History Funny / RedStormRising

31st Jul '17 6:12:27 AM YT45
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* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on ''Kirov'', a Norwegian submarine attacks the Soviet battle group and screws up his approach. ''Chicago'' is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon missile attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out a Soviet destroyer that had them
Dead to rights and would've sank the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

to:

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on ''Kirov'', a Norwegian submarine attacks the Soviet battle group and screws up his approach. ''Chicago'' is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon missile attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out a Soviet destroyer that had them
Dead
them dead to rights and would've sank the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.
31st Jul '17 6:11:51 AM YT45
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* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

to:

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, ''Kirov'', a Norwegian submarine attacks the Soviet battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago ''Chicago'' is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon missile attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats a Soviet destroyer that had them
Dead to rights and
would've destroyed sank the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.



* The exchange between the ''HMS Battleaxe'' and the ''USS Reuben James'' on the subject of names:

to:

* The exchange between the ''HMS Battleaxe'' HMS ''Battleaxe'' and the ''USS Reuben USS ''Reuben James'' on the subject of names:
28th May '17 7:05:39 AM pyrotorch246
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* The exchange between the ''HMS Battleaxe'' and the ''USS Ruben James'' on the subject of names:
-->'''''Battleaxe''''': What the devil is a Ruben James?
-->'''''Ruben James''''': At least we don't name warships for our mother-in-law.

to:

* The exchange between the ''HMS Battleaxe'' and the ''USS Ruben Reuben James'' on the subject of names:
-->'''''Battleaxe''''': What the devil is a Ruben Reuben James?
-->'''''Ruben -->'''''Reuben James''''': At least we don't name warships for our mother-in-law.
28th May '17 7:04:42 AM pyrotorch246
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* After spending the night watching Russian movies via satellite intercept, a somewhat delirious Bob Toland realizes he'd been singing in Russian while giving his money to a toll booth worker. He wonders what the toll worker must have been thinking, seeing a uniformed US Navy officer singing in Russian in the midst of growing tensions between NATO and the Soviet Union.

to:

* After spending the night watching Russian movies via satellite intercept, a somewhat delirious Bob Toland realizes he'd been singing in Russian while giving his money to a toll booth worker. He wonders what the toll worker must have been thinking, seeing a uniformed US Navy officer singing in Russian in the midst of growing tensions between NATO and the Soviet Union.Union.
* The exchange between the ''HMS Battleaxe'' and the ''USS Ruben James'' on the subject of names:
-->'''''Battleaxe''''': What the devil is a Ruben James?
-->'''''Ruben James''''': At least we don't name warships for our mother-in-law.
1st Feb '16 2:15:03 PM randomguy566
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1st Feb '16 2:14:48 PM randomguy566
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-->'''Alekseyev:''' A Guards regiment, eh, Comrade Colonel? Elite soldiers of the Red Army? These tit-sucking children couldnít guard a Turkish whorehouse, '''much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!''' And what have you been doing for the past four years commanding this rolling circus, Comrade Colonel? You have learned to kill your whole command '''three times!''' Your artillery observers are not located properly. Your tanks and infantry carriers still canít coordinate their movements, and your tank gunners canít find targets three meters high! If that had been a NATO force holding that ridge, you and your command would be '''dead!''' ďThe loss of these people is no great penalty for the State, but that is valuable equipment, burning valuable fuel, shooting valuable ordnance, '''and taking up my valuable time!''' Comrade Colonel, I must leave you now. First I will throw up. Then I will fly to my command post. I will be back. When I come back, we will run this exercise again. Your men will perform properly, Comrade Colonel, or you will spend the rest of your miserable life counting trees!

to:

-->'''Alekseyev:''' A Guards regiment, eh, Comrade Colonel? Elite soldiers of the Red Army? These tit-sucking children couldnít guard a Turkish whorehouse, '''much ''much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!''' it!'' And what have you been doing for the past four years commanding this rolling circus, Comrade Colonel? You have learned to kill your whole command '''three times!''' ''three times!'' Your artillery observers are not located properly. Your tanks and infantry carriers still canít coordinate their movements, and your tank gunners canít find targets three meters high! If that had been a NATO force holding that ridge, you and your command would be '''dead!''' ďThe ''dead!'' The loss of these people is no great penalty for the State, but that is valuable equipment, burning valuable fuel, shooting valuable ordnance, '''and ''and taking up my valuable time!''' time!'' Comrade Colonel, I must leave you now. First I will throw up. Then I will fly to my command post. I will be back. When I come back, we will run this exercise again. Your men will perform properly, Comrade Colonel, or you will spend the rest of your miserable life counting trees!
1st Feb '16 2:13:57 PM randomguy566
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* General Alekseyev's hilarious line after observing a training exercise.
-->'''Alekseyev:''' These men aren't fit to guard a Turkish whorehouse, much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!

to:

* General Alekseyev's hilarious line TheReasonYouSuckSpeech to a regimental commander after observing a training exercise.
-->'''Alekseyev:''' A Guards regiment, eh, Comrade Colonel? Elite soldiers of the Red Army? These men aren't fit to tit-sucking children couldnít guard a Turkish whorehouse, much '''much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!it!''' And what have you been doing for the past four years commanding this rolling circus, Comrade Colonel? You have learned to kill your whole command '''three times!''' Your artillery observers are not located properly. Your tanks and infantry carriers still canít coordinate their movements, and your tank gunners canít find targets three meters high! If that had been a NATO force holding that ridge, you and your command would be '''dead!''' ďThe loss of these people is no great penalty for the State, but that is valuable equipment, burning valuable fuel, shooting valuable ordnance, '''and taking up my valuable time!''' Comrade Colonel, I must leave you now. First I will throw up. Then I will fly to my command post. I will be back. When I come back, we will run this exercise again. Your men will perform properly, Comrade Colonel, or you will spend the rest of your miserable life counting trees!
21st Apr '15 2:19:36 AM TinMan
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* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

to:

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.instantly.
* After spending the night watching Russian movies via satellite intercept, a somewhat delirious Bob Toland realizes he'd been singing in Russian while giving his money to a toll booth worker. He wonders what the toll worker must have been thinking, seeing a uniformed US Navy officer singing in Russian in the midst of growing tensions between NATO and the Soviet Union.
24th Sep '14 7:39:23 AM Malchus
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* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty's=] crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.

to:

* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty's=] [=McCafferty=] and his crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.
24th Sep '14 7:38:32 AM Malchus
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-->'''Alekseyev:''' These men aren't fit to guard a Turkish whorehouse, much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!

to:

-->'''Alekseyev:''' These men aren't fit to guard a Turkish whorehouse, much less do anything worthwhile inside of it!it!
* During Captain [=McCafferty's=] attack on Kirov, a Norwegian submarine attacks the battle group and screws up his approach. Chicago is then forced to make an impromptu Harpoon attack on the battle group and quickly withdraw before seeing if their Harpoons hit anything. He later meets the Norwegian captain amusingly drunk in a bar and confronts him over it, only for the Norwegian to wrap him in a bear hug and offer to buy [=McCafferty's=] crew a drink since the Harpoons took out boats that would've destroyed the Norwegian sub otherwise. [=McCafferty's=] resentment vanishes almost instantly.
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