History Funny / TheSimpsonsSeasons9To16

-->'''Fat Tony:''' ([[ManlyTears Crying]] while [[ManHug tearfully hugging a crying Legs]] [[CryIntoChest in comfort]]) I ain’t cried like this since I [[TakeThat paid to see]] [[ShoutOut “Godfather III.”]] (He and Legs tearfully glance as [[WhenSheSmiles an innocent smiling Maggie]], and then collapsed onto the floor, [[ManlyTears crying]] some more)

* Followed by this [[BlackComedy black comedy gem]] by Fat Tony as he, along with his gang, the Castellaneta Family, and President were [[EverybodyCries reduced to]] [[TearsOfRemorse tears]] [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone upon realizing from Moe about themselves almost getting Maggie killed]]

—>'''Fat Tony:''' ([[ManlyTears Crying]] while [[ManHug tearfully hugging a crying Legs]] [[CryIntoChest in comfort]]) I ain’t cried like this since I [[TakeThat paid to see]] [[ShoutOut “Godfather III.”]] (He and Legs tearfully glance as [[WhenSheSmiles an innocent smiling Maggie]], and then collapsed onto the floor, [[ManlyTears crying]] some more)

* Followed by this [[BlackComedy black comedy gem]] as Fat Tony, along with his gang, the Castellaneta Family, and President were [[EverybodyCries reduced to]] [[TearsOfRemorse tears]] [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone upon realizing from Moe about themselves almost getting Maggie killed]]

-->'''President:''' Now, hold on! I'm President of the Italian-American Anti-Defamation League.''(Angrily produces [[GunsAkimbo his two guns, akimbo style]], also revealing that [[Bait-And-Switch he, too, is unaware of Maggie being in the middle of this]])''...and this really burns my cannoli!

* In the middle of a Mexican standoff between two rival mob families:
-->'''Man:''' I'm the president of the Italian-American Anti-Defamation League...''(produces GunsAkimbo)''...and this really burns my cannoli.

-->"That's where you're wrong, buddy! It's not enough to ''want'' a cracker, you have to ''earn'' it!"

--->'''Homer:''' ''[[[{{Gasp}} GAAAAAAASP!]]]'' ''He's named like my name!''

-->'''Marge:''' It's hard to believe that someone that young could have risen to the rank of admiral.

'''Dr. Hibbert:''' [[KillItWithFire Fire, and lot's of it!]]\\

-->'''Principal Skinner:''' Who will eat the poisoned stew? It could be anyone... it could even be Mr. Burns!
-->'''Mr. Burns:''' This play ''really'' speaks to me!

-->'''Bart & Lisa:''' Silent night...
-->'''Homer:''' ''(screams and crashes)''
-->'''Bart & Lisa:''' HOLY NIGHT!!

-->'''Gary''': (''on the phone'') But the menu said "galaxy of prawns." Three prawns are hardly a galaxy. What do you mean your hands are tied? Let me talk to Mr. Quan.
-->'''Bart''': (''whispering'') I want to see how this turns out.
-->'''Lisa''': The phone's not even plugged in.
-->'''Gary''': All right. You listen to me, Quan. Hang on. I got another call. Yes, Mr. President. I can be in Washington right away.

-->'''Lisa''': You people took advantage of trusting school children.
-->'''Jim Hope''': How did you get past Gary Coleman?
-->'''Bart''': Let's just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy.

--> '''Lindsay Neagle''': I'm sorry, Gary, there's no longer a place for you here.\\
'''Gary Coleman''': [[Series/DiffrentStrokes Whatchu talkin' bout, Ms. Neagle?]]\\
'''Lindsay Neagle''': That is so adorable! You're rehired. ''(leaves)''\\

* Nelson showing his HiddenDepths to Ralph, Wendel, Louis, and Database.

-->'''Abe:''' My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, [[IResembleThatRemark a Communist]], [[ComicallyMissingThePoint but he is NOT a porn star]]!

* With Homer in charge: "Moe, steady as she goes." "Aye-aye, ya... big ''dummy''. Ugh, what a dummy."

'''Homer:''' Maybe you'd like me if you got to know me?

* Mrs. Krabappel's deadpan, "No. Stop. Think of the children" "plea" when Bart aims the tank cannon at the school. When he aims it at the sky (to shoot down the Major League Baseball satellite), Sideshow Mel screams "Not the sky! That's where clouds are born!"

--> '''Krusty''': Knock knock! Who's there? Juliet! Juliet who? Julie Ate so much Pasta Fasool, Romeo doesnt want her anymore!
--> *audience boos*
--> '''Krusty''': Tough crowd! They're booing Shakespeare!

* The entire "Battling Seizure Robots" sequence, though this came off as DudeNotFunny to some viewers, as it was parodying the "Electric Soldier Porygon" incident back when the ''Anime/{{Pokemon}}'' series was fresh and new and the subject of a lot of controversy.

* The revelation that Homer [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere deliberately pressed the self-destruct button so he wouldn't have to clean the garage]], but the jokes on him as the garage gets into heaven as well.

* Creator/DickClark melting from the [[MillenniumBug Y2K disaster]] ("Oh no, it's happening!") [[FunnyAneurysmMoment It's not as funny now, after his stroke in 2004 and even less after his death in 2012, but it was a very good "Dick Clark is perpetually young" joke while it lasted.]]

* Also, when Homer [[AFoolForAClient tries to defend himself in court...by referring to the jury as "drunken hicks,"]] followed by a SmashCut to everyone in the family working in a chain gang. Said jury features the reoccurring elderly dowager and a British military official.

'''Homer:''' ''(moans)'' I'm never eatin' chilli again... ''(he looks in the fridge)'' [[WhatAnIdiot Ooh, chilli!]]

* Also, when Homer [[AFoolForAClient tries to defend himself in court]]...[[WhatAnIdiot by referring to the jury as "drunken hicks,"]] followed by a SmashCut to everyone in the family working in a chain gang. Said jury features the reoccurring elderly dowager and a British military official.

'''Homer:''' Sure, sure.

** Before throwing him away, Homer states "As we say in my country, '[[Film/Terminator2 Hasta la vista, baby]]'". The European Spanish version of that sentence is... "Sayonara, baby".