History Series / MYTHBUSTERS

-->'''Adam''': Is this awesome or what? We tripped all three of the [=ShockWatch=] stickers, which tells us something we often learn here at ''[=MythBusters=]'': Everyday objects can in fact be lethal [[SpaceWhaleAesop if Jamie builds a gun to shoot them]].

---> ''*[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OKPvKtEZr1A hammering loudly away on raincoats]]*''\\
'''Adam:''' Wait! Was that a guard? ''*listens while silent*''\\

''*[[WithCatlikeTread continues hammering]]*''

---> '''Redbeard the Savage:''' 'E's speechless!

---> '''Adam:''' He's got the giggles. That ''never'' happens!

--> '''Adam:''' So, can you clearly communicate what clever canine conundrum you're currently concocting?\\

'''Adam:''' *''amused with himself''* What's the myth?

---> '''Adam:''' This is the show. It's, like, 4 minutes of science, and then 10 minutes of me hurting myself.

--->'''Adam:''' *''surveying CD-ROM shrapnel embedded in ballistics gel blocks''* Look -- it's embedded two inches into his flesh! That's bad!

--->'''Adam:''' *''seeing that the GFCI switch on a hairdryer has not tripped in the tub''* What kind of ground-fault interruption is ''this''! It's ''pumping water''! [[CaptainObvious I would say that's bad]]!

-->'''Tory''': "My pants blew up!" That's what I'd say!

---> '''Adam''': You're suggesting we get acting lessons.\\
'''Jamie''': Isn't it about time?

--> ''[Stock footage of a hammerhead shark.]''\\

''[Shot transitions to footage of the [[{{Pun}} Hammer vs. Hammer]] testing.]''\\

* BornAsAnAdult: Joked about during the Bikes and Bazookas episode when Adam designs a supposedly efficent motorcycle cover:
--> Adam: As a kid, I would have killed for one of these. Were you ever a kid?
--> Jamie: No.

--->'''Adam''': Ladies and gentlemen, ''they are made of brass,'' Mr. Jamie Hyneman.

---> '''Pilot''': *''while cruising at 70,000 feet''* What do you think about landing after this commercial break?

--> '''Jamie''': We smashed it, we burned it, we smashed it ''and'' burned it.

---> '''Tory:''' We've still got like 500 pounds of this stuff, should we try again?\\

--->'''Adam:''' WHOA! *''in quiet, timid-ish voice''* Okay... is everybody okay?\\

---> '''Jamie:''' Do you need to go to the bathroom or anything?\\

--> '''Adam:''' For those of you who thought Jamie's attire was bulletproof...myth ''busted''.

---> '''Adam:''' This is the show. It's, like, 4 minutes of science, and then 10 minutes of me hurting myself.

--->*sniffs the air* "Aah, it's a beautiful day for ''science''."\\
'''Adam''': I ate a radio for science!

-->'''Scottie''': Let's egg him on until he hurts himself. That's always fun.[[note]]They did, he did (not seriously), and it was.[[/note]]

--> '''Jamie:''' So you're saying that Buster needs to be made out of depleted uranium.
--> '''Adam:''' *''beat''* Do we have some of that here? Is it under "D" or "U"?

---> '''Jamie''': You gotta collect those skills to be ready for anything.

--> '''Alton Brown:''' *''while lying underneath a car and poking at the engine''* "[[Film/DieHard "Come out to the coast, we'll have some fun]]..."

-->'''Kari''': Your idea of a safe stop is to ''shank me''?\\
'''Tory''': More like harpooning.

--->'''Adam''': If I find out that any of you tried this at home, I'll personally come to your house and kick your butt.

--> '''Kari''': (''attempting to describe Viagra which was used for one myth'') I'm trying to dance around how to say this, because families might have their kids watching. Um, "Santa's little helper"? "Daddy's little helper"? Maybe "Momma's little helper"?

--->'''Jamie''': So what you're saying is if you take the balls off, it don't work no more.

--->'''Adam''': Just thinking this one through from a mechanical standpoint...I'd be totally pleased with 2 inches of penetration.\\
'''Jamie''': Generally, I prefer a little bit more...

--->'''Narrator (about a giraffe)''': She's just not taking Adam's banana... which isn't surprising.

-->'''Kari''': Why is it that I am a grown woman and boys are ''still'' trying to make me eat bugs?

---> '''Grant:''' I feel kind of bad now. This was its home.

--->'''Grant:''' [''upon realizing he lost track of the mice''] OhCrap! Where did you go? WHERE DID YOU GO?

---> '''Adam:''' You've made a refrigerator!

---> '''Grant:''' Only on ''[=MythBusters=]''.

---> '''Adam:''' This is the biggest fail we have ''ever'' achieved!

-->'''Narrator''': And in the pouch will be... let's call it 'genetic legacy'.\\
'''Jamie''': Genetic legacy? It's ''sperm''. Every kid in grade school knows that. Helps make babies, you know?

-->'''Jamie''': Did I ever tell you that I worked as a concrete inspector for several months up in Seattle? \\
'''Adam''': Was this before or after you were the big animal veterinarian for the circus? \\
'''Jamie''': No, I never did that. You must be mistaken.

--->'''Adam''': Does this remind you of when you used to count money for the mob? \\
'''Jamie''': [[DeadpanSnarker I was a hitman, I wasn't a money counter.]]

---> '''Adam''': Anticlimactically enough, I believe I've disabled the entire mechanism by removing this simple pin.

--> '''Adam''': How would you like us to be remembered?\\
'''Jamie''': How about for the promotion of critical thought?\\
'''Adam''': And how do you think we ''will'' be remembered?\\
'''Jamie''': For blowing crap up.

** One might contend that that too is science, albeit in an [[VideoGame/{{Portal}} Aperture-inspired]] manner.

--> '''Tory:''' I am ''so'' glad I overdid the padding now.

-->'''Adam''': The only things we can't do are burn 'em, blow 'em up, or lose 'em.\\
'''Tory''': Has he ''watched the show?''

-->'''Adam''': I think somebody owes me ten thousand bucks.

--->'''Adam''': They're gonna cut back to me saying, "In six hours Jamie's still gonna be messing with this while we're all just kicking back." *cut* "About six hours from now, Jamie's still gonna be trying to find his needles while we're all kicking back sipping mimosas in the shade."

--->'''Adam''': I think we're gonna need a ''smaller scale''!

--> '''Adam''' [''Dangling upside-down, caught in a mesh net from the giant "helium raft"'']: This wins as the strangest position I've ever been in...on this show.\\
'''Kari''': Don't you love how he qualifies it with "''on this show''"?

-->'''Kari''': Oh, Newton's Laws! We forgot the Newton's Laws!\\
'''Narrator''': ''Oh, you mean the one that says that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction?''\\
'''Tory''': You know, we did a lot of experiments on this show, things have gone wrong, but that's the first time that I've ever felt that much danger.

---> I didn't do the engineering, and I didn't do the math, because I thought I understood what was going on and I thought I made a good rig. But I was wrong. I should have done it.

--->'''Grant''': [while unsheathing the blade] Decapitation hazard, everybody!

---> I thought I could make it. They said I made it.\\
'''Kari''': That was ''clearly'' {{sarcasm|Mode}}.

-->'''Adam''': Are you willing to drive through our course being led by a drunken Jamie?\\
'''Jerry''': Sure, as long as I can take a shot of that bottle when we're done.

--->'''Adam''': These things are ''always'' catching on fire!

-->'''Adam''': I'm sitting in a bunker looking out at a Chinese dressed crash test dummy sitting on 70 pounds of gunpowder... sorry, I just had one of those "mythbuster" moments.

--->'''Adam''': With all the safety precautions we are taking, check this, check that, you have to stand back and say: Damn! I'm lightin' salamis, man! I'm making a rocket out of meat!

--> '''Jamie:''' Why do we always park on the other side of the hill?\\

--> '''Adam''': I wouldn't say Jamie's an evil genius... I'm not sure he's evil, and I'm not sure he's a genius, but, uh... *''laughs''*

---> '''Adam''': I love...consistent...DATA! HAHAHAHA!

---> '''Tory''': I present to you... my creation! Meat Man! AHAHAHA! [[note]]Ooh, I almost threw up.[[/note]]

---> '''Grant''': He's alive! ALIVE! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

---> '''Scottie''': Maybe it's a myth that methane is flammable.\\
'''Adam''': It's not a myth, we're just idiots.

---> '''Adam:''' If I were a different kind of person I'd hug you right now. *''pauses, then punches Jamie in the shoulder''*

--->'''Adam''': [''pointing to a .30-06 Springfield round''] This kills you... [''points to the .50 BMG round''] This kills you [[TheresNoKillLikeOverkill and everyone else in the room]].

--->'''Narrator''': How about that. A product that does [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin exactly what it says on the box]].

-->'''Tory''': What's on the other side of that berm?\\
'''Kari''': Uh oh.

-->'''Adam''': It's wedged in there like, I don't know if I could build something that could wedge it in there that hard... oh, apparently I did.

--> '''Tory:''' Can I elect ''not'' to do this? [[ButtMonkey This isn't funny anymore!]]

({{beat}})\\

--> '''Adam''': This! Is! ''[=SPARKY!=]''

--> '''Flavor text for Grant in one episode:''': ''Dreams of electric sheep''

--> '''Adam''': (''after being told that attaching rockets to a swing set was spectacular'') Well, hopefully, that's our job; to attach rockets to everything.

---> '''Grant''': In the name of [[ForScience science]], and all things cool, we're gonna do it anyway.

---> '''Grant''' Who wants to bet a car's going through a fence today?\\

---> '''Jamie:''' [[LampshadeHanging Is he doing his David Attenborough thing again?]]

---> '''Tory:''' "I can't believe they continue to rent these to us."

--> '''Adam''': In your face ''men''! ...oh.

--> '''Adam''': I only drink [=MythBusters=] brand cola!

--> '''Kari''': I add a half-ounce of *donkey noise* to a half-ounce of *rooster crow* ''slowly''.\\
'''Narrator''': And when you add donkey to rooster, you get a violent reaction!

---> '''Adam''': This ingredient is made of blur. Ha! And this has blur in it too. Blur is very dangerous. You don't wanna mix blur with blur.

--> '''Adam''': Remember, everyday objects can be made lethal if Jamie builds a cannon and shoots them at you.

'''Tory:''' *''drops it onto the table''*

-->'''[[TheNarrator Rob Lee]]''': Coming next on ''[=MythBusters=]'': Jamie's human emotion firmware requires an upgrade.

--> '''Jamie''': That's what we do here on ''[=MythBusters=]''! We blow [[SoundEffectBleep BLEEP]] up!\\
'''Tory''': It's ''[=MythBusters=]''. We haven't had an explosion yet. So...

--->'''Kari''': ''(applying the wax)'' How's that feel?\\
'''Tory''': ''(moments before having the hairs yanked out of his leg without benefit of anesthesia)'' It actually feels kinda good. What's so bad about waxing?

--->'''Adam''': Are you sure there's a bullet in there?\\
'''Jamie''': Yes, there's- *''bang''*

--->'''Adam''': Okay, we'd better start paying atten- *bang*

--> '''Rob Lee''': "[[RunningGag Ah, Houston... we have a problem.]]"

---> '''Grant''': ''[on the producers]'' They find your weakness. And they keep exploiting it! They ''push it''! Like a li'l button!

---> '''Adam:''' Now, the [[{{Pun}} box]] [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Box_jellyfish jellyfish]] is one of the most lethal foes you'll encounter in your average swimming pool. They prefer temperatures between 79 and 82 degrees, and they give a ''nasty'' sting. If you see one, just swim in the other direction, and remember: he's just as afraid of you.

--> '''Jamie:''' ...Franchise/{{Batman}}.\\

--->'''Jamie:'''''(seeing the doll buried under a mountain of luggage)'' You've gotta be kidding!
--->'''Kari:'''''(seeing the doll still outside the car)'' Really? You forgot the baby?!

* CompetencePorn: The show inspired generations of fans to get involved with engineering and other craftsman trades. Every Mythbuster had their own particular specialty but the biggest engagement with the show centered on them troubleshooting the mechanics of the myth and building a set-up to test it. StuffBlowingUp at the end helped too.

* CowTools: M-5 certainly qualifies, with one wall that spans almost the length of the main building (at least 75 feet) with shelves and cubbies to hold all sorts of things. Apparently Jamie doesn't like to throw anything away and the random trinkets do come in handy. Even lampshaded with lots of them having some strange labels, like the one labeled "RAW MEAT." Lampshaded in one episode, where Adam did some math[[note]]which he actually got wrong - once the math was redone correctly, a more reasonable mass figure was obtained[[/note]] to determine that Buster would have to have more mass in order to accurately portray the myth:

* EveryoneHasStandards: When it comes to animal experiments, they do draw the line if it involves anything above insects. Insects are fair game just as long as they were bred for science. Pig cadavers are a common practice since they're used as analogues in place of humans, but (in early episodes) the pigs had to have died of natural causes in order to be allowed. (The myths tested with ''those'' pigs involved the rotting process of a body, so whole carcasses, unmodified, were required for the best results. Later episodes got pigs from a slaughterhouse, albeit one that was--according to the hosts--relatively humane.) Ballistic gel models are also used and made to mimic the human form. And they flat-out refused to put a dog in a microwave.

* {{Keet}}: Adam, full stop.

* CanadaEh: When a myth involves Canada somehow, the jokes usually fall into this.