History Funny / PiratesOfTheCaribbeanTheCurseOfTheBlackPearl

** Awesomely called back in the third film. Jack appears on the mast of the ''Black Pearl'', '''riding his ship across a desert.''' Made absolutely priceless as, just as the ship enters the water and the awesome music fades:
--->'''Ragetti:''' ''[shakily points at the ''Pearl'']'' ...boat...

Barbossa: I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request. Means "no".

--->'''Elizabeth:''' Whose side is Jack on?\\

---> '''Jack:''' ''[in skeleton form, examining his own hand]'' That's interesting... ''[starts walking the medallion across his fingers and grins at Barbossa]'' Couldn't resist, mate.

-->'''Ragetti:''' (shakily points at the ''Pearl'') ''...boat...''

-->'''*SLAP*'''\\
'''Jack''': I'm not sure I deserved that...

-->'''*SLAP*'''\\
'''Jack''': I ''may'' have deserved that one...

-->'''*SLAP*'''\\
'''Will''': I suppose you didn't deserve that one either?\\
'''Jack''': No, ''that'' one I deserved.

--> '''Elizabeth:''' Whose side is Jack on?
--> '''Will:''' At the moment?

---> '''Jack:''' [in skeleton form, examining his own hand] That's interesting... [starts walking the medallion across his fingers and grins at Barbossa] Couldn't resist, mate.

-->'''Barbossa''': It's not possible! \\
'''Jack''': Not ''probable''.

-->'''Ragetti''': Is it supposed to be doing that?\\
'''Pintel''': They're stealing our ship!\\
'''Ragetti''': ''''' BLOODY PIRATES!'''''

--> '''Jack Sparrow''' "[[IronicEcho Why is the rum ALWAYS gone?]] (''staggers'') "...oh, that's why."
** The best part of the above is when Jack picks up his pistol - the one with the single shot he was saving for Barbossa - and ''almost'' shoots Elizabeth.

-->'''Elizabeth:''' So that's it, then. ''That's'' the secret, ''grand'' adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow. You spent ''three days'' lying on a beach, drinking rum. \\

** "'Must have been terrible to be trapped here, Jack. Must have been terrible for you'- WELL IT BLOODY IS NOW!"

'''Barbossa:''' Yes. We know ''that''. Anything ''else?''

-->'''Jack Sparrow''': Mr. Cotton! Do you have the courage and fortitude to follow orders and stay true in the face of danger and almost certain ''death''?! (''Cotton is silent'') '''Mr. Cotton!''' Answer, man!
-->'''Gibbs''': He's a mute, sir; poor devil got his tongue cut out! So he's trained [[PollyWantsAMicrophone the parrot to talk for him]]. (''beat'') No one's yet figured ''how''...
-->'''Jack Sparrow''': Mr. Cotton's... parrot! Same question.
-->'''Cotton's Parrot''': ''Awk!'' Wind in yer sails, wind in yer sails.
-->'''Gibbs''': Mostly we figure that means "yes".
-->'''Jack Sparrow''': Of course it does!

* "You will always remember this as the day that--" (''slips'')

-->'''Pirate 1:''' Hello! ''(throws a bomb on the ground. It fails to explode. The pirate looks dejected. Will happily reaches for his sword. A second pirate runs past him)''.
-->'''Pirate 2:''' Outta my way, scum! ''(Clubs Will on the head, knocking him out cold)''.

-->'''Jack''': ''(Jack has just been ordered to explain why he's aboard the ''Interceptor'' and not to lie)'' Alright, I confess. [[SarcasticConfession It is my intention to commandeer one of these ships, pick up a crew in]] [[WretchedHive Tortuga]], then raid, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out.
-->'''Murtogg''': I said no lies!
-->'''Mullroy''': I think he's telling the truth...
-->'''Murtogg''': If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us!
-->'''Jack''': [[RefugeInAudacity Unless he knew you wouldn't believe the truth, even if he told it to you.]]

-->'''Barbossa''': Why thank ye, Jack.\\
'''Jack Sparrow''': You're welcome.\\
'''Barbossa''': Oh, not you. [[TropeNamer We named the monkey Jack]].
* The list of Jack's crimes as he's about to be executed, including "impersonating a clergyman of the Church of England", which elicits a wry grin from a reminiscing Jack.
** From the beginning of that scene, the herald says "Jack Sparrow!" and Jack sighs and says "[[InsistentTerminology Captain!]], ''Captain'' Jack Sparrow!"

-->'''Jack Sparrow''': ''If you were waiting for the opportune moment...that was it.''
* Governor Swann's fight with the skeleton arm - after he smashes it with a hammer for trying to steal his wig.

-->'''Pirate:''' You're s'posed to be ''dead!''
-->'''Jack:''' ''(sounding genuinely confused)'' Am I not?

-->'''Captain Jack Sparrow:''' She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Captain Norrington, just like ''she'' promised, and you get to die for her, just like ''you'' promised. So we're all men of our word, really. [[{{Beat}} *beat*]] Except for Elizabeth, [[CaptainObvious who is, in fact, a woman]].

-->'''Barbossa''': I'm curious. After killin' me, [[AndThenWhat what was it you were plannin' on doin' next?]]

** One of the crew actually tosses Gibbs's flask into the cannon as well, despite his protests. When they fire on the Pearl, it winds up in Jack's cell, and he finds that it's empty. Then he returns it to Gibbs when he gets back to the Interceptor, who's mid-fight with a bunch of pirates. It's finding out that his flask is empty that ''really'' pisses Gibbs off.

-->'''Pintel''': ''[lightly]'' Course it was only after that [[LaserGuidedKarma we found out that we needed his blood to end the curse.]]
-->'''Ragetti''': That's what you call ironic.
-->'''Pintel''': ''[[[ActuallyPrettyFunny chuckles]]]''

-->'''Ragetti''': That's what you call a bit of dramatic irony.

** "Must have been terrible to be trapped here, Jack. Must have been terrible for you- WELL IT BLOODY IS NOW!"

-->'''Willl:''' Elizabeth goes free!\\

* The scene where [[ThoseTwoBadGuys Pintel and Ragetti]] tell Will about his father and what they did to him is very dark and serious, and then they finish up:
-->'''Pintel''': Course it was only after that [[LaserGuidedKarma we found out that we needed his blood to end the curse.]]

'''Jack''': I may have deserved that one.

* "You will always remember this as the day that you ''almost'' caught [[InsistentTerminology Captain]] Ja-" (''slips'')

* [[NoodleIncident "...And then they made me their chief."]]

* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JImcvtJzIK8 "BUT WHY IS THE RUM GONE?!?!"]]

* Barbossa's expression as Jack alludes to him not wanting to kill Will and lift the curse. It just says it all, he doesn't want to listen and is likely going to regret it, but he just has to find out what Jack means.
** And this exchange later, as Will is pulling a StopOrIShootMyself:

* The very beginning of the above scene: Jack and Barbossa are fighting in Isla De Muerta, Barbossa knocks Jack down and says "You can't beat me, Jack!". Jack then runs Barbossa through with his sword. Barbossa stabs Jack, who (unbeknownst to Barbossa) is cursed, and turns into a skeleton.