History Funny / TheWestWing

5th Mar '17 5:15:05 PM cerddom
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* The build-up for this joke [[BrickJoke has spanned over two seasons]]: The Chair of the Supreme Court is on the verge of full-blown dementia, writing statements in verse and such. He refuses to retire, because he's afraid that with a Republican Congress, Bartlet can't replace him with another left-leaning judge. The best the president can do is getting a centrist judge appointed. When in the episode ''The Supremes'' another, this time more conservative judge dies of a heart-attack, the White House is faced with a similar dilemma. Until Donna tells Josh about the two cats of her parents. Apparently, while her father preferred one cat, her mother had her heart set on another one. Therefore, they decided to compromise, and got both cats. Josh decided to do the same, by replacing the conservative judge with another conservative, and the Chair with a Democrat. When Donna finds out, she realizes what has happened:

to:

* The build-up for this joke [[BrickJoke has spanned over two seasons]]: The Chair of the Supreme Court Court's Chief Justice is on the verge of full-blown dementia, writing statements in verse and such. He refuses to retire, because he's afraid that with a Republican Congress, Bartlet can't replace him with another left-leaning judge. The best the president can do is getting a centrist judge appointed. When in the episode ''The Supremes'' another, this time more conservative judge dies of a heart-attack, the White House is faced with a similar dilemma. Until Donna tells Josh about the two cats of her parents. Apparently, while her father preferred one cat, her mother had her heart set on another one. Therefore, they decided to compromise, and got both cats. Josh decided to do the same, by replacing the conservative judge with another conservative, and the Chair Chief Justice with a Democrat. When Donna finds out, she realizes what has happened:
9th Feb '17 9:42:49 AM Gosicrystal
Is there an issue? Send a Message


-->'''Josh''': No, I did not. Let me be absolutely clear, I did not do that. [[NoExceptYes Except, yes, I did that]].

to:

-->'''Josh''': No, I did not. Let me be absolutely clear, I did not do that. [[NoExceptYes [[ByNoIMeanYes Except, yes, I did that]].
18th Jan '17 9:00:16 AM 06tele
Is there an issue? Send a Message


[''Leo looks at Bartlet on TV, basking in the attention of the press corps'']\\

to:

[''Leo looks at Bartlet on TV, basking in the attention of the press corps'']\\corps'']
18th Jan '17 8:58:06 AM 06tele
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* In the course of a conversation [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin about Swiss diplomacy]] in "Swiss Diplomacy," Bartlet is moved to draw an analogy to the cats his kids had when they were little, Mr. Finch and Mrs. Wilberforce. At the end of the scene, as they're walking away, he declares, "Mr. Finch and Mrs. Wilberforce! There's nothing wrong with my memory... though those are stupid names, and there's something wrong with my kids."

to:

* In the course cold open of a conversation [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin about Swiss diplomacy]] in "Swiss Diplomacy," Diplomacy", Bartlet is moved in a more than usually confident mood after being re-elected in spite of the revelations about his MS. C.J. is coaching him about the upcoming press conference:
-->'''C.J.''': Mr. President, how do you interpret the margin of victory?
-->'''Bartlet''': Well, the votes have been counted and the people have spoken, and it's clear that their will is for me
to draw an analogy be able to do and have anything I want.
-->'''C.J.''': Mr. President, Arnold White, Associated Press: What's the first legislative priority for your second term?
-->'''Bartlet''': There's a new guy from AP?
-->'''C.J.''': Yeah, what's your legislative priority?
-->'''Bartlet''': Well the President of Turkmenistan just officially extended the date of adolescence to twenty-five. So, things like that.
-->'''Leo''': [[TruthInTelevision I think he also renamed the month of January after himself.]]
-->'''Bartlet''': That's just greedy. Real power is knowing when to leave a little something on the table.
** Moments later, the Swiss ambassador has asked Leo to intercede for the son of the Ayatollah in Iran, who needs a heart/lung transplant. Leo promises to talk to "him".
--->'''Von Rutte''': The President?\\
[''Leo looks at Bartlet on TV, basking in the attention of the press corps'']\\
--->'''Bartlet''': [''on TV''] Don't get me wrong, Mark. I think January's a good month...
--->'''Leo''': Yeah, the President, Generalissimo, whatever he comes back as.
** Later still, as Leo and Bartlet go
to the Situation Room to discuss what to do about the boy:
--->'''Bartlet''': We had a couple of
cats his when the kids had when were kids named Mr. Finch and Ms. Wilberforce or something--I can't remember--but...
--->'''Leo''': You know, I've never really liked human names for animals.
--->'''Bartlet''': Really?
--->'''Leo''': Yeah.
--->'''Bartlet''': Okay, well, I can't believe my kids didn't think to ask you what to name the cats. But
they were little, Mr.used to bring mice into the house and show 'em to me.
--->'''Leo''': Yeah?
--->'''Bartlet''': This is how I'm starting to feel about the Swiss.
** At the end of the scene, as they're walking away, he declares, "Mr.
Finch and Mrs. Wilberforce. At the end of the scene, as they're walking away, he declares, "Mr. Finch and Mrs. Wilberforce! There's nothing wrong with my memory... though memory. Though those are stupid names, and there's something wrong with my kids."
18th Jan '17 8:42:01 AM 06tele
Is there an issue? Send a Message


--> "I've been thinking. It might not be such a bad idea to lock you all in here and set the place on fire. We have forty-eight hours before we kick off this campaign. We will all work hard, we will all work well, and we will all work together, or, so help me Mother of God, I will stick a pitchfork so far up your asses, you will quite simply be dead."

to:

--> "I've -->I've been thinking. It might not be such a bad idea to lock you all in here and set the place on fire. We have forty-eight hours before we kick off this campaign. We will all work hard, we will all work well, and we will all work together, or, so help me Mother of God, I will stick a pitchfork so far up your asses, you will quite simply be dead."



'''Margaret:''' Hey Josh.\\

to:

'''Margaret:''' [''deadpan''] Hey Josh.\\
31st Dec '16 6:54:11 AM awakeningcry
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

* Bruno (who else?!) has this absolute gem when his speech writing staff are clashing with the West Wing staff at Bartlett's farm in New Hampshire.
--> "I've been thinking. It might not be such a bad idea to lock you all in here and set the place on fire. We have forty-eight hours before we kick off this campaign. We will all work hard, we will all work well, and we will all work together, or, so help me Mother of God, I will stick a pitchfork so far up your asses, you will quite simply be dead."
16th Dec '16 1:31:00 AM 06tele
Is there an issue? Send a Message
16th Dec '16 1:28:42 AM 06tele
Is there an issue? Send a Message


-->'''Bruno''': [''smelling a rat; to Leo''] Are you playing with me? [''Leo smiles'']

to:

-->'''Bruno''': [''smelling a rat; rat for the first time; to Leo''] Leo''] ...Are you playing with me? me?\\
[''Leo smiles'']



-->'''Bruno''': Well, thank you, sir. I'll also need unfettered access to...
-->'''Bartlet''': No.
-->'''Bruno''': Sir, I...

to:

-->'''Bruno''': Well, thank you, sir. I'll also need unfettered access to...
to--
-->'''Bartlet''': [''immediately''] No.
-->'''Bruno''': Sir, I...I--



-->'''Bruno''': Respectfully, sir...

to:

-->'''Bruno''': Respectfully, sir...sir--



-->'''Bruno''': [''Beat''] Okay. Anyone else I have to field things through? I was sorry to hear about Dolores Landingham.

to:

-->'''Bruno''': [''Beat''] Okay. Anyone else I have to field things through? [''Bartlet smiles but doesn't reply.''] I was sorry to hear about Dolores Landingham.



-->'''Bruno''': Shut up.

to:

-->'''Bruno''': -->'''Bruno''': ...Shut up.up.
** Quoting it doesn't really do it justice; the performances sell it as well. At the beginning of his conversation with Leo, Ron Silver as Bruno is all impressive, quiet confidence because he is ''absolutely'' sure that he will get what he wants. By the time he returns to Leo's office he's a a defeated grump. John Spencer's and Martin Sheen's unflappable calm have a lot to do with it.
15th Dec '16 5:21:22 AM 06tele
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* Bruno Gianelli negotiating with Leo and then President Bartlet. He haggles with Leo and wins the compromise between 10 and 15 percent of the ad buy, getting 13 instead of 12. He then demands direct access to the President, which Leo denies, so Bruno threatens that if he talks to the President and says it's a dealbreaker, he'll say yes. Leo has Margaret show him into the Oval Office, where Bartlet immediately starts with "so we're giving you 12% of the ad buy?" and eventually cuts off Bruno's ultimatum with his own. Quoting it here wouldn't even do it justice since it's Ron Silver and Martin Sheen's dynamic that makes the negotiation hilariously one-sided.
** What makes it even more beautiful is that Bartlet is just so cheerfully pleasant and (seemingly) oblivious as he just completely demolishes all of Bruno's demands one after the other... because really, what's Bruno going to do?

to:

* Bruno Gianelli negotiating with Leo Leo, and then President Bartlet. He haggles with Leo and wins the compromise between 10 and It doesn't go as well as he'd hoped.
-->'''Leo''': What do you want?
-->'''Bruno''':
15 percent of the ad buy, getting 13 instead of 12. He then demands direct buys. You're gonna say, 10, so why don't we just say, 13?
-->'''Leo''': Why don't we say 12?
-->'''Bruno''': Why don't we say 13? I want hiring and firing prerogatives in my department and for starters, I'm bringing in Doug Wegland and Connie Tate.
-->'''Leo''': Fine.
-->'''Bruno''': A room at the Hay-Adams and a car and a driver.
-->'''Leo''': Fine.
-->'''Bruno''': And I want unfettered
access to the President.
-->'''Leo''': No.
-->'''Bruno''': I need it.
-->'''Leo''': Can't have it.
-->'''Bruno''': Leo, the only races I've ever lost are ones where the candidate didn't listen, or the advice didn't get through. That isn't gonna happen this time.
-->'''Leo''': Can't do it.
-->'''Bruno''': This is ego, and you know it as well as I do. I take this request
to the President, which Leo denies, so Bruno threatens that if he talks to the President and says tell him it's a dealbreaker, he'll deal breaker, he's going to say yes. Leo has Margaret show him yes.
-->'''Leo''': Knock yourself out. --Margaret!
-->'''Margaret''': [''comes in''] Yes, sir.
-->'''Leo''': Would you take Mr. Gianelli
into the Oval Office please?
-->'''Margaret''': Sure.
-->'''Bruno''': [''smelling a rat; to Leo''] Are you playing with me? [''Leo smiles'']
-->'''Margaret''': Mr. Gianelli, would you follow me, please?
-->'''Bruno''': Sure.\\
[''In
the Oval Office, where Bartlet immediately starts with "so we're giving you 12% of the ad buy?" and eventually cuts off Bruno's ultimatum with his own. Quoting it here wouldn't even do it justice since it's Ron Silver and Martin Sheen's dynamic that makes the negotiation hilariously one-sided.
** What makes it even more beautiful is that
Bartlet is just so cheerfully pleasant and (seemingly) oblivious as he just completely demolishes all of Bruno's demands one after the other... because really, what's reading. Bruno comes in.'']
-->'''Bartlet''': [''standing up; friendly''] Bruno!
-->'''Bruno''': Good morning, Mr. President. [''They shake hands''.]
-->'''Bartlet''': I understand you're
going to do?be working with us.
-->'''Bruno''': Well, sir, obviously I'm pleased to be approached. I believe there's a great deal I can do for you.
-->'''Bartlet''': You have one or two demands.
-->'''Bruno:''' Yes, sir. [''They sit in the opposing chairs''.]
-->'''Bartlet''': You want 12 percent of the ad buys.
-->'''Bruno''': [''Beat''] [[SureLetsGoWithThat Okay]]. Twelve, and...
-->'''Bartlet''': A room, a car, and a driver, that's no problem.
-->'''Bruno''': Well, thank you, sir. I'll also need unfettered access to...
-->'''Bartlet''': No.
-->'''Bruno''': Sir, I...
-->'''Bartlet''': [''pleasant but firm''] I'm sorry, Bruno. Leo runs the show.
-->'''Bruno''': Respectfully, sir...
-->'''Bartlet''': It's a deal breaker.
-->'''Bruno''': [''Beat''] Okay. Anyone else I have to field things through? I was sorry to hear about Dolores Landingham.
-->'''Bartlet''': Can you help us out?
-->'''Bruno''': Yes, sir.\\
[''They stand and shake hands again. After Bruno has returned to Leo's office:'']
-->'''Leo''': How'd it go?
-->'''Bruno''': Shut up.
15th Dec '16 5:03:28 AM 06tele
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

* Doug, the campaign strategist who doesn't understand Bartlet the way the staffers do.
-->'''Doug''': Listen, it's a simple equation. Bartlet rules America. America rocks, therefore, Bartlet rocks.
-->'''Sam''': America "rocks?"
-->'''Toby''': Bartlet... "rocks?"
-->'''Doug''': Yes.
-->'''Josh''': ...He really, doesn't. That much.
This list shows the last 10 events of 248. Show all.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.TheWestWing