History Funny / HARRYPOTTER

* Funniest line in the ''Harry Potter'' movies which wasn't in the books: After Harry and Ron are sent into the Forbidden Forest to "follow the spiders", Ron, who has a [[WhyDidItHaveToBeSnakes previously established fear of spiders]], quips "Why spiders? Why couldn't it be 'follow the butterflies'?" Made even funnier by the director taking advantage of Rupert Grint's voice change hitting mid-movie. Yeah, that voice-cracking wasn't completely intentional.

!!Example subpages:

[[index]]
* Funny/LegoHarryPotter
[[/index]]

!!Individual Examples:

* In the UsefulNotes/GameBoyColor version of ''Chamber of Secrets'', if you turn the language to Spanish, the first time you enter Ginny's bedroom, you'll walk in on her experimenting with ways to say "Mrs. Ginny Potter".

!!!'''[[Film/HarryPotter ...and the Sorcerer's Stone]]'''

!!!'''...and the Chamber of Secrets'''

!!!'''...and the Prisoner of Azkaban'''

!!!'''...and the Goblet of Fire'''

!!!'''...and the Order of the Phoenix'''
* Crookshanks eating the Extendable Ear, and Fred and George's reaction: "Bloody cat!"

* Mrs. Weasley after Fred and George suddenly Apparate and scare her: "Just because you're allowed to use magic does not mean you can whip your wands out for everything!"

* The fireworks' scene, full stop. Some highlights:
** One of the whizbangs gets too close to Goyle's nose, so he swats it away. It goes after Crabbe, stinging him in the ass.
** Draco dodges another whizbang, and it leaves an imprint of his scared face on the door behind him.
** Umbridge's face of terror when she's running away, before the fire dragon engulfes her.
** The crowner, perhaps, the Educational Decrees around the door getting blasted into oblivion. Gives a completely new meaning to "breaking the rules".

!!!'''...and the Half-Blood Prince'''

* Words cannot describe the hilarity of Harry telling Cormac [=McLaggen=] that the appetizer he just put in his mouth was dragon balls ("[[Podcast/RiffTrax Dragon...]][[DramaticPause balls?]]"). Which he promptly sicks up onto the shoes of Severus Snape. Who puts [=McLaggen=] in detention!
* Harry coming back to the feast after being sneak attacked by Draco.
--> "[[LampshadeHanging He's covered in blood again. Why is he always covered in blood?]]"
--> "[[LampshadeHanging At least it looks like it's his this time]]."
* [=McGonagall=]'s exasperated "Why is it always you three?" upon discovering Harry, Ron, and Hermione are caught up in the crisis du jour yet ''[[WeirdnessMagnet again]]''. And Ron's reply, for that matter.
-->'''[=McGonagall=]:''' (to Harry, Ron, and Hermione) Why is it that, whenever anything happens, it's always ''you'' three?
-->'''Ron:''' I've been wondering that myself for six years, Professor.

* Price negotiations with Fred and George.
-->'''Ron:''' How much are these?\\
'''Fred and George:''' Five galleons.\\
'''Ron:''' How much for me?\\
'''Fred and George:''' Five galleons.\\
'''Ron:''' I'm your ''brother.''\\
(Beat)\\
'''Fred and George:''' ''Ten'' galleons.

* Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes shop features an animated doll of Umbridge skating across a tightrope, squealing "[[TyrantTakesTheHelm I will have order! I will have order!]]"
* Ron staring at the moon when he is under Romilda Vane's love charm.
-->'''Ron:''' It's beautiful, isn't it? The moon.
-->'''Harry:''' Divine. Had ourselves a little late night snack, did we?
-->'''Ron:''' It was on your bed, the box, I just thought I'd try one.
-->'''Harry:''' Or twenty.
-->'''Ron:''' I can't stop thinking about her, Harry.
-->'''Harry:''' Honestly, you know, I reckon she was starting to annoy you.
-->'''Ron:''' She could never annoy me. I think I love her.
-->'''Harry:''' Oh... brilliant.
-->'''Ron:''' Do you think she knows I exist?
-->'''Harry:''' Well, I'd bloody well hope so, she's been snogging you for three months.
-->'''Ron:''' Snogging? [[OneDialogueTwoConversations Who are you talking about?]]
-->'''Harry:''' Who are ''you'' talking about?
-->'''Ron:''' Romilda, of course. Romilda Vane.
-->'''Harry:''' Okay, very funny.
-->'''Ron:''' (throws the chocolates box at Harry)
-->'''Harry:''' What was that for?
-->'''Ron:''' It's no joke! I'm in love with her!
-->'''Harry:''' Alright, fine, you're in love with her! Have you ever actually met her?
-->'''Ron:''' No... Can you introduce me?
* The Quidditch tryouts. Specifically, the comparison between Ron and [=McLaggen=] handling their...[[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything broomsticks]].
* Ginny acting as Harry's 2nd in command. When he fails to get everybody to listen to him, she steps in:
-->'''Ginny''': [[BigShutUp Shut It!]] ''(everybody quiets down)''
-->'''Harry''': Thanks.

* This exchange:
--> '''Hermione:''' She only likes you because she thinks you're The Chosen One!
--> '''Harry:''' But I ''am'' The Chosen One!
--> [[DopeSlap [Hermione whacks him over the head with her book] ]]
* Snape's "How disappointing." Especially the following exchange from ''Half-Blood Prince'':
-->'''Snape''': [[DramaticPause Not... so quick]], Potter.
-->'''Harry''': Oh sir I really think I should get back to the party. My date...
-->'''Snape''': ...could surely survive your absence another minute or two.

* The scene where Ron is in the hospital wing after being poisoned, and his annoying girlfriend Lavender comes in worried and asking "Where's my Won-Won?" She and Hermione get into a fight over him, where Hermione calls her a "daft dimbo"! What makes this even funnier is that it's happening in front of the teachers — Dumbledore, [=McGonagall=], Slughorn, and '''Snape'''. Then Ron calls out Hermione's name in his sleep, and Lavender runs off crying; Dumbledore quips "Oh, to be young and to feel love's keen sting!" While [=McGonagall=] and Snape keep their cool after Lavender storms off, Dumbledore is the only one who turns to look at her. Snape just stares straight ahead during that scene. It also becomes a little funny and sad once you realize that he should know how Lavender feels, and it gets sadder still when one remembers how the last time Dumbledore felt "love's keen sting" went for him...
** What really settles it is the ''dialogue''! No, seriously, it's bloody hilarious:
-->'''Lavender''': Where is he? Where's my [[EpicFail Won-Won]]? Has he been asking for me? ...What's [[TheSmartGuy SHE]] doing here?!
-->'''Hermione''': I was asking the same question!
-->'''Lavender''': I ''happen'' to be his ''girlfriend''!
-->'''Hermione''': I happen to be his... [[JustFriends friend]]!
-->'''Lavender''': Don't give me that! [[SilentTreatment You haven't spoken in weeks!]] It's nice to make up with him now that he's suddenly all ''interesting''!
-->'''Hermione''': He's been ''[[TamperingWithFoodAndDrink poisoned]]'', you daft dimbo! And for the record, I've always found him interesting!
-->'''Ron''': *groans*
-->'''Lavender''': Ha! See? He senses my presence! Don't worry, [[EpicFail Won-Won]]! I'm here... I'm here!
-->'''Ron''': ...Hermusseh... Er-my-nee... Her...mione... Hermione... Hermione...
-->'''Lavender''': *runs off crying*
* The entire Felix Felicis scenario is comic gold. Harry, with his uncharacteristically peppy attitude, [[LargeHam steals the entire scene]] (especially when he wiggles his fingers to act out spiders' pincers). [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything He's acting like he's high]].
-->(after Harry has told Slughorn about leaving the castle)
-->'''Slughorn:''' Harry!
-->'''Harry:''' (In similar annoyed tone) Sir!

* When Harry and Dumbledore are about to leave for the cave:
-->'''Harry''': But sir, I thought you couldn't Apparate in Hogwarts.
-->'''Dumbledore''': Well, being me definitely has its advantages.
* Ginny and Harry share their first kiss inside the Room of Requirement. Aww. Immediately cut to...
-->'''Ron''': Did you and Ginny do it, then?

!!!'''...and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1'''

!!!'''...and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2'''

* Ron complaining about Krum: "Ruddy pumpkinhead!"
* "Hermione... [[CaptainObvious you're a girl!]]" Probably funnier is Hermione's reaction: [[DeadpanSnarker "Oh, well spotted."]]
* The Veritaserum scene.
-->'''Snape''': Do you know what this is, Potter? [holding a bottle that looks like two bubbles connected]
-->'''Harry''' (wearing a hilariously smug expression): Bubble juice, sir?
* Snape lamenting that the Veritaserum's use on students is "regrettably forbidden."
* The studying scene, where Harry and Ron keep on getting caught talking by Snape and get their heads smacked by a book and forced down for their troubles. The uber-annoyed look Snape gives and the precise manner in which he pulled up his sleeves before shoving their heads down was the icing on the funny cake.
* Harry meets Rita Skeeter.
-->'''Harry''': My eyes are not "glistening with the ghosts of my past"!
* When Myrtle gets in the tub with Harry.
* Neville gives Harry gillyweed for the Second Task, which takes place underwater. When he doesn't appear to surface after a few minutes, Neville turns around, grabbing the sides of his head in a panic, "Oh my God! I've killed Harry Potter!"
* This gem from Lucius Malfoy:
-->'''Weasley Twin''': Blimey, Dad! How far up are we?
-->'''Lucius''': [[DeadpanSnarker Well, put it this way: If it rains, you'll be the first to know.]]

* The playful teasing that the rest of the group gives Ron as he's raving about Viktor Krum, culminating in everyone breaking out into song.
-->'''Ron''': He's more than an athlete, he's an ''artist''.
-->'''Ginny''': I think you're in love, Ron.
-->'''Ron''': Shut up.
-->'''Fred''': ''Viktor, I love you.''
-->'''George''': ''Viktor, I do.''
-->'''Fred, George, and Harry''': ''When we're apart, my heart beats only for you!''

* Another deleted scene, where Harry spies Karkaroff trying to talk to Snape - who ignores him in favor of turfing canoodling students out of the carriages, and docking points from their houses.
* Ferret!Draco going right [[SquirrelsInMyPants down Crabbe's pants]]. Nuff said.

* The UST between Hermione and Ron in ''Prisoner of Azkaban''. The first is during the lecture where Buckbeak is introduced and Hermione, in a panic, grabs Ron's hand. He proceeds to give her this amazed look, and she shoots him a glance that says "Don't you say a word". The second is when they're visiting the Shrieking Shack, and Hermione asks if he wants to get closer. After [[{{Beat}} a short uncomfortable pause]], she specifies that she meant closer to the shack.
** The first one gets a lampshade by the Podcast/RiffTrax:
--> '''Mike''': "Hermione casts the 'give Ron a boner' spell."

* Pretty much all of Harry's confusion at going back in time, since Hermione takes her sweet time telling him in the movie, but the best part being right after he sees his past self for the first time.
--> '''Harry''' (two seconds away from freaking out): "This is ''not normal.''"
** Also some of Harry and Hermione's lines while watching themselves, especially this:
--> '''Hermione:''' Is that really what my hair looks like from the back?

* "Turn to page Three Hundred and Ninety-four."

* After Harry blows up Aunt Marge and she flies away, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent Petunia can be seen slowly waving goodbye.]]

* Harry attacking Malfoy, Goyle, and Crabbe while invisible after they call Hermione a Mudblood. This includes throwing snowballs at them, pantsing Goyle and shoving him to the ground, grabbing Crabbe's scarf and spinning him around by it, and dragging Malfoy across the snow by his feet. All the while hiding under the Invisibility Cloak. Then after they retreat, Harry, still invisible, plays with Ron's hat and Hermione's hair before finally revealing himself.

* In a CallBack to ''Chamber of Secrets'', we have the scene in ''Prisoner of Azkaban'', where Ron is having a nightmare:
-->'''Ron''': "Spiders, Harry! They want me to tap dance. And I don't want to tap dance!"
-->'''Harry''': "You tell those spiders, Ron."
** And immediately afterward, muttering that he'll tell those spiders, he lays back down. As soon as his head touches his pillow, he's snoring again.

* When Hagrid asks who wants to ride Buckbeak, everyone backs off a step, [[GotVolunteered making it look like]] Harry has just volunteered.

* The coda to the floating aunt episode. As Harry stalks off, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent Aunt Marge is visible bobbing and floating off into the distance. Brief, no dialogue, just some distant sound-effects and it's one of the funniest moments in the films.]]

* Dumbledore can make a simple "good night" funny.
-->'''Dumbledore:''' Well?
-->'''Harry:''' [Sirius]'s free. We did it.
-->'''Dumbledore:''' Did what? Good night.