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They were allowed to touch the melon but it wasn't allowed to touch the floor.
Changed line(s) 926 (click to see context) from:
*** Handling several pieces of destroyed watermelon (which they are also not allowed to do), Nick and Steve then just have to resort to hurling them into the living room and hoping they land on the table.
to:
*** Handling several pieces of destroyed watermelon (which they are also not allowed to do), Nick and Steve then just have to resort to hurling them into the living room and hoping they land on the table.table. Most of them slide off and touch the floor (which they weren't allowed to do).
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Spoilers Off on Moments Pages
Changed line(s) 350 (click to see context) from:
** The live task, to 'Pass the Pineapple', starts going off the rails in the second round, as the contestants realise they don't actually have to hold one pineapple each, [[spoiler:so Julian ends up hiding two pineapples]]. They go even further off the rails in the third round, as the contestants realise they don't have to hold on to the pineapples at all, so [[spoiler:Sue and Susan hide two pineapples off stage]], while Sam [[spoiler: hides behind Greg with a pineapple.]]
to:
** The live task, to 'Pass the Pineapple', starts going off the rails in the second round, as the contestants realise they don't actually have to hold one pineapple each, [[spoiler:so so Julian ends up hiding two pineapples]]. pineapples. They go even further off the rails in the third round, as the contestants realise they don't have to hold on to the pineapples at all, so [[spoiler:Sue Sue and Susan hide two pineapples off stage]], stage, while Sam [[spoiler: hides behind Greg with a pineapple.]]
Changed line(s) 353 (click to see context) from:
** Susan invokes her training at RADA[[note]]Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts[[/note]], while trying to fool Greg, so Greg starts calling her 'RADA' and becomes particularly determined to suss her out. [[spoiler:Susan fools him every time.]]
to:
** Susan invokes her training at RADA[[note]]Royal Academy of Dramatic Arts[[/note]], while trying to fool Greg, so Greg starts calling her 'RADA' and becomes particularly determined to suss her out. [[spoiler:Susan Susan fools him every time.]]
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Fixing indentation. Cleaned up a lot of single second or third-level bullets. As stated on the Example Indentation in Trope Lists page: "Bullet points are for examples, not comments about examples. For any indentation level other than single bullet, if there is only one item at the indentation level, it ain't indented right."
Changed line(s) 621,623 (click to see context) from:
* Greg tells Alex to introduce the prize task and Alex says 'You got it, poppet'. Greg voices his strong displeasure for being called 'poppet', then goes to Steve for the first entry:
-->'''Greg:''' How are you Steve?
-->'''Steve:''' I'm very well, thank you, poppet!
-->'''Greg:''' How are you Steve?
-->'''Steve:''' I'm very well, thank you, poppet!
to:
* During the prize round:
** Greg tells Alex to introduce the prize task and Alex says 'You got it, poppet'. Greg voices his strong displeasure for being called 'poppet', then goes to Steve for the first entry:
-->'''Greg:''' --->'''Greg:''' How are you Steve?
-->'''Steve:''' --->'''Steve:''' I'm very well, thank you, poppet!
** Greg tells Alex to introduce the prize task and Alex says 'You got it, poppet'. Greg voices his strong displeasure for being called 'poppet', then goes to Steve for the first entry:
Changed line(s) 648 (click to see context) from:
*** And yet it still turns out not perfect for John, as Alex points out he actually wasted a lot of time before working out the grabber trick and ended up taking longer than Steve, scoring just four points.
to:
Changed line(s) 662 (click to see context) from:
* Everyone's disembodied heads in the live task.
to:
* Everyone's From the live task:
** The image of everyone's disembodied headsin when they take position behind the live task.board.
** The image of everyone's disembodied heads
Changed line(s) 695 (click to see context) from:
*** Even better is when Sophie thinks Greg doesn't find it tense simply because he's tall, so she gives a live demonstration where Greg is sitting down beneath her chair. Greg still has the same response.
to:
Changed line(s) 700,703 (click to see context) from:
** The five points deservingly go to Joanne, though, who immediately takes the 'sexual tension' route, sitting on Alex's lap and caressing his face.
*** While she's doing this, she makes this hilariously disconcerting remark:
---->'''Joanne:''' Ohhh... it's like my father's alive again. It's his anniversary today, been dead 21 years. ...You smell like him.
*** The moment Alex blows his whistle, Joanne gets off Alex and beelines the door, saying 'Never look at me again.'
*** While she's doing this, she makes this hilariously disconcerting remark:
---->'''Joanne:''' Ohhh... it's like my father's alive again. It's his anniversary today, been dead 21 years. ...You smell like him.
*** The moment Alex blows his whistle, Joanne gets off Alex and beelines the door, saying 'Never look at me again.'
to:
** The five points deservingly go to Joanne, though, who immediately takes the 'sexual tension' route, sitting on Alex's lap and caressing his face. \n*** While she's doing this, she makes this hilariously disconcerting remark:
---->'''Joanne:''' --->'''Joanne:''' Ohhh... it's like my father's alive again. It's his anniversary today, been dead 21 years. ...You smell like him.
*** ** The moment Alex blows his whistle, Joanne gets off Alex and beelines the door, saying 'Never look at me again.'
Changed line(s) 720 (click to see context) from:
*** Even better, her guess of 'herpes' still allows her to solve the acrostic part of the task as it begins with the same letter H as 'hand'.
to:
Changed line(s) 732 (click to see context) from:
*** This is funny enough on its own, but what makes it particularly amusing is Greg seemingly not noticing Steve's [[CallBack Call-Back]] and just moving straight on with the show... while Alex very clearly has noticed, and makes a truly remarkable WTF face.
to:
Changed line(s) 744 (click to see context) from:
*** Joanne does little to dispel Greg's Fallopian guess when she describes the skin under the moustache as 'the labial folds'. She's absolutely right, but it doesn't stop her drawing from being interpreted as a 'vaginal moustache'.
to:
Changed line(s) 755 (click to see context) from:
** Joanne's absurd entry.
to:
** Joanne's absurd entry. entry:
Changed line(s) 789,792 (click to see context) from:
*** In the studio, Nick is at a total loss to explain why he flipped at all.
* The little versions of the contestants used for the parking live task. Even better when Alex reveals that when they are eliminated the little contestants have to be taken away to sit on the elimination bench, and Sophie refuses to give hers up.
-->'''Alex:''' I must take Small Sophie away from you.
-->'''Sophie:''' No you can't!
* The little versions of the contestants used for the parking live task. Even better when Alex reveals that when they are eliminated the little contestants have to be taken away to sit on the elimination bench, and Sophie refuses to give hers up.
-->'''Alex:''' I must take Small Sophie away from you.
-->'''Sophie:''' No you can't!
to:
* From the live task to park the vehicles:
** The little versions of the contestants
Changed line(s) 805 (click to see context) from:
*** John's memes include a picture of Alex with the hashtag [=#IGot99ProblemsAndAlexHorneIsAllOfThem=].
to:
Changed line(s) 823 (click to see context) from:
*** Discussing this in the studio, Greg asks John which Queen album a particular song comes from, and John initially gets it wrong. Greg jokes that John's going to be kicked out of the Queen fan club for that, and John reveals he actually is a member of the Queen fan club.
to:
Changed line(s) 839,840 (click to see context) from:
** After the task is complete, Nick begins shuffling back to the stage while still covered up by the rings.
to:
Changed line(s) 854,855 (click to see context) from:
*** This then leads to this discussion:
---->'''Alex:''' We were looking for one person to be brave enough to just go 'fish' immediately.\\
---->'''Alex:''' We were looking for one person to be brave enough to just go 'fish' immediately.\\
to:
Changed line(s) 866,867 (click to see context) from:
*** It then gets worse in her actual performance as Joanne also heavily incorporates charades into her piece.
---->'''Joanne:''' Charades! Cause it's Christmas![[note]]Neither the filming date nor the airing date was anywhere near Christmas.[[/note]]\\
---->'''Joanne:''' Charades! Cause it's Christmas![[note]]Neither the filming date nor the airing date was anywhere near Christmas.[[/note]]\\
to:
Changed line(s) 869,871 (click to see context) from:
*** It gets worse - Joanne charades that the first syllable of her piece is 'beer', only for the actual answer to turn out to be 'Bolero'.
*** And yet somehow, despite all this, Joanne ends up getting three points, scoring higher than both Steve and Sophie, because Greg was actually able to guess that it was Bolero. Also because Sophie completely misheard Greg's question:
---->'''Greg:''' Is Joanne's better than Sophie's?\\
*** And yet somehow, despite all this, Joanne ends up getting three points, scoring higher than both Steve and Sophie, because Greg was actually able to guess that it was Bolero. Also because Sophie completely misheard Greg's question:
---->'''Greg:''' Is Joanne's better than Sophie's?\\
to:
Changed line(s) 878,880 (click to see context) from:
** The visual image of Steve squeezing oranges in his armpit.
*** Steve's armpit strategy ends up getting a lot of juice into his shirt, so he squeezes out the shirt to get more juice into the vase.
---->'''Steve:''' Am I allowed to do that?\\
*** Steve's armpit strategy ends up getting a lot of juice into his shirt, so he squeezes out the shirt to get more juice into the vase.
---->'''Steve:''' Am I allowed to do that?\\
to:
** The visual image of Steve squeezing oranges in his armpit.
***armpit. Steve's armpit strategy ends up getting a lot of juice into his shirt, so he squeezes out the shirt to get more juice into the vase.
---->'''Steve:''' --->'''Steve:''' Am I allowed to do that?\\
***
Changed line(s) 882,884 (click to see context) from:
** John squeezing his orange juice with his forearms, which he decides is quite erotic, calling it 'like a scene from a very sexual film'. The camera then closes in on the beads of juice sliding down his arms with sexy music playing in the background.
*** Greg isn't impressed by this:
---->'''Greg:''' That was the least sexy thing I've ever seen in my life.\\
*** Greg isn't impressed by this:
---->'''Greg:''' That was the least sexy thing I've ever seen in my life.\\
to:
** John squeezing his orange juice with his forearms, which he decides is quite erotic, calling it 'like a scene from a very sexual film'. The camera then closes in on the beads of juice sliding down his arms with sexy music playing in the background.
***background. Greg isn't impressed by this:
---->'''Greg:''' --->'''Greg:''' That was the least sexy thing I've ever seen in my life.\\
***
Changed line(s) 890,892 (click to see context) from:
*** Alex is more interested in the logistics of redeeming the voucher:
---->'''Alex:''' Will you go to them or will they go to you?
---->'''Nick:''' Good question, actually; we should just meet somewhere central.
---->'''Alex:''' Will you go to them or will they go to you?
---->'''Nick:''' Good question, actually; we should just meet somewhere central.
to:
Changed line(s) 900,901 (click to see context) from:
** Even better, the task says you have 'flifteen' minutes, and Alex makes every contestant go back and say 'flifteen' after they mistakenly say 'fifteen'. Sophie in particular takes an amusingly long time to notice it.
*** Steve, on the other hand, clearly shows himself to be on the same wavelength of humour as Alex, as he is not only the only contestant to read 'flifteen' immediately, but also adds to the joke:
*** Steve, on the other hand, clearly shows himself to be on the same wavelength of humour as Alex, as he is not only the only contestant to read 'flifteen' immediately, but also adds to the joke:
to:
** Even better, the task says you have 'flifteen' minutes, and Alex makes every contestant go back and say 'flifteen' after they mistakenly say 'fifteen'. Sophie in particular takes an amusingly long time to notice it.
***it. Steve, on the other hand, clearly shows himself to be on the same wavelength of humour as Alex, as he is not only the only contestant to read 'flifteen' immediately, but also adds to the joke:
***
Changed line(s) 910 (click to see context) from:
*** It turns out Nick thought the task was to get the items furthest from ''Alex''. What makes it better though is the fact Nick was completely confident he'd absolutely smashed the task, even after rereading it - when his VT was left until last, John apparently asked Nick if he'd done something extraordinary, and Nick said 'yeah'!
to:
Changed line(s) 931 (click to see context) from:
*** Sophie defends Wolfie:
to:
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*** After Alex blows his whistle, they ask if they can go in and check the task now. He, pityingly, says that they really shouldn't.
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Changed line(s) 25 (click to see context) from:
** Lucy's absolute disaster of an effort; she took a full minute to find the door of the living room in order to leave it, then repeatedly knocked over her tower of cans, and ended up embarrassedly crawling away in silence. Guaranteed one point, right?...
to:
** Lucy's absolute disaster of an effort; she took a full minute to find the door of the living room in order to leave it, then repeatedly knocked over her tower of cans, and ended up embarrassedly crawling away in silence. Guaranteed one point, right?...
Changed line(s) 33 (click to see context) from:
** Amazingly, Sue does even ''worse''. After dramatically sneaking through the corridor ninja-style as if she were a superspy infiltrating a top-secret supervillain lair, she ends up completely collapsing the tower of cans immediately after making contact with it.
to:
** Amazingly, So Lucy's guaranteed one point, right? Nope - amazingly, Sue does even ''worse''. After dramatically sneaking through the corridor ninja-style as if she were a superspy infiltrating a top-secret supervillain lair, she ends up completely collapsing the tower of cans immediately after making contact with it.
Changed line(s) 914 (click to see context) from:
*** Sophie doesn't even try to worm the word 'umbrella' carefully into conversation, at first just murmuring 'umbrella' under her breath, before escalating to simply saying 'I feel like an umbrella' for no reason, and then just openly yelling 'umbrella!' in the living room. Two things make this even funnier - number one, that she ended up saying it ''15'' times, ten times more than necessary; and number two, than she still gets her two bonus points because despite her flagrant unsubtlety, neither John nor Joanne question it once!
to:
*** Sophie doesn't even try to worm the word 'umbrella' carefully into conversation, at first just murmuring 'umbrella' under her breath, before escalating to simply saying 'I feel like an umbrella' for no reason, and then just openly yelling 'umbrella!' in the living room. Two things make this even funnier - number one, that she ended up saying it ''15'' times, ten times more than necessary; and number two, than that she still gets her two bonus points because despite her flagrant unsubtlety, neither John nor Joanne question it once!
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Resolving a comma splice.
Changed line(s) 892 (click to see context) from:
---->'''Nick:''' Good question actually, we should just meet somewhere central.
to:
---->'''Nick:''' Good question actually, question, actually; we should just meet somewhere central.
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Changed line(s) 918,919 (click to see context) from:
** Meanwhile, both Steve
to:
** Meanwhile, both Steve
Steve and Joanne are tasked with lying on the ground for 30 seconds without their teammates questioning it - and both achieve it easily, despite neither managing to make it make sense.
** John putting the task in his back pocket and then being unable to find it.
** And besides all of this, we then have even further hilarity in this task thanks to Steve and Nick's disastrous attempt, which Greg calls the worst attempt at a task in 17 series. They somehow manage to violate almost every single rule and make mistake after mistake after mistake. Some highlights:
*** After leaving the living room, the contestants are not allowed to re-enter, but both Steve and Nick leave immediately - and manage to leave the task in there, meaning they can't refer back to it (which seems to have been the cause of their other mistakes).
*** This moment sets the tone for what is to come:
---->'''Steve:''' We may not step on the stage...
---->''(Nick immediately steps on the stage)''
*** Steve uses a brick to knock the watermelon off its perch on the stage... thus causing the watermelon to hit the stage, which it isn't allowed to do.
*** Steve then tries to raise the watermelon back up with a pole, only for the watermelon to split and fall off the top, going splat on the stage below.
*** Handling several pieces of destroyed watermelon (which they are also not allowed to do), Nick and Steve then just have to resort to hurling them into the living room and hoping they land on the table.
* The task to make a mannequin come to life:
** John does a dramatic and sinister ballroom dance with his mannequin. What makes it funny, though, is the fact it is totally juxtaposed in the same VT with Sophie's creation, a dog-woman called 'Wolfie', who's 36, a Scorpio, and looking for love, and who eventually starts beatboxing.
*** Sophie defends Wolfie:
--->'''Sophie:''' What's more alive than a beatboxing wolf?
--->'''Greg:''' An ashtray?
** Joanne's video begins with the caravan shaking and someone bouncing on the bed within. A repeat of Sally Phillips having sex with a water cooler back in S5? No - Joanne is simply trying to resuscitate her mannequin, a one-eyed man named Darren. However, as Greg notes, in the video's story, Joanne actually fails to resuscitate Darren, and thus doesn't fulfill the task brief.
--->'''Greg:''' You were in control of the narrative, and you chose not to save him!
** Nick as a magician named 'Daniel Paul', particularly when Nick tilts him forward to simulate a bow.
** Steve naturally offers the creepiest entry, dressing himself up as the mannequin, giggling in a high-pitched and sinister voice, asking Alex to dance with him, and then kissing him.
--->'''Steve:''' My name is Quinn. Manny Quinn.
* At the end of the episode, Alex reveals the series scores are quite close - last place Nick is 'only 47' points away from first-place John.
-->'''Greg:''' You have got a chance of winning the series still, Nick... if three people die.
-->'''Nick:''' I can do that!
** John putting the task in his back pocket and then being unable to find it.
** And besides all of this, we then have even further hilarity in this task thanks to Steve and Nick's disastrous attempt, which Greg calls the worst attempt at a task in 17 series. They somehow manage to violate almost every single rule and make mistake after mistake after mistake. Some highlights:
*** After leaving the living room, the contestants are not allowed to re-enter, but both Steve and Nick leave immediately - and manage to leave the task in there, meaning they can't refer back to it (which seems to have been the cause of their other mistakes).
*** This moment sets the tone for what is to come:
---->'''Steve:''' We may not step on the stage...
---->''(Nick immediately steps on the stage)''
*** Steve uses a brick to knock the watermelon off its perch on the stage... thus causing the watermelon to hit the stage, which it isn't allowed to do.
*** Steve then tries to raise the watermelon back up with a pole, only for the watermelon to split and fall off the top, going splat on the stage below.
*** Handling several pieces of destroyed watermelon (which they are also not allowed to do), Nick and Steve then just have to resort to hurling them into the living room and hoping they land on the table.
* The task to make a mannequin come to life:
** John does a dramatic and sinister ballroom dance with his mannequin. What makes it funny, though, is the fact it is totally juxtaposed in the same VT with Sophie's creation, a dog-woman called 'Wolfie', who's 36, a Scorpio, and looking for love, and who eventually starts beatboxing.
*** Sophie defends Wolfie:
--->'''Sophie:''' What's more alive than a beatboxing wolf?
--->'''Greg:''' An ashtray?
** Joanne's video begins with the caravan shaking and someone bouncing on the bed within. A repeat of Sally Phillips having sex with a water cooler back in S5? No - Joanne is simply trying to resuscitate her mannequin, a one-eyed man named Darren. However, as Greg notes, in the video's story, Joanne actually fails to resuscitate Darren, and thus doesn't fulfill the task brief.
--->'''Greg:''' You were in control of the narrative, and you chose not to save him!
** Nick as a magician named 'Daniel Paul', particularly when Nick tilts him forward to simulate a bow.
** Steve naturally offers the creepiest entry, dressing himself up as the mannequin, giggling in a high-pitched and sinister voice, asking Alex to dance with him, and then kissing him.
--->'''Steve:''' My name is Quinn. Manny Quinn.
* At the end of the episode, Alex reveals the series scores are quite close - last place Nick is 'only 47' points away from first-place John.
-->'''Greg:''' You have got a chance of winning the series still, Nick... if three people die.
-->'''Nick:''' I can do that!
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[[AC:The Umbrella Wink]]
* Prize task this episode is 'the thing Greg would most like to squeeze in his mighty hands'.
** Nick brings a voucher for one squeeze of his thigh. When Greg squeezes it, they turn out to be so firm and muscular he actually recoils in surprise, and describes them as 'mighty tree trunks'.
*** Alex is more interested in the logistics of redeeming the voucher:
---->'''Alex:''' Will you go to them or will they go to you?
---->'''Nick:''' Good question actually, we should just meet somewhere central.
** Steve's banana-filling machine, which he demonstrates so enthusiastically that Greg asks him if he's got shares in the company. Alex shares a review of the machine: 'Inexpensive enough to enjoy the memories made'.
** Joanne's nose, which has no cartilage so it squishes right down. Greg is equal parts fascinated and horrified by this. And then there's this bit:
--->'''Joanne:''' And I'm adopted, so when I was younger...
--->'''Greg:''' You went round pressing people's noses?
--->'''Joanne:''' ''(miming pressing noses)'' Are you my mum? Are you my mum? Are you my mum?
** Amidst all these great entries, John for some reason decides to bring his childhood farthing collection.
* The tongue-twister of the first task, which clearly pleases Alex way too much: 'Flick, flip, and flap this flip-flop, flan, and flapjack'.
** Even better, the task says you have 'flifteen' minutes, and Alex makes every contestant go back and say 'flifteen' after they mistakenly say 'fifteen'. Sophie in particular takes an amusingly long time to notice it.
*** Steve, on the other hand, clearly shows himself to be on the same wavelength of humour as Alex, as he is not only the only contestant to read 'flifteen' immediately, but also adds to the joke:
--->'''Steve:''' How much of the flifteen minutes have gone?
--->'''Alex:''' Six.
--->'''Steve:''' Six. When I get to flive, let me know.
** John getting Alex to gaffer tape huge paddles to his arms so he looks like a bird, and especially Alex's expression of horrified excitement when John tells him to tape the paddles onto his skin.
** Joanne flipping her flan into the Greg statue's face.
** Steve jumping on a seesaw to launch his flan into the air, where it rains down over the garden.
** Sophie misunderstands the task somewhat and thinks she can only do her attempts from the table where the objects are located, so she ends up barely flicking, flipping, and flapping her objects a far distance at all (the flip-flop doesn't even leave the table).
** Her misunderstanding, however, pales in comparison to Nick's total misunderstanding. After reading the task, Nick unexpectedly picks up the whole table with all the objects on it, carries it rather seriously and ceremonially to the end of the garden, and then just flips it over. The image of him flipping the table might be one of the funniest visuals of the whole series.
*** It turns out Nick thought the task was to get the items furthest from ''Alex''. What makes it better though is the fact Nick was completely confident he'd absolutely smashed the task, even after rereading it - when his VT was left until last, John apparently asked Nick if he'd done something extraordinary, and Nick said 'yeah'!
* The contestants receive a secret task before their next team task. Alex tries to give it to them quietly and subtly, only for Joanne to begin reading her secret task in the loudest voice possible.
-->'''Greg:''' Joanne literally talks at the same volume you would use to warn ships away from rocks.
** Sophie and Nick both have to say 'umbrella' five times without their teammates questioning it, and both do it hilariously:
*** Sophie doesn't even try to worm the word 'umbrella' carefully into conversation, at first just murmuring 'umbrella' under her breath, before escalating to simply saying 'I feel like an umbrella' for no reason, and then just openly yelling 'umbrella!' in the living room. Two things make this even funnier - number one, that she ended up saying it ''15'' times, ten times more than necessary; and number two, than she still gets her two bonus points because despite her flagrant unsubtlety, neither John nor Joanne question it once!
---->'''John:''' Are you allowed to touch the watermelon?
---->'''Sophie:'''' I am, umbrella, I am.
*** Nick at least tries to say his umbrellas more subtly, and at least brings an umbrella into the task that he can refer to. However, whenever he says it he then turns and gives the camera a cheeky wink, leading to the episode's title.
** Meanwhile, both Steve
* Prize task this episode is 'the thing Greg would most like to squeeze in his mighty hands'.
** Nick brings a voucher for one squeeze of his thigh. When Greg squeezes it, they turn out to be so firm and muscular he actually recoils in surprise, and describes them as 'mighty tree trunks'.
*** Alex is more interested in the logistics of redeeming the voucher:
---->'''Alex:''' Will you go to them or will they go to you?
---->'''Nick:''' Good question actually, we should just meet somewhere central.
** Steve's banana-filling machine, which he demonstrates so enthusiastically that Greg asks him if he's got shares in the company. Alex shares a review of the machine: 'Inexpensive enough to enjoy the memories made'.
** Joanne's nose, which has no cartilage so it squishes right down. Greg is equal parts fascinated and horrified by this. And then there's this bit:
--->'''Joanne:''' And I'm adopted, so when I was younger...
--->'''Greg:''' You went round pressing people's noses?
--->'''Joanne:''' ''(miming pressing noses)'' Are you my mum? Are you my mum? Are you my mum?
** Amidst all these great entries, John for some reason decides to bring his childhood farthing collection.
* The tongue-twister of the first task, which clearly pleases Alex way too much: 'Flick, flip, and flap this flip-flop, flan, and flapjack'.
** Even better, the task says you have 'flifteen' minutes, and Alex makes every contestant go back and say 'flifteen' after they mistakenly say 'fifteen'. Sophie in particular takes an amusingly long time to notice it.
*** Steve, on the other hand, clearly shows himself to be on the same wavelength of humour as Alex, as he is not only the only contestant to read 'flifteen' immediately, but also adds to the joke:
--->'''Steve:''' How much of the flifteen minutes have gone?
--->'''Alex:''' Six.
--->'''Steve:''' Six. When I get to flive, let me know.
** John getting Alex to gaffer tape huge paddles to his arms so he looks like a bird, and especially Alex's expression of horrified excitement when John tells him to tape the paddles onto his skin.
** Joanne flipping her flan into the Greg statue's face.
** Steve jumping on a seesaw to launch his flan into the air, where it rains down over the garden.
** Sophie misunderstands the task somewhat and thinks she can only do her attempts from the table where the objects are located, so she ends up barely flicking, flipping, and flapping her objects a far distance at all (the flip-flop doesn't even leave the table).
** Her misunderstanding, however, pales in comparison to Nick's total misunderstanding. After reading the task, Nick unexpectedly picks up the whole table with all the objects on it, carries it rather seriously and ceremonially to the end of the garden, and then just flips it over. The image of him flipping the table might be one of the funniest visuals of the whole series.
*** It turns out Nick thought the task was to get the items furthest from ''Alex''. What makes it better though is the fact Nick was completely confident he'd absolutely smashed the task, even after rereading it - when his VT was left until last, John apparently asked Nick if he'd done something extraordinary, and Nick said 'yeah'!
* The contestants receive a secret task before their next team task. Alex tries to give it to them quietly and subtly, only for Joanne to begin reading her secret task in the loudest voice possible.
-->'''Greg:''' Joanne literally talks at the same volume you would use to warn ships away from rocks.
** Sophie and Nick both have to say 'umbrella' five times without their teammates questioning it, and both do it hilariously:
*** Sophie doesn't even try to worm the word 'umbrella' carefully into conversation, at first just murmuring 'umbrella' under her breath, before escalating to simply saying 'I feel like an umbrella' for no reason, and then just openly yelling 'umbrella!' in the living room. Two things make this even funnier - number one, that she ended up saying it ''15'' times, ten times more than necessary; and number two, than she still gets her two bonus points because despite her flagrant unsubtlety, neither John nor Joanne question it once!
---->'''John:''' Are you allowed to touch the watermelon?
---->'''Sophie:'''' I am, umbrella, I am.
*** Nick at least tries to say his umbrellas more subtly, and at least brings an umbrella into the task that he can refer to. However, whenever he says it he then turns and gives the camera a cheeky wink, leading to the episode's title.
** Meanwhile, both Steve
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Changed line(s) 583 (click to see context) from:
-->''(laughter and applause for Alex's joke)''
to:
-->''(laughter and applause for Alex's joke)''joke; Greg reacts as he belatedly realises that he walked right into it)''
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Changed line(s) 855,859 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Alex:''' We were looking for one person to be brave enough to just go 'fish' immediately.
--->'''John:''' But why would you do that?
--->'''Alex:''' Well everything was a red herring as well which led you to fish, you were wearing fishing clothes and holding a fishing rod.
--->'''John:''' That's because we were fishing for something.
--->'''Alex:''' It was a fish.
--->'''John:''' But why would you do that?
--->'''Alex:''' Well everything was a red herring as well which led you to fish, you were wearing fishing clothes and holding a fishing rod.
--->'''John:''' That's because we were fishing for something.
--->'''Alex:''' It was a fish.
to:
--->'''John:'''
'''John:''' But why would you do
--->'''Alex:'''
'''Alex:''' Well everything was a red herring as well which led you to fish, you were wearing fishing clothes and holding a fishing
--->'''John:'''
'''John:''' That's because we were fishing for
--->'''Alex:'''
'''Alex:''' It was a fish.
Changed line(s) 867,868 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Joanne:''' Charades! Cause it's Christmas![[note]]Neither the filming date nor the airing date was anywhere near Christmas.[[/note]]
--->'''Greg:''' ''(sarcastically)'' Oh, five points then.
--->'''Greg:''' ''(sarcastically)'' Oh, five points then.
to:
--->'''Greg:'''
'''Greg:''' ''(sarcastically)'' Oh, five points then.
Changed line(s) 871,873 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Greg:''' Is Joanne's better than Sophie's?
--->'''Sophie:''' Yes. ''(realizing what she just said)'' ...No.
--->''(everybody proceeds to break)''
--->'''Sophie:''' Yes. ''(realizing what she just said)'' ...No.
--->''(everybody proceeds to break)''
to:
--->'''Sophie:'''
'''Sophie:''' Yes. ''(realizing what she just said)'' ...
--->''(everybody
''(everybody proceeds to break)''
Changed line(s) 880,881 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Steve:''' Am I allowed to do that?
--->'''Alex:''' You are allowed to do it, but it looks like you're milking yourself.
--->'''Alex:''' You are allowed to do it, but it looks like you're milking yourself.
to:
--->'''Alex:'''
'''Alex:''' You are allowed to do it, but it looks like you're milking yourself.
Changed line(s) 884,886 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Greg:''' That was the least sexy thing I've ever seen in my life.
--->'''John:''' It was as sexual as orange juice can be.
--->'''John:''' It was as sexual as orange juice can be.
to:
--->'''John:'''
'''John:''' It was as sexual as orange juice can be.
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Changed line(s) 870 (click to see context) from:
*** And yet somehow, despite all this, Joanne ends up getting three points, scoring higher than both Steve and Sophie, because Greg was actually able to guess that it was Bolero.
to:
*** And yet somehow, despite all this, Joanne ends up getting three points, scoring higher than both Steve and Sophie, because Greg was actually able to guess that it was Bolero. Also because Sophie completely misheard Greg's question:
Changed line(s) 872 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Sophie:''' Yes. ...No.
to:
--->'''Sophie:''' Yes. ...No. ''(realizing what she just said)'' ...No.
--->''(everybody proceeds to break)''
--->''(everybody proceeds to break)''
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Changed line(s) 867 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Joanne:''' Charades! Cause it's Christmas![[note]]Neither the filming date nor the airing date was anywhere near Christmas.[[note/]]
to:
--->'''Joanne:''' Charades! Cause it's Christmas![[note]]Neither the filming date nor the airing date was anywhere near Christmas.[[note/]][[/note]]
Changed line(s) 871,872 (click to see context) from:
--->
to:
--->'''Sophie:''' Yes. ...No.
* Tasked to 'confess their favourite kitchen implement to Alex', both John and Steve interpret this to mean like a Catholic confession.
-->'''Steve:''' Forgive me, father... my favourite kitchen implement is a cheese grater.
** In this task, contestants have to name a kitchen implement, garden tool, and body part. They then have to juice oranges while only touching them with these three things.
** Some of the contestants choose particularly impractical body parts, including Nick choosing 'little toe', Joanne choosing 'ear', and Sophie emphatically choosing 'boob'.
** The visual image of Steve squeezing oranges in his armpit.
*** Steve's armpit strategy ends up getting a lot of juice into his shirt, so he squeezes out the shirt to get more juice into the vase.
--->'''Steve:''' Am I allowed to do that?
--->'''Alex:''' You are allowed to do it, but it looks like you're milking yourself.
** John squeezing his orange juice with his forearms, which he decides is quite erotic, calling it 'like a scene from a very sexual film'. The camera then closes in on the beads of juice sliding down his arms with sexy music playing in the background.
*** Greg isn't impressed by this:
--->'''Greg:''' That was the least sexy thing I've ever seen in my life.
--->'''John:''' It was as sexual as orange juice can be.
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[[AC:Dream Date Territory]]
* The prize task is snazziest hollow thing.
** Joanne brings a sparkly boot, which she has filled up with chips. Greg argues that the sparkly boot was snazzy and hollow enough on its own, and Joanne has clearly just added the chips because he's fat.
** John brings a Fabergé egg, which Greg deems 'horrible'. John's gloriously melodramatic sad frown when Greg says this is hilarious.
** Nick brings the soundtrack to Sleepy Hollow, which the show isn't allowed to play for music copyright reasons, so he just goes over to Greg and whispers it in his ear.
** Steve tricking Greg into making a 'hollow promise' to attend a man's stag do dressed as a Minotaur.
* All the contestants have a disdain for the first task, following a long string to eventually find a fish, which they all find slow, difficult, and boring... except for Nick, who scurries through the task extremely quickly and clearly enjoys himself throughout.
** Nick's scurrying gets him repeatedly compared to a little mouse throughout the rest of the episode.
** Sophie finds a mannequin in the garden hutch, and tests Alex to work out if it's what she's looking for:
--->'''Sophie:''' Look into my eyes, is it the mannequin? ''(she stares at Alex for a couple of seconds)'' It's not!
--->''(Alex looks confusedly at the camera)''
** Part of the task involves faking a mic error so the sound guy can attach a paper saying 'fish' to the contestants' backs. John is not happy about this:
--->'''John:''' It's not fair to assume that I should have thought the sound guy was a ''LIAR!''
*** This then leads to this discussion:
--->'''Alex:''' We were looking for one person to be brave enough to just go 'fish' immediately.
--->'''John:''' But why would you do that?
--->'''Alex:''' Well everything was a red herring as well which led you to fish, you were wearing fishing clothes and holding a fishing rod.
--->'''John:''' That's because we were fishing for something.
--->'''Alex:''' It was a fish.
* The contestants have to perform a piece of classical music without instruments.
** Sophie stomping about while drumming on glassware and the table (and accidentally smashing a glass in the process).
** Steve performs his piece while holding three bottles of water. When he bows at the end of his performance, all the water spills out of the bottles, and Steve looks genuinely annoyed with himself.
** Steve's performance is initially claimed as Beethoven's Symphony No.9, and sounds only barely like it. In the studio, he claims his actual piece was Greensleeves, so they play it again... and it sounds even less like that. Greg tells Steve he should have stuck with Beethoven.
** The highlight of this task is unquestionably Joanne, however, who forewent using any objects at all, and instead for some reason tried to communicate her piece through 'interpretive dance'. The prep video cutting from Nick carefully assembling bottles to Joanne just randomly clomping about the room is particularly funny.
--->'''Alex:''' It never occurred to her to make any noise at all.
*** It then gets worse in her actual performance as Joanne also heavily incorporates charades into her piece.
--->'''Joanne:''' Charades! Cause it's Christmas![[note]]Neither the filming date nor the airing date was anywhere near Christmas.[[note/]]
--->'''Greg:''' ''(sarcastically)'' Oh, five points then.
*** It gets worse - Joanne charades that the first syllable of her piece is 'beer', only for the actual answer to turn out to be 'Bolero'.
*** And yet somehow, despite all this, Joanne ends up getting three points, scoring higher than both Steve and Sophie, because Greg was actually able to guess that it was Bolero.
--->
* The prize task is snazziest hollow thing.
** Joanne brings a sparkly boot, which she has filled up with chips. Greg argues that the sparkly boot was snazzy and hollow enough on its own, and Joanne has clearly just added the chips because he's fat.
** John brings a Fabergé egg, which Greg deems 'horrible'. John's gloriously melodramatic sad frown when Greg says this is hilarious.
** Nick brings the soundtrack to Sleepy Hollow, which the show isn't allowed to play for music copyright reasons, so he just goes over to Greg and whispers it in his ear.
** Steve tricking Greg into making a 'hollow promise' to attend a man's stag do dressed as a Minotaur.
* All the contestants have a disdain for the first task, following a long string to eventually find a fish, which they all find slow, difficult, and boring... except for Nick, who scurries through the task extremely quickly and clearly enjoys himself throughout.
** Nick's scurrying gets him repeatedly compared to a little mouse throughout the rest of the episode.
** Sophie finds a mannequin in the garden hutch, and tests Alex to work out if it's what she's looking for:
--->'''Sophie:''' Look into my eyes, is it the mannequin? ''(she stares at Alex for a couple of seconds)'' It's not!
--->''(Alex looks confusedly at the camera)''
** Part of the task involves faking a mic error so the sound guy can attach a paper saying 'fish' to the contestants' backs. John is not happy about this:
--->'''John:''' It's not fair to assume that I should have thought the sound guy was a ''LIAR!''
*** This then leads to this discussion:
--->'''Alex:''' We were looking for one person to be brave enough to just go 'fish' immediately.
--->'''John:''' But why would you do that?
--->'''Alex:''' Well everything was a red herring as well which led you to fish, you were wearing fishing clothes and holding a fishing rod.
--->'''John:''' That's because we were fishing for something.
--->'''Alex:''' It was a fish.
* The contestants have to perform a piece of classical music without instruments.
** Sophie stomping about while drumming on glassware and the table (and accidentally smashing a glass in the process).
** Steve performs his piece while holding three bottles of water. When he bows at the end of his performance, all the water spills out of the bottles, and Steve looks genuinely annoyed with himself.
** Steve's performance is initially claimed as Beethoven's Symphony No.9, and sounds only barely like it. In the studio, he claims his actual piece was Greensleeves, so they play it again... and it sounds even less like that. Greg tells Steve he should have stuck with Beethoven.
** The highlight of this task is unquestionably Joanne, however, who forewent using any objects at all, and instead for some reason tried to communicate her piece through 'interpretive dance'. The prep video cutting from Nick carefully assembling bottles to Joanne just randomly clomping about the room is particularly funny.
--->'''Alex:''' It never occurred to her to make any noise at all.
*** It then gets worse in her actual performance as Joanne also heavily incorporates charades into her piece.
--->'''Joanne:''' Charades! Cause it's Christmas![[note]]Neither the filming date nor the airing date was anywhere near Christmas.[[note/]]
--->'''Greg:''' ''(sarcastically)'' Oh, five points then.
*** It gets worse - Joanne charades that the first syllable of her piece is 'beer', only for the actual answer to turn out to be 'Bolero'.
*** And yet somehow, despite all this, Joanne ends up getting three points, scoring higher than both Steve and Sophie, because Greg was actually able to guess that it was Bolero.
--->
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Changed line(s) 839 (click to see context) from:
to:
** After the task is complete, Nick begins shuffling back to the stage while still covered up by the rings.
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Changed line(s) 824,827 (click to see context) from:
*
[[/folder]]
[[/folder]]
to:
[[/folder]]
* The hampers come back for the third task, and the contestants have to create a picture of the person that gave them the hamper.
** Sophie mentions her grandfather looks like Steve Pemberton. In the studio it turns out that Steve and Sophie's grandad have actually met at a party, and Sophie tells a story from said party about her grandad insulting Melvyn Bragg from across the room.
** Joanne trying to capture the essence of John.
--->'''Joanne:''' He's the kind of guy who'd offer you a cushion if you needed to be on your knees around him.
** This bit from John's VT.
--->'''John:''' This isn't turning out that bad I have to say.
--->'''John:''' It's not actually going too badly.
--->'''John:''' ''(in a stressed whisper)'' It's not bad...
--->'''John:''' I don't think that's bad.
--->'''Alex:''' You've said that twelve times now.
** When the points are shown, the contestants' portraits are replaced with the pictures of them from this task.
* In the live task, the teams have to throw rubber rings onto their team members to completely cover them. Joanne objects to the (quite short) Nick being his team's catcher:
-->'''Joanne:''' He'll be gone in three rings!
[[/folder]]
----
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[[AC:A Three Ring Man]]
* The running gag in this episode of everyone treating Steve as much older than he is. Reaches its apex when Steve explains his choice to put a skull behind the head of his picture of Joanne in the third task as 'memento mori':
-->'''Greg:''' I'm not reminded enough of my own mortality, Steve.
-->'''Steve:''' Well I fuckin have been tonight.
* The prize task is the best thing for Greg to get into.
** John's entry.
--->'''John:''' Greg, you have gotta get into memes.
--->'''Greg:''' John I have not.
*** John's memes include a picture of Alex with the hashtag [=#IGot99ProblemsAndAlexHorneIsAllOfThem=].
** Nick suggests that Greg get into placing a single ice cube into a glass of white wine to keep it cold.
--->'''Greg:''' So what you've brought in, Nick, is the ability for me to have a glass of wine at a certain distance from my fridge.
** Sophie brings in a Zorb-esque plastic ball you can get into and roll around.
--->'''Sophie:''' Freedom!
--->'''Alex:''' It's the opposite of freedom.
** Sophie says she thought all the prize tasks were meant to be presents for Greg, when they're actually for the winner of the episode. Everyone then starts annoying Alex by acting as though they are presents for Greg, and Alex's seemingly genuine anger and frustration at this is hilarious.
--->'''Joanne:''' So far I've been being quite experiential with the presents...
--->'''Alex:''' THEY'RE NOT PRESENTS!
* The contestants are tasked with making a hamper for another contestant.
** Joanne treats Steve as though he is extremely old, doing so in two different ways - both by giving him items that an elderly person might use like litter-pickers and an assisted bath, and also including an hourglass and a skull 'because he will soon be dead'.
** Nick puts in his hamper for John an entire waste bin, which is bigger than the hamper itself.
* As the intro to the thumb war task, Alex says '1, 2, 3, 4' and waits for the contestants to respond. Only John correctly says 'I declare a thumb war'; the funniest response is Steve, though, who says 'Once I saw a fish alive'.
** All of the thumb wars.
** Nick builds a paper arena called Thumbly Stadium, in which he duels Alex while playing dramatic music on a keyboard at the same time.
** Sophie's terrible, surreal attempt, in which she is wearing a crown and a pink wig, and Alex is wearing a pigeon mask and draped in a veil.
** Joanne's game, 'Mustard Custard Oh My!'
** John dressing up as Alex and telling him that during the thumb war he can only speak in [[Music/QueenBand Queen]] song titles.
*** Discussing this in the studio, Greg asks John which Queen album a particular song comes from, and John initially gets it wrong. Greg jokes that John's going to be kicked out of the Queen fan club for that, and John reveals he actually is a member of the Queen fan club.
** Steve's intense war drama, in which he and Alex play thumbs fighting over territory, but who eventually reconcile against the horrors of war.
*
* The running gag in this episode of everyone treating Steve as much older than he is. Reaches its apex when Steve explains his choice to put a skull behind the head of his picture of Joanne in the third task as 'memento mori':
-->'''Greg:''' I'm not reminded enough of my own mortality, Steve.
-->'''Steve:''' Well I fuckin have been tonight.
* The prize task is the best thing for Greg to get into.
** John's entry.
--->'''John:''' Greg, you have gotta get into memes.
--->'''Greg:''' John I have not.
*** John's memes include a picture of Alex with the hashtag [=#IGot99ProblemsAndAlexHorneIsAllOfThem=].
** Nick suggests that Greg get into placing a single ice cube into a glass of white wine to keep it cold.
--->'''Greg:''' So what you've brought in, Nick, is the ability for me to have a glass of wine at a certain distance from my fridge.
** Sophie brings in a Zorb-esque plastic ball you can get into and roll around.
--->'''Sophie:''' Freedom!
--->'''Alex:''' It's the opposite of freedom.
** Sophie says she thought all the prize tasks were meant to be presents for Greg, when they're actually for the winner of the episode. Everyone then starts annoying Alex by acting as though they are presents for Greg, and Alex's seemingly genuine anger and frustration at this is hilarious.
--->'''Joanne:''' So far I've been being quite experiential with the presents...
--->'''Alex:''' THEY'RE NOT PRESENTS!
* The contestants are tasked with making a hamper for another contestant.
** Joanne treats Steve as though he is extremely old, doing so in two different ways - both by giving him items that an elderly person might use like litter-pickers and an assisted bath, and also including an hourglass and a skull 'because he will soon be dead'.
** Nick puts in his hamper for John an entire waste bin, which is bigger than the hamper itself.
* As the intro to the thumb war task, Alex says '1, 2, 3, 4' and waits for the contestants to respond. Only John correctly says 'I declare a thumb war'; the funniest response is Steve, though, who says 'Once I saw a fish alive'.
** All of the thumb wars.
** Nick builds a paper arena called Thumbly Stadium, in which he duels Alex while playing dramatic music on a keyboard at the same time.
** Sophie's terrible, surreal attempt, in which she is wearing a crown and a pink wig, and Alex is wearing a pigeon mask and draped in a veil.
** Joanne's game, 'Mustard Custard Oh My!'
** John dressing up as Alex and telling him that during the thumb war he can only speak in [[Music/QueenBand Queen]] song titles.
*** Discussing this in the studio, Greg asks John which Queen album a particular song comes from, and John initially gets it wrong. Greg jokes that John's going to be kicked out of the Queen fan club for that, and John reveals he actually is a member of the Queen fan club.
** Steve's intense war drama, in which he and Alex play thumbs fighting over territory, but who eventually reconcile against the horrors of war.
*
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Changed line(s) 744 (click to see context) from:
** As he finishes his dot-to-dot, Steve tells Alex that he hopes there'll be a red dot in the bottom corner of it by the time it's shown in the studio. His picture is revealed to be a copy of the Mona Lisa, signed and in a frame, with a sticker in the bottom corner... which the production team have coloured in ''yellow', which, Alex explains, means that the picture hasn't been sold but an offer has been made.
to:
** As he finishes his dot-to-dot, Steve tells Alex that he hopes there'll be a red dot in the bottom corner of it by the time it's shown in the studio. His picture is revealed to be a copy of the Mona Lisa, signed and in a frame, with a sticker in the bottom corner... which the production team have coloured in ''yellow', ''yellow'', which, Alex explains, means that the picture hasn't been sold but an offer has been made.
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Changed line(s) 756,757 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Greg:''' OK, I'm gonna turn away, and then I'm gonna experience it.
--->'''Joanne:''' No you have to look at it to experience it.
--->'''Joanne:''' No you have to look at it to experience it.
to:
Changed line(s) 759 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Joanne:''' I thought it was important to raise awareness of Che on a balloon.
to:
Changed line(s) 772 (click to see context) from:
--->'''Sophie:''' You really want this, don't you.
to:
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Changed line(s) 786 (click to see context) from:
to:
** Nick's amazing disaster attempt. He initially seems to be doing fairly well, but then inexplicably flips himself over while still tied to the bed, and ends up trying to crawl out of the lab while underneath the bed. He can only be described as looking like a sort of large struggling insect. What tops it off is this quote from Nick, while stuck under the bed in the doorway
--->'''Nick:''' ''(sounding genuinely broken and distressed)'' I don't think I've done this one right.
*** In the studio, Nick is at a total loss to explain why he flipped at all.
* The little versions of the contestants used for the parking live task. Even better when Alex reveals that when they are eliminated the little contestants have to be taken away to sit on the elimination bench, and Sophie refuses to give hers up.
-->'''Alex:''' I must take Small Sophie away from you.
-->'''Sophie:''' No you can't!
** In the third round, John chooses a horse and manages to park it very carefully. Steve also chose the horse:
--->'''Steve:''' John, any advice on the horse?
--->'''John:''' Just whack it right off the end.
--->'''Nick:''' ''(sounding genuinely broken and distressed)'' I don't think I've done this one right.
*** In the studio, Nick is at a total loss to explain why he flipped at all.
* The little versions of the contestants used for the parking live task. Even better when Alex reveals that when they are eliminated the little contestants have to be taken away to sit on the elimination bench, and Sophie refuses to give hers up.
-->'''Alex:''' I must take Small Sophie away from you.
-->'''Sophie:''' No you can't!
** In the third round, John chooses a horse and manages to park it very carefully. Steve also chose the horse:
--->'''Steve:''' John, any advice on the horse?
--->'''John:''' Just whack it right off the end.
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[[AC:Snooker Cue Umbrella Chin]]
* The prize task is most extraordinary picture.
** Nick's entry, a sign outside a church whose relative text sizes make it appear to be shouting random words - as Nick demonstrates:
--->'''Nick:''' St Anne's Church home made cream TEAS 3pm TILL 5pm SUNDAY!
** Joanne's absurd entry.
*** Before she shows it, she claims her picture is an experience:
--->'''Greg:''' OK, I'm gonna turn away, and then I'm gonna experience it.
--->'''Joanne:''' No you have to look at it to experience it.
*** It turns out to be [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext a picture of Che Guevara on a balloon.]]
--->'''Joanne:''' I thought it was important to raise awareness of Che on a balloon.
*** She then promises that if she wins the task, she will donate her fee to the Cuban revolution.
*** Greg asks Joanne what the message she's trying to send with her picture is. While Joanne fumbles for an answer, an audience member yells out 'Inflation!'
* The first task of the episode begins 'when Alex interrupts you'. For most of the contestants, this works fine, but Alex accidentally misses his chance to interrupt John, who, with a hilariously devilish silent smile, then refuses to say anything else so he can't be interrupted. Alex thus decides he must 'interrupt John physically', and chases him across the house garden.
** Steve's sense of childlike wonder in this task when he discovers the caravan has a secret room.
** Tasked to bear the most impressive load, Steve finds a stuffed white tiger which he puts around his neck, and then adds to the image by stacking several (fake) people on top of one another as if they were all riding the tiger. Unfortunately it's a very windy day, so one of the rider's heads falls off, and the picture of him bearing the load has all the people toppling over to the side.
** John also has a great visual image - in his case the 'Gutter of Gregs', a long pipe across his shoulders filled with Greg portraits, with a Greg cardboard cutout astride his neck.
* For the second time in the episode Alex makes a mistake in his clever task setup. In this one the task is suspended from thin string above a hairdryer to make it look like the hairdryer is keeping the task in mid-air; when the contestants turn the hairdryer off, Alex makes the task drop. Unfortunately, he does it too early while Steve is doing it, ruining the illusion.
** The task is to do the best thing in mid-air. In the studio, the contestants all see how high they can jump, with Nick clearly being the best jumper. Makes it all the more ironic when we see Nick's actual attempt, in which he isn't in mid-air at all, instead having inexplicably jammed himself in a stack of tyres and got Alex to roll him towards some cans. Alex comments that it's almost like Nick was doing a completely different task.
** The other entries are all pretty good too:
*** Joanne is a bride who's been stabbed in the head on her wedding day. When Greg notices the bride has an eyepatch, Joanne explains it away as the bride having had laser-eye surgery on her way to the wedding.
*** Steve playing a skydiver with a failed parachute, including putting rubber bands on his face to simulate G forces.
*** John constructing an elaborate scene involving fire in a bucket to make it look like he's being shot out of a cannon.
--->'''Sophie:''' You really want this, don't you.
*** Sophie, however, takes the five points for her genuinely insane photo, taken of her bouncing up and down on a trampoline in a tutu while pouring milk from a teapot onto Alex wearing a pigeon mask.
* From the task to use ties to tie yourself to a bed:
** Joanne describing the task's energy as like 'a low-end brothel'.
** Also, Joanne leaving the task by walking out the door still tied to the bed.
** This from Sophie:
--->'''Sophie:''' I'm just gonna strategise here first.
--->'''Alex:''' How long are you gonna strategise for?
--->'''Sophie:''' Just a second.
--->''(she lies completely motionless for several moments)''
--->'''Sophie:''' Done.
** Sophie worming her way out of the lab to ensure she remains horizontal at all times.
** Steve jams the mechanical tie rack so the ties keep falling onto him.
--->'''Steve:''' I can't keep up with the number of ties the tie gods are giving me! It's a whole [[IncrediblyLamePun tie-rade]].
* The prize task is most extraordinary picture.
** Nick's entry, a sign outside a church whose relative text sizes make it appear to be shouting random words - as Nick demonstrates:
--->'''Nick:''' St Anne's Church home made cream TEAS 3pm TILL 5pm SUNDAY!
** Joanne's absurd entry.
*** Before she shows it, she claims her picture is an experience:
--->'''Greg:''' OK, I'm gonna turn away, and then I'm gonna experience it.
--->'''Joanne:''' No you have to look at it to experience it.
*** It turns out to be [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext a picture of Che Guevara on a balloon.]]
--->'''Joanne:''' I thought it was important to raise awareness of Che on a balloon.
*** She then promises that if she wins the task, she will donate her fee to the Cuban revolution.
*** Greg asks Joanne what the message she's trying to send with her picture is. While Joanne fumbles for an answer, an audience member yells out 'Inflation!'
* The first task of the episode begins 'when Alex interrupts you'. For most of the contestants, this works fine, but Alex accidentally misses his chance to interrupt John, who, with a hilariously devilish silent smile, then refuses to say anything else so he can't be interrupted. Alex thus decides he must 'interrupt John physically', and chases him across the house garden.
** Steve's sense of childlike wonder in this task when he discovers the caravan has a secret room.
** Tasked to bear the most impressive load, Steve finds a stuffed white tiger which he puts around his neck, and then adds to the image by stacking several (fake) people on top of one another as if they were all riding the tiger. Unfortunately it's a very windy day, so one of the rider's heads falls off, and the picture of him bearing the load has all the people toppling over to the side.
** John also has a great visual image - in his case the 'Gutter of Gregs', a long pipe across his shoulders filled with Greg portraits, with a Greg cardboard cutout astride his neck.
* For the second time in the episode Alex makes a mistake in his clever task setup. In this one the task is suspended from thin string above a hairdryer to make it look like the hairdryer is keeping the task in mid-air; when the contestants turn the hairdryer off, Alex makes the task drop. Unfortunately, he does it too early while Steve is doing it, ruining the illusion.
** The task is to do the best thing in mid-air. In the studio, the contestants all see how high they can jump, with Nick clearly being the best jumper. Makes it all the more ironic when we see Nick's actual attempt, in which he isn't in mid-air at all, instead having inexplicably jammed himself in a stack of tyres and got Alex to roll him towards some cans. Alex comments that it's almost like Nick was doing a completely different task.
** The other entries are all pretty good too:
*** Joanne is a bride who's been stabbed in the head on her wedding day. When Greg notices the bride has an eyepatch, Joanne explains it away as the bride having had laser-eye surgery on her way to the wedding.
*** Steve playing a skydiver with a failed parachute, including putting rubber bands on his face to simulate G forces.
*** John constructing an elaborate scene involving fire in a bucket to make it look like he's being shot out of a cannon.
--->'''Sophie:''' You really want this, don't you.
*** Sophie, however, takes the five points for her genuinely insane photo, taken of her bouncing up and down on a trampoline in a tutu while pouring milk from a teapot onto Alex wearing a pigeon mask.
* From the task to use ties to tie yourself to a bed:
** Joanne describing the task's energy as like 'a low-end brothel'.
** Also, Joanne leaving the task by walking out the door still tied to the bed.
** This from Sophie:
--->'''Sophie:''' I'm just gonna strategise here first.
--->'''Alex:''' How long are you gonna strategise for?
--->'''Sophie:''' Just a second.
--->''(she lies completely motionless for several moments)''
--->'''Sophie:''' Done.
** Sophie worming her way out of the lab to ensure she remains horizontal at all times.
** Steve jams the mechanical tie rack so the ties keep falling onto him.
--->'''Steve:''' I can't keep up with the number of ties the tie gods are giving me! It's a whole [[IncrediblyLamePun tie-rade]].
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** As he finishes his dot-to-dot, Steve tells Alex that he hopes there'll be a red dot in the bottom corner of it by the time it's shown in the studio. His picture is revealed to be a copy of the Mona Lisa, signed and in a frame, with a sticker in the bottom corner... which the production team have coloured in ''yellow', which, Alex explains, means that the picture hasn't been sold but an offer has been made.
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* Steve and Nick in the puzzle task initially think they've solved it when they fix a clock in the caravan to a particular time.
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* Steve and Nick in the puzzle task initially think they've solved it when they fix a the clock in the caravan lounge to a particular time.
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--->'''Joanne:''' Ohhh... it's like my father's alive again. It's his anniversary today, been dead 21 years. ...You smell like him.
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*** Susan goes into Qrs' room to find his suitcase full of forks, which [[{{Corpsing}} reduces her to a helpless, almost catatonic state of laughter as she struggles to process it.]] When Greg mentions this to her, she dissolves into even harder laughter in the studio.
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*** Susan goes into Qrs' room to find his suitcase full of forks, forks and marbles, which [[{{Corpsing}} reduces her to a helpless, almost catatonic state of laughter as she struggles to process it.]] When Greg mentions this to her, she dissolves into even harder laughter in the studio.
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** When they get a moment's rest, Susan offers Sue a couple of cucumber slices to eat, except Sue then immediately puts them on her eyes. Even better, Qrs interrupts at exactly that moment.
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* Nick debuts perhaps the most bizarre and impractical outfit in Taskmaster history, attempting pre-recorded tasks in a Dracula costume. Eagle-eyed viewers will notics that, like any true vampire, he casts no reflection throughout the season.
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* Nick debuts perhaps the most bizarre and impractical outfit in Taskmaster history, attempting pre-recorded tasks in a Dracula costume. Eagle-eyed viewers will notics notice that, like any true vampire, he casts no reflection throughout the season.
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** Much
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** Much There is much discussion of the wild horses that were roaming the area while the contestants were completing this task. The crowning moment comes when Alex claims the horses - which were there for all five contestants - were not meant to be part of it:
--->'''Alex:''' We were very worried, we didn't know they were going to be there.
--->'''John:''' Considering the number of health and safety discussions I've had over the course of this series... not one mention of the fact I was doing an enormous dot-to-dot around wild horses.
--->'''Alex:''' Mmm. And there were land mines.
--->'''Alex:''' We were very worried, we didn't know they were going to be there.
--->'''John:''' Considering the number of health and safety discussions I've had over the course of this series... not one mention of the fact I was doing an enormous dot-to-dot around wild horses.
--->'''Alex:''' Mmm. And there were land mines.
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**
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** Sure enough, when Nick's drawing gets shown in the studio, he has basically just done a very long line. Guesses for what Nick might have been trying to depict range from 'a balloon' to 'an oboe', with Greg pointing out the scope of guesses clearly doesn't bode well for whatever it turns out to be.
--->'''Nick:''' When I tell you, you'll be kicking yourself.
--->'''Greg:''' Go on.
--->'''Nick:''' It's a very happy snake.
** Joanne's reaction to seeing her dot-to-dot for the first time is 'it's not that bad!'. Unfortunately for her, it turns out her drawing ''is'' that bad, as Greg thinks it is either an anchor or the Fallopian tubes, when it is actually 'one of those moustaches, like the lads on the penny-farthings have'.
*** Joanne does little to dispel Greg's Fallopian guess when she describes the skin under the moustache as 'the labial folds'. She's absolutely right, but it doesn't stop her drawing from being interpreted as a 'vaginal moustache'.
* Steve and Nick in the puzzle task initially think they've solved it when they fix a clock in the caravan to a particular time.
-->'''Steve:''' Stop the clock?
-->'''Alex:''' Well, you have stopped the clock.
* The sheer chaos of the toilet paper live task. Particularly when John puts his hands up to serve his ten-second penalty for breaking his loo roll, and Alex initially mistakes it for John celebrating victory in the task.
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[[AC:Apropos of Apoppo]]
* The prize task is best thing for a granny.
** Nick brings a good luck potion.
--->'''Nick:''' Cause it feels like, when you're on the cusp, you'll need all the luck you can get.
--->'''Alex:''' Hello to all the grannies watching!
** Greg's frustration that Joanne and Sophie's prizes, a grille and a form-fitting onesie respectively, both do not fit his idea of a kind, sweet granny, and instead envision her as what he calls 'a blinged-up sex maniac'.
** Sophie suggests her granny might do a slut drop in her onesie. It turns out Alex doesn't know what a slut drop is, so Sophie demonstrates in the studio, at some length.
** Steve brings in what Greg thinks is the sweetest prize, a birthday card he made for his granny when he was eight, with a poem inside... and then he reveals he's also brought another card he made when he was thirteen, which has a risqué image on the front and contains the message 'Beware, Alice is an erotic sex object (ask Arthur)' in newspaper cuttings.
* The gloves task:
** The task stipulates you can only interact with the gloves by shaking their hands, but Joanne immediately begins intensely fondling and sniffing them, explaining it away as 'an Irish greeting'.
** This line from Joanne, when feeling the glove that has an actual human hand in it:
--->'''Joanne:''' Eurgh, if that was a human hand I'd assume it was contagious. ...Herpes.
*** Even better, her guess of 'herpes' still allows her to solve the acrostic part of the task as it begins with the same letter H as 'hand'.
** While Joanne is doing the acrostic part of the task, it turns out she doesn't actually know Alex's surname.
--->'''Joanne:''' Is this you trying to teach me your surname?
--->'''Alex:''' What's my surname, Joanne?
--->'''Joanne:''' ...Taskmaster.
** Steve coming up with themed names for all of his guesses, such as 'Tom A'Tosoup'.
** Nick finds the glove containing rum, which starts leaking, and he says 'I think the glove's doing a wee on me'. He then almost immediately attempts to drink it.
** When John, who is teetotal, discovers that the 'R' glove stood for 'Rum':
--->'''John:''' I'm slightly concerned that my R stood for 'Relapse'.[[note]]Don't worry, Alex confirmed the glove was filled with non-alcoholic rum.[[/note]]
* Steve imitating an angry farmer in the intro to this episode's location task:
-->'''Steve:''' GET OFF MY LAND!
** The task is to create a dot-to-dot picture. Being the two older men on the panel, Greg and Steve start reminiscing about dot-to-dot puzzles. Steve pictures the scene: 'sitting next to granny, doing the dot to dots... [[CallBack drinking the potion...]]'.
*** This is funny enough on its own, but what makes it particularly amusing is Greg seemingly not noticing Steve's [[CallBack Call-Back]] and just moving straight on with the show... while Alex very clearly has noticed, and makes a truly remarkable WTF face.
** Much
** Steve stepping in a horse poo as he leaves the task.
**
* The prize task is best thing for a granny.
** Nick brings a good luck potion.
--->'''Nick:''' Cause it feels like, when you're on the cusp, you'll need all the luck you can get.
--->'''Alex:''' Hello to all the grannies watching!
** Greg's frustration that Joanne and Sophie's prizes, a grille and a form-fitting onesie respectively, both do not fit his idea of a kind, sweet granny, and instead envision her as what he calls 'a blinged-up sex maniac'.
** Sophie suggests her granny might do a slut drop in her onesie. It turns out Alex doesn't know what a slut drop is, so Sophie demonstrates in the studio, at some length.
** Steve brings in what Greg thinks is the sweetest prize, a birthday card he made for his granny when he was eight, with a poem inside... and then he reveals he's also brought another card he made when he was thirteen, which has a risqué image on the front and contains the message 'Beware, Alice is an erotic sex object (ask Arthur)' in newspaper cuttings.
* The gloves task:
** The task stipulates you can only interact with the gloves by shaking their hands, but Joanne immediately begins intensely fondling and sniffing them, explaining it away as 'an Irish greeting'.
** This line from Joanne, when feeling the glove that has an actual human hand in it:
--->'''Joanne:''' Eurgh, if that was a human hand I'd assume it was contagious. ...Herpes.
*** Even better, her guess of 'herpes' still allows her to solve the acrostic part of the task as it begins with the same letter H as 'hand'.
** While Joanne is doing the acrostic part of the task, it turns out she doesn't actually know Alex's surname.
--->'''Joanne:''' Is this you trying to teach me your surname?
--->'''Alex:''' What's my surname, Joanne?
--->'''Joanne:''' ...Taskmaster.
** Steve coming up with themed names for all of his guesses, such as 'Tom A'Tosoup'.
** Nick finds the glove containing rum, which starts leaking, and he says 'I think the glove's doing a wee on me'. He then almost immediately attempts to drink it.
** When John, who is teetotal, discovers that the 'R' glove stood for 'Rum':
--->'''John:''' I'm slightly concerned that my R stood for 'Relapse'.[[note]]Don't worry, Alex confirmed the glove was filled with non-alcoholic rum.[[/note]]
* Steve imitating an angry farmer in the intro to this episode's location task:
-->'''Steve:''' GET OFF MY LAND!
** The task is to create a dot-to-dot picture. Being the two older men on the panel, Greg and Steve start reminiscing about dot-to-dot puzzles. Steve pictures the scene: 'sitting next to granny, doing the dot to dots... [[CallBack drinking the potion...]]'.
*** This is funny enough on its own, but what makes it particularly amusing is Greg seemingly not noticing Steve's [[CallBack Call-Back]] and just moving straight on with the show... while Alex very clearly has noticed, and makes a truly remarkable WTF face.
** Much
** Steve stepping in a horse poo as he leaves the task.
**
