."\\
- Anon.

"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"\\
- The late, the great, George Carlin.

"The world is not imperfect or slowly evolving along a path to perfection. No, it is perfect at every moment, every sin already carries grace in it."\\
- Hermann Hesse

"Brilliant people often have the most persuasive demons."\\
- Lawrence Robertson, {{I Robot}}

"There's no right, there's no wrong, there's only popular opinion."\\
- Jeffrey, {{Twelve Monkeys}}

"If scientific reasoning were limited to the logical processes of arithmetic, we should not get very far in our understanding of the physical world. One might as well attempt to grasp the game of poker entirely by the use of the mathematics of probability."\\
- Vannevar Bush

"The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget."\\
- Thomas Szasz

"Government is too big and too important to be left to the politicians."\\
- Chester Bowles

"Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve."\\
- George Bernard Shaw

"Choose silence of all virtues, for by it you hear other men's imperfections, and conceal your own."\\
- George Bernard Shaw

"Do unto others, before they do unto you."\\
- Multiple (Attributed to {{Neil Gaiman}} and {{Terry Pratchett}})

"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."\\
- George Bernard Shaw

"We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing."\\
- George Bernard Shaw

"There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter."\\
- Ernest Hemingway

"All stories, if continued far enough, end in death, and he is no true story teller who would keep that from you."\\
- Ernest Hemingway

"We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master."\\
- Ernest Hemingway

"When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained."\\
- Mark Twain

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye."\\
- Miss Piggy

"If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates."\\
- Jay Leno

"There are three classes of intellects: one which comprehends by itself; another which appreciates what others comprehend; and a third which neither comprehends by itself nor by the showing of others; the first is the most excellent, the second is good, and the third is useless."\\
- Niccolo Macchiavelli

"Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it."\\
- Confucius

"If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?"\\
- Laurence J. Peter

"There are five dangerous faults which may affect a general: 1. Recklessness, which leads to destruction; 2. cowardice, which leads to capture; 3. a hasty temper, which can be provoked by insults; 4. a delicacy of honour which is sensitive to shame; 5. over-solicitude for his men, which exposes him to worry and trouble."\\
- {{The Art of War}}, Sun Tzŭ

"The great tragedy of Science - the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact."\\
- Thomas H. Huxley

"Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps."\\
- Emo Phillips

"Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it."\\
- Jane Wagner

"The only paradise is paradise lost."\\
- Marcel Proust

"The idea of reincarnation comes from a natural sense that there is more in this world than we can taste or touch. Unfortunately, this is the main point: time. You think of time as if it were a straight line, like a road or a train track, with the past at one end and the future at the other. The metaphor is seductive, but it's highly misleading. The world was flat until we discovered it was round.\\
I used to think that time was linear, like a string. But maybe time isn't that way. Maybe each moment lasts forever and its only our perception that strings them together. Any time you want."\\
- {{Witchblade}} (Taken from the {{Machinae Supremacy}} song ''Timeline'')

"So this is how liberty dies...with thunderous applause."\\
- Padme Amidala, {{Revenge of the Sith}}

"Men never commit evil so fully and joyfully as when they do it for religious convictions."\\
- Blaise Pascal

"I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly."\\
- Winston Churchill

"Do not repeat the tactics which have gained you one victory, but let your methods be regulated by the infinite variety of circumstances."\\
- {{The Art of War}}, Sun Tzŭ

"If destruction be our lot, we must ourselves be its author and finisher. As a nation of freemen, we must live through all time, or die by suicide."\\
- Abraham Lincoln, Lyceum Address

"Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power."\\
- Abraham Lincoln

"Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."\\
- Terry Pratchett

"In a thousand years, archaeologists will dig up tanning beds and think we fried people as punishment."\\
- Olivia Wilde

"The difference between fiction and reality is that fiction has to make sense."\\
- Tom Clancy

"There is no other way of guarding oneself against flattery than by letting men understand that they will not offend you by speaking the truth; but when everyone can tell you the truth, you lose their respect."\\
- Machiavelli

"Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind."\\
- Albert Einstein

"Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead."\\
- Benjamin Franklin

"Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see."\\
- Arthur Schopenhauer

"If we were to wake up some morning and find that everyone was the same race, creed and color, we would find some other cause for prejudice by noon."\\
- George Aiken

"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently."\\
- Henry Ford

"Happiness is not achieved by the conscious pursuit of happiness; it is generally the by-product of other activities."\\
- Aldous Huxley

"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."\\
- Albert Einstein

"You said 'God is cruel' the way a person who's lived his whole life on Tahiti might say 'Snow is cold.' You knew, but you didn't understand. Do you know how cruel your God can be, David? How fantastically cruel? Sometimes he makes us live."\\
- ''{{Desperation}}'', by Stephen King

"Life is just one damned thing after another."\\
- Erbert Hubbard

"It is the mark of an educated mind to entertain an idea without accepting it."\\
- Aristotle

"The man who is to be great is the one who can be the most solitary, the most hidden, the most deviant, the man beyond good and evil, lord of his virtues, a man lavishly endowed with will--this is precisely what greatness is to be called: it is able to be as much a totality as something multi-faceted, as wide as it is full."\\
- Friedrich Nietzsche

"Evil, be thou my good."\\
- Satan, {{Paradise Lost}}

"Evil does not necessarily disprove a good God. Quite on the contrary, evil may be a necessary element of a good God. Without evil, we could not know good. This is the Duality Theorem. We can only know light because there is dark, pain because there is pleasure. Opposites define each other.\\
Another factor is the teleological aspect of pain. Perhaps our life on Earth is sort of like a spiritual ‘boot camp’ or gymnasium, in which we are getting opportunities to evolve to higher levels of spiritual development.\\
We may need the pain, grief, hardship and evil that comes to us in the same way that an athlete needs the pain of a hard workout to prepare to play at higher levels of performance.\\
Perhaps it is all in how we define the situation. If I define every situation as an opportunity for growth, I can be grateful for it. The key factor is our response. If we can respond with patience, kindness, forgiveness, love and understanding to ALL things, perhaps we can evolve to a higher level.\\
Perhaps that is why we are here."\\
- Richard E. Yinger

"It is better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."\\
- Mark Twain

"An atheist is someone who is certain that God does not exist, someone who has compelling evidence against the existence of God. I know of no such compelling evidence. Because God can be relegated to remote times and places and to ultimate causes, we would have to know a great deal more about the universe than we do now to be sure that no such God exists. To be certain of the existence of God and to be certain of the nonexistence of God seem to me to be the confident extremes in a subject so riddled with doubt and uncertainty as to inspire very little confidence indeed."\\
- Carl Sagan

"Critics who treat 'adult' as a term of approval, instead of as a merely descriptive term, cannot be adult themselves. To be concerned about being grown up, to admire the grown up because it is grown up, to blush at the suspicion of being childish; these things are the marks of childhood and adolescence. And in childhood and adolescence they are, in moderation, healthy symptoms. Young things ought to want to grow. But to carry on into middle life or even into early manhood this concern about being adult is a mark of really arrested development. When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up."\\
- C. S. Lewis

"And one idol lit up by that flash, seen fair and lovely on a dream-throne of silk and gold under a chryselephantine dome, is a shape of deathless grace not always given its due among groping mortals -- the haughty, the unconquered, the mysterious, the luxurious, the Babylonian, the impersonal, the eternal companion of superiority and art -- the type of perfect beauty and the brother of poetry -- the bland, grave, compliant, and patrician cat."\\
- H. P. Lovecraft, [[http://www.psy-q.ch/lovecraft/html/catsdogs.htm Cats and Dogs]]

"Well, I object to all this sex on the television! I mean, I keep falling off!"\\
- ''Monty Python's Flying Circus''

"He looks like something that fell off my dick during the war!"\\
- ''{{Slither}}''

What if butterface was literal.\\
And you saw a person with a face made out of butter.\\
And they look at you and go "gonna butter your biscuit".\\
- @/{{That One Guy Named X}}

@/{{That One Guy Named X}}: I am a grape flavored alligator in real life.\\
@/{{Topographic Ocean}}: How do you know you are grape flavoured? :o\\
@/{{That One Guy Named X}}: Don't ask.

"They say 'Only madmen know the truth'. I don't know who said it, though. It could have been a madman."\\
- The Narrator, [[ColonCancer Penny Arcade Adventures: On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness: Episode 2]]

Everyone knows you never go full troll.\\
- @/{{Nohbody}}, on how not to win an Oscar

HELLO FRIENDS\\
NO\\
I WILL NOT BOOB\\
- @/{{Inhopelessguy}}, on actively resisting the charms of the fairer sex

"I'm a baller on a budget, BITCH!"\\
- @/{{KalloonWhite}}

There is no such thing as innocence, only varying degrees of guilt.\\
- Warhammer 40K

Never stop fighting for what's right, and never stop making sure what you are fighting for is in fact right.\\
- I dunno probably some smart guy, I read it on a Cracked article

[[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking "I'm drunk, you don't have an excuse!"]]\\
- Demoman, Team Fortress 2

[[folder:Almariffic Movies]]
* {{Stand By Me}}
* The [=ABCs=] of Death
* {{TRON}} and {{TRON Legacy}}
* {{The Godfather}}
* {{The Exorcist}}
* {{Heavy Metal}}
* {{Creepshow}}
* {{The Black Cauldron}}
* {{The Brave Little Toaster}}
* {{Hellraiser}}
* {{Total Recall}} (The original)
* {{Ferngully The Last Rainforest}}
* {{Super Mario Bros}} (Yes, THAT one)
* {{The Lawnmower Man}}
* {{The Grudge}} (The American one)
* {{The Ring}} (Again, the American one)
* {{The Princess and the Goblin}}
* {{The Swan Princess}}
* {{Tank Girl}}
* {{Johnny Mnemonic}}
* {{Titan AE}}
* {{Quest for Camelot}}
* {{Jeepers Creepers}}
* {{Starship Troopers}}
* {{Mimic}}
* {{Cube}}
* {{Event Horizon}}
* {{Lake Placid}}
* {{Atlantis The Lost Empire}}
* {{Equilibrium}}
* {{Eight Legged Freaks}}
* The {{Predator}} films
* The {{Alien}} films
* {{Black Swan}}
* {{District 9}}
* The {{Shrek}} films
* {{Nine}} (With the puppet dudes)
* {{Thor}}
* {{The Avengers}}
* {{The Thing}} (All versions: {{The Thing from Another World}}, John Carpenter's, and 2011 remake... I mean, PREQUEL)
* {{Prince of Darkness}}
* {{The Blob}} (1980s)
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Almariffic Games]]
* {{Spore}}
* The {{Mass Effect}} series
* The {{Halo}} series
* The {{Dead Space}} series
* The {{Fallout}} series
* {{The Elder Scrolls V Skyrim}}
* The {{Resident Evil}} series
* The {{Metroid}} series
* The {{Tomb Raider}} series
* {{The Sims 3}}
* {{Far Cry 3}}
* Popcap: {{Plants vs Zombies}}, {{Bejeweled}}, {{Bookworm Adventures}}
* The {{Crysis}} series
* {{Deus Ex}} and {{Deus Ex Human Revolution}}
* {{System Shock 2}}
* The {{Bioshock}} series
* {{Left 4 Dead 2}}
* [[FirstEncounterAssaultRecon F.E.A.R.]] (Yes, I'm THAT Alma.)
* {{Doom 3}}
* {{Penny Arcade Adventures}}
* {{MediEvil}}
* {{Mischief Makers}}
* The {{Legend of Zelda}} series
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Books I've Read]]
As of creating this profile, and ones from recent memory.

->-- Robopocalypse [[subscript:(Daniel H. Wilson)]]
->-- Heir to the Empire [[subscript:(Timothy Zahn)]]
->-- Dark Force Rising [[subscript:(Timothy Zahn)]]
->-- Wuthering Heights [[subscript:(Emily Brontë)]]
->-- World War Z [[subscript:(Max Brooks)]]
->-- Neuromancer [[subscript:(William Gibson)]]
->-- Amped [[subscript:(Daniel H. Wilson)]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Books I Will Read (I Swear)]]
->-- Consider Phlebas [[subscript:(Iain M. Banks)]]
->-- The Player of Games [[subscript:(Iain M. Banks)]]
->-- Use of Weapons [[subscript:(Iain M. Banks)]]
->-- Mass Effect: Revelation [[subscript:(Drew Karpyshyn)]]
->-- Mass Effect: Ascension [[subscript:(Drew Karpyshyn)]]
->-- Mass Effect: Retribution [[subscript:(Drew Karpyshyn)]]
->-- Mass Effect: Deception [[subscript:(William C. Dietz)]]
->-- Supernatural: Nevermore [[subscript:(Keith R. A. DeCandido)]]
->-- Supernatural: Bobby Singer's Guide to Hunting [[subscript:(David Reed)]]
->-- The Right to Arm Bears [[subscript:(Gordon R. Dickson)]]
->-- The Host [[subscript:(Stephenie Meyer)]] (WHAT I THOUGHT IT SOUNDED LIKE IT COULD ACTUALLY BE GOOD)
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Almariffic Tropes]]
A work in progress.

* {{Nightmare Fetishist}}. -- To the ''nth'' degree. I sometimes worry that I scare people with my interest in the macabre, but I wouldn't have it any other way.
* {{Fan Girl}} -- Of many things, but perhaps most prominently the {{FEAR}} series, from which I take my name.
* {{Blood Knight}} -- And a credit to your team, until I accidentally kill one of you in my eagerness to slaughter zombies.
* [[HarryPotter Slytherin]] -- Snake girls fuck on the first date.
* {{Hair of Gold}}, {{Brown Eyes}}
* [[TheLegendOfKorra Metalbender]]
* {{Introversion Tropes}} -- I run the gamut of these; from {{Bookworm}} to {{Hates Small Talk}} to {{The Hermit}}. Sometimes, I may appear extroverted; and indeed, I'm not completely allergic to social interaction; but don't expect me to be the {{Life of the Party}}. (LOOKIT ME I'M USING SEMI-COLONS I'M SO SMRT HERP DERP.) I'm the kind who prefers an intellectual conversation with one or a few people to a big gathering. May be a {{Tsundere}}; exhibits strong signs of being a {{Kuudere}}. {{Absent Minded Professor}} has been evoked word-for-word by people close to me. Now that I've finished explaining the finer points of M-theory, can you tell me where I left my socks?
** '''EDIT:''' I appear to be the opposite of this on TV Tropes. This requires further research.
* {{Ninja Editor}} / {{Serial Tweaker}} -- To a truly pitiful degree. Don't be surprised if that post about video games I wrote two minutes is now an essay-length screed about horticulture.
* [[FourTemperamentEnsemble Melancholic/Choleric]] -- With plenty of see-sawing between the two.
* [[WesternZodiac Aquarian]] [[EasternZodiac Monkey]]
* {{Sir Swears A Lot}} -- I really don't mean to be uncouth but at this point swearing is an inextricable part of my vocabulary. Fuck.
* {{Crazy Cat Lady}} -- Gentlemen (and ladies) prefer cats.
* {{No Indoor Voice}} -- Being a bit hard of hearing will do that to you...
* {{Cloudcuckoolander}} and {{The Loonie}} -- According to others!
* {{Catch Phrase}} -- "You numpty" appears to be becoming this.
[[/folder]]

->-- The Host [[subscript:(Stephenie Meyer)]]

* {{Nightmare Fetishist}}. -- To the ''nth'' degree. I love the macabre with an almost sexual intensity. Mostly, it just means I watch a lot of horror movies. Horror filmmakers these days are so lacking in imagination... Remember when we were all grossed out by the spider-legged head in {{The Thing}}? Couldn't the world be improved by ''more'' spider-legged heads?

* {{Blood Knight}} -- I'm a persistent accidental team killer in Left 4 Dead. Get out of the way of my bullets!
* [[HarryPotter Slytherin]] -- Not technically a trope, but I'm including it anyway. Depending on my mood, I lean more on Gryffindor or Slytherin, but I consider myself a snake. Anything but [[HufflepuffHouse Hufflepuff]].

* [[ExtraOreDinary Metalbender]] -- Firebenders are the Gryffindors of the Avatar 'verse. I'm an earth/metalbender--this according to the numerous totally scientific personality quizzes I took online because I didn't have anything better to do with my time.

* {{Sir Swears A Lot}} -- I'm told it's very unladylike.
* {{Crazy Cat Lady}} -- Gentlemen (and ladies) prefer cats, and nothing explains why better than [[http://www.psy-q.ch/lovecraft/html/catsdogs.htm this essay]] by Lovecraft.
* {{No Indoor Voice}} -- In real life and online, though in the former case it's because I live with a parent who is quite hard of hearing.

This stuff's important. I'm working on a novel, and these are the threads I've made about or in which I've asked questions to do with the work. Thank you, TV Tropes, for already helping me to become a better writer. If I pull this thing off, you guys are definitely getting a mention in the foreword.

"What the heck is your avatar?"\\
- @/TairaMai, as per my vandalisms folder below. If you're not very confused and/or frightened by my avatar, you are talking to an imposter.

[[quoteright:350:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/avatarcollage4_238.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:350:I like things: Cool things, badass things, funny things, cute things, scary things, weird things, creepy things, nerdy things, beautiful things, sexy things, elegant things, funky things, gruesome things, dark things...]]

->'''Spinnerette:''' ''Of course! Just think of Greta's bosom as Gollum and Jar Jar Binks doing a dance routine!''
->'''Mecha Maid:''' ''That sounds terrifying.''
->-- ''{{Spinnerette}}'', [[http://www.spinnyverse.com/2011/11/18/11182011/ Nov 18, 2011]]

-> "Attention shoppers, we have a special... ON DEATH!"
-> -- '''Richtofen''', ''{{Nazi Zombies}}''

----
'''HELLO AND WELCOME to the Big Beautiful Bio of the Queen of the Internet, Alma! Your Majesty is 21 in Earth years and assumes the form of a female of the species ''Homo sapiens'' [[AFormYouAreComfortableWith for your comfort and convenience]], as shown to the right. Sit back, relax, and receive the wisdom of Her Highness in Internet-based textual glory.'''
----

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!@@Alma Fax and Faves:@@

'''Human Alias:''' Jordie\\
'''Location:''' Perth, Western Australia\\
'''Favourite Colour:''' Yellow\\
'''Favourite Earth Animal:''' [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tardigrade Water bear]] (Hey, they can be [[http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/65/Hypsibiusdujardini.jpg really cute]]!)\\
'''Favouite Human Music:''' Metal, mostly in the [[MohsScaleOfRockAndMetalHardness 10-11 range]].\\
'''Favourite Cartoon:''' [[SpongebobSquarepants Spongeboob Squarepenis]] (You're welcome for the idea, porno parody producers.)\\
'''Favourite [[http://www.giantmicrobes.com/au Giant Microbe]]:''' [[http://www.giantmicrobes.com/au/products/copepod.html Copepod]] (Aside from the [[http://www.giantmicrobes.com/au/products/waterbear.html Water Bear]], of course.)\\
'''Favourite Book:''' {{Treasure Island}}\\
'''Favourite Star Wars Alien:''' [[SpaceJews Toydarians]]. Just kidding--Twi'leks and Chiss.\\
'''Favourite Superhero:''' [[http://www.spinnyverse.com Spinnerette]]
----

----
'''Characters and works in the Avatar Collage (to the right), in order of appearance:''' [[TombRaider Lara Croft]], [[MassEffect Femshep]] (posing as Rosie the Riveter), [[{{Reboot}} Hexadecimal]], [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Right_to_Arm_Bears The Right to Arm Bears]], [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erh2ngRZxs0 this fucking thing]], [[StarWars a Twi'lek]], [[{{Metroid}} Samus]], a bear, more bears, [[SpongebobSquarepants Patrick]], [[http://www.sorayama.net a sexy Sorayama robot]], {{Tank Girl}}, [[http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com.au/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html the alot]], [[ResidentEvil Alice]] (from the films), [[IronMaiden Eddie]], [[{{Gargoyles}} Demona]], [[{{Predator}} a female Predator]], [[{{Animorphs}} a geeky Andalite]], [[FinalFight Poison]], [[TronLegacy Quorra]], [[TheSarahConnorChronicles Cameron]], [[http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/confession-bear Confession Bear]], {{Grace Kelly}}, a cool T-Rex, [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nemesis_%28mythology%29 Nemesis]], a piece by {{Wayne Barlowe}}, a cat with a thing for bondage, [[{{Fallout1}} The Master]], {{Galaxy of Terror}}, {{She Hulk}}, a warrior angel, [[{{Avatar}} Neytiri]], [[GorgeousGorgon Medusa]], [[HinduMythology the fierce and beautiful Kali]], [[ResidentEvil Wesker]].

->'''I use many pictures I find on my Google and Deviantart searches as avatars. If I've used some art of yours and you're not happy with this, or would just like to be credited, give me a bell on Facebook or my email address--2012jordie@gmail.com. I would be more than happy to remove or provide credit for the avatar(s) in question. I mean no harm, I just like awesome avatars. :)'''
----

A work in progress. Feel free to add ones you think apply--just don't be an asshole, and sign your name so I know who's contributed!

[[/folder]]

[[folder:A place where you guys can do that vandalism thingy I've seen on other people's profiles... Ya know, if you wanna...]]

* It's true, dear madam, that there's never enough things that go bump at night. ~ @/{{betterthanstrawberry}}
* What the heck is your avatar? 0.o ~ @/{{TairaMai}}
* What did you do to poor Becket? :| - @/{{kay4today}}
* Pleased to meet you. -Tropers/MokonaZero
* You're so cool. I like you. --Tropers/YinHachiko
* Say, how'd you even end up in my web anyway? - @/{{OrangeSpider}}
* You're attempting to sway Hope to the boob side. In my books, that makes you pretty awesome - @/{{Phoenixor}}
* Alma, you have moxxy. I can dig that. - @/{{TopographicOcean}} [[spoiler:Also, I second @/{{Phoenixor}} XD]]
* Hey, fellow attractive writer and fetishist of nightmares. - @/{{VolatileChills}}
* -vandalizes- --@/{{Immi}}
* O hai {{hermiethefrog}}
* -insert vandalization here- -- [[@/{{Boxen}} Vandal name here]]
* Is this the wrong and inappropriate place to tell you that you're really beautiful in that picture? Probably. I'll do it anyway. ~ @/{{Montmorencey}}
* Hello pretty Perth lady. c: -@/{{Nerd Bird}}
* Hi. hm... -{{Tropers/Passerby}}
* Hi! Vandalized in a polite manner. - @/{{Quag15}}
* Returning the love <3 -- @/PeacefulApocalypse
* You will never win the vandalize the troper page game!-{{Tropers/Wildcard}}
* Don't think I've vandalized here either (well, there's the army bit, but that doesn't count...) Don't worry about that lack of limerick on my page, because I don't know any off the top of my head for this either... --@/EarlOfSandvich
* A brofist is not complete without both bros! (ó ì_í)=óò=(ì_í ò) ''And lo, we are bros~'' - [[@/{{TopographicOcean}} Topsy]]
* Slenderalma's gonna grab us with her tentacles and hug us. -{{Tropers/Hermiethefrog}}
* Hello, silly and slightly crazy fun person. -@/MurkyMuse

[[folder:Alma's Army]]
Like what you see? Then add yourself! All we ask is your soul.
* @/ThatOneGuyNamedX: I added myself on top for obvious reasons ;) you may refer to me as Field Martial X. Or Mommy, whichever works. Also, I want the dress from down there.
* @/{{TopographicOcean}} : Is it ''any'' surprise that I would be the first to join? When do we get the uniforms? I wanna feel sexeh in mah military dress...
** @/{{Alma}}: [[http://s500ec6291f47d.img.gostorego.com/802754/cdn/media/s5/00/ec/62/91/f4/7d/catalog/product/cache/1/image/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/m/i/military_mini_dress_1.jpg Your military dress.]] You're welcome~
*** [[@/{{TopographicOcean}} Topo]]: ... I approve.
* @/DhanaRagnarok : Because every army needs its creepy MadScientist. Or that psycho who charges into the fray with a kilt and a claymore. I can multitask.
* @/EarlOfSandvich: [[IKnowMortalKombat The 200+ hours I spent playing Team Fortress 2 can be of use]]... plus I can supply sandviches.
* @/DiurnalBrocolli: I have an army of Pokemon... Think I am of any use?
* @/{{Nerd Bird}}: Can I have a super-awesome sparkly transformation sequence? With a wand? And a frilly outfit? :D
* @/MrMallard: I WILL WADDLE OVER THE CORPSES AND STEAL THEIR BREAD.
* @/{{Mark Von Lewis}} (Alma: Although he was too lazy to add himself, he assures me he is in expert in erections. Of antenna masts. AND DICKS. Either way, he would be a valuable addition to my army.)
* @/{{Irene}}: I'm the distraction. Who doesn't love a good pussy? *meows*
* @/{{Boxen}}: Huehuehuehuehuehuehuehue~
* @/TheMike: Certified RedShirt. ''-salute-'' [[spoiler:Can I be a MagicalGirl with Nerd Bird? :D]]
* @/T448Eight: Those filthy Circlieniens are next...
[[/folder]]

'''''[[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TroperWall/Alma I HAVE A TROPER WALL NOW. GO VANDALIZE THAT SHIT. BUT BE NICE.]]''''