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Not missions. Crusades.
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The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think its mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart, and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.
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The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think its mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions Crusades to bring back his master. On the mission While there, he uncovers discovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart, and he is of Royal stock and stock. He must therefore bring them back both back.his master and King Richard.
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* TheTourney: Sir Braggart challenges Sir Coward to a duel, with Lady Lobelia as the prize. Lurkalot, although not a knight, takes up the challenge as the "Man with no name" and defeats Sir Braggart's champion, Sir Grumbell de Grunt, with the aid of a giant magnet. Realising that the rules of chivalry have not been met, Sir Braggart declares the duel void and declares war.
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Anything That Moves is a disambiguation
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* AnythingThatMoves: King Richard will sleep with anything female and mildly attractive. And even the 'mildly attractive' is negotiable. When starved for other female company, he sleeps with Winifred the Goatherd, who is overweight and famed for her pungent body odour.
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''Up the Chastity Belt'' (also released as ''Naughty Knights'' and ''The Chastity Belt'' in the United States) is a 1972 British film directed by Bob Kellett and starring Creator/FrankieHowerd. It was the second film spin-off from the TV series ''Series/UpPompeii''.
The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think its mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.
The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think its mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.
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''Up the Chastity Belt'' (also released as ''Naughty Knights'' and ''The Chastity Belt'' in the United States) is a 1972 British film directed by Bob Kellett and starring Creator/FrankieHowerd.Creator/FrankieHowerd, Graham Crowden, Bill Fraser, Roy Hudd, Hugh Paddick, Anna Quayle, and Anne Aston, with special appearances by Fred Emney, Dave King, Creator/LancePercival, Nora Swinburn, and Godfrey Winn. It was the second film spin-off from the TV series ''Series/UpPompeii''.
The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think its mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard theLionheart Lionheart, and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.
The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think its mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the
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* AllClothUnravels: Lurkalot gets the threads of Lady Ashfodel's tapestry hooked on his belt, and unravels it when he storms out of the room.
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* AllClothUnravels: Lurkalot gets the threads of Lady Ashfodel's tapestry hooked on his belt, belt and unravels it when he storms out of the room.
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* ArtisticLicenseHistory: It is doubtful anyone was expecting historical accuracy from this film, but suffice it to say that UsefulNotes/RichardTheLionheart did not have a twin brother named Lurkalot, not did he ever marry a woman named Lobelia.
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* ArtisticLicenseHistory: It is doubtful anyone was expecting historical accuracy from this film, film but suffice it to say that UsefulNotes/RichardTheLionheart did not have a twin brother named Lurkalot, not nor did he ever marry a woman named Lobelia.
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''Up the Chastity Belt'' (also released as ''Naughty Knights'' and ''The Chastity Belt'' in the United States) is a 1971 British film directed by Bob Kellett and starring Creator/FrankieHowerd. It was a spin-off from the TV series ''Series/UpPompeii''.
to:
''Up the Chastity Belt'' (also released as ''Naughty Knights'' and ''The Chastity Belt'' in the United States) is a 1971 1972 British film directed by Bob Kellett and starring Creator/FrankieHowerd. It was a the second film spin-off from the TV series ''Series/UpPompeii''.
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* BatteringRam: Sir Braggart's men use a battering in an attempt to break into Lurkalot's workshop, but he defeats them with DoorJudo.
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* BatteringRam: Sir Braggart's men use a battering ram in an attempt to break into Lurkalot's workshop, but he defeats them with DoorJudo.
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* CampGay: Robin Hood and his Merry Men. Will Scarlet qualifies a MachoCamp. Also a StealthPun as they live in a 'camp' in Sherwood Forest.
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* CampGay: Robin Hood and his Merry Men. Will Scarlet qualifies a as MachoCamp. Also a StealthPun as they live in a 'camp' in Sherwood Forest.
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None
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The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think it's mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.
to:
The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think it's its mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back.
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* BatteringRam: Sir Braggart's men use a battering in an attempt to break into Lukalot's workshop, but he defeats them with DoorJudo.
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* BatteringRam: Sir Braggart's men use a battering in an attempt to break into Lukalot's Lurkalot's workshop, but he defeats them with DoorJudo.
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* CampGay: Robin Hood and his Merry Men. Will Scarlet qualifies a MachoCamp. Also a StealthPun as they live in a 'camp' in Sherwood Forest.
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* MachoCamp: Will Scarlet is this among Myth/RobinHood's band of Merry Men (all of whom are gay). Will is a WalkingShirtlessScene who is usually posing. However, the final fight shows that he is one of the best combatants in the film.
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* CoitusInterruptus: Richard and Winnie continue having sex despite Lurkalot and Braggart having a running sword fight through the room.
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* CoitusUninterruptus: Richard and Winnie continue having sex despite Lurkalot and Braggart having a running sword fight through the room.
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* AnythingThatMoves: King Richard will sleep with anything female and mildly attractive. And even the 'mildly attractive' is negotiable. When starved for other female company, he sleeps with Winifred the Goatherd, who is overweight and famed for her pungent body odour.
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* HappyHarlequinHat: Lurkalot wears one as part of his motley when he is forced to act as jester at Sir Coward's feast.
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* WeirdTradeUnion: Lurkalot and Sir Coward organise Saladin's harem girls into a union as part of plan to cut off King Richard's supply of nookie and force him to return to England.
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* BornUnlucky: The marketplace scene features a pedlar selling lucky charms who suffers an unending TraumaCongaLine of bad luck that almost cripples him.
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* AshFace: Lurkalot and Sir Coward end up like this following Lurkalot's AccidentalDiscovery of gunpowder.
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* YeGoodeOldeDays: Despite being a comedy, ''Up the Chastity Belt'' plays the environmental aspects of chivalric romances remarkably straight, with no one ever being besmirched by their physicals exertions, whether it is in sodden England or the scorching heat of the Holy Land. TheDungAges is only invoked when needed for a particular joke.
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* TheGhost: Prince John is mentioned frequently, but never actually appears; despite him taking over the country in Richard's absence.
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* VineSwing: Robin Hood swings in on a vine and lands in front of Lurkalot as he is making his way through Sherwood Forest.
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* BadHabits: Lurkalot disguises himself as a friar in order to to smuggle Sir Coward into the castle.
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* BadHabits: Lurkalot disguises himself as a friar in order to to smuggle Sir Coward into the castle. King Richard disguises himself as a nun to avoid being caught in the bedroom of the wife of a German knight.
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* AccidentalDiscovery: While attempting to cure Sir Coward's intoxication, Lurkalot mixes a medicine consisting of sulphur and charcoal, which then has saltpeter knocked into when he is not looking. When he tosses the resulting concoction on to the brazier, it explodes. Realising he has invented something significant, he names it 'gone powder' because it makes things 'gone'.
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* LovePotion: Lurkalot has a sideline in making and selling aphrodisiacs. It is not known if these are effective or just a scam.
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* DoItYourselfThemeSong: Eartha Kitt, who plays Scheherazade, also sings the theme song "A Knight for My Nights".
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* DoItYourselfThemeSong: DoItYourselfThemeTune: Eartha Kitt, who plays Scheherazade, also sings the theme song "A Knight for My Nights".
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* DoItYourselfThemeSong: Eartha Kitt, who plays Scheherazade, also sings the theme song "A Knight for My Nights".
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* DisguisedInDrag: Lurkalot and Sir Coward disguise themselves as women in order to unionise the BedlahBabes and encourage them to stage a LysistrataGambit.
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* DisguisedInDrag: Lurkalot and Sir Coward disguise themselves as women in order to unionise the BedlahBabes {{Bedlah Babe}}s and encourage them to stage a LysistrataGambit.
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* LysistrataGambit: Lurkalot and Sir Coward [[DisguisedInDrag disguise themselves as women]] and persuade Saladin's {{Bedlah Babe}}s to withhold sex from the crusaders, so that King Richard will becomes despondent, ball off the Crusade, and return to England.
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* LysistrataGambit: Lurkalot and Sir Coward [[DisguisedInDrag disguise themselves as women]] and persuade Saladin's {{Bedlah Babe}}s to withhold sex from the crusaders, so that King Richard will becomes become despondent, ball call off the Crusade, and return to England.
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* AnachronismStew: From the comparatively minor (e.g. Lurkalot's horseshoe magnet) to the downright ludicrous) (e.g. Saladin running a go-go club for crusading knights). All PlayedForLaughs, of course.
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* AnachronismStew: From the comparatively minor (e.g. Lurkalot's horseshoe magnet) to the downright ludicrous) ludicrous (e.g. Saladin running a go-go club for crusading knights). All PlayedForLaughs, of course.
