History Funny / RedStormRising

* The surreal, almost Creator/MontyPython-esque moment when the downed American flier aboard his life raft is "taken prisoner" by a downed Russian flier - who quickly rescinds his claim when he learns that the American is the one with the ''[[EverythingsEvenWorseWithSharks akula]]'' repellent.

* The exchange between HMS ''Battleaxe'' and USS ''Reuben James'' on the subject of names:

-->'''Sgt Smith:''' You mean I've been trying to walk a damned runner into the ground?\\

-->'''''Reuben James''''': At least we don't name warships for our mother-in-law.

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on ''Kirov'', a Norwegian submarine attacks the Soviet battle group and screws up his approach. ''Chicago'' is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon missile attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out a Soviet destroyer that had them
Dead to rights and would've sank the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

* The exchange between the ''HMS Battleaxe'' and the ''USS Reuben James'' on the subject of names:

* The exchange between the ''HMS Battleaxe'' and the ''USS Ruben James'' on the subject of names:
-->'''''Battleaxe''''': What the devil is a Ruben James?
-->'''''Ruben James''''': At least we don't name warships for our mother-in-law.

* After spending the night watching Russian movies via satellite intercept, a somewhat delirious Bob Toland realizes he'd been singing in Russian while giving his money to a toll booth worker. He wonders what the toll worker must have been thinking, seeing a uniformed US Navy officer singing in Russian in the midst of growing tensions between NATO and the Soviet Union.

-->'''Alekseyev:''' A Guards regiment, eh, Comrade Colonel? Elite soldiers of the Red Army? These tit-sucking children couldn’t guard a Turkish whorehouse, '''much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!''' And what have you been doing for the past four years commanding this rolling circus, Comrade Colonel? You have learned to kill your whole command '''three times!''' Your artillery observers are not located properly. Your tanks and infantry carriers still can’t coordinate their movements, and your tank gunners can’t find targets three meters high! If that had been a NATO force holding that ridge, you and your command would be '''dead!''' “The loss of these people is no great penalty for the State, but that is valuable equipment, burning valuable fuel, shooting valuable ordnance, '''and taking up my valuable time!''' Comrade Colonel, I must leave you now. First I will throw up. Then I will fly to my command post. I will be back. When I come back, we will run this exercise again. Your men will perform properly, Comrade Colonel, or you will spend the rest of your miserable life counting trees!

* General Alekseyev's hilarious line after observing a training exercise.
-->'''Alekseyev:''' These men aren't fit to guard a Turkish whorehouse, much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty's=] crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

-->'''Alekseyev:''' These men aren't fit to guard a Turkish whorehouse, much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!

* The wonderful description of Alekseyev commandeering the troop train in Moscow. He arrives abruptly, screams at the divisional commander, who goes off to scream at ''his'' regimental commanders, who go off to scream at ''their'' battalion commanders, and all the way down the line for ten minutes until the screaming was done at the squad level. Only then does the division finally get moving. Armies, huh...

-->'''Alekseyev:''' ''These men aren't fit to guard a Turkish whorehouse, much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!''

'''Edwards:''' You ''have'' walked a marathoner into the friggn' ground.

For a very serious work about World War III, ''RedStormRising'' has a few [[GallowsHumor darkly humorous]] moments.

* The surreal, almost MontyPython-esque moment when the downed American flier aboard his life raft is "taken prisoner" by a downed Russian flier - who quickly rescinds his claim when he learns that the American is the one with the ''[[EverythingsEvenWorseWithSharks akula]]'' repellent.

--> '''First Lieutenant Michael Edwards:''' Leet's have an attitude check!\\

'''Tower crew:''' Fuckit!

--> Chapayev (while awaiting rescue with Commander Davis): Aren't we two sorry sons of bitches.
* The wonderful description of Alekseyev commandeering the troop train in Moscow. He arrives abruptly, screams at the divisional commander, who goes off to scream at ''his'' regimental commanders, who go off to scream at ''their'' battalion commanders, and all the way down the line for ten minutes until the screaming was done at the squad level. Only then does the division finally get moving. Armies, huh...

For a very serious work about World War III, ''RedStormRising'' has a few darkly humorous moments.