History Main / TrojanGauntlet

26th Jul '17 2:20:45 PM ImperialMajestyXO
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* Inverted in an old joke: A man went into a job interview and his eye winked through the whole process. The interviewer said "Look, you are well qualified, but I'm afraid that facial tic will throw off clients." The man replied - "Funny you mention that, because all I have to do is take aspirin and the winking goes away - watch" and the man began dumping out his pockets looking for aspirin. In most of his pockets, however, were condoms. Finally, once a pile of condom packages of every sort piled up on the desk the man found two aspirin, took them, and the wink totally stopped. "Well, that worked," the interviewer admitted, but why do you have all the condoms? We don't want our clients to think you're a womanizer!" "It's quite simple sir," the guy said, "have you ever walked into a drugstore, winking like crazy, and asked for aspirin?"

to:

* Inverted in an old joke: A man went into a job interview and his eye winked through the whole process. The interviewer said "Look, you are well qualified, but I'm afraid that facial tic will throw off clients." The man replied - "Funny you mention that, because all I have to do is take aspirin and the winking goes away - watch" and the man began dumping out his pockets looking for aspirin. In most of his pockets, however, were condoms. Finally, once a pile of condom packages of every sort piled up on the desk the man found two aspirin, took them, and the wink totally stopped. "Well, that worked," the interviewer admitted, but "but why do you have all the condoms? We don't want our clients to think you're a womanizer!" "It's quite simple sir," the guy said, "have you ever walked into a drugstore, winking like crazy, and asked for aspirin?"
18th Jun '17 8:56:08 AM FurryKef
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* ''ComicBook/RedEars'': There's a gag where various men buy condoms from a female cashier. They don't know their own size, so she has to, ehm, manually check them by putting her hand down their pants, then broadcasting stuff on the loadspeaker like "Size XL! Isle 3!" or Size M Isle 3!". The punchline comes when an nervous teenager goes to buy condoms: "[[JizzedInMyPants Cleanup! Isle 3!]]"

to:

* ''ComicBook/RedEars'': There's a gag where various men buy condoms from a female cashier. They don't know their own size, so she has to, ehm, manually check them by putting her hand down their pants, then broadcasting stuff on the loadspeaker like "Size XL! Isle Aisle 3!" or Size M Isle "Size M! Aisle 3!". The punchline comes when an nervous teenager goes to buy condoms: "[[JizzedInMyPants Cleanup! Isle Aisle 3!]]"
26th Apr '17 6:37:01 AM DoctorNemesis
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Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms. For one, given that even in these more sexually permissive days sex is nevertheless still seen as a rather private and intimate affair, the more modest and shy among us might be at least a little uncomfortable knowing that at least one other person is going to know that sex is likely to be in their immediate future. So often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap. For comic effect, should the other items themselves be unfortunately or hastily chosen this may often lead to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick, which in turn will also provide the possibility for [[HilarityEnsues ensuing hilarity]] and comic misunderstandings.

to:

Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms. For one, given that even in these more sexually permissive days sex is nevertheless still seen as a rather private and intimate affair, the more modest and shy among us might be at least a little uncomfortable knowing that at least one other person complete stranger is going to know that sex is likely to be in their immediate future. So often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap. For comic effect, should the other items themselves be unfortunately or hastily chosen this may often lead to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick, which in turn will also provide the possibility for [[HilarityEnsues ensuing hilarity]] and comic misunderstandings.
31st Mar '17 4:23:04 AM Omeganian
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* There was an old ad (maybe condoms, maybe social) about a DecemberDecemberRomance couple wanting to purchase condoms and putting them among a large pharmacy order with all kind of medicine people of their age would be expected to buy. Once out of the pharmacy, they gleefully pull out the condoms and run away, leaving the rest of the order lying on the street.


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* The French social anti AIDS ad compilation ''3,000 Scenarios to Combat a Virus'' included [[http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7h26f_la-sirene-3000-scenarios-contre-un_shortfilms a short]] where a DecemberDecemberRomance couple needs condoms, so the man goes to the pharmacy and places the condoms in a large order of all kind of things a man his age would buy. Once out, he gleefully pulls the condoms out and they walk away, the rest of the order left in a rubbish bin. A variation of the "Blind Date" joke/urban legend is also part of the compilation.
31st Mar '17 12:27:24 AM Omeganian
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Added DiffLines:

* There was an old ad (maybe condoms, maybe social) about a DecemberDecemberRomance couple wanting to purchase condoms and putting them among a large pharmacy order with all kind of medicine people of their age would be expected to buy. Once out of the pharmacy, they gleefully pull out the condoms and run away, leaving the rest of the order lying on the street.
19th Mar '17 10:16:34 PM angie710
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Added DiffLines:

** They also did another variation for their "Dating: It's Complicated" series. A young college-aged couple are at a party, and they get drunk and fall asleep or pass out in one of the bedrooms. They wake up at about 3 AM, and begin making out...and the girl says she wants to have sex. Her boyfriend is excited because he's a virgin (well, [[TechnicalVirgin technically]])...but he unfortunately doesn't have any condoms with him. The girlfriend replies that she has a condom in her purse...which is locked in one of the other bedrooms. She sends him down the hall to get it, and he is unable to get into the room, ask for help, or pick the lock. He proposes a number of makeshift condom ideas [[NoodleImplements (balloons, beer bottle, plastic wrap)]], but [[WomenAreWiser his girlfriend shoots them all down.]] Then she asks him to go ask the apartment's owner for a condom, but he refuses because it's too awkward. So they decide to go with their old standby: the Everything But. [[ShaggyDogStory When they finish and turn on the lights, there's a brand-new box of condoms right on the bedside table]]...and the owner of the bed/apartment angrily kicking them out. When they finally ''do'' get the opportunity to go "all the way," [[AllPeriodsArePMS the girl is on her period and in a bad mood]].
3rd Jan '17 6:21:37 AM DoctorNemesis
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Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms. For one, given that even in these more sexually permissive days sex is nevertheless still seen as a rather private and intimate affair, the more modest and shy among us might be at least a little uncomfortable knowing that at least one other person is going to know that sex is likely to be in their immediate future. So often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap. For comic effect, should the other items themselves be unfortunately or hastily chosen this may often lead to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick, which in turn will also provide the possibility for [[HilarityEnsues ensuring hilarity]] and comic misunderstandings.

to:

Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms. For one, given that even in these more sexually permissive days sex is nevertheless still seen as a rather private and intimate affair, the more modest and shy among us might be at least a little uncomfortable knowing that at least one other person is going to know that sex is likely to be in their immediate future. So often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap. For comic effect, should the other items themselves be unfortunately or hastily chosen this may often lead to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick, which in turn will also provide the possibility for [[HilarityEnsues ensuring ensuing hilarity]] and comic misunderstandings.
3rd Jan '17 6:21:09 AM DoctorNemesis
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Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms. For one, given that even in these more sexually permissive days sex is nevertheless still seen as a rather private and intimate affair, the more modest and shy among us might be at least be a little uncomfortable knowing that at least one other person is going to know that sex is likely to be in their immediate future. So often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap. For comic effect, should the other items themselves be unfortunately or hastily chosen this may often lead to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick, which in turn will also provide the possibility for [[HilarityEnsues ensuring hilarity]] and comic misunderstandings.

to:

Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms. For one, given that even in these more sexually permissive days sex is nevertheless still seen as a rather private and intimate affair, the more modest and shy among us might be at least be a little uncomfortable knowing that at least one other person is going to know that sex is likely to be in their immediate future. So often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap. For comic effect, should the other items themselves be unfortunately or hastily chosen this may often lead to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick, which in turn will also provide the possibility for [[HilarityEnsues ensuring hilarity]] and comic misunderstandings.
3rd Jan '17 6:20:42 AM DoctorNemesis
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Note that, should you ever be so lucky in real life, buying contraceptives is almost never like that these days if for no other reason than the advent of HIV & AIDS created a very strong imperative to make barrier sexual protection as widely and easily available as possible. You buy them off the shelf, and the person at the counter won't even glance twice at your purchases. (Unless, of course, you're buying ''only'' [[NoodleImplements condoms, six feet of garden hose, Vaseline, maraschino cherries, and a rubber ducky.]]) Between this and changing views on sexuality, this trope has largely became a DiscreditedTrope. However, not that long ago, it was normal for condoms to be ''behind'' the counter, so you had to ''ask'' for 'em. This was something of a rite of passage, and sometimes is still considered this to a slight degree even today - the idea being that if you aren't mature enough to go and buy condoms by yourself, you aren't mature enough to be having sex either. Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms, so often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap (often leading to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick). In order to facilitate this trope (or at least its potential for [[HilarityEnsues hilarity ensuing]]) within these changing social mores, the trope may therefore be combined with ASimplePlan, in that what ''seems'' like the simple act of acquiring contraception will, through a collision of unrelated circumstances, become far more tortuous and complicated than it should be.

to:

Note that, should you ever be so lucky in real life, buying contraceptives is almost never like that these days if for no other reason than the advent of HIV & AIDS created a very strong imperative to make barrier sexual protection as widely and easily available as possible. You buy them off the shelf, and the person at the counter won't even glance twice at your purchases. (Unless, of course, you're buying ''only'' [[NoodleImplements condoms, six feet of garden hose, Vaseline, maraschino cherries, and a rubber ducky.]]) Between this and changing views on sexuality, this trope has largely became a DiscreditedTrope. However, not that long ago, it was normal for condoms to be ''behind'' the counter, so you had to ''ask'' for 'em. This was something of a rite of passage, and sometimes is still considered this to a slight degree even today - the idea being that if you aren't mature enough to go and buy condoms by yourself, you aren't mature enough to be having sex either. In order to facilitate this trope (or at least its potential for [[HilarityEnsues hilarity ensuing]]) within these changing social mores, the trope may therefore be combined with ASimplePlan, in that what ''seems'' like the simple act of acquiring contraception will, through a collision of unrelated circumstances, become far more tortuous and complicated than it should be.

Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms, so condoms. For one, given that even in these more sexually permissive days sex is nevertheless still seen as a rather private and intimate affair, the more modest and shy among us might be at least be a little uncomfortable knowing that at least one other person is going to know that sex is likely to be in their immediate future. So often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap (often leading soap. For comic effect, should the other items themselves be unfortunately or hastily chosen this may often lead to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick). In order to facilitate this trope (or at least its potential BreadEggsMilkSquick, which in turn will also provide the possibility for [[HilarityEnsues hilarity ensuing]]) within these changing social mores, the trope may therefore be combined with ASimplePlan, in that what ''seems'' like the simple act of acquiring contraception will, through a collision of unrelated circumstances, become far more tortuous ensuring hilarity]] and complicated than it should be.
comic misunderstandings.
3rd Jan '17 6:16:12 AM DoctorNemesis
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Note that, should you ever be so lucky in real life, buying contraceptives is almost never like that these days if for no other reason than the advent of HIV & AIDS created a very strong imperative to make barrier sexual protection as widely and easily available as possible. You buy them off the shelf, and the person at the counter won't even glance twice at your purchases. (Unless, of course, you're buying ''only'' [[NoodleImplements condoms, six feet of garden hose, Vaseline, maraschino cherries, and a rubber ducky.]]) Between this and changing views on sexuality, this trope has largely became a DiscreditedTrope. However, not that long ago, it was normal for condoms to be ''behind'' the counter, so you had to ''ask'' for 'em. This was something of a rite of passage, and sometimes is still considered this to a slight degree even today - the idea being that if you aren't mature enough to go and buy condoms by yourself, you aren't mature enough to be having sex either. Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms, so often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap (often leading to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick).

to:

Note that, should you ever be so lucky in real life, buying contraceptives is almost never like that these days if for no other reason than the advent of HIV & AIDS created a very strong imperative to make barrier sexual protection as widely and easily available as possible. You buy them off the shelf, and the person at the counter won't even glance twice at your purchases. (Unless, of course, you're buying ''only'' [[NoodleImplements condoms, six feet of garden hose, Vaseline, maraschino cherries, and a rubber ducky.]]) Between this and changing views on sexuality, this trope has largely became a DiscreditedTrope. However, not that long ago, it was normal for condoms to be ''behind'' the counter, so you had to ''ask'' for 'em. This was something of a rite of passage, and sometimes is still considered this to a slight degree even today - the idea being that if you aren't mature enough to go and buy condoms by yourself, you aren't mature enough to be having sex either. Nevertheless, many still see it as being a bit embarrassing--or at least a bit gauche--to buy condoms and nothing but condoms, so often the purchase will be mixed in with a number of other items, e.g. toothpaste or soap (often leading to a serious case of BreadEggsMilkSquick). In order to facilitate this trope (or at least its potential for [[HilarityEnsues hilarity ensuing]]) within these changing social mores, the trope may therefore be combined with ASimplePlan, in that what ''seems'' like the simple act of acquiring contraception will, through a collision of unrelated circumstances, become far more tortuous and complicated than it should be.
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