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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS1E5TheEnemyWithin The Enemy Within]]]]
* Poor Janice, assaulted and hunched up crying afterwards, while “good”/whole Kirk mostly just wants to pretend it never happened, and Spock gets snarky that “evil” Kirk must have had “interesting qualities”.



* It’s the (produced) episode before we figure out ''[[StarTrekS1E13TheConscienceOfTheKing why]]'', but what’s happening (a group of people left alone after a “clean” massacre, food running out, assumes that kids just want protection and comfort) is clearly CloseToHome to Kirk. Sure “no more blah blah blah!” is ridiculous, but in context he’s desperately begging the kids to listen and is losing his mind.

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* It’s the (produced) episode before we figure out ''[[StarTrekS1E13TheConscienceOfTheKing ''[[Recap/StarTrekS1E13TheConscienceOfTheKing why]]'', but what’s happening (a group of people left alone after a “clean” massacre, food running out, assumes that kids just want protection and comfort) is clearly CloseToHome to Kirk. Sure “no more blah blah blah!” is ridiculous, but in context he’s desperately begging the kids to listen and is losing his mind.
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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS3E7DayOfTheDove Day Of The Dove]]]]
* Spock’s reaction to Scott freaking out on him with slurs is TranquilFury, but when Kirk starts to call him half human, he looks heartbroken.
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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS3E17ThatWhichSurvives That Which Survives]]]]
* Losira turns out to be a SoleSurvivor, with her people dead from an illness and waiting for a ship that never came, apologising that all that is left is a recording. The boys mourn her, calling her remarkable.
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* Kirk’s moment of looking around the chapel, hurting and a little lost (the bio has it as understanding he has to be a MartyrWithoutACause, helping others and never being able to rest), before he too has to go back to work.
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* In a deleted but still deemed canon scene, Kirk talks to his nephew Peter about his future, and tells Scotty that he actually hopes Peter doesn’t enter the academy, not wanting him to have to make the choice of killing everyone like Kirk would have done as a last resort. You get the sense (even more so than the original episode) that Tarsus comparisons are on his mind.
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* Outpost 4 being disintegrated, and the looks on Kirk’s, Uhura’s and Spock’s faces ranging from heartbroken to horrified (or as much as a Vulcan is willing to show).
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* Kirk, Spock and [=McCoy=] all act like they’ve been abused after the first bout of MindRape. They’re angry and hurt and very quiet about it, especially Spock, who needs reassurance that Kirk is alright and says he has to control his rage -- [[NotSoStoic right before breaking a vase he's holding]]. Alexander’s rage after realising it’s not him to blame but the Platonians, is also affecting.

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* Kirk, Spock and [=McCoy=] all act like they’ve been abused after the first bout of MindRape. They’re angry and hurt and very quiet about it, especially Spock, who needs reassurance that Kirk is alright and says he has to control his rage -- [[NotSoStoic right before breaking a vase he's holding]]. Alexander’s rage after realising it’s not him to blame but the Platonians, is also affecting.
affecting.#
* The Platonians force Christine and Spock to kiss, who apologise to each other for what’s about to happen, and then Uhura and Kirk, the former of whom felt safer when the Captain was around, until now.
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* Kirk’s heartbreaking puppy eyes when he lets Bones know about the USS Farrugut. Bones knows the situation is serious, because he actually calls the other man “Captain” instead of Jim.
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* Kirk is clearly hurt by Janet, the fact that their relationship ended and trying again won’t solve anything, plus how she’s into him when he’s rapidly aging, something he’s already not dealing with well.
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* The last of the dying from old age patients goes, and Kirk tries to console with “you did what you could”, but Bones morosely responds “which adds up to absolutely nothing”.
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* Kirk’s own breakdown, how he thinks of himself as just an extension of the ship, masochistically in love with it, and all he wants is a few days rest. It’ll be a long-running trend for him, and when Scotty comes in, he brokenly pleads for help.
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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS1E22SpaceSeed Space Seed]]]]
* When Khan cuts off the air to the bridge, Kirk is the last to go, commending all his officers and taking [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone full responsibility]] for underestimating Khan and putting them all in danger before passing out.
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* Kirk’s bio mixes some ArcWelding with a CerebusRetcon, with Kirk not sending David a both sad and eager to please [[https://64.media.tumblr.com/9bc1ab06dd6c148c050e27e72ef381bf/1b2fa744d6d84bd1-ad/s1280x1920/613a4483230bc93871e65da647413f9d59f69911.jpg letter]] about how he met a little boy who reminded him of his son that he’s never met.
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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS2E9Metamorphosis Metamorphosis]]]]
* Even without the movies having him act like Spock is a part of him, and the noblest half of himself, Kirk’s face during the “is he though he were a part of you” speech looks unbearably like a heartbroken puppy.
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Dewicking NotSoDifferent per TRS


* Spock's second mind-meld with the Horta, which reveals [[MonsterIsAMommy its motives.]] The utter brokenness in [[TheStoic the Vulcan's]] voice as he channels the Horta's grief and her [[DeathSeeker resignation to death]] now that she's failed her children and her species sells it. It doesn't help that this is NotSoDifferent from the reactions of the episode's humanoids to what they perceived as an unprovoked attack on their people.

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* Spock's second mind-meld with the Horta, which reveals [[MonsterIsAMommy its motives.]] The utter brokenness in [[TheStoic the Vulcan's]] voice as he channels the Horta's grief and her [[DeathSeeker resignation to death]] now that she's failed her children and her species sells it. It doesn't help that this is NotSoDifferent not so different from the reactions of the episode's humanoids to what they perceived as an unprovoked attack on their people.
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* Kirk blames himself for letting Gary go as far as he did, and trudges off with the massive gun to try and stop him.

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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS1E8Miri Miri]]

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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS1E8Miri Miri]]Miri]]]]


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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS1E9DaggerOfTheMind Dagger Of The Mind]]]]
* The ending is a sombre one, with Kirk getting a strong bout of MindRape (including being made to believe he had sex with Helen instead of just a dance), and trying to reassure Bones and Spock that he’s okay, but his smile slips when they can’t see.
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* Kirk’s bio decides to drive in the knife even harder, showing a [[https://64.media.tumblr.com/eda8453cf324871216fa986785319f3e/1b2fa744d6d84bd1-81/s1280x1920/d967f7c3a30e6405e95ede0c1997567786f4bc84.jpg photobooth strip]] of him and Edith looking very much in love.
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according to the transcript side that has production numbers anyway

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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS1E8Miri Miri]]
* It’s the (produced) episode before we figure out ''[[StarTrekS1E13TheConscienceOfTheKing why]]'', but what’s happening (a group of people left alone after a “clean” massacre, food running out, assumes that kids just want protection and comfort) is clearly CloseToHome to Kirk. Sure “no more blah blah blah!” is ridiculous, but in context he’s desperately begging the kids to listen and is losing his mind.
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* As funny as Spock curb stomping Kirk is, he’s hurt by all that was said, and is saddened that he doesn’t belong anymore.

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* As funny as Spock curb stomping Kirk is, he’s hurt by all that was said, and is saddened that he doesn’t belong anymore. Kirk seems to realize this, given that he said delivering that speech hurt, and not just because it drove Spock to use him as a punching bag.

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* As funny as Spock curb stomping Kirk is, he’s hurt by all that was said, and is saddened that he doesn’t belong anymore.
-->'''Spock''': If there are self made purgatories, then we all have to live in them. Mine can be no worse than someone else’s.
* Kirk after being mutinied against, realising just how big the ship is when you’re alone (and with the camera’s long shot, looking so ''small''), and after a whole episode of not being affected by the spores, [[DrivenToSuicide lets himself be taken]] after not knowing what he can offer against paradise.
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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS2E22ByAnyOtherName By Any Other Name]] ]]
* Rojan decides Kirk’s punishment for trying to escape is killing the {{red shirt}}s, because Kirk cares less about his own life than those under his command, and Kirk just looks so anxious and helpless.
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* There’s a case of mass insanity on Deneva, and Kirk tries desperately to get there before his brother succumbs to it or dies. He’s too late, and he only has time to slump against the wall before duty calls again. The bio has the twofer of Edith’s death and his brother’s death breaking him, making him more co-dependent on Spock and Bones.

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* It's a small moment, but when Kirk finally catches the strange figure following the crew around the EverythingTryingToKillYou forest, he grabs him and punches that sorry bastard right in the face. And the poor guy is ''horrified'' and starts crying because, as it turns out, violence just isn't a thing on this planet. An apologetic Kirk immediately has to reassure him that they come in peace.

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* It's a small moment, but when Kirk finally catches the strange figure following the crew around the EverythingTryingToKillYou forest, he grabs him and punches that sorry bastard right in the face. And the poor guy is ''horrified'' and starts crying because, as it turns out, violence just isn't a thing on this planet. An apologetic Kirk immediately has to reassure reassures him that they come in peace.



* After Chekov’s death, Kirk (as ever) blames himself, while Bones tries to reassure him that they all knew what they were signing up for when they joined the service, and Spock nearly comes to blows with Bones and Scotty when they accuse him of not feeling anything. Kirk tries to break it up, and Spock says evenly that they forget he’s half human. Cue regretful looks from Scotty and Bones.

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* After Chekov’s death, Kirk (as ever) blames himself, while Bones tries to reassure him that they all knew what they were signing up for when they joined the service, and Spock nearly comes to blows with Bones and Scotty when they accuse him of not feeling anything. Kirk tries to break it up, and but Spock says passes off their reactions, saying evenly that they forget he’s half human. Cue regretful looks from Scotty and Bones.



* Kirk, Spock and [=McCoy=] all act like they’ve been abused after the first bout of MindRape. They’re angry and hurt and very quiet about it, especially Spock, who needs reassurance that Kirk is alright and says he has to control his rage while breaking a vase. Alexander’s rage after realising it’s not him to blame but the Platonians, is also affecting.

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* Kirk, Spock and [=McCoy=] all act like they’ve been abused after the first bout of MindRape. They’re angry and hurt and very quiet about it, especially Spock, who needs reassurance that Kirk is alright and says he has to control his rage while -- [[NotSoStoic right before breaking a vase.vase he's holding]]. Alexander’s rage after realising it’s not him to blame but the Platonians, is also affecting.



* Kirk offers to let the Vians have him for their "experiment" if they let the others go, insisting on it against [=McCoy=]'s protests. Then, as Kirk watches the three walk off, secure in the knowledge that they'll be safe even though he will probably die, they vanish. Kirk helplessly demands what the Vians did with "[his] men" and yells at them [[YouSaidYouWouldLetThemGo that they said they needed one test subject]] .



* Kirk's helpless pleading with Bele to stay on board than pursuing Lokei. Kirk quietly saying "Bele" in a tone of absolute helplessness is heartwrenching.

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* Kirk's helpless pleading with Bele to stay on board than pursuing Lokei.Lokai. Kirk quietly saying "Bele" in a tone of absolute helplessness is heartwrenching.
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* In contrast and foreshadowing Kirk’s own scene of being tired, the Romulan commander is exhausted of all his comrades dying, and half-wishes for destruction before returning home.
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* When he’s being restrained by Guk, and Andrea is first told to kiss him then slap him, Kirk looks genuinely upset and shocked. HarsherInHindsight given how much Janice Lester seemed to like being stronger than him and hitting him.
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* After Bones finds out what “Dunsel” means, he comes to Kirk with drinks, and before he cheers the man up, Kirk is heartbreakingly accepting of the apparent fact that he’s been deemed useless and it’s not his ship anymore.
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[[AC: [[Recap/StarTrekS3E6SpectreOfTheGun Spectre Of The Gun]]]]
* After Chekov’s death, Kirk (as ever) blames himself, while Bones tries to reassure him that they all knew what they were signing up for when they joined the service, and Spock nearly comes to blows with Bones and Scotty when they accuse him of not feeling anything. Kirk tries to break it up, and Spock says evenly that they forget he’s half human. Cue regretful looks from Scotty and Bones.
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* [=McCoy=] tries to tell Kirk that the executive officer on the USS Farrugut didn’t blame him and called him brave, but Kirk is too deep in ItsAllMyFault to accept it.
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* Kirk’s BeneathTheMask speech, wanting to be on a long sea voyage somewhere, no [[HeroicSeductress frantic dancing]] or [[TheChainsOfCommanding responsibility]], and looks so worried and young when he asks Bones what if he’s wrong.

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