History Quotes / TheThickOfIt

28th Aug '16 3:16:37 AM erforce
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->''"This is like TheShawshankRedemption, only with more tunneling through shit and no fucking redemption."''

to:

->''"This is like TheShawshankRedemption, Film/TheShawshankRedemption, only with more tunneling through shit and no fucking redemption."''
19th Mar '16 11:30:07 AM TheAmazingBlachman
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->'''Julius:''' You've done some pretty awful things to me in my time, but this takes the bloody biscuit. And you've ''pissed'' on that biscuit, and ''I'''ve got to eat it! Well, here's the news, Malcolm: I will ''not'' eat the pissy biscuit!\\

to:

->'''Julius:''' You've done some pretty awful things to me in my time, but this takes the bloody biscuit. And you've ''pissed'' on that biscuit, and ''I'''ve ''I''[='ve=] got to eat it! Well, here's the news, Malcolm: I will ''not'' eat the pissy biscuit!\\
19th Mar '16 11:29:32 AM TheAmazingBlachman
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'''Malcolm:''' That's the one! It's like that, okay? You're gonna fucking kill all the bad guys and you'll be able to blow the big...\\

to:

'''Malcolm:''' That's the one! It's like that, okay? You're gonna fucking kill all the bad guys and you'll be able to blow up the big...\\



'''Malcolm:''' Death Star-thing! Then you can go and live happily ever after on the Planet of the Teddy Bears.\\

to:

'''Malcolm:''' Death Star-thing! ''Death Star-thing''! Then you can go and live happily ever after on the Planet of the Teddy Bears.\\
19th Mar '16 11:28:47 AM TheAmazingBlachman
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'''Malcolm''': Let's run some tits up the flagpole and see if anyone gets wood.\\

to:

'''Malcolm''': ->'''Malcolm''': Let's run some tits up the flagpole and see if anyone gets wood.\\
19th Mar '16 11:28:23 AM TheAmazingBlachman
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->'''Malcolm''': Let's run some tits up the flagpole and see if anyone gets wood.
->'''Nicola''': Christ, it's like being trapped in a fucking boys' toilet.

->'''Peter''': And speaking of rabies injections...
->'''Malcolm''': I didn't know you were still alive. How's the 80's tribute band? Still doing the Robert Palmer lookalike?
->'''Peter''': Malcolm. You're looking well... for someone twice your age. Any news on the aneurysm?

->'''Terri''': For your information, I have done nothing!
->'''Glenn''': That will be your epitaph, Terri.

->'''Nicola''': It's cause I'm the girl at the party no one wants to dance with. I'm the freak in the corner with a pint of cider and blackcurrant.
->'''Glenn''': We would still like to dance with you.
->'''Nicola''': Oh, fuck off and go and put your glasses back on. We all know you do that every time you walk in here.

->'''Peter''': The stupid one keeps staring at me.
->'''Phil''': That's because she's a mentalist and she loves you. If you ever crash your car in the mountains, she'll be the one waiting to pull you out! Have you seen ''{{Film/Misery}}''?
->'''Peter''': I'm at the fucking BBC, aren't I?

->'''Nicola''': You're about as on the ball today as a dead seal.
->'''Malcolm''': Hey, that's one of my fucking lines!

->'''Terri''': Okay, I'm going to take off my media hat.
->'''Nicola''': I honestly never thought you had one.

->'''Julius:''' You've done some pretty awful things to me in my time, but this takes the bloody biscuit. And you've ''pissed'' on that biscuit, and ''I'''ve got to eat it! Well, here's the news, Malcolm: I will ''not'' eat the pissy biscuit!
->'''Malcolm:''' SAM, NO PISSY BISCUITS!

->'''Robyn:''' Do you know, Malcolm? The best way to clear a paper jam?
->'''Malcolm:''' I don't know... Kill a kid an hour until it sorts itself out?

to:

->'''Malcolm''': '''Malcolm''': Let's run some tits up the flagpole and see if anyone gets wood.
->'''Nicola''':
wood.\\
'''Nicola''':
Christ, it's like being trapped in a fucking boys' toilet.

->'''Peter''': And speaking of rabies injections...
->'''Malcolm''':
injections...\\
'''Malcolm''':
I didn't know you were still alive. How's the 80's tribute band? Still doing the Robert Palmer lookalike?
->'''Peter''':
lookalike?\\
'''Peter''':
Malcolm. You're looking well... for someone twice your age. Any news on the aneurysm?

->'''Terri''': For your information, I have done nothing!
->'''Glenn''':
nothing!\\
'''Glenn''':
That will be your epitaph, Terri.

->'''Nicola''': It's cause I'm the girl at the party no one wants to dance with. I'm the freak in the corner with a pint of cider and blackcurrant.
->'''Glenn''':
blackcurrant.\\
'''Glenn''':
We would still like to dance with you.
->'''Nicola''':
you.\\
'''Nicola''':
Oh, fuck off and go and put your glasses back on. We all know you do that every time you walk in here.

->'''Peter''': The stupid one keeps staring at me.
->'''Phil''':
me.\\
'''Phil''':
That's because she's a mentalist and she loves you. If you ever crash your car in the mountains, she'll be the one waiting to pull you out! Have you seen ''{{Film/Misery}}''?
->'''Peter''':
''{{Film/Misery}}''?\\
'''Peter''':
I'm at the fucking BBC, aren't I?

->'''Nicola''': You're about as on the ball today as a dead seal.
->'''Malcolm''':
seal.\\
'''Malcolm''':
Hey, that's one of my fucking lines!

->'''Malcolm:''' What's that film that you love?\\
'''Ollie:''' What film?\\
'''Malcolm:''' The one about the fucking hairdresser. The space hairdresser and the cowboy. The guy's... He's got a tinfoil pal and a pedal bin. His father is a robot and he has ''fucking'' fucked his sister! ...LEGO! They're all made of fucking Lego!\\
'''Ollie:''' Franchise/StarWars?\\
'''Malcolm:''' That's the one! It's like that, okay? You're gonna fucking kill all the bad guys and you'll be able to blow the big...\\
'''Ollie:''' Death Star?\\
'''Malcolm:''' Death Star-thing! Then you can go and live happily ever after on the Planet of the Teddy Bears.\\
'''Ollie:''' Ewoks. They're Ewoks.

->'''Terri''': Okay, I'm going to take off my media hat.
->'''Nicola''':
hat.\\
'''Nicola''':
I honestly never thought you had one.

->'''Julius:''' You've done some pretty awful things to me in my time, but this takes the bloody biscuit. And you've ''pissed'' on that biscuit, and ''I'''ve got to eat it! Well, here's the news, Malcolm: I will ''not'' eat the pissy biscuit!
->'''Malcolm:'''
biscuit!\\
'''Malcolm:'''
SAM, NO PISSY BISCUITS!

->'''Robyn:''' Do you know, Malcolm? The best way to clear a paper jam?
->'''Malcolm:'''
jam?\\
'''Malcolm:'''
I don't know... Kill a kid an hour until it sorts itself out?
24th Oct '15 10:51:19 PM JamesAustin
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Added DiffLines:

->''"Does he understand the policy? Forgive my concern, but it's a bit like asking if a dog can grasp the concept of Norway."''
28th Sep '15 5:09:00 PM DragonartistJRR
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Added DiffLines:

->''"You know, I've spent the last ten years detoxifying this party. It's been a bit like renovating an old, old house. Oh, you can take out a sexist beam here, a callous window there, replace the odd...homophobic roof-tile, but after a while you begin to realize that this renovation is doomed. Because the foundation is built on what I can only describe as a solid bed of cunts."''
27th Dec '14 11:12:09 AM Patachou
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->''"Fucking hell! Fuck! Jesus, I'm not a joke, okay, all right, hello? I am a man. I am a man, you know, you know?! This, THIS!!!! THIS IS MY LIFE!!!! I'M A HUMAN BEING, AND ALL THIS IS MY LIFE!! And, it's collapsing in front of me. You know, Tom's lot, they're never going to want me, are they? And fucking Hugh, now, he... Jesus Christ, this is all, I AM A MAN!!!!!! AND, NO YOU DON'T, I'M IRRELEVANT!! NO, NO GO AWAY, I'm irrelevant, I'm irrelevant, I'm irrelevant! FUCKING HUGH JUST WANTS TO SPEAK TO TINKY WINKY?!! WELL FUCK TINKY WINKY, FUCK YOU TINKY WINKY!!! AUF WIEDERSEHEN, PET, THE PARTY'S OVER, GOODBYE YELLOW BRICK ROAD, WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT HITLER?! HE HAD A MOUSTACHE AND HE LIVED OVER THERE?!! FUCK US ALL!!!!"''

to:

->''"Fucking hell! Fuck! Jesus, I'm not a joke, okay, all right, hello? I am a man. I am a man, you know, you know?! This, THIS!!!! THIS IS MY LIFE!!!! I'M A HUMAN BEING, AND ALL THIS IS MY LIFE!! And, it's collapsing in front of me. You know, Tom's lot, they're never going to want me, are they? And fucking Hugh, now, he... Jesus Christ, this is all, I AM A MAN!!!!!! AND, NO YOU DON'T, I'M IRRELEVANT!! NO, NO GO AWAY, I'm irrelevant, I'm irrelevant, I'm irrelevant! FUCKING HUGH JUST WANTS TO SPEAK TO TINKY WINKY?!! WELL FUCK TINKY WINKY, FUCK YOU TINKY WINKY!!! AUF WIEDERSEHEN, PET, THE PARTY'S OVER, [[Music/GoodbyeYellowBrickRoad GOODBYE YELLOW BRICK ROAD, ROAD]], WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT HITLER?! HE HAD A MOUSTACHE AND HE LIVED OVER THERE?!! FUCK US ALL!!!!"''
25th Dec '14 11:08:32 PM nombretomado
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->'''Phil''': That's because she's a mentalist and she loves you. If you ever crash your car in the mountains, she'll be the one waiting to pull you out! Have you seen ''{{Misery}}''?

to:

->'''Phil''': That's because she's a mentalist and she loves you. If you ever crash your car in the mountains, she'll be the one waiting to pull you out! Have you seen ''{{Misery}}''?''{{Film/Misery}}''?
3rd Nov '14 12:51:10 PM SolipSchism
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->''"Iíve got a to-do list thatís longer than a fucking Leonard Cohen song."''

to:

->''"Iíve got a to-do list here thatís longer than a fucking Leonard Cohen song."''
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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Quotes.TheThickOfIt