History Funny / OneThousandWaysToDie

16th Mar '18 8:52:27 PM tre-scott
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* '''Down With The Clown''': A birthday party clown named Funny Eddie is out to destroy a hip-hop {{Horrorcore}} duo called [[Music/InsaneClownPosse Infernal Clown Posse]] because he thinks they're ruining the reputation of clowns everywhere. Funny Eddie crashes one of their concerts and tries to get onstage, but gets hit in the head with a soda bottle. When he comes to, he decides to pull the plug on the concert and upstage the group. Turns out it's not such a good idea, as being drenched in soda made the clown conducive to the electricity in the wires and he got fried. Infernal Clown Posse's response: "IN! YOUR! FACE!"

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* '''Down With The with the Clown''': A birthday party clown named Funny Eddie is out to destroy a hip-hop {{Horrorcore}} duo called [[Music/InsaneClownPosse Infernal Clown Posse]] because he thinks they're ruining the reputation of clowns everywhere. Funny Eddie crashes one of their concerts and tries to get onstage, but gets hit in the head with a soda bottle. When he comes to, he decides to pull the plug on the concert and upstage the group. Turns out it's not such a good idea, as being drenched in soda made the clown conducive to the electricity in the wires and he got fried. Infernal Clown Posse's response: "IN! YOUR! FACE!"
16th Mar '18 8:51:54 PM tre-scott
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* '''Colon-Gross-Oppy''': A tomboy competes with her immature roommates in various contests, such as drinking beer and blowing balloons. When the time for a farting contest begins, she decides to one up them by [[AssShove sticking a can of whipped cream into her butt.]] But the gas from the can destroys her from the inside, killing her. As soon as the roommates show up to see what happened, though, the dead girl (who is bent over a couch with her butt sticking up) lets out a fart. Blood sprays onto one of the roommates' face, causing him to cry out:
'''Roommate #2''': I'm covered in ass blood!

to:

* '''Colon-Gross-Oppy''': A tomboy competes with her immature roommates in various contests, such as drinking beer and blowing balloons. When the time for a farting contest begins, she decides to one up them by [[AssShove sticking a can of whipped cream into her butt.]] But the gas from the can destroys her from the inside, killing her. As soon as the roommates show up to see what happened, though, the dead girl (who is bent over a couch with her butt sticking up) lets out a fart. Blood sprays onto one of the roommates' face, causing him to cry out:
'''Roommate #2''': I'm
out, "I'm covered in ass blood!blood!"
16th Mar '18 8:51:36 PM tre-scott
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* '''Greased is the Word''': An idiot who's already done time for a failed stick-up tries to rob a jewelry store. However, with his pantyhose mask blocking his vision, the moron draws a gun... ''[[TooDumbToLive on a gun shop]]''. You can guess how well [[MoreDakka that turns out]].

to:

* '''Greased is the Word''': An idiot who's already done time for a failed stick-up tries to rob a jewelry store. However, with his pantyhose mask blocking his vision, the moron draws a gun... ''[[TooDumbToLive on in a gun shop]]''. You can guess how well [[MoreDakka that turns out]].



* '''Work of Fart''': A frat boy is trying to win a farting contest by getting a coach with some of the weirdest methods imaginable. The coach dies when the frat boy accidentally [[{{Fartillery}} ignites a big one]], inadvertently setting the coach on fire.
** Even funnier is the frat boy's reaction:

to:

* '''Work of Fart''': A frat boy is trying to win a farting contest by getting a coach with some of the weirdest methods imaginable. The coach dies when the frat boy accidentally [[{{Fartillery}} ignites a big one]], inadvertently setting the coach on fire.
**
fire. Even funnier is the frat boy's reaction:



* '''Colon-Gross-Oppy''': A tomboy competes with her immature roommates in various contests, such as drinking beer and blowing balloons. When the time for a farting contest begins, she decides to one up them by [[AssShove sticking a can of whipped cream into her butt.]] But the gas from the can destroys her from the inside, killing her. As soon as the roommates show up to see what happened, though...
--> [The dead girl, who is bent over a couch with her butt sticking up, lets out a fart -- and blood sprays onto one of the roommates' face.]\\\

to:

* '''Colon-Gross-Oppy''': A tomboy competes with her immature roommates in various contests, such as drinking beer and blowing balloons. When the time for a farting contest begins, she decides to one up them by [[AssShove sticking a can of whipped cream into her butt.]] But the gas from the can destroys her from the inside, killing her. As soon as the roommates show up to see what happened, though...
--> [The
though, the dead girl, who girl (who is bent over a couch with her butt sticking up, up) lets out a fart -- and blood fart. Blood sprays onto one of the roommates' face.]\\\face, causing him to cry out:
16th Mar '18 8:50:17 PM tre-scott
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* '''Greased is the Word''': An idiot who's already done time for a failed stick-up tries to rob a jewelry store. However, with his pantyhose mask blocking his vision, the moron draws a gun '''[[TooDumbToLive on a gun shop]]'''. You can guess how well [[MoreDakka that turns out]].

to:

* '''Greased is the Word''': An idiot who's already done time for a failed stick-up tries to rob a jewelry store. However, with his pantyhose mask blocking his vision, the moron draws a gun '''[[TooDumbToLive gun... ''[[TooDumbToLive on a gun shop]]'''.shop]]''. You can guess how well [[MoreDakka that turns out]].
16th Mar '18 8:50:01 PM tre-scott
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* '''Gas Holed''': A proctologist with a fetish for woman's rear end forgets to tell a stripper (who suffered rectal injury during a porno movie shoot) with a nice ass to not eat anything before operating on her. She eats [[FireBreathingDiner a HUGE chilli dog]] and later [[{{Fartillery}} lets out a big fart during the surgery]]. . . accidentally blowing up the cauterizer and burning the DirtyOldMan doc's face and lungs.

to:

* '''Gas Holed''': A proctologist with a fetish for woman's rear end asses forgets to tell a stripper (who suffered a rectal injury during a porno movie shoot) with a nice ass to not eat anything before operating on her. She eats [[FireBreathingDiner a HUGE chilli large chili dog]] and later [[{{Fartillery}} lets out a big fart during the surgery]]. . . surgery]], accidentally blowing up the cauterizer and burning the DirtyOldMan doc's face and lungs.
16th Mar '18 8:48:06 PM tre-scott
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* '''Dung For''': An angry farmer chases after one of his workers in retaliation for the worker putting the moves on the farmer's daughter. The worker decided to hide in a truck WHICH IS ABOUT TO BE FILLED WITH COW MANURE, and ends up buried alive. When the farmer's daughter finds him when she opens the truck, her reaction is priceless [[NoodleIncident and it gives the impression that it happened to her before]].

to:

* '''Dung For''': An angry farmer chases after one of his workers in retaliation for the worker putting the moves on the farmer's daughter. The worker decided to hide in a truck WHICH IS ABOUT TO BE FILLED WITH COW MANURE, and truck... which is about to be filled with cow manure. He ends up getting buried alive. When the farmer's daughter finds him when she opens the truck, her reaction is priceless [[NoodleIncident and it gives the impression that it happened to her before]].



* '''Greased is the Word''': An idiot who's already done time for a failed stick-up tries to rob a jewelry store. However,with his pantyhose mask blocking his vision, the moron draws a gun '''[[TooDumbToLive on a gun shop]]'''. You can guess how well [[MoreDakka that turns out]].

to:

* '''Greased is the Word''': An idiot who's already done time for a failed stick-up tries to rob a jewelry store. However,with However, with his pantyhose mask blocking his vision, the moron draws a gun '''[[TooDumbToLive on a gun shop]]'''. You can guess how well [[MoreDakka that turns out]].



-->'''Saguaro voice:''' [[LargeHam YOU HAVE DISTURBED THE CACTUS UNIVERRRRRRRRRSE! YOU WILL DIE!!!! ]]

to:

-->'''Saguaro voice:''' [[LargeHam YOU HAVE DISTURBED THE CACTUS UNIVERRRRRRRRRSE! YOU WILL DIE!!!! DIE! ]]



* '''Work Of Fart''': A frat boy is trying to win a farting contest by getting a coach with some of the weirdest methods imaginable. The coach dies when the frat boy accidentally [[{{Fartillery}} ignites a big one]], inadvertently setting the coach on fire.

to:

* '''Work Of of Fart''': A frat boy is trying to win a farting contest by getting a coach with some of the weirdest methods imaginable. The coach dies when the frat boy accidentally [[{{Fartillery}} ignites a big one]], inadvertently setting the coach on fire.



-->"Oh, my god! [[CaptainObvious My fart killed you!]]"

to:

-->"Oh, my god! God! [[CaptainObvious My fart killed you!]]"
1st Mar '18 1:03:59 PM Jackie-Chaos-Bunny
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* '''Died-Zilla''': Katie is an ex-drug addict {{Bridezilla}} who relapses and snorts bath salts after receiving them as a gift at her bridal shower. Then she [[YourCheatingHeart has sex with the Best Man right before the wedding ceremony]]. By the time she is about to marry her fiancé, she succumbs to hyperthermia due to the bath salts, collapses at the altar and dies before she can even say "I do". The topper? In a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment at the very end of the segment, you see the groom ''fist bump'' one of his groomsmen, clearly relieved that he just avoided an obvious train wreck of a marriage.

to:

* '''Died-Zilla''': Katie is an ex-drug addict {{Bridezilla}} who relapses and snorts bath salts after receiving them as a gift at her bridal shower. Then she [[YourCheatingHeart has sex with the Best Man right before the wedding ceremony]]. By the time she is about to marry her fiancé, she succumbs to hyperthermia hypothermia due to the bath salts, collapses at the altar and dies before she can even say "I do". The topper? In a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment at the very end of the segment, you see the groom ''fist bump'' one of his groomsmen, clearly relieved that he just avoided an obvious train wreck of a marriage.
5th Nov '17 11:23:32 AM draph91
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* '''Died-Zilla''': Katie is an ex-drug addict {{Bridezilla}} who relapses and snorts bath salts after receiving them as a gift at her bridal shower. Then she [[YourCheatingHeart has sex with the Best Man right before the wedding ceremony]]. By the time she is about to marry her fiancé, she succumbs to hypothermia due to the bath salts, collapses at the altar and dies before she can even say "I do". The topper? In a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment at the very end of the segment, you see the groom ''fist bump'' one of his groomsmen, clearly relieved that he just avoided an obvious train wreck of a marriage.

to:

* '''Died-Zilla''': Katie is an ex-drug addict {{Bridezilla}} who relapses and snorts bath salts after receiving them as a gift at her bridal shower. Then she [[YourCheatingHeart has sex with the Best Man right before the wedding ceremony]]. By the time she is about to marry her fiancé, she succumbs to hypothermia hyperthermia due to the bath salts, collapses at the altar and dies before she can even say "I do". The topper? In a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment at the very end of the segment, you see the groom ''fist bump'' one of his groomsmen, clearly relieved that he just avoided an obvious train wreck of a marriage.
4th Sep '17 2:12:03 PM Ryan37352
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* '''Doggy Style''': Two drunk hunters go hunt ducks with their dog. They try to use dynamite to kill the ducks without shooting them, but the dog mistakes this as a game and returns the dynamite sticks to them, accidentally killing them as it explodes. Made even funnier because ''[[UnreliableNarrator it's all from the dog's POV]]''; you can pretty much hear the WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes theme in the background.

to:

* '''Doggy Style''': Styled''': Two drunk hunters go hunt ducks with their dog. They try to use dynamite to kill the ducks without shooting them, but the dog mistakes this as a game and returns the dynamite sticks to them, accidentally killing them as it explodes. Made even funnier because ''[[UnreliableNarrator it's all from the dog's POV]]''; you can pretty much hear the WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes theme in the background.
20th Jun '17 5:28:42 AM ChilledXSocks
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* '''Em-Bear-Assed''': A guy is high on shrooms and finds himself in a [[UsefulNotes/FurryFandom furry]] orgy. Wanting in, he finds a random furry and begins to screw it, only to find that it's an actual bear. He gets mauled. What makes it funnier is the narrator's recap of it.

to:

* '''Em-Bear-Assed''': A guy is high on shrooms and finds himself in a [[UsefulNotes/FurryFandom furry]] orgy. Wanting in, he finds a random furry and begins to screw it, only to find that it's [[BearsAreBadNews an actual bear.bear]]. He gets mauled. What makes it funnier is the narrator's recap of it.
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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.OneThousandWaysToDie